


Signum Vitalis

by Samfparker



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Christianity, Deviates From Canon, Eventual Romance, F/M, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Healer Draco Malfoy, Healer Hermione Granger, Helpful critiques are welcome, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Medical School, Mental Health Issues, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Religion, Religion isn't part of the main plot but it is discussed at length in a couple of the chapters, Romance, Sikhism, Slow Burn, This is my first fic so it starts slow, this is cross posted on fanfiction and wattpad under the same username
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2020-10-17 09:23:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 57
Words: 142,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20618702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samfparker/pseuds/Samfparker
Summary: Haunted by the war, Hermione attends a Healer school in America to escape it all. Instead, she runs into Draco Malfoy.At first, they are too caught up in battling their own demons to do much more than return to their childhood squabbling. But slowly perspectives change. Eventually they find they can be the other's strength to overcome the ghosts that war left behind.This fic is a VERY slow burn with a lot of relationship building before the romance as they sort through their own baggage.





	1. Chapter 1

Hermione stirred her tea in its styrofoam cup and wished she was actually interested in its contents. Around her, her American classmates had begun to form huddled groups, chatting and laughing over their steaming coffee cups. She was reminded of her first year and fought down the urge to pull one of the textbooks from her book-bag and start reading.

She scanned the break room, trying to find a familiar face. The school was completely different from Hogwarts, filled with metal chairs and several distinctly muggle-looking contraptions along the walls. It was too sleek and modern, just like the students. At least half of them weren't wearing robes, and most of those who wore 'robes' would still have easily blended in with the muggles outside. Near one of the doors, she spotted a short girl with red hair, similar to Ginny's, wearing a brilliant color of green robes. After a deep breath, she edged from her corner towards the girl, weaving around the other students.

Once she reached the girl's side, Hermione realized that the girl had little resemblance to Ginny besides her hair color. This girl wore a noticeable amount of makeup and was whispering snarkily behind her hand to a short-haired girl across from her. Hermione swallowed, searching around for a different reason to be there, but the red-haired girl looked over and raised an eyebrow.

"Er, Hi!" Hermione tried to say brightly. "My name is Hermione Granger, how about you?"

The red-haired girl glanced from Hermione's shoes up to her hair, "Hermione Granger? Weren't you always in that London paper… _The Seer _was it?"

"_The Prophet_, yes, I was occasionally. Though-"

"Caught up in the middle of that nasty pureblood business weren't you?"

"Er… I'm a muggle-born who fought with many others against Voldemort to protect the lives and magical rights of all witches and wizards." Hermione responded, trying to keep the terseness out of her voice. "I'm sorry, what did you say your name was?"

"Shandra," the girl responded, flipping her hair over her shoulder and staring Hermione down with her brown eyes.

"Nice to meet you," Hermione said as genuinely as she could. "How about you?" Hermione turned to the short-haired girl.

"Lorraine," the girl said with a large smile. "Kinda cool to be meeting a magical celebrity like you, Hermione. What was it like, fighting in a war with magic?"

Hermione bit her lip and swallowed. "Probably very similar to one without magic." She had to get out of there before these girls said something to trigger her flashbacks. She could already feel the sweat at the back of her neck. "Excuse me, I need to-" she trailed off when nothing good came to mind. She turned away, looking for a large group to duck behind before things could get worse. Instead, she nearly spilled her tea all over a boy's front.

"I'm so sorry!" Hermione stepped backwards and fought the burn in her cheeks and eyes. She quickly whipped out her wand to remove a few tea droplets on herself with a quick 'tergeo' and examined the boys sweater vest as well. "I don't think I got anything on you…" she trailed off as she recognized the green and silver stripes along the sweater's neck. Her breath stopped, and inevitably her eyes trailed up to meet unmistakably grey ones. Her hand had already changed positions on her wand before she formed a complete thought. Adrenaline beat against her temples, and her vision narrowed so she could make out his eye's dark blue outline and the gold specks around his pupils.

"Granger." His voice had gotten deeper, or maybe she could only remember it from when he still had his high boy's voice.

"...Malfoy?" she was still bracing herself for… a curse? a taunt? She wasn't sure. The adrenaline was still pumping and she had already identified the closest exit and the best spell to throw in a crowded place.

"What are the chances of meeting an old schoolmate here of all places?"

"Yes," she replied a bit numbly. "What _are_ you doing here Malfoy?"

"I thought someone with a supposedly brilliant mind like you would be able to deduce that easily," Malfoy sneered, and even with his deeper voice and mature face, he sounded like the old Malfoy. The one she had slapped after he insulted Hagrid.

"I meant in _New York_, Malfoy," she answered in her prefect tone saved for snogging tossers who pretended they didn't know they were out past curfew.

Malfoy leered over her and said condescendingly, "I'll take pity on you, since it seems your hair finally grew enough to take over you brain, I'm going to Healer's School."

Hermione gritted her teeth. Ignoring how much she wanted to bite out a sharp reply to his insult, she smiled tightly, "Well, good luck." She turned back to the lesser evils, but Shandra and Lorraine were both looking over her shoulder.

"Hermione, please introduce us to your friend!" Lorraine smiled her large smile full of beautiful teeth. Shandra batted her eyes at Malfoy and didn't bother looking at Hermione at all.

Hermione winced, "Girls, this is Draco Malfoy, we went to school together. I'm sure he'd be better at introducing himself beyond that." She moved away from the group, hoping that she had just hit three birds with the same stone.

"Aw, _Hermione_, I think it would be much more entertaining coming from you," Malfoy caught the wrist of her wand hand.

Hermione froze and then turned to glare at him. "We are not friends, as you well know. Do not address me informally and remove your hand immediately," she hissed. She glanced over to Shandra and Lorraine who were watching the exchange with fascination.

Instead of answering, Malfoy was looking past her, "is that tea, Granger?"

Hermione registered the cup of tea in her other hand.

"Breakfast tea?" he asked.

"Let me go, Malfoy."

Surprisingly, he did.

"Where is the tea? I can't drink coffee," he scanned the room behind her.

"What, didn't bring your own special pureblood blend with you?" Hermione asked sarcastically as she backed out of reach.

"Shut it, Granger," Malfoy said fiercely, backing her against another group of students. "Don't mention that I'm a pureblood around here," he leaned down to breath the last part angrily into her ear.

"_What?_" Hermione asked.

Right behind Malfoy, an older man in healer's robes cleared his throat and Malfoy froze.

* * *

Hey Guys this is my Author's Note.

I've read quite a few fanfics but I'm rather new at actually writing one! I would REALLY appreciate any feedback on anything about this- really. House points and eternal gratitude to anyone who is so kind as to review!


	2. In which Hermione shares her tea

"Good morning students!" The old man's voice carried across the break room and gradually the chatting died down. Hermione was still cornered by Malfoy and watched his face relax infinitesimally once the old man began speaking. "I hope you have all enjoyed exchanging pleasantries with your fellow wizards and witches," the old man continued. "We are going to begin orientation in the lecture hall, so if you would all please follow me?"

"Malfoy," Hermione began as the students started chatting again. "Why can't I say you are a-"

At this, Malfoy shot her a glare.

"You-know-what?" she finished.

"What, something else you don't know, Granger?"

"I thought you were always proud of your status?" Hermione asked, _and that's putting it mildly_ she added mentally.

Malfoy's lips thinned and he looked away, watching as the other students began to make their way to the door that the old man had exited from. Hermione carefully tucked her wand away again. Finally he turned back to her, his lip curled. "Granger, just keep it to yourself, _please_." He spat the last word with a snarl.

"Fine," the word escaped her before she had time to think about it. "I will," she amended quickly, "as long as I don't have any reason to share it."

His eyebrows furrowed and he squinted a little at her, "Granger… was that a threat?"

Hermione put a hand on her hip, "Only if it needs to be, I don't feel comfortable promising anything to you. I'm sure you understand."

A emotion flashed across his face but, before she recognized it, he smirked, "I'm a Slytherin, of course I understand. I'm just wondering how much of a Slytherin you are."

"Like I would ever let myself be like you!" Hermione responded hotly. She glanced around in embarrassment when she accidentally said it too loud and realized how few students there were left.

Malfoy noticed as well and straightened. He ran a hand through his hair and glanced down at Hermione.

"Guess I'll just have to survive lecture without any tea," he sighed to himself, the sentence barely audible to her.

Hermione eyed her tea, realizing that she had not gained any more appetite for it than she had started with. Trying not to think too much, she shoved it into his hand. "Its only red tea, but I don't have the stomach for it right now, anyways."

He automatically grabbed the cup when she pushed it towards his chest, but now stood still, staring down at it.

Hermione let out a breath between her teeth, "Honestly, Malfoy, I haven't drunk any of it yet. But, if even the thought of me touching something you drink disturbs you, then just give it back to me." She held her hand out impatiently.

He held the styrofoam cup a little tighter and pulled it closer to him.

"You can't change your mind so quickly, you gave it to me and I'm keeping it."

Hermione rolled her eyes and held her hands up in mock surrender. Adjusting her book bag, she followed the last of the students out the door. Malfoy followed and, with his longer legs, was soon ahead of her. As they walked down the hallway, she watched as he first took a small sip, swished it in his mouth, and then tilted the cup up to take a longer swallow. She couldn't see his face but, as far as she could tell, he hadn't spit it back out. Once they reached the lecture hall he disappeared among the desks teeming with students. Hermione, grateful she no longer had to deal with the strange experience of being half friendly with a long established enemy, found a seat close to the front, careful to avoid the noisier groups. She began organizing her supplies on her desk.

"Woah, quill and scroll?" A freckled boy next to her leaned over to watch her dip the quill and begin writing the date. "I haven't seen that in awhile!"

"It's standard in Hogwarts, where did you go?"

"Muggle school, but I went to magical school during the summer."

"During the summer? How did you learn everything!" Hermione couldn't help feeling a little aghast.

"We probably learned a lot less than you English people," he said with a smile. "We mainly just learned the practical things."

Hermione opened her mouth, internally struggling whether to voice her indignation at the boy's use of 'practical' or just return his charming smile. She was interrupted by the Sonorused voice of a professor echoing aross the hall and so she settled on the smile before turning to the front.

At first she took scrupulous notes but the Professor seemed to be going in circles. This felt like at least the third time the Professor had mentioned how doing well in their studies would prepare them to be skilled healers. She scanned her notes. Yes, she was right. There it was at the beginning of the lecture and stated slightly differently in another bullet point further down the page. As the Professor began speaking about the wards cast on the school, her interest peaked but it fell fairly quickly as she realized he was only mentioning it to emphasize that cheaters would easily be caught. As the lecture continued about the consequences of cheating, she worked out the most likely charms that the professors had used to ward the school. Once she had determined them, she felt, unless they had charms she was unfamiliar with, that the Professor had been exaggerating a tad about how well the charms worked.

The boy who had talked to her earlier was busy playing what suspiciously looked like an Nintendo game, which he must have magicked to work within all the school's wards. That was tricky spellwork and Hermione studied him awhile, wondering if he had cast the spell. It would probably fall under the boy's definition of 'practical' magic but she doubted he could have cast it without knowledge of a tad of preliminary 'unpractical' magic.

From her position a little farther back than normal, Hermione noticed that several wizards and witches were similarly occupied. As she scanned the rest of the students, her eyes were inadvertently drawn to the platinum blonde hair of Draco Malfoy. Bored, she watched as he played with a mixing stick she had put in the tea. He threw a tight smirk at a girl beside him that had turned in her seat to completely face him. She was talking animatedly at him and the end of particular dramatic sentence she flipped her hair over her shoulder. It probably was the girl from the break room… Shandra. Malfoy stretched his legs out onto the back of the chair in front of him and massaged his temples. Hermione was torn between feeling pity or gloating at his misfortune. He glanced up in her direction and Hermione quickly turned back to the lecture.

She tried to refocus on the Professor, who was stressing the importance of high grades, and sighed, wishing they would get to actual lesson material. When class finally ended, Hermione began reorganizing her materials in preparation for the next class, and the Nintendo boy leaned over to talk to her.

"So, Hogwarts, that means you're from England? Thats pretty cool, you've got a nice accent."

Hermione smiled, grateful that he had enough tact to keep to safe subjects, "Thank you."

"What was your name?"

"Please call me Granger," she said, learning from introducing herself last time.

"John Thomson."

The boy reached out to grab her hand and shook it. His fingers were calloused.

"Why did you come to America? I mean, I'm glad you're here-"

Hermione laughed and interrupted the start of his awkward rambling, "I understand. There were a lot of reasons. Some of them… personal. I heard that this school was very progressive. I like when the learning process is coupled with evolving theories and research…" Hermione trailed off as she recognized the expression on the boy's face. Ron and Harry always wore it whenever she wanted to share something interesting she had read, at least before she learned better of it. "And… er, why did you come here?"

John smiled again, "Dad wanted me to. He's got-"

He stopped as someone came up behind Hermione and brushed past her knees. She didn't think much of it until that person sat down right between her and Nintendo boy. Someone with blonde hair.

"Malfoy?"

To her exasperation, it was. "Yes, Granger?"

* * *

Author's Note:

THANK YOU, THANK YOU you lovely people who gave kudos and comments!

I'm planning on updating this fic on Fridays.

I also would love to know what parts you think are working and what parts not so much. Are house points still a good bribe?


	3. In which Hermione takes her seat

She wasn't sure which obvious fact she should state first. "We're in the middle of a conversation and there are still quite a few empty seats that aren't by me!"

"Yes, but I needed a seat flanked by two people."

"Er... what?"

"_Dear_ Granger, don't you understand the art of avoiding someone?"

"Normally they are trying to avoid me as well, not interrupting my conversations," Hermione replied, mystified.

Draco brushed a hand over his mouth and looked over at her with a raised eyebrow. "Not _you_, Granger, I'm trying to avoid another daft girl."

"Well, good luck," Hermione angrily started gathering her things to move to the other side of Nintendo boy but Malfoy reached out and blocked her path with an arm. She started down at it, debating whether she should just push past it or verbally thrash him until he moved it himself.

"Please, Granger, she is giving me headache and I can't hear a word the Professors are saying. Surely as a bookworm you can pity me that much?"

Hermione bristled, "What, your usual lack of tact isn't scaring her off or…" Hermione thought of several things she could say about why he wasn't being rude to this girl but decided she didn't want him to know she had thought of any of them.

"Fine I'll try to reign in my 'lack of tack' just let me stay here, just for today. I haven't found any groupies to protect me yet."

"Poor Malfoy," She responded sarcastically, remembering some of his groupies with a sick twist in her gut. She had just decided to shove past Malfoy when Nintendo boy spoke up.

"Come on, lets take pity on him, Granger."

Hermione turned on him, trying to keep her expression from reading 'are you daft?'

"The guy is practically on his knees, she must be pretty scary," the Nintendo boy, John, said with an appeasing smile.

"She's-" Hermione stopped as she realized she had almost revealed she had watched Shandra chat Draco up and therefore knew who Draco was referring to. She tried to think of something else to say without making her look like a insensitive prat.

She gestured towards Malfoy and said in a wheedling tone, "but he and I aren't… on civil terms. If you know what I mean?" She tried to add a cute smile at the end, like she had seen Ginny use on Harry, but had a feeling she failed when Malfoy snorted. She shot a glare at him, running through her nonverbal spell arsenal to see if she had any she could use inconspicuously.

"It sounds like you guys have quite the history," John said instead.

Hermione wanted to strangle the boy. Was he being oblivious on purpose? "A history I _don't_ want to be reminded of." She hoped he got the hint.

"There you are Draco!" came a girlish voice behind her that gave her flashbacks to Hogwarts. She turned reluctantly to meet the pretty face of Shandra.

"Draco, is that seat taken?" Shandra was again completely ignoring Hermione, who's bookbag still rested on said seat. Suddenly, Hermione felt irrationally possessive of the seat she had been trying to escape.

"Actually, er... Shandra, that's Granger's seat."

"Oh, you mean Hermione?" Shandra spared a disinterested glance. Hermione clenched her teeth.

"Please call me Granger," she said, staring Shandra down coolly.

"Good Morning class, I'm Professor Greythorn," a woman's voice echoed through the hall this time. Hermione's good student mode kicked in and she automatically sat down in the closest chair, turning her head attentively. When Sandra shoved past, Hermione remembered that she was still sitting next to Draco. She looked around for the nearest open seat and saw some towards the middle of the row. However, getting to them would require stepping over the feet of at least six or seven people while the professor was speaking. She sighed, settling back into her seat, and hoped that the class would be uneventful.

"I will be in charge of all of your clinical classes this semester," the Professor continued. "Here you will learn the charms that form a foundation for all of your other diagnostic spells. That means I expect none of you to slack off in my classes." Hermione idly wondered if they had been preceded by such an incompetent class that all the professors felt a need to drill diligence and honesty in their heads right off the bat.

This professor's orientation speech wasn't as bad as the previous one, but she still spent quite a bit of time breaking down magical concepts for her less educated classmates. The scratching of a quill on parchment distracted her. As far as she could tell, her American classmates didn't use quills or parchment on a regular basis: they all were very fond of their bic pens and lined paper. That meant the most likely culprit was sitting right next to her. Some dimwit asked the teacher about the relatively simple 'Reperio Alica' spell the Professor had already explained. The scribbling continued.

Hadn't they covered this extensively in fourth year charms class? Maybe she had been fooled about his intelligence in school. Her curiosity getting the better of her, Hermione pretended to be interested in something in the front corner but instead peeked sideways at Malfoy. He was pouring over a book and scribbling notes from it on a piece of parchment. As far as she could tell by the size and cover color, it was the textbook for this class, _Basic Healing Charms and When to Use Them_.

He was studying during class! What if the Professor actually said something important? She quelled her perturbation and started taking notes again, purposefully blocking out the sound of Malfoy's pen.

"The spells we've started talking about, Reperio Alica and Detectis Inaequalitas, as well as some basic spells to monitor vital signs will be the charms we will start on at the beginning of this semester. These will be studied and practiced within your lab groups. I would suggest practicing, at least initially, during school hours or within easy access of a wizarding hospital."

This caused a small stir among the students. Over the murmuring of her classmates Hermione strained to hear the next few sentences of the Professor.

"I have used your sitting arrangement to organize you into your lab groups," the Professor continued over the noise and waved her wand over the large board in front of the class. On it there were names arranged into clumps. Hermione's stomach clenched. "These groups will consist of five students that I have listed on the board, here. Feel free to come and look at them once class finishes. You will not need to meet officially until after next class period but I encourage to you to get to know your new lab group during the lunch break. Are there any questions?"

Hermione whispered "Oculi Accipitrem," and scanned the board with her stronger vision to find her name. Under a group labeled 'Alpha-Lambda' she found it, along with a name she didn't recognize, John Thomson, Shandra King, and Draco Malfoy.

She turned on him and whispered angrily, "this is all your fault!"

Malfoy looked up from his parchment and quirked his eyebrow. With the spell still in effect, she could see all the individual hair roots of that eyebrow. Disturbed, she cast a nonverbal 'Finite.'

"What are you on about Granger?"

"Because you decided to sit next to me, not only am I stuck with you in my group but Shandra as well!"

Malfoy grimaced at the board of names, "yes, it was part of my mastermind plan to get all of us stuck in a group together."

Ignoring his sarcasm, Hermione gathered her things and said sharply, "well, congratulations."

She heard him sigh, "Granger…"

"I cannot work with you for a whole semester. I'm sure the Professor will understand." She picked Professor Greythorn out of the crowd of students leaving for lunch break and started prepping her arguments as she shuffled past John and Shandra.

"Shit, Granger, wait!" Malfoy called behind her.

* * *

AN: Thanks to the those who have left comments and kudos! :)

I want to improve my writing abilities and I'm a bit lost as to whats working and whats not so I would REALLY REALLY appreciate some feedback- even if it is critical. Thanks for reading :)


	4. In which blood is discussed

She ignored him and started walking down the aisle against the student traffic. It was easier for her to slip between the students because of her smaller size, and thus made it hard for Malfoy to catch up with her. Once she reached the front of the classroom, the students thinned considerably. Professor Greythorn was still standing at the front, talking with two students.

Malfoy caught her arm as she waited for the other students to finish.

"Why are you trying to stop me?" she asked as he smoothed his hair and robe.

He scoffed, "I'm not trying to stop you. I just don't want you to mention my _status_," he dropped his voice on the last word, "in front of the other students."

She raised her eyebrows as she tried to figure out why he was so anal about this.

"I thought you might be angry enough to forget or maybe this was a good enough 'reason' for you." He actually sounded anxious.

"What is wrong with you, Malfoy?" Hermione asked, completely serious. He winced. "Fine, I will keep your _dirty_ little secret," she smiled at her irony. Malfoy didn't seem to appreciate it, though.

Hermione moved closer and caught the last part of Professor Greythorn's conversation. "... I understand your desire as a couple to not be separated. However, I find it very unprofessional to bring personal matters into school work. I'm sure you can find other times to be together." Hermione felt a sense of foreboding at the Professor's prim tone.

The couple exchanged pained glances and brushed past Hermione, whispering to each other unhappily. She almost lost her courage altogether.

"Er, Professor?"

"Yes?" the woman turned her eyebrows raised expectantly and her lips pursed like she tasted lemons.

"Er, he and I have been placed in the same group but we have a very long unpleasant history together. Both of our school work would be hurt if we worked together. Would you please allow one of us to switch groups with that couple who just spoke to you?" Hermione was dismayed at how feeble all her arguments sounded spoken out loud.

"Ms., by your accent, I assume you are from England?"

"... yes?"

"I hope this aversion is not rooted in blood prejudices?"

"Uh…" Hermione debated how to dodge such a direct question.

"I will let you know we do not tolerate prejudice here. If you will not work with this man because he is muggle born then I would suggest you seriously reconsider your ethical code."

"What? No!" Hermione was completely blindsided. "I mean, its nothing like that, Professor. We just have… irreconcilable differences."

"Hhm," the Professor did not sound convinced. Where was all that Malfoy persuasion when it would actually be helpful? "So then this is merely a childish rivalry rooted in grade school?"

She thought about mentioning seventh year, but she couldn't justify that to herself. Ron had always said she was too soft-hearted. Unconsciously, she rubbed her left forearm, fingers sliding over the faint scar.

"Professor," Malfoy cut in. "It wasn't really a rivalry… I bullied her. I was cruel. She shouldn't have to study with me."

Hermione stared at Malfoy with her mouth slightly open.

"Hmm…" the Professor mused. "It seems like you have matured since then."

Malfoy opened his mouth and then closed it without saying anything, pressing his lips together.

"I think you should stay in the same group. It will give both of you a chance to practice your professional behavior," Professor gave both of them a pointed stare and then walked away from them back to her desk.

"Look Hermione... about, you know. I-," he grimaced, his expression reminding her of the conflicted one she saw on his face in the manor during the war. Unbidden, Bellatrix's high maniacal laugh echoed in her head. She winced, trying to ignore the sharp pain that now pierced her left arm. Her heart rate was speeding up and her palms were already sweaty. She was familiar with this pattern and knew what was coming next.

"Sod off, Malfoy," she said, not looking at him, knowing only her eyes would give her distress away. She hoped this would put him off of this 'good will' and stop him from following her as she walked purposefully away. She focused on keeping her breath as normal as possible as she hunted down the closest loo and locked herself in it. Her tight control slipped at the click of the lock and sobs choked in her chest, escaping in rattling gasps, ugly and painful. She sank onto the loo and slumped against the stall wall, biting her fist to muffle herself.

This was absurd, she thought, why had this affected her so strongly? He had been nearly civil to her ever since they met this morning, despite still being extremely annoying. She had thought leaving Europe would allow her to avoid anything that triggered these attacks until she managed to get them under control. Apparently fate had other plans. She sighed, wiping her eyes on loo paper, and blew her nose. She cast a 'frigus' to cool her eyes and nose and decrease their redness. She watched the shadows under the door to see if anyone was outside and cast a 'Homenum Revelio' just to be sure, even while knowing it was a tad paranoid.

Exiting the stall, she checked her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were a little bloodshot, but overall it was hard to tell she had been crying. Her hair had gotten a little out of control, probably because of some accidental magic. She pulled some of it back with a barrette she had in her bag to disguise it a little. She had given up trying to manage her hair with magic, as it only seemed to make her hair frizz more.

By the time she left the loo, Hermione felt put together and had enough of an appetite to try whatever the school had served for lunch. She was relieved to be able to make a sandwich from what was left of the spread and find a table of students to sit with without seeing so much as glimpse of Malfoy. She began eating, savoring the sharp cheddar cheese in her sandwich.

When she went back to her seat for the afternoon lecture, Shandra and Malfoy were no longer there and she was able to share pleasant small talk with John. Although these lectures were very similar to the morning's, she passed the worst of it thinking of about when she returned home. They had only arrived in America the day before yesterday and so she had left the apartment in quite a bit of disarray. She wasn't sure she wanted to see how it had been sorted out when she got back, but was quite happy when classes ended for the day and she lined up after the other students to floo home.

* * *

From this point on, Fleurdelys21 has agreed to beta this story for me! So many thanks to the lovely Fleurdelys21 for catching all my stupid mistakes and helping me write this. *heart*

Thank you so much to those who have commented (and gave kudos) on this story!

This is where it starts taking some twists that I'm really curious what you think of. I hope you enjoyed it and please let me know what you think!


	5. In which creatures are discussed

The only fireplace in the apartment was in one of the bedrooms and so she was met by the piles of unpacked boxes scattered around an unmade bed when she flooed home. She distantly heard the sound of running water and made her way around the boxes to the front room. Bowls of water were crowding the counter-space of the kitchen and saw one of her favorite mugs brimming with water on the kitchen table. The floor was occupied by a fish tank, some pots, and their rubbish can: all full of water. The sound seemed to be coming from the bathroom.

"Luna?" Hermione called, hand over her wand pocket.

"Hermione, you're back?" Luna's high voice floated out from the bathroom.

Hermione relaxed a little and peaked her head into the bathroom. Luna was leaning over the bathtub with the faucet running full force. Water had splashed onto the bathroom floor and across Luna's neon yellow skirt. A curious green film floated on the puddles around the tub.

"What are you doing, Luna?" Hermione asked.

"Trying to attract Dabberblimps. They are fond of water, you know," Luna bent to shut off the water and a few strands of her long hair trailed down into the tub, slick with water.

"Oh, is this one of the creatures you're researching for your job?"

"No, but Web-toed Diricawls like to snack on Dabberblimps," Luna reached over to a few small packets that were sitting on the loo and grabbed a pinch of green substance from one of them. "The Web-toed Diricawls have a higher concentration in Boston because Dabberblimps have migrated here in Muggles' bottled water."

"Oh, well, have you seen any Web-toed Diricawls?" Hermione asked as Luna continued to add various amounts of the packets into whatever was sitting in the tub.

"Very briefly," Luna tossed her hair over her shoulder and pulled a bucket out of the bathtub, the green mixture flurried about in the swirling water. "He disappeared when I tried to get a photograph of him. They are shy creatures, much like Nargles and most magical creatures."

Hermione decided not to bring up a few of the beasts they had encountered in Hagrid's classes and settled on "Oh."

"The photo did not turn out well, but you can still see the Diricawl if you look closely," Luna gestured towards the sink. Hermione looked down to see a Wizard photo, its edges soaked with the green sludge. There was a momentary picture of a dodo before a splash of liquid filled the photo and the view swung upwards to the ceiling and part of Luna's earrings and hair.

"What happened when you were taking the photo?" Hermione asked very curiously.

"The Diricawl ran into one of the bowls, and tipped all of the contents onto himself and I," Luna said matter of factly. "He wasn't happy with me for getting him wet in the middle of his snack and disappeared after expressing that frustration thoroughly in Diricawl."

"You understand Diricawl?" Hermione asked hesitantly.

"No, but it's a very distinct honking sound, I'm sure you would recognize it if you heard it," Luna leaned down and stirred whatever she was concocting.

"Oh, um... do you think if we placed a few fish tanks in the spare bedroom it would have the same effect as the mass of dishes in our living room right now?" Hermione asked, thinking of the possibility of flying green sludge threatening her future mornings. "We could even set up the spare bedroom for your mazizoologist work."

Luna tipped her head, her purple carrot-like earrings jangling. "Yes, that would work. Three big ones would probably do the trick." Luna hefted the bucket and lugged it past Hermione into the front room. Luna then plonked it down between the rubbish can and a spaghetti pot, both full of the curious concoction.

"What else attracts the Diricawls and Dabber...blimps?"

"I've added the Dabberblimp's favorite mix of plant algae to the water containers," Luna airily gestured with her green-caked hands. Hermione was relieved that the green substance was something as relatively harmless as algae. "The Web-toed Diricawl is fond of darker areas like caves or the underside of bridges at night. I need to somehow keep the room dark even when the windows are open in the daytime."

"I think I have a book that mentioned a similar spell used for vampires. Gimme a minute… I think I know which box I packed it in." Hermione hurried off to the master bedroom. She was pretty sure she put it in the box of books about magical creatures. They had shrunk all the boxes when they were moving, but they hadn't yet engorgio-ed them all back to normal size. Now, she just had to find where that box had ended up.

She was sprawled across the unmade bed, absorbed in her book, when Luna tapped on her shoulder a while later.

"Yes, Luna?"

"The 'tellaphone' is ringing, Hermione. I got rid of the Fulmentrice pixies so it should be safe to use."

"Oh, thanks Luna..." Hermione muttered before she realized what Luna had said. "The telephone? Blast!" She quickly marked her place and sprang from the bed. She slid across the wood floor in her socks and weaved through the sundry water containers before making it to the wall phone. "Yes?" She said breathlessly, snatching the phone up as it rung again.

"There you are!" came Harry's voice over the phone. "I thought I might have the wrong number."

"No, I just got caught up in some reading and lost track of time."

"Why am I not surprised- prepping for class?"

"Actually, Luna is trying to attract some Diricawls and there was this spell I remembered-"

"Speaking of Luna, I think I've got this 'speakerphone' gadget working. Want to have it on both sides so Luna and the guys over here can join us?"

"Of course! You've got Ron and Ginny with you?" Hermione asked happily. "Luna! Harry is on the phone. Want to join us?"

Luna looked up from a measuring cup she had been filling. "Yes, I like talking with him," she smiled. Luna joined Hermione as Hermione played with the phone a little.

"There, can you hear us, Harry?"

"Hi, Harry!" Luna joined in.

"Yep, we hear you on our end. Nice to hear you, Luna!"

"Hey, Hermione. Luna," came Ron's voice. "Ginny's here too."

"Ron, I can tell them myself!" Ginny scolded. "Hi guys!"

They all exchanged greetings and Hermione felt herself relax a little.

"Anyways, what were you saying, Hermione?" Harry said.

"About Luna? Good news! She's on her first assignment!"

"Yes, I'm studying the Web-toed Diricawl. Rolf Scamander was quite impressed with my study of Wrackspurts and wanted me to join him. I like that he listens to my theories about rare magical creatures."

"Congratulations, Luna!" Harry said. "That's great!"

"Thank you, how is Auror training? I know Ron wanted to imitate your decision to be one."

Harry laughed a little awkwardly, "Yeah, Ron joined a little while back."

"Oi, I'm doing good. Don't make that face, Harry!"

"Of course, of course."

"He's black and blue!" Ginny chirped in. "He barely has the energy to eat when he gets home, and that's saying something!"

Hermione and Harry laughed.

"Oh, stop pouting, Ron," Harry continued. "He's doing great. It's quite a bit different than during the war, though. Seeing as we are hunting people down instead of just trying to hide from them for the most part."

"I went on my first mission yesterday," Ron quickly added in. "It felt good to help hunt down the bastards and lock them up. Say, Hermione, it'd be really great to have you with us. I'm sure you'd be bloody brilliant at it. You'd make sure they put them away for good."

"Sorry, Ron. I just started school. I'm going to be here for awhile."

"But you already know practically everything, Hermione. Why do you want to go to more school? You should use your skills with us, you are bloody scary with a wand. Why'd you ditch us anyway?"

"I like the school I'm going to and the creature Luna is researching traveled over to the Americas. It's the best place for both of us right now." Hermione looked over at Luna pleadingly.

"Have you guys play Quidditch recently?" Luna asked. "I liked commenting when the Gryffindor team played."

"Yeah, actually!" Ron said brightly.

"It's not the same without your commentary, though," Ginny added. "We got George to play as one of the seekers against Harry."

"Yeah, Harry won't let him win though."

"And why does Harry have to go easy on George?" Ginny asked hotly.

"Maybe because his twin just died? Harry's already soft on his girlfriend during the games, shouldn't be too hard."

"Ginny is on my team, how could I go easy on her, Ron?"

"Ron, stop being silly, going easy on George during a Quidditch game won't help him. Besides, isn't beating things up cathartic for boys?" Hermione asked.

"Er…" Ron paused.

"Yes," Luna joined. "George might be able to vent some of his pain through the violence inherent in Quidditch."

"Oh, you're brilliant! Harry, we've got to get George as a seeker or something else that gets smashed a lot."

"No no! I do not condone mauling your brother, Ron! Some friendly competition is good, but everyone is hurt enough as it is," Hermione jumped in.

"Yeah, that's why we need you back here, Hermione, everyone is hurt."

"Ron, we've already gone over this."

"I don't see why you left- why you left me."

"I need some time to work things out by myself. Maybe this is a good time to help George around the shop. He-he probably needs it. Or how about your mum. How is she doing?"

As the other line went quiet, Hermione knew she said something wrong.

"We all miss Fred. George isn't the same without him. It's been hard for everyone without them causing chaos everywhere," Ginny said. There was shuffling and a disgusted huff. Hermione imagined Harry putting his arm around Ginny and Ron glaring at them. It had been a pretty frequent occurrence right before she left.

"I'm sorry, you guys."

"We know it's been hard for you too, Hermione. And you, Luna."

"Yes, the Wrackspurts have been heavy with all of us lately." Luna agreed. "My father has been using the siphon quite frequently, but thoughts from the war keep attracting them. He is trying to form groups that meet and work together to help dispel the plague of Wrackspurts within the Wizarding community."

"That's really good of him, Luna," Ginny said, she sounded subdued. Hermione nodded her agreement but didn't feel up to adding anything. The mood had sobered quickly.

"It's pretty late over there isn't it?" Luna added. "We're all pretty vulnerable to Wrackspurts right now. We should go bed early and talk some other time when there aren't so many around us."

"Yeah, good idea, Luna," Harry agreed. "Good night Luna, Hermione."

"Talk to you guys later," Hermione replied.

After a chorus of goodbyes Hermione hung up the phone.

"Luna," Hermione sighed, "Was coming out here a good idea?"

"Don't pay attention to the Wrackspurts in your head. Come with me outside, I hear there is a good ice cream parlor on the way to the fish store."

"Actually, that sounds amazing. Thanks Luna." Hermione rubbed her eyes and replaced the phone on its hook. The weather was still pleasant outside so Hermione only went to hunt down her shoes.

* * *

I love Luna so I had to find some excuse to get her in the story ;) Thank you guys for your continued support! -Sam


	6. Introduction of alpha-lambda

The rest of the week went a lot more smoothly than that first day. Once the Professors got off of their soap boxes, the classes actually started to get interesting. Hermione found herself quickly getting buried in schoolwork, especially with all of the extra studying she felt was necessary. She had taken up studying biochemistry in the mornings to supplement what they were studying in physiology. She felt like she had more catching up to do on the hard science front than her American classmates, a familiar feeling from her early Hogwarts days.

An alarm alerted her she need to go grab breakfast before school. Luna was already in the kitchen eating a bowl of pudding. The green sludge had yet to make any reappearances outside of the spare room, for which Hermione was grateful. Hermione poured herself some tea from the teapot she had put on earlier and put some bread in the toaster.

"Morning, Luna," she called as she sorted through their fruit bowl for an edible piece of fruit.

"Morning, I would be careful of the bananas, it seems like they've attracted too many fruit pixies."

Hermione pulled out a very ripe banana from the bottom of the bowl. "Hm… I guess you're right," she agreed then decided on a gala apple as a safer choice. She spread jam on her toast and joined Luna at the table. "You came in rather late last night, how'd it go?"

Luna licked her spoon and turned it in her hand as she talked. "Well, Rolf said we should try when things were quiet and dark…so we were out pretty late," Luna paused and looked off into the distance. "We actually got a very good picture and some new information but Rolf was acting a little odd."

Hermione wondered what could possibly be considered odd to Luna. She opened her mouth to ask but Luna suddenly stood up from the table.

"Well, we've got a lot to get done before the weekend. Enjoy school, Hermione, I'm sure you will." With a 'scourgify' directed at her dish, Luna floated out of the kitchen. Hermione finished her breakfast, puzzling over her unvoiced question.

She arrived at school early enough to get everything in order and sat in what had come to be her normal spot. John joined her right before the professor began her lecture. He always managed to slide in right before the lecture began, leaving Hermione miffed and impressed at the same time. She had gotten used to this routine and so smiled at his friendly greeting before immersing herself in the rest of the day's lecture.

During the break, John leaned over and asked, "What's the difference between the _flare corde_ and _signum vitalis_ spells?"

Hermione breezed into an explanation and then stopped as she saw his face and settled for a shorter answer.

"Fundamentally, _signum vitalis_ encompasses _flare corde_ as well as other spells such as _qualitas anima_. It's a general spell used to rule out the body's vital systems as the source of the ailment."

"Ah, makes sense," he nodded and leaned back into his chair. Hermione could never tell if he meant it.

The next class was their first lab class from Professor Greythorn. The professor started by reviewing the spell that they had been talking about in lecture. She asked a relatively simple question from the reading but the class sat silently. Hermione sat on her hands and counted several seconds before compulsively raising her hand.

"Yes, miss?"

"The _signum vitalis_ monitors the signals sent in and out of the medulla oblongata to determine irregularities in breathing, heart rate, and blood pressure."

"Exactly."

Hermione felt the thrill of a small victory run through her but it was quickly quenched when the professor announced soon after that they would be splitting up into their lab groups. The class abruptly became chaos once they were told to meet their groups.

"Can you see anything?" she asked John.

"Like our lab group?" John shrugged. "We could just wait it out."

Hermione thought that Malfoy was probably waiting for everyone to try and find him. Therefore, that probably wouldn't pan out so well.

"What was our group name?" she asked John. "Alpha-Lambda?"

"Um…" John flipped through his disorganized folder. "Yeah, an A and an upside-down V."

Hermione nodded and climbed up onto her desk.

"Woah, what are you doing?" John exclaimed, adopting a wide stance and holding his hands.

"This," Hermione wrote the symbols Alpha and Lambda in the air with her wand. They stayed glowing afterwards in a pale yellow light.

"Oh, well that's a good idea. Here, let me help you down," John reached out with his hand and Hermione took it as she stepped down.

"Er, thank you," Hermione wanted to tell him that she could manage a less than a metre drop but was also pleased by his gallantry. Ron had never acted like that.

"Hey, look," John pointed. Someone else had traced their group name into the air. "You're so smart everybody is using your idea," he turned and smiled at her.

Hermione, used to that compliment, was only taken back by how often he could flash that winning smile at her. "Th-Thanks."

She looked away, feeling the colour in her cheeks, when her eyes met Malfoy's as he was walking down the aisle towards her. She froze.

He met her with a cold stare then turned his attention to John. Malfoy greeted him with his self assured smile and started up a little small talk she hadn't known he was capable of. She turned to Shandra uncertainly but Shandra was waving at someone behind her. Hermione looked over her shoulder to see who it was. A tall but sturdily built young man in muggle clothes smiled and waved back.

"Daryn! It's so nice to see you again!" Shandra called.

"So this is the alpha-lambda group?" he asked, his voice lyrical but not quite as deep as she had been expecting.

"Yes, so you know John already and here's Draco." Shandra proceeded to introduce him to the other group members. "And here's Hermione," Shandra's voice lost all of its enthusiasm.

"Granger. I'm Hermione Granger." Hermione corrected.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Daryn Williams," he replied formally. "I'm sorry, are you The Hermione Granger?"

Hermione gulped. "Yes, the one in the papers. Er, where are you from?" She hurriedly changed the topic.

"Mostly Virginia."

"That's south of here right?" Hermione asked, her geography not as perfect as she'd like.

"Yes, a few states down. Not too much a commute, and it's nice to come up here and be closer to the hum of the wizarding community."

"Anyways… did you check it out like I told you?" Shandra interrupted.

"The wizard's music cafe?" Daryn asked. "Yes, it was certainly interesting. There were a few alternative and jazz musicians I enjoyed."

"Yeah, not like those stuffy stuck up pureblood clubs right? They're so self righteous about being soooo better than all of us 'lesser' wizards but have horrible taste in music. It's disgusting, really," Shandra slid her hand onto Daryn's arm. Hermione glanced over at Malfoy to see his reaction, but he hadn't seemed to hear the conversation.

"I wouldn't go that far," Daryn stated diplomatically, "but their music is a bit stale."

"That's so great, we should totally go together some time! I haven't been there in forever."

Hermione played with her wand and glanced between the two groups that were still chatting. Wouldn't groups of four or six had made more sense, she thought. "Er, guys? Anyone have a good idea for how we should practice together?" She asked.

John and Malfoy paused in the conversation, but only John looked up. Daryn cleared his throat as Shandra continued talking.

"The spell isn't too complicated so two people could practice on the same person, but since we are relatively unpracticed at this spell there is always the possibility of negative side effects from our magic interacting," she babbled.

"How about I team up with you and watch you practice on Draco?" asked John.

"Um… or maybe Daryn?" Hermione interrupted quickly. "And then Draco and Shandra can team up as well." She silently prayed that everyone would agree.

John just shrugged. Daryn took in the purposeful non-eye contact between more than half the group and said, "Sure, that sounds like it would work out great."

Hermione sighed in relief.

* * *

AN: Can I continue to sing the praises of my beta reader? I will cause shes amazing. :) Thank you thank you for the reviews! They really are encouraging! House points for all!

If there are any anatomists or you know, people who actually know the human body well- I apologize if my cobbled together psudeo-healer-science is completely unbelievable and feel free to give me pointers. ;)


	7. Signum Vitalis

"Have either of you practiced this spell by yourselves?" Hermione asked of the two young men once everyone and settled into their spots. Daryn nodded and John shook his head. "Er… okay. How comfortable do you feel with it, Daryn?"

"Well, I've only practiced it on my little sister's familiar but it seemed to work on it."

"On your sister's familiar?" John snorted.

"Oh, I see you've volunteered to be my first human subject?" Daryn countered.

"Ah-hem."

Hermione looked up to see Professor Greythorn with a cage of mice.

"Which group is this?" asked the professor.

"Alpha-Lambda," Hermione answered helpfully.

"I see, here are the mice you will practice on before any spells on human subjects are attempted."

Hermione glanced at Daryn but his face was impassive. The professor opened the cage and distributed a mouse to each of the group members.

"I will demonstrate the spell, and each of you will attempt to copy me." Professor Greythorn pointed her wand at Hermione's mouse and with a quiver and a flick of her wand she pronounced "Sig-noom vee-tal-iss" the s hissing between her teeth. It didn't sound very comforting.

"Well?" Professor Greythorn asked. "Questions?"

"Does the s have to be hard during the pronunciation?" Hermione asked.

The professor looked down at her nose at Hermione and huffed, "Not that I know of. You can use your practice time to discover the answer. Well, go on." The professor gestured to Hermione.

Hermione took that as a cue to practice and so she turned and focused on her mouse. Holding her wand trained on the small target of the mouse's head, she tried to mimic the professor's wand and voice. "_Signum vitalis_!" She saw a yellow-green glow around the mouse's head which quickly faded.

"I see a green colour but humans should be in the blue toned range. I assume animals have different normal colour ranges than humans," Hermione turned to the professor.

"Correct," the professor promptly turned her eyes on the others. "Go ahead."

Daryn and Malfoy both performed the spell with very little comment from the professor. Shandra forgot the quiver of the wand the first time, but she grasped it on the second try. However, John was still struggling with the pronunciation after a few tries.

"Help him," Professor Greythorn instructed briefly and moved onto the next group.

Hermione turned to John who shrugged with an ingratiating smile.

"You've almost got it right," Hermione encouraged. "You just need to pronounce signum with an -oom instead of an -um."

"Or you could sing it, like this sig-nOM vi-TAL-is." Daryn added, singing the spell in a clear tenor.

"Y-you could," agreed Hermione.

"Using a tune always helps me remember how to the pronounce a spell. It saved my butt in cram school," Daryn explained.

John laughed dryly, "Okay, -om not -um. Sig-nOM vi-TAL-iss." He copied Daryn's tune but his singing was breathy and a tad strained.

Hermione ignored this and smiled encouragingly.

John turned to his desk, but his mouse had disappeared.

"_Accio_ John's mouse." Hermione said and the mouse flew towards her from under one of the desks. Once John's mouse and been returned, he proceeded to practice the spell using the sing-song tone.

He blinked. "I saw something," he said cheerfully. "Now I can practice-" he turned towards Hermione with his wand raised and Hermione automatically raised her own.

"Er, not yet," she interrupted quickly. John quirked his eyebrow and Hermione explained further. "You need to get your wand-work down a little better before I let you point a wand at me," she added a smile to hopefully soften the blow.

She watched his face flash through two consecutive expressions before he smiled and turned to the mouse again.

"Here, I'll show you," Daryn offered. He proceeded to explain the wand movements more in depth and Hermione glanced up to see how the other two in their group were doing. She was surprised to see that Shandra was already practicing on Malfoy, her wand pointed directly at his forehead. When she looked closer, she saw Malfoy's wand resting in his hand, hidden under the table. That seemed a lot more accurate. They switched then, with Draco openly pointing his wand at the girl's head. Hermione watched, fascinated by how relaxed Shandra seemed to be under his wand. Malfoy's eyes flicked over in her direction and Hermione quickly re-focused on what Daryn was saying.

"Here, I'll show you on Hermione."

"Woah, what?" she asked, panicked. "Let me see you do it on the mouse one more time to make sure everything is okay."

"Wow, Hermione," John said jokingly. "You don't seem very comfortable on the receiving end of a wand. I wonder if its because you're-"

"There's nothing wrong with wanting to be safe," Hermione cut in. A flash of realization lit Daryn's brown eyes.

"Don't worry," he assured. "Watch, I've got it down." He executed a perfect spell on his mouse.

"Okay. You do have it down," Hermione agreed reluctantly but still felt her breathing hitch as he pointed his wand towards her. Nobody had had to point a wand at her for a long time and she hadn't realized until just now that it would affect her so strongly. Too many times she had been staring down a malicious wand point. Too many times to try to block all of them out of her brain. Don't think about it, don't think about it, she chanted to herself. Deciding to follow Malfoy's suite, she gripped her wand in a way easy to throw a 'protego' from.

"Don't worry," Daryn repeated, with a hint of the tone you used on small animals or scared children. She wished he would just get it over with. He was taking long enough as it was, and her mind was slowing things down on top of it. Her breathing became a little ragged as her control slipped and she knew her heart was beating too fast. She watched Daryn's wand bob and trace in a perfect arc as he sang in his beautiful voice, "_Signum vitalis_!"

Her head buzzed in a foreign way, but the sensation quickly lifted. She did a mental inventory as discretely as possible. Everything seemed fine. He had only done the one spell, which had seemed to have gone perfectly.

"Huh," Daryn muttered, leaning over their textbook. He pointed to one of the hues and said, "I'm pretty sure this was the color I saw. It says that this is a little high for a human of your size. I wonder if I did it correctly?"

"Oh, I'm pretty sure you did," Hermione said as offhandedly as possible. They exchanged another look and Hermione wondered exactly what he was thinking and how much he guessed. He's probably a good person, she tried to reassure herself. You've seen both of his forearms, he's not a Death Eater. "There was this buzz in my head when you cast the spell," she continued, trying to distract herself. "I was thinking it could be I felt the disruption of the nerve impulses when your spell hit them. I wonder if that has anything to do with the colors? Maybe the sodium or potassium trigger part of the colors?" Really, now, she was just throwing out random things to block out her thoughts.

"You mean I have to memorize what all these colors mean?" John asked with a laugh. "I didn't sign up to be an interior decorator."

"Being a healer requires finesse just like any other artist. Only for a healer, the orchestra is the the body and each of the systems sings in a different instrument's voice."

"Uh, huh. Sure," John said, quirking his eyebrow. It seemed like Daryn was a frustrated musician. Good, music was safe. She imagined Daryn sitting and playing a violin with the sunlight golden on his dark brown skin. Safe, sunlight, happy. She held onto the image with a fiery will and started to get a headache from her clenched jaw.

"Well I'm going to see how those two are doing," John said and got up to wander over to Shandra and Draco. He started chatting and Hermione turned and looked back at Daryn.

"I guess its my turn?" she asked, falsely cheery.

* * *

AN: Hopefully this doesn't feel like a filler chapter. I got excited about the spells and stuff and before I realized it I had taken a whole chapter on the lab class. Do you guys find it boring or is it okay? I would love the feedback. And... this story just hit over 10,000 words. Kinda exciting :) Many thanks! (and of course to my lovely beta) Cheers!


	8. In which there are many discussions

"Harry!" she called his name desperately when he finally picked up. Once class got out, she had burst out onto the muggle streets and had quickly dialed him on the nearest payphone.

"Hermione? What's the matter?"

"It's not working, my plan isn't working. This is the second episode I've had in a week!"

"Calm down. Tell me what happened."

"He pointed a wand at me."

"Who?"

"Williams, he's a classmate."

"Why?"

"We were practicing a spell for class."

"And you panicked?" Harry asked patiently.

"Yes, it wasn't that bad but I'm going to have a wand pointed at me at least once a week, maybe more. I can't freak out like this every time!"

"It's okay, you'll get used to it," Harry soothed.

"Things aren't getting better, though, Harry. I thought things would change!"

"Well, you've researched it, haven't you. What do the books say?"

"Pills and therapy."

"Then why don't you do that?"

"But why didn't you do that Harry, you went through worse than I did."

"Hermione, you were tortured." She winced. "You need to talk about this with someone and since you refuse to talk to Ron or your parents about it, you need to talk about this with someone else."

"I-I can't," Hermione begged into the phone. "I can't talk about it. Especially not on the phone or in front of Luna. Harry-"

"Then go to a therapist, but you can't avoid this forever. It's just going to keep haunting you until you confront it."

"I can't talk to a muggle about this, Harry. They'll try to get information about my attackers and- and-"

"Then find a wizard therapist. There's got to be at least one in all of the Americas and probably one within apparating range, too."

"I'm not crazy, Harry. I don't want to talk to a shrink who will try to practice some pseudo-magic on me like horoscopes or crystal balls or force me to take several pills a day. I'm fine! Not crazy!" A passer by gave her a funny look and Hermione muttered quieter, "I'm not crazy."

"Hermione, I know you don't like this idea and you'll be able to find a thousand reasons not to, but you can just say no if you don't like them. Just give it a chance, please."

Hermione hesitated.

"Look, if nothing else, just do it for my peace of mind. You don't have to do anything other than make an appointment and go into the office. That's it. Please," Harry was begging and Hermione felt awful now for piling all her problems on him.

"Yeah, sorry Harry. I can do that. I'll do it tonight."

"Good girl," Harry's voice was considerably less tense.

"Um… anyway," Hermione wiped her eyes. "How are things with you and Ginny?"

Silence reigned on the other side of the phone.

"Er, Harry? Did I say something wrong?"

"Uh… no, nothing's wrong. It's just… I'm a little worried about something. Oh, that's Ginny at the floo. I'll talk to you about it later, okay?"

"Sure, Harry. Whenever you need to, just let me know. I'll talk to you guys on Sunday."

"Okay, sure that's good. Thanks. And Hermione? Find a therapist, okay?"

"Yes, Harry," Hermione made a face at the phone. They said their goodbyes and after she hung up Hermione mentally calculated how much she had just spent on the phone call. She winced. "That is where having mental breakdowns gets you," she muttered to herself.

...

Draco was distracted from his conversation with Shandra and John when Granger abruptly clonked her backpack on the desk she had been sitting at.

"Ah, well, this was good," she yammered as she hurriedly packed her bag. "Er.. see you guys tomorrow!" she yelled over her shoulder and she raced to get ahead of the other students. As she ran she somehow managed to slip out of her robes and pull on a muggle jacket and scarf. She was shoving the robe into her backpack as she disappeared out the door.

Her distracted behavior reminded him of the first day of class when she had brushed him off so coldly. Maybe, it wasn't just him? He got up and walked over to Daryn.

"Does she normally act like that?" Draco asked offhandedly.

"Hm?" Daryn looked up and raised his eyebrows.

"Granger, does she normally end conversations with a barely veiled desire to escape as fast as possible?"

"Well, I just met her today so I don't think I'm qualified to answer that," Daryn replied. "Why do you ask?"

Draco's mind stumbled for a fitting response. "I just remember her being a teacher's pet back at Hogwarts so it's a surprise to see her scrambling to get out of a classroom so quickly."

"Mmh… so you went to school with her?"

"We weren't on a first name basis, but it's not like here where everyone and their dog decides it's okay to call you by your first name." Draco huffed in irritation. It was still grating to have everybody calling him 'Draco.' It was like they were assuming they were good friends even though they had just barely met. When it first started he had been sorely tempted to avada someone, well, at least rant in his head about avada-ing someone.

"Well you would probably understand how she feels better than anyone here, right?"

Draco gave him a funny look. "Understand what?"

"Since you were in England when it happened," Daryn said in tone the implied he should know whatever he was blabbering on about.

Draco decided to just use a look that implied what he thought of Daryn's senseless chatter rather than attempt to actually try to respond to this idiocy.

"Hey Draco!"

Draco rolled his eyes, "Yes, Shandra?"

"We're going to go have lunch this weekend at the wizard cafe I was talking about. Care to join us?"

"Actually, I've got plans," Draco didn't care to elaborate.

"Aw, come on man," John coerced. "All four of us could go, it would be fun!"

Draco hesitated. He didn't actually look forward to spending most of the day by himself or wandering around pretending he wasn't alone.

"I really do have something around noon. It would have to be another time if I were to join you," he didn't want them to think he was actually interested in such silly things, so he left the inflection out of his voice.

…

Hermione still felt out of sorts even though Harry had helped her calm down quite a bit. She rummaged up her things from the payphone and decided to go for a nice walk first. It ended up being a rather long walk because the sky was beautiful and she got caught up in the bustle of the city, but by the end of it she was feeling refreshed and ready to hit the books for the rest of the day. She returned to the school to use their library as it was the most useful and comfortable spot. She had just gotten into the swing of studying when a voice drawled behind her.

"There's the Granger I know: nose always stuck in her book."

Hermione didn't bothering looking up, "Sod off, Malfoy."

"What happened earlier?" he continued as if she hadn't said anything, "Weaselbee and Pothead have a crisis?"

Hermione debated casting a 'silencio' but assumed that it would quickly escalate into a full scale wand duel and she would lose her dear studying oasis. She compromised with a 'muffliato' directed at herself and happily settled back into reading. It didn't take long before he was waving his hands in front of her. Irritated she cast a 'finite' and turned on him.

"What do you want?" she bit out.

"Did you cast that _muffliato_ at yourself?"

"Yes, Malfoy, congratulations! Now say whatever it is you are so _desperate_ to tell me and then leave. Me. Alone. Some people actually use the library to study," she hissed.

"You wound me, Granger," he mockingly put his hand against his chest.

She rolled her eyes and waited.

He paused and stared into her eyes with what seemed like a sincere expression. "Granger, being a _muggleborn_, you know what these muggle professions like doctor, dentist, and uh… therapist mean?"

Hermione sighed irritably. "They all have definitions in the back of our Wizarding and Muggle Professions book. They're for this exact purpose and all are written out clearly so _your kind_ can understand it," she didn't bother controlling her sarcasm.

"What's stuck up your-"

"Shut it, Malfoy."

"I thought the little know-it-all liked helping people study?"

"Go read your book, Malfoy." She turned back to her own reading and recast the 'muffliato' spell. She finished her study session without any further interruptions except the librarian when he shook her shoulder to tell her the school was closing.

* * *

A/N: I had a rough time with this and the next chapter. Many thanks to my beta who patiently stuck with me through it and gave me lots of advice. We finally made it!

And... Draco appeared earlier than I expected. Happy Birthday? Hope you guys enjoy the chapter!

As always, I would love to hear what you guys think: like or dislike. Many thanks! Especially to my consistent reviewers *hugs*


	9. Hermione travels to Wizarding NYC

The following day was Friday and she spent a good deal of her breaks absently debating on how to follow Harry's advice. There wasn't really a wizarding yellow pages, at least that she knew of, so she had to figure out a different discrete way of finding a wizard therapist. Maybe she could ask a professor under the guise of professional curiosity? She'd rather not have anyone know about her trying to find a therapist, but, since it was still early in her scholastic career here, Hermione figured that the incident would be quickly forgotten. When nothing better came to her the remainder of the day, Hermione resolved to ask her Professor after classes.

Once they ended Hermione distractedly packed her things, rehearsing the white lies she would feed her professor.

"Oh, Hermione, I just remembered something," John said as he finished packing his own things.

"Yes?"

"Shandra found a cool cafe we're going to check out. Want to come?"

"Erm, Shandra and you?"

"No, it's our whole lab group. We had to move it to two o'clock because Draco already had plans at noon. Probably some hot chick."

"Hmm," Hermione replied noncommittally.

"Don't worry, I can totally be your wingman if you are interested in him. I'm pretty good."

"Malfoy?" Hermione gagged. "That foul little- ...I mean. He appeals to me about as much as a ferret shedding in my soup. That," Hermione shivered involuntarily. "Please don't disturb me by ever mentioning that ever again."

"Ooookay, no worries. I guess he just isn't your cup of tea?" John grinned expectantly. Hermione figured he might have made a joke and smiled obligingly.

"Well, we'll be at the Tuneful Brew in wizarding New York," John replied as he started down the aisle. "See you there!" he waved and then headed for the door.

"Er…" Hermione's protest was left on her tongue. She sighed and thought, things couldn't go too badly, right? Shouldering her bag, she continued to the professor's offices, figuring Professor Nightingale was her best bet.

Professor Nightingale was the older man who had led the students to the lecture hall the first day. In class he seemed interested in helping his students beyond just the grades and curriculum of the classroom. Arriving, she knocked on his door.

He opened his door and peered down his glasses at her.

"Professor, I'm Hermione Granger. I'm taking your Collaboration with Wizarding and Muggle Health Professionals class."

"Ah, come in dear, did you have a question?" the older man left the door cracked and ambled back to his desk.

"Yes, I was really fascinated by your lecture yesterday about how many different branches there were in the wizard medical field. I was wondering if you had a list of all the different wizard health professionals in the area? Being muggle-born, I haven't had too much experience with these things and would like to go visit them over the weekend."

"Oh," the professor seemed pleased and Hermione started to feel guilty. She really was going to visit some of the list, she reasoned with herself. "Just a moment, I can make a list for you of the ones I know."

"Thank you very much, professor," she said primly.

Hermione waited as the professor scratched out a list on a piece of scroll. When he was finished, he handed it to her saying, "Some of these have decided to work in the muggle world, but they do wizarding work on the side. Normally on the weekends so you're in luck. I left the information you need to access their wizarding services."

"Thank you again, professor," she said sincerely. "You have been a great help."

"Yes, have a good weekend, dear," he called as she left his office.

She waved goodbye and walked back down the hall, figuring she could get a few hours of studying in before she had dinner with Luna.

...

After some light studying Saturday morning, she plotted out her path for the rest of the day on a map of New York so she could efficiently visit the majority of the relevant names on the Professor's list. She was actually surprised by how many names the professor had listed under 'counseling.' Grabbing some breakfast, she left the house to walk to her first destination. There was a slight drizzle but the sky was still a clear blue. She was working up to a pretty good mood until she saw her destination. She stopped short.

"That can't be right," she muttered to herself and double checked her map.

Faded and tasseled curtains covered the windows, a hand-printed sign rested outside with a large hand drawn in the middle, and the words 'Psychic and Tarot Reader' glowed faintly in neon lettering from the window. She paused and rubbed her head gently. Maybe it's just a front, she reasoned with herself, just hiding in plain sight. Taking a deep breath as she shouldered her bag, she opened the door and pushed aside the heavy velvet curtain covering the door.

The room was dark and Hermione waited for her eyes to readjust. "Hello?" she called.

"Welcome, my child," a voice floated from the back.

A woman swept out and turned on a lamp with a stained-glass cover. By it's tinted light Hermione determined that the woman was probably wearing dress robes in some jewel tone.

"I'm your psychic, Serena." Hermione groaned in her head, laying it on a bit thick wasn't she?

"Er…" Hermione thought back to the password that the professor gave her. "I seek, er, 'praecantatio' of the counseling variety?"

"Ah, a witch is it?" the woman gestured towards the two seats around a circular table. "Sit down, I'll make some tea and we can talk."

"Erm, I know this will be a bit uncouth, but how much are your counseling sessions?"

"Oh, I charge two sickles a minute, I assure you its a very competitive price," the woman said as disappeared into the back again.

The pricing method seemed a little odd, but she hadn't done this sort of thing before, she reasoned again. Hermione did some quick mental calculations and winced when she realized it was nearly eighteen pounds for half an hour. To make sure she kept it short, she set a fifteen minute timer on her watch and took a seat.

Serena returned with two cups of tea on saucers and placed one in front of Hermione. Serena sat across from her and then waited, glancing down at the tea cup. She supposed that Serena was waiting for her to drink the tea. She hesitantly lifted it to her lips and inhaled it's steam. She couldn't detect anything malicious or any flavors strong enough to mask them. She decided it was probably fine to drink. It was surprisingly pleasant.

"That's rather good," she said for the woman's benefit. Seemingly satisfied, the woman nodded and settled in.

"Now, what's the nature of your problem, child?"

"Er… I'm from England and was part of the… war," she took a nervous sip.

"Yes?"

"Well, I've had trouble with dreams and remembering things at bad times. I think I've got PTSD or maybe some sort of anxiety problem?" Hermione offered, a little rushed. Those were her best guesses from the research she had done.

"Tell me about these dreams," Serena prompted and sipped her tea again.

Almost automatically, Hermione followed suit. "Er, they're mostly flashbacks to what happened back then. Though sometimes my brain spits out the craziest dreams-"

"Do you remember them?"

Hermione hesitated, a familiar nagging about this whole situation. She swallowed more tea as she considered. You promised Harry, part of her whispered, he said you'd try to find ways to get out of this. She sighed and continued, "Well, the setting changes but a lot of the time its in Hogwarts and someone's chasing me and just as I get onto one of the moving staircases it will just disappear underneath me and as I start to fall I wake up. Just normal nightmares, really."

"Hm… do you remember any more details from these dreams?"

"I don't see why it matters," Hermione muttered into her tea cup. "I'm not really bothered by those dreams as much as everything else." She noticed that all that was left were the dregs, so she put her cup down.

"These things will help me get a better reading."

"Reading?" Hermione asked incredulously, the warning bells now very clear in her head. "But I thought-"

"I see you're done with your tea." The woman reached out and took Hermione's cup from in front of her.

"Er, this is a counseling session, right? Not divination. I didn't come for a psychic reading."

The woman was looking intently at the dregs of her tea cup.

"Hmm… I see a snake or perhaps a circle? No… a circle around the snake. Do you see it, child?" Serena held them the cup out to Hermione.

Hermione reflexively jerked backwards bringing up her hand to push away whatever the woman was trying to show her. "I have no interest in that rubbish!" She exclaimed angrily. When her hand hit the tea cup, it tilted and spilled it's dregs down her shirt. Immediately afterwards, her watch timer started beeping incessantly.

"Oh dear, let me get a rag for that, child."

Hermione roughly turned off her watch. "Honestly, stop calling me that, I'm not a child!" she muttered angrily at the retreating figure. Is she really a witch, she thought, I can just magic it off. She directed her wand to her shirt. "Tergeo!" Nothing happened. "Scourgify! Evanesco! Purgo!" The stain remained.

"Oh, child, that won't work. I bought this specific tea because it is immune to most enchantments. It makes my readings more accurate and less likely to be tampered with."

Hermione snorted incredulously but still expressed her gratitude when Serena gave her the wet rag. Hermione carefully dabbed up most of it, but there was still a light reddish-brown stain running down her front. She felt any semblance of a good mood draining out of her.

"So, thirty sickles." She stated, rather than asked. She fished a galleon and thirteen sickles out of her purse and dumped them onto the witch's table.

"You don't want to hear your reading?"

"I came here for counseling, not that imprecise magic you call divination," Hermione bit out.

"The fates can bring guidance to those lost to their own course," Serena said very sincerely.

Hermione barely forced a smile and turned to leave. As her hand pushed aside the curtain, the woman called, "You seek to use your pride to hide from what haunts you but, you must face it in order to find the love you're destined for."

"Yeah, thanks," Hermione said sarcastically and rushed back onto the New York streets. She paused and blinked into the bright sky, suddenly surrounded by people again. She shook her head clear of the nonsense that the psychic had spouted, readjusted her book-bag, and started out for the next 'counselor.' It turned out that the next few on her listed all ended up located in psychic shops. With no desire to have a repeat of the first shop's antics, Hermione didn't even breach their doorsteps. Finally, all that were left were the hospital and a therapist's office only available on weekends.

Hermione checked her watch. Thirty minutes until two. It would be nice to take a break at the Tuneful Brew, maybe even get some reading in before everyone showed up. That settled it for her, and she found a subway entrance and descended into the bustle of a New York subway station. When a train pulled up she followed the other passengers into it and quickly claimed a corner. She pressed her back to the wall and watched the myriad of muggles (and probably non-muggles) who were all heading in the same direction as her for one reason or another.

She got off in an area little less crowded than the previous streets which made it feel like she wasn't in such a huge city anymore. The entrance to wizarding New York was a park tucked snugly between two buildings. It wasn't really a park by most standards, though, because it only housed a bunch of trees in planters stuck every few feet into the cement. Muggles sat on patio chairs clustered around the patches of sunlight streaming between the tree branches, but Hermione made her way towards the waterfall located at the far end of the park. Once there, she discreetly stepped behind one of the ivy walls that lined the park and inched along the slick stone towards the back of the waterfall. The water droplets splashed and drenched her back as she made her way towards the colored mosaic located behind the rushing water. When she was in reach, she quickly tapped the required tiles with her wand and the wall slid away noiselessly to allow her into the wizarding side of New York.

As the wall closed behind her, Hermione cast a hot-air charm on her clothes and hair before starting down the cobblestone street.

* * *

A/N:

The second part of the rather challenging chapters yay!

Also, I'm one of the mods at hpwordsprints on twitter if you want to join me for some friendly competition during NaNoWriMo!


	10. The Tuneful Brew

Hermione started to pull out her robes so she could hide her stained shirt, but was interrupted by a voice.

"Well, what do we have here?"

Her hand paused in her purse at the all too familiar tone. She directed a baleful glare at the blonde man who had spoken. He was wearing a casual robe, his usual sleek appearance more ruffled, but his smirk bordered on a smile. Seeing him in such a pleasant mood irked her.

"What do you think?" she asked sharply before she continued walking. Hermione heard Malfoy start to follow her.

"Actually I was thinking-"

"That was rhetorical, Malfoy."

There was a pause, and then Malfoy spoke up again, "Granger, do the-"

"I said-" Hermione interrupted.

"-colonies dis-"

"Bugger off!"

"-agree with you?"

Hermione paused and glanced back at Malfoy, a few steps behind her.

"Did you always have this cheery disposition or shall we blame the Yankees?" he rephrased and really smirked this time. Hermione knew he was mocking her but couldn't pin down why she was so irritated.

"I'm going to blame you," she said petulantly.

He glanced off over her shoulder and tilted his head as if thinking. "I can't see why... I'll stick with the Yank theory."

Hermione rolled her eyes and started down the road again. Malfoy continued to follow her. She waited for several seconds to see if he would leave; however, each step with Malfoy behind her back made her clench her teeth and hands harder.

"Malfoy, stop following me."

"Hmf, I'm not following you. _You're_ the one in the way of where_ I_ want to go," he still managed to say it arrogantly despite its ridiculousness.

"Clever," Hermione responded sarcastically and tried very hard to ignore him again. They continued to walk down the streets of wizarding New York. The passing shops had a very distinct Victorian influence and looked newer than London's.

Eventually, Malfoy spoke up again. "Granger, where are you going? The Tuneful Brew?" he guessed as it came into view.

"What's it to you?" she said without turning around.

"How silly of me not to guess the great Hermione Granger would be early even to a lunch date."

"I actually came early for a break by myself, _alone_, before everyone else showed up."

"You should rethink that and spend it lion-taming instead."

"Excuse me?" she rounded on him.

Malfoy merely pointed his long finger lazily at her hair. She reached up to touch a much puffier mess than she had had that morning. She groaned as she remembered the hot-air spell.

"And I know you're a muggle-lover, but it's taking it too far if you won't even use a charm on that." His finger trailed down to point at her blouse. She had never gotten her robes on to cover the stain because she had been interrupted by a certain blonde git.

"Honestly, take a little pride in your appearance. I'll show you a spell-"

Her wand was out and at his throat before she had thought about it.

"Don't you even think about pointing a wand at me, Draco Malfoy." He swallowed visibly. "And don't you dare insult my appearance ever again. I'm sick of having those petty and childish taunts thrown at me. You understand?" Hermione could feel the sparks of magic dancing along her fly-away strands of hair.

"I get it, Granger. Now remove your wand before I feel the need to retaliate." Hermione hadn't realized how friendly his voice had been until that tone disappeared. Malfoy stared down at her, his lips a thin line.

She huffed angrily and removed her wand. "As long as we understand each other," she gritted out. After a good glare to make sure he didn't do anything else stupid, she disappeared into the cafe to follow his advice, however loathe she was to admit it.

There went her precious time with her book.

Hermione assessed the damage in the mirror and concluded it wasn't salvageable with magic. She dampened her hair and cast a spell to pull it into a tight plait. As it didn't interfere with the nature of her hair, she hadn't had a problem with that spell. She rummaged around in her purse in hopes of finding a random shirt. Eventually she pulled out the Holyhead Harpies jersey that Ginny had given her shortly after she had joined the team. Hermione pulled it on. It was rather baggy and the colors were a bit gaudy, but it would work. She banished her stained shirt to what she hoped was the dirty laundry in her apartment. Fixed in under five minutes. She nodded proudly at her appearance and her stomach grumbled in reply. Food and book, here she came. She pulled her robes on and went to hunt down the cash-register.

…

"Hey! Hermione!" John half yelled from the cafe door.

Hermione, still caught in her book, glanced up and gave him a half smile.

"You look really different from school." Hermione assumed he meant her hair pulled back and the casual attire. "I didn't recognize you- Draco had to point you out to me."

"Oh," Hermione didn't really have anything to say. She marked her place and slipped the book into her purse.

"In fact, he seemed like he knew exactly where you were. Are you sure there weren't any not-so-chance meetings-?"

"Are you trying to make me gag or do you really not see that we hate each other?" she asked, her patience spent for the day.

"Um…" John paused a few seconds before he clapped her on the back. "I'm joking. Of course, I'm joking." He turned back towards the cafe, "Hey guys, I found her!"

From the cafe door spilled the rest of their school group. Shandra had opted for a much more muggle wardrobe with several beaded necklaces and a peasant top but the blokes didn't look any different than normal.

"Sit down, everyone! Looks like Hermione already got her lunch!"

They pushed together two of the patio tables and everyone settled down around them. Everyone arranged their food across the tables and began to eat. Pleasant chatter of several conversations weaved in and out of each other; Hermione closed her eyes and let them flow around her, content to enjoy her food silently.

"Hey, Hermione, you didn't grab a drink. Don't you like tea? Their iced tea is amazing," John said as the conversation lulled. "Isn't it, Shandra? She got some sort of fruit tea."

Shandra made an agreeing noise but didn't attempt to continue the conversation.

John seemed to actually expect an answer from her, so Hermione replied dryly, "I've had enough of tea for one day. I've got some water in my bag, thanks. Anyways," Hermione continued on in an attempt to escape anymore of John's awkward conversational attempts. "Daryn, were you guys talking about the music here?"

"Yes, well, we were talking about the gig my band has."

"What type of music do you play?"

"We've been described as similar to The Rhythmic Runes… or the Dave Matthews Band if you listen to muggle music."

"I think I've heard of them," confirmed Hermione, vaguely recalling the name.

"Oh, I really like that band! It's nice that wizards are drawing from modern music," Shandra joined. "I can't wait to hear you live!"

"Yeah, it's just some of my high school band friends," Daryn said modestly.

"Hey, we could all go together!" John joined in. "When are you playing?"

"We're playing at the bar down the street tonight."

"Sounds sweet, bro. What do you think, Draco?" John swung his arm around Draco.

Malfoy shrugged it off. "I don't go to pubs."

"I'm sure it's a nice place if Daryn is playing there," Shandra joined in.

"I don't care how nice it is, I'm not going," Malfoy said flatly. Shandra and John shared a look and John shrugged behind Malfoy's back.

"Is anyone else playing at the bar?" John continued on brazenly, despite the sinking mood.

"There's an older group who play some wizarding classics like 'Magic Works' and 'A Cauldron Full of Hot, Strong Love.'"

"Oh, gag!" Shandra exclaimed. "Those songs are horrible! We'll have to make sure to escape before they start. How can a decent place still play that stuff? Civilized witches and wizards don't like that outdated pureblood crap!"

"Would you stop insulting purebloods?" Hermione almost hissed when Shandra finished.

Shandra scoffed. "You're the last person I would expect saying things like that. Besides, everyone thinks like that. Purebloods are awful for what they did."

"Stop talking about things you don't understand!" Hermione said angrily. "Some of my best friends were purebloods and fought for the Light! During the- they were... some were ki-kil- ...and the others- they-" she sputtered. Flashes of that night came unbidden to her. She gritted her teeth as she started to cry and rushed on quickly, "If you assume all of them were the same just because of blood you are exactly like those purebloods you always insult!" She stood up quickly, her chair clattering to the ground. Hermione barely registered Shandra's mouth hanging slightly open. She had to get away until the memories stopped. She rushed towards the gate that lead out to the main street in wizarding New York.

"Hermione!" Daryn called when he caught up to her. "Hermione, are you okay?"

"I just- too many things today. S-sorry," instead of looking at him, she hunted for a tissue in her bag, hoping he would just leave.

"Is talking about the War still hard?"

What an understatement, Hermione thought, but she only nodded. She gave up fishing in her bag and wiped her eyes with the heel of her hand.

Daryn patted her back with his hand a little awkwardly. That just set her off again, tears spilled down her face and snot running out of her nose. She sniffed and rubbed it with the back of her hand, acutely embarrassed.

"Um…" Daryn summoned a tissue. "Here."

"Thanks," she half-sobbed, desperate to get control of herself again.

"Listen, if you ever need to talk."

She knew he was being sincere, but how could she take up an offer from a young man she had barely met.

"Thanks, Williams. I'll let you know if I feel up to it."

"Williams?"

"Oh, sorry, Daryn."

"Old habits die hard? Draco was grumbling about that the other day."

"About old habits?" Hermione asked, wondering about what sort of old habits Malfoy would complain about. Surely he didn't just talk about his old Death Eater ways to blokes off the street?

"No, the last name versus first name thing."

"Oh."

"Listen, about Shandra…"

"Tell her I'm sorry I snapped."

"She's just voicing a pretty prevalent viewpoint of the war from this side of the Atlantic. Don't be too hard on her. Most people are ignorant, but she's also clung onto it to help her cope."

"Cope?"

"Sorry… I should probably let her tell you about that."

"Erm… okay. Good luck at your gig tonight, I'll try to make it to your next one but-"

"I understand. Hope you feel better, Hermione."

Hermione nodded awkwardly and they parted ways.

* * *

A/N: Another chapter! 

Thank you again for the reviews! I really love you guys for your support so far! I'd love to know what you thought of the chapter! Have a lovely weekend :)


	11. In which a phone is used to argue

Sunday Harry called again. Hermione started to beckon Luna over to the phone, but paused when Harry asked for a private word. Hermione quickly held up her hand instead and mouthed 'wait a minute' away from the receiver. Luna nodded and sat back down to work on the scroll she had been writing on.

"What is it, Harry?" Hermione asked.

"Do you what Ginny's life goals are?"

"Erm… other than Quidditch? No, it's not something we normally include in our 'girl talk.'"

"Oh… well, do you know if she wants to do anything before she settles down?"

"You want to know if she wants to travel?" Hermione guessed, but Harry sighed frustratedly. "What are you trying to get at," Hermione finally huffed.

"You know, does she..."

"Does she what?" Hermione prompted as the silence lengthened.

"There's my girl!" it sounded like Harry's mouth was away from the phone. Hermione heard him put down the phone and Ron's irritated voice in the background. A moment later Harry was back on the phone, "speakerphone is on!"

"Hermione, tell Harry that he needs to stop with the PDA!" Ron jumped in right away.

"Ron, Harry's house is not public; therefore, it is not a 'Public Display of Affection,'" Hermione replied patiently.

"Fine, tell him that snogging my little sister is disgusting and he has to wait until she's older."

"Not that again, Ronald," Ginny cut in. "I'm twenty one! It's none of your business what we do!"

"Yeah, but just barely," Ron grumbled.

Everyone's voices were short and snippy and Hermione figured this had become a near constant argument amongst them when they met up.

"Besides, Ron," Harry joined. "You didn't seem to be bothered when you snogged Hermione. She was only eighteen then, right?"

Hermione silently groaned, Harry had encroached on the 'forbidden subject.' Ron sputtered.

"Harry!" Ginny whispered indignantly.

"Look where that got me!" Ron answered angrily. "She's on the other side of the planet now."

Hermione stayed silent as her mind rushed for an answer. It wasn't like he was the only reason she had moved, but he had been a deciding factor. Everyone asking about her and Ron had really started to grate on her already thin nerves.

"I don't think that's why Hermione moved to America, right?" Harry asked.

"Erm... of course not!" Hermione tried to laugh.

"So, she still left me!"

Hermione winced. This was also a oft repeated conversation. Hermione never came out and said that she wanted to break up since they never officially 'got together.' However, it seemed that Ron thought they had.

"Well, Hermione?" Ron pressed. "Why did you ditch me?"

"I'm not 'ditching' you."

"No, you're just being a coward! You are running from us just like you've run away from anything that has to do with the war!" Ron sounded like he was working himself up to being furious.

"Ron, go cool off in the kitchen!" Ginny had decided to interrupt their 'lover's spat.' There was a small scuffle and then Ginny continued, falsely cheery, "he's gone!"

"I'm sorry," Hermione continued desperately. She silently begging her friends to forgive her, worried they hated her for how she treated Ron.

"Hermione," Harry started and paused. "If you had to break it off, it was better you did it earlier." Harry's statement left an unsaid 'but' hanging in the air.

"So, what are you planning on doing for your birthday?" Ginny broke in, pouring the cheeriness on strong.

"What?" Hermione asked, caught off guard.

"It's only two weeks away, what are you going to do? Who are you going out with?"

"Erm… Luna, I guess, if she isn't busy?" Hermione started when she realized Luna was still working on her scroll. "Luna!" Luna looked up with a sedated smile, ink spread across her lower lip where she had tapped it with her quill. "Please, come join us!" As Luna got up, Hermione explained, "we were talking about my birthday, are you free on the nineteenth?"

"For your birthday?" Luna asked. "That's next Thursday, isn't it?"

"You've been keeping track?" Hermione asked, surprised.

"Of course! That's what a friend does, isn't it? Keep track of important information about someone?"

"Or a stalker," Ginny muttered, barely audible.

"Ginny!" Hermione scolded, but continued, "Thank you, Luna!" She gave into the impulse to give Luna a quick embrace.

"Oh!" Luna said, and delicately patted Hermione on the back.

"So," Ginny prompted. "What are you going to do? You can't hide at home with a book now that I'm not there to take you out!"

"There is a full moon that weekend," Luna explained. "I thought we could go stargazing that night and watch as the mooncalves come out, and maybe collect their feces."

Hermione was too busy being touched that Luna had thought about her to debate the attractions of mooncalf feces.

Ginny was not in similar awe. "Have you made any friends at school, Hermione?"

"Kind of?" Hermione hedged.

"You could do something with them too, right?"

"Possibly…"

"Okay, Hermione, out with it, what's the problem?"

"Well, the friends I have made are in my lab group."

"So?"

"Well, if I invited some of them, it would probably be uncouth to not invite all of them."

"I don't see the problem. The more the merrier!"

"Draco Malfoy is in my lab group."

"Merlin's beard!"

"Dragon bogeys!" Harry and Ginny exclaimed their disbelief almost simultaneously.

"What? What did I miss?" came Ron's voice in the background, suspiciously sounding like he was talking around food.

"How is Draco Malfoy going to your school?" Harry cried.

"That bastard!" Ron joined and Hermione could determine that his mouth was indeed full of something. "Why he'd come out of hiding there… or at all?"

"How did he manage to go to the exact school as you, Hermione?" Ginny asked.

Hermione shrugged, she had asked herself the same question. "The school is the most prestigious in the Eastern United States. It figures that Malfoy would want to go a prestigious university, right?"

"Of all the rotten luck," Ginny commiserated.

"Do they know who he is? You should get him kicked out!" Ron added.

"He's put on this 'reformed' act," Hermione sighed. "He told the teacher the he's 'changed' and that he's sorry for what he did."

"Maybe he is sorry," Luna joined in.

"Rubbish!" Ron exclaimed angrily.

"How is he treating you, Hermione?" Harry cut in.

"He's always throwing around childish insults but he hasn't called me a mudblood," Hermione replied. "I think he's scared of how people will see him. There's this weird prejudice against purebloods over here. They assume all purebloods acted and believed like the Death Eaters."

"That's backward," Harry commented. "Just look at the Weasley family."

"That's what I told them!" Hermione joined heatedly.

"Keep an eye on him, Hermione, he's still Malfoy," Harry said in a worried tone. "Has he done anything suspicious?"

"No… he seems almost civil?" Hermione mused. "I'll let you guys know if he does, though."

"Civil? Malfoy?" Ron snorted.

"Yeah, I know. That's why it seems suspicious."

"Keep us updated, okay Hermione?" Harry said.

"Sure, Harry."

With that, they said their goodbyes. Hermione hung up the phone and realized Harry hadn't finished their initial conversation or anything else, for that matter. She decided that she rather leave it at that, though. Everyone had forgotten their annoyances with her once Malfoy had been brought up and she wanted it to stay that way. He's actually good for something, she thought, amused.

"We didn't talk about you, Luna," Hermione continued as the thought occurred to her. "How is it going with your work and your boss?" She remembered the question from the other day. "You said your boss was acting weird?"

"Yes, that…" Luna acknowledged. "He'll be talking and then trail off and stare at me. He jumped when our hands accidentally touched and was very adamant that someone else join us when we observed Diriclaw under the Brooklyn bridge the other night."

Hermione's eyebrows raised, "He sounds very gentlemanly."

"He is very traditional in his dress and customs. There are some who are very rude to him because he holds on to the old ways."

"That's horrible," Hermione sympathized.

"Yes, he doesn't let it bother him, though."

"So, maybe you could invite him when we go mooncalf watching? I'd like to meet him."

"I'll see if he is available," Luna acquiesced. "I'll see if your friends are available on your birthday and we celebrate with them as well."

"Oh, you don't have to do that, Luna!" Hermione wondered if Luna had somehow missed the Draco Malfoy fiasco that had just occurred on the phone.

"But don't you like celebrating your birthday with your friends?" Luna asked.

"Er… yes, but Luna…"

"Don't worry," Luna said in her soft, airy voice. "Do you plan on getting the day off?"

"No, there will be plenty of time after school if we do something."

"Speaking of which, what are you doing on Wednesday?"

"Wednesday?"

"Yes, it's September 11th."

Hermione felt the pit of her stomach drop. She had forgotten. She had seen it on the television and felt that horror that radiated from the people of New York, but she had soon been caught up again in her own life and it's troubles. Now she was in New York, the place where it happened, only a year afterwards and all the memories from that day rushed in again. She shrugged helplessly.

"I hadn't thought about it, I probably still have school."

"Tell me once you know."

Hermione nodded as Luna wandered off into her room.

* * *

A/N: Hey guys! I probably sound like a broken record but thank you so much for the reviews and to my patient beta! It really means a lot. I'm a novice writer so feedback about everything, even or esp. critical, is much appreciated because I want to become better! Also, knowing which parts you like helps me decide what I will write about in future chapters ;) No Draco in this or the next chapter, but he's at least mentioned in this one?

Again, thank you my lovely readers and have a great week


	12. September Eleventh

At school on Tuesday, the Professors announced that there would be no school the following day, both in memoriam for those who were murdered that day and because there would be a large influx of muggles in New York City. Hermione glanced over the student body as they murmured to each other. There were quite a few who had arms around each other or a hand over their mouth. She turned to Daryn who was sitting next to her that day. He was watching the other students as well.

"What are you going to do tomorrow?" She asked, remembering Luna's question.

"My sister and I are going to go down to Ground Zero to watch part of the ceremony," he looked at her and continued. "Would you like to join us?"

Relieved, she quickly responded in the affirmative. Hermione didn't really want to try to navigate New York City while it was so crowded. "Could my roommate, Luna, join us too?"

"Of course. I'd like to meet one of your friends. In fact, could we floo to your place? Then we could just take public transportation down."

Hermione agreed gladly and they shared information so Daryn could access their fireplace. Hermione promised to drop her wards before eight tomorrow, which was when they decided to meet.

"But, do you think there will be another terrorist attack?" Hermione asked.

"The city has been preparing for this, the security will be very tight tomorrow," Daryn replied. "I pray there won't be."

Hermione nodded hesitantly.

…

That morning she woke up early and knew that she wasn't going to fall back asleep. Hermione decided to make it a slow morning and prepared some tea and toast while she studied spells for her Diagnostic and Healing Charms Class. She was eating her second piece of toast when Luna appeared from her room.

"Morning," Luna greeted before making her way over to the television. She carefully placed two boom boxes and their cords in a circle around the telly. She then threaded a keyboard's cord through the other cords to make a continuous plait, resting the keyboard itself haphazardly against one of the boom boxes. Hermione watched the proceedings over her cup of tea, debating whether she felt up to asking what Luna was up to. Seemingly satisfied, Luna turned the telly on. She executed poses similar to a modern dancer each time she flipped through the channels. Hermione just watched with resigned amusement and continued to eat her toast until Luna found a news station and stopped at that channel.

They were replaying footage from last year. Hermione immediately lost her appetite. They had turned it on just in time to see the plane speed up and crash into the second tower. Someone was screaming expletives, the camera swinging wildly as they ran, catching occasional glimpses of the sky full of fire and smoke. From another angle, she watched as the first tower collapsed in on itself, crushing the thousands of occupants trapped on its floors. The cloud of smoke and ash bore down with terrifying speed, the people on the streets trying to outrace it as they searched for shelter. A man forcibly dragged a woman away who was sobbing about her daughter as the ash filled the rest of the screen behind them. Hermione cupped her mouth with her hands, eyes still transfixed on the television, and swayed in her seat. Someone was groaning off camera, expressing their shock over and over.

Hermione couldn't decide whether she wanted to beg Luna to turn it off or to just let it play. She focused on keeping her breathing even but was distracted by a rattling sound. Looking down, she saw it was the tea cup she was holding rapidly hitting her plate. She put the cup down and placed both of her trembling hands into her lap. Her breathing was getting worse. She gasped quietly, trying to block out the sudden onslaught of her own memories. Dementors filling the skies with their dark ghostly tails. The death eaters closing in. Her own terror choking her throat.

Something slightly cold touched her hand. Hermione looked up. It was Luna's hand, her wrist covered in cold metal bangles.

"Wrackspurts?" Luna asked.

"Er... not quite," Hermione answered, clearing her throat, and tried to get air back into lungs. She felt Luna's hand tighten lightly around her hand and she gripped Luna's hand back. Then Hermione saw the time and the moment was broken. She quickly released Luna's hand, "Luna, Daryn is going to be here in less than fifteen minutes!" Hermione scrambled to lower the wards before sprinting off to her own bedroom.

When she resurfaced Luna was on the sofa again but Daryn and a young girl had joined her. The girl's mouth was slightly open and she followed Luna's movements with fascination. Hermione looked back at Luna, who was wearing a red and white striped shirt, a jean cut off jacket with an American flag stitched onto it, a patchwork skirt of dozens of different star patterns and streams of red, white and blue Mardi Gras necklaces everywhere she could find to hang them. Tiny American flags were tangled into Luna's hair as well as what looked like tinsel.

Luna was talking about boom boxes and Fulmentrice pixies and Daryn was nodding with a faint flummoxed expression fighting to take over his polite smile. Hermione supposed she might have forgotten over the five years that she had known Luna how overwhelming it could be when one first met her.

"...and so the Fulmentrice pixies are distracted by the interwoven e-lick-trick-see-tea... oh and Hermione is finished changing," Luna finished breezily.

"Hermione!" Daryn said, looking up at her. "This is my little sister, Jordan." He gestured to the girl sitting next to him. She couldn't have been more than ten. The girl was dressed with American patriotism like Luna but much more conservatively. An American flag bandana was wrapped around her head and her hair was braided with plastic red, white and blue beads at the tips.

Hermione bent down with a smile and reached her hand out towards the little girl. "Hi Jordan, my name is Hermione."

The girl reached her hand out and grasped Hermione's, giving her a small shy smile back. Luna made her way over to the kitchen.

"I made some lunch for us because I didn't know how long we'd be out," Luna said as she pulled out a colorful bag from the fridge.

"What did you make?" Hermione asked, comprehensive.

"A typical American lunch- PB and J's, fruit juice and a snack."

"Snack?"

Luna held up a bag of corn nuts. Hermione suspected it was one of the more bizarre flavors.

"I love corn nuts!" Jordan said. Looking at Jordan's grin, Hermione figured she could manage eating flavored fried corn for a day.

After repacking Luna's lunches, they left their apartment and took the subway as far as it went before the city had shut it down as a safety precaution. They were redirected to buses that would take them to the actual site. As they traveled, Hermione was struck by the sheer volume of American flags surrounding her.

Flags flew half-mast, tugging fitfully in the strong wind. Some people wore flags around their shoulders, and many more wore bandanas similar to Jordan's or t-shirts with flags on them, but the most common were the small flags being waved from small wood sticks. The closer they drew, the more frequent these displays of American patriotism became as well as the frequency of uniforms walking the streets. It also became more and more crowded. At first Daryn and Hermione had gripped tightly onto Jordan's hands to make sure she wasn't lost, but eventually Daryn pulled her up onto his shoulders. Jordan giggled and clung onto Daryn's forehead, her head turning rapidly to observe the crowd.

"Ow, watch the eyes, Jordan," he said lightly as her hands slipped over his face. "Can't get anywhere if you cover those."

Hermione felt her panic rise at being pressed up against so many other bodies. She reached out to find Luna's hand again. At her touch, Luna looked up and saw Hermione's expression. Luna pulled Hermione's hood as far over her face as possible.

"Luna?" Hermione asked.

"This always helped my second-cousin calm down if he couldn't stop crying when I babysat him."

Luna pulled out her wand, which she had disguised with a glittery silver star and tinsel streamers, and tapped Hermione on the forehead with it. Suddenly, it felt like she was underwater- both sound and light had been dampened. It was actually calming in her state and, despite the fact that this spell seemed to have been invented for an infant, she didn't break it with her own nonverbal 'finite' until she was sure the panic had completely subsided.

After a bit Jordan tugged on Daryn's ear. "Daryn, go over there!" She was pointing away from the crowd a little where there was a very small park. Daryn glanced back at Hermione and Luna, but Luna was already making her way over towards where Jordan had pointed. Hermione simply shrugged and followed suit. When she was closer, Hermione saw what had drawn Jordan's attention. Along the fence that enclosed the park, several people had set up artistic monuments in tribute. Daryn swung Jordan off of his shoulders and set her gently on the ground. Hermione caught herself admiring his strength to do that with ease with a ten year old and quickly stopped.

Jordan went up to admire the displays and Hermione followed. Hermione noticed that many photos had been attached onto the fence with flags and flowers woven through the cross-links surrounded them. One of the photos that had the words 'Missing' at the bottom and she realized that some of these people would never have anymore than the ash of the towers as the answer to whether their loved ones were dead. She thought of Lisa Turpin's family. They never had been able to find her body at Hogwarts. She wondered if the gut-wrenching hope that she might still be alive was a blessing or a curse. She had seen Turpin's family at the mass funeral service they had had. They had struggled between giving her a grave or not, reluctant to commit to something so final about her death. She was wondering about the man in the photo, a candid of a man smiling at a party, and if his own family went through the same thing when someone tugged at her shirt. Hermione wiped her eyes and bent down to listen to Jordan explain a piece of art to her. She glanced back to see Luna and Daryn conversing a little way back but turned her attention back to Jordan.

"This is what Uncle wore when he went to heaven with the towers," Jordan was pointing to a firefighter's hat.

"Uncle?" Hermione asked.

Jordan nodded and then leaned close, cupping her fingers around Hermione's ear, "Uncle's a muggle. Daryn says he is the bravest of muggles and wizards."

Hermione nodded and tried to smile. "I'm sure he was, darling."

They walked on to where a parade of fire trucks and uniformed men and women were walking down the cleared streets. The crowd held signs of gratitude and other officers saluted as the parade passed. Amongst the crowd there were some who held photographs or had them pinned onto their clothes. A visible sign of the loss they felt in their chests everyday. Hermione turned and buried her face into Luna's shoulder. Luna simply patted her back and said nothing, continuing to watch the solemn parade. They stayed and listened to some of the names of the victims being read at the site, but left for a nearby park once Jordan became too tired and hungry.

Later, in the evening, they attended a memorial service at a local church. They listened to the stories of survivors, bravery of the firefighters and civilians in the buildings and planes and from family members left behind. Afterwards, Hermione joined the group as they lit candles and placed small objects and flowers around photos as makeshift shrines for their loved ones. A woman sobbed openly over the photo of what Hermione assumed was her husband. Luna and Daryn were gone and, in their absence, she was able to drop the need to be the strong Hermione Granger, war hero. Instead of fighting the terror and sadness that seeped into her conscious when her control slipped, she gave into it. It was ugly and loud but she let herself be justified in it. She cried for these people she had never met and she cried for Ron and the Weasleys, for George whose life literally was cut in half, for Teddy Lupin who would never know his parents. She let herself cry for herself. For the pain of betraying her parents, of being hurt over and over again, for losing her trust in the world being a good place. She stopped telling herself how much worse off everyone else was and just let herself feel the pain that she had tried to suffocate. Gradually her sobs decreased and she realized a hand was on her shoulder. It was the woman she had been watching earlier.

"They are in God's hands now." The candle the woman held threw flickering light across the woman's face so that Hermione could see a reassuring smile framed by tears.

Hermione tried to smile back, but she felt it stretch brokenly across her face, tears slipping over her lips into her mouth. They sat beside each other, the woman's arm wrapped around Hermione's back, until a bell called them back for a final prayer.

* * *

A/N: You guys are amazing. Thank you so much for the new reviews! *hugs* Fleurdelys21's advice really helped me out this time so hats off to her too of course.

In memoriam.


	13. In which there are potion problems

She woke to her curtains on fire and her wand gone. Lavender and Parvati were screaming and when Hermione moved to the door she saw it was on fire as well. She went to the window only to see she was hundreds of stories up. When she turned back around the Gryffindor tower had become a stairwell. Muggles were running past her but when she started to follow someone caught her by her hair. It was Malfoy. Fire still burned the door and Voldemort's face emerged from the flames, seemingly unscathed and alive. She tried to scream but nothing came and as she struggled it was now Bellatrix that held her down. Bellatrix laughed and threw a curse in her face.

Hermione dropped to the ground, blood pouring from her arm. She watched it run down the empty staircase into a pool of blood that surrounded Luna. Hermione tried to get up to go to her, but her muscles didn't work. She cried in frustration. Ron bent over Luna's lifeless form and then looked up angrily and yelled that she had let Luna die. She tried to tell him he was wrong but she still couldn't speak. Suddenly, there was a rumble that shook the stairwell, and the floor dropped beneath her.

She woke up as her body jerked in anticipation of falling. She was covered in a cold sweat, her blankets twisted around her feet but mostly shoved onto the floor. Her breath was still heavy and she was too alert and scared to lie back down. She shuddered at the empty room, wishing she had roommates like she did back in Hogwarts. She flicked on a light, but didn't feel brave enough to leave her bed yet. Groping around on her bed stand, Hermione found a book she had left from a few nights before. It seemed like her sleeping draught had worn off, but it was too late to take another dose so she resolved to read until she felt tired again.

The next time she looked at the clock it was almost five in the morning. She still didn't feel tired enough to fall back asleep. Sighing, she pulled out the vial of sleeping draught she kept by her bed. She figured that taking a draught this late was justified since she needed at least a few hours of sleep to function at school. Taking a dose that allowed her fifteen minutes to prep for school in the morning, she lay back down and waited for the potion to take effect. After ten minutes Hermione got up frustratedly and rummaged around in her potions box. Finding a vial of dreamless sleep, she tapped out a drop onto her finger and licked it. The effects were almost instantaneous. With great effort, she drunkenly placed the vial on the floor before collapsing onto the bedding spread on the floor.

…

Hermione's incessant alarm blurred in and out of her consciousness. Her body felt like it was full of lead, weighing her down to the floor. As well her head was aching, the effort to pull herself into wakefulness was physical pain to her mind. She searched blindly for her alarm but it wasn't within reach. Hermione slipped back into unconsciousness.

"Hermione, your alarm has been going off for the past five minutes," Luna called from the doorway. "Why are you on the floor? Is it more comfortable?"

Hermione merely groaned as she rolled into a sitting position and peaked through the slit of her eye at Luna.

"You look terrible." Luna commented.

"Urg-" Hermione said thickly.

"Something is wrong with you, Hermione? Are you staying home today?"

"No! School is important!" Hermione used that bit of adrenaline to locate her wand on the bedside table. She accio-ed a pepper-up potion and some clothes. After knocking back the potion, an annoying buzzing started up in her head but now she now felt up to only bothered with changing her trousers and slipped the robe over her pyjama top.

"You always did put schoolwork before your health at Hogwarts."

"I'm fine, Luna, thanks for your help," Hermione said. She grabbed her wand and her bag and stumbled towards the floo. "Enjoy work."

At school she collapsed into her seat, resting her head in her arms. She drifted into a somewhat pleasant half-consciousness that was interrupted when John tried to talk to her. He stopped when she shrugged him off. She must have really fell asleep because the next thing she knew everyone was forming lab groups. Looking blearily around, she lifted her head from her arms. She knew she should feel horror at sleeping through class but her mind was still hazy and it made it hard to care or think.

"Good morning," John joked and Hermione attempted a smile despite her irritation.

Embarrassed, she asked, "So, diagnostic spells, right?"

"Yeah," confirmed Daryn. "_Reperio Veneficium_ and it's derivatives."

Hermione nodded, she had studied that chapter.

"Don't worry, Granger," Malfoy said snarkily. "I'm sure you already know more than the teacher does about the subject even if you slept through class."

Hermione merely sniffed in his direction, and proceed to ignore him. It hadn't been a blatant insult so she wasn't sure how to respond in mixed-company.

They split into their normal groups and things proceeded typically, except that Hermione had an awful headache and thinking required slogging through a dense fog in her mind.

When Daryn practiced on her, the warning bells clanged in her head and emotions quickly welled up in her. However, she sat and quietly focused on breathing, telling herself it would be done shortly. It was but Daryn was again staring puzzledly at their textbook.

"Hermione, do you have any long term spells on you or taken any potions recently?"

Hermione opened her mouth but Daryn interrupted.

"No, let me see if I can figure out what it is. _Reperio Incantatio_!" He paused "Hm… don't think so. _Reperio Venenum_!" Daryn consulted the book again. "Got it, I think it's a potion. Not a polyjuice potion is it?" Daryn laughed.

Hermione, who had been practicing breathing exercises attempted a weak laugh. "If that were true, I would have warded myself against simple spells like that, wouldn't I?"

"If you were smart, yes. What is it then, what long term potions would you be using?"

"I took a pepper-up potion this morning."

"But that was over three hours ago. Would it still show up?"

"Maybe," Hermione shrugged but her sluggish mind was slowly putting together the pieces. "Oh."

"What?"

"No-nothing…"

"Granger you didn't happen to mix potions you weren't supposed to?" Malfoy's drawl came from the other table.

"Mind your own business, Malfoy!" she glared at him and he leaned back with a smirk.

"How in Merlin's beard could I? Granger making a mistake with potions. This has got to be a first, and I don't want to miss it."

Hermione's eyebrow twitched. Good thing he never learned about second year's incident.

"What are you talking about?" John asked, sounding bewildered.

Hermione spared him a glance before continuing to stare down Malfoy.

"Short-term potions, if combined improperly, will result in more long-term side-effects," Hermione answered.

"Like a bookworm sleeping through class," Malfoy supplied smugly. "What was it, hair potion gone wrong? I can only see multiple potions being able to subdue that." Malfoy gestured at the hair she had left in it's frizzy plait. "Or maybe a beauty potion? Trying out Madame Sullivan's Potions? I heard she's a fraud."

"It was just some sleeping draughts, I told you to stop insulting up my appearance!" Hermione was angry and her control slipped.

Malfoy smirked but said more seriously, "Combining those are dangerous. Don't assume as 'the Great Granger' you can solve everything and go check at the hospital to see if you permanently screwed anything up."

Hermione was fully prepared to snap at him when Daryn put a hand on her arm.

"He's right. Sometimes people just don't wake up after they mix sleeping draughts. It's sometimes used by severely depressed witches to-"

Hermione looked up towards Malfoy but he angrily turned away, his expression masked again. Judging by his reaction, Hermione assumed the warning had come from personal experience.

"Why isn't anyone working?" It was Professor Greythorn's voice.

"We discovered that Hermione had-" John started.

Hermione quickly sat up and tried to give him a look that said 'don't you say another word.' Apparently John didn't understand Hermione-facial language or choose to ignore it. He continued, "-mixed potions and we could detect the side effects with the spells." He looked proud of himself for figuring it out. Hermione just felt irritation, she didn't want the professor to know about her mistake.

"Hm… well then. All of you will accompany… Hermione… to the hospital."

"What?" Hermione asked, involuntarily.

"Yes, it will be very instructive for all of you."

Hermione wavered, she would've wanted to go if it had been anyone else.

"Well, go on," the professor said. Everybody started packing up their things.

When the professor was out of earshot, Hermione turned on everyone. "Only for the initial examination."

"Lighten up, Hermione, it will be fun!" John said.

Yes, Hermione thought sarcastically, that's exactly what this will be. She glared at Malfoy who was feigning ignorance.

…

Hermione filled out several sheets of questionnaires before they even let her past the reception desk. When the healers asked, she refused to say out loud all the potions she had consumed in the past twenty-four hours and wrote them down instead. She didn't want to admit to several doses of calming draught, two doses of sleeping draught, another dose of dreamless sleep and a pepper-up potion all in such quick succession in front of her classmates. She wasn't sure how this would affect what they thought of her, and she sure didn't want Malfoy to know any personal information about her he hadn't already managed to gain.

The healers made quick work of running through several of the diagnostic spells they had already learned and jumped into discussing some potion theory that Hermione half followed. She wished she had all of her brain to help her decipher what they were saying. It didn't help that Daryn and Malfoy were discussing something in low voices while the healers worked. Finally the healers left, promising to come back with the anecdotal potion within half an hour. Once they did Hermione quickly attempted to oust all of her classmates.

"The examination part is finished, show's over."

They acquiesced for the most part.

"Thanks for getting sick and taking us on a field trip!" John called as he exited her room.

Hermione rolled her eyes.

Daryn hung back for a moment after the others left. "Was it because of yesterday?" he asked.

Hermione pressed her lips together and looked away.

"Yesterday triggered something, right?" Daryn pressed.

"Daryn, I know you're trying to help-" Hermione started.

"I am, so listen. I think I know something that might help. Are you available tomorrow after school?"

Hermione hesitated, "I guess."

Daryn smiled and left.

* * *

A/N: Happy Thanksgiving to any American readers! I'm so sorry about last week: I saved it as a draft and didn't realize it never published until today. So you get double chapters this week? Hope you are all well!


	14. In which Hermione is confronted

Hermione rolled the vial of sleeping draught around in her hand, its inky depths had become synonymous with peaceful sleep for her. The guardian of her nights. Her healers had said she couldn't take any potions so her systems could normalize but she was scared what might happen if she didn't take anything. It had been months since she hadn't taken a potion before bed.

Although the anecdotal potion had taken the edge away, Hermione still felt slightly sedated. Maybe, she thought, it would be enough to help her fall asleep tonight. Luna had to stay out late that night for her job again and Hermione also worried Luna's quite entrance might wake her even if she could sleep. In the end, Hermione cast a silencing ward around her room, made sure to block the city's lights from filtering through her window and settled among her sheets, hoping sleep would not elude her.

…

That Friday Hermione woke to an unusual lack of foreboding. She was used to shaking off a sense of malaise by diving right into studying. Puzzled, she continued her routine, only remembering to cancel her wards when Luna walked past and Hermione couldn't hear her usual humming.

After school, Hermione flooed with Daryn to his mysterious location. He had been rather tight-lipped about it when she asked. Hermione stepped out of the fireplace, dusting her clothes off, and looked around. There were several children running around. She saw a young child sitting with on the floor, the toys around them moving on their own.

"Is this a magical baby-sitting place?" Hermione asked.

"Pretty close." Daryn replied as he came out after her. "It's basically the equivalent of a wizarding Boys and Girls Club."

"Oh," Hermione's head buzzed with curiosity.

"Listen," Daryn said. "When I was going through a tough time in my life, it really helped to have someone who needed me. I was thinking that volunteering might help you with… you know."

"But why didn't you say anything before?" Hermione asked.

"Daryn," someone called from behind Hermione. It was a civil tone, but Hermione was almost positive she knew who it belonged to. She turned to face him.

"So we-" Malfoy trailed off as he saw her, his face changing slightly. "Oh. Granger." Malfoy sounded resigned.

"Why?" Hermione rounded on Daryn.

"I don't know wizarding New York very well so I asked Draco," Daryn said defensively under her glare. "Besides, you two have gone through similar experiences…" Hermione snorted. "I thought…" Daryn trailed off into a sigh. "You can still help her sign up, right Draco?" he finished.

"When you asked about volunteering I thought it was for you," Malfoy accused.

Daryn shrugged helplessly under Malfoy's scowl. "I'm just trying to help."

"Help?" Malfoy repeated incredulously.

"Both of you don't like each other, I understand, but wouldn't it be better to bond over your shared experience instead of focusing on whatever divides you?"

Hermione let out a high, disbelieving laugh.

Malfoy glowered.

"Do they run any sort of background check?" Hermione asked.

"Um… not that I know of," Daryn responded, nonplussed.

"_Hermione_," Malfoy suddenly said saccharinely, putting his arm around her shoulder. All of her muscles tensed. "_Dear_, I think we can discuss some of the finer details outside, _alone._" Hermione stepped out from under his arm but her curiosity got the better of her and she still followed him as he moved towards an exit.

"Guys," Daryn started hesitantly. "I've got somewhere I need to be soon..."

"By all means," Malfoy adopted a faux courteous attitude and gestured to the floo.

"Don't worry!" Hermione called over her shoulder. "I've got my wand."

"That's not comforting," Hermione thought she heard Daryn say as they disappeared around the corner.

Malfoy led Hermione to the top of the building. The wind whipped their hair around their faces as they settled in the middle of the roof. Hermione was very careful to avoid any views that allowed her to look down.

Malfoy pulled out his wand and Hermione immediately palmed hers, adrenaline tingling her senses.

"Relax, Granger," Malfoy cast a muffliato spell.

Hermione did relax, but did not sheath her wand, "What did you want _dear Draco_?" Hermione echoed.

Malfoy shuddered and collected himself.

"Granger, I want to make a deal."

"A deal? What are you up to Malfoy?"

"I'm sick of you bringing up my past."

"Not following."

"Did you think that it might not be a coincidence that we are both in America?"

"It did seem like a rather big one," Hermione agreed.

"Did it occur in your bushy brain that I also came out here to avoid certain things?"

"Enlighten me," Hermione said sarcastically.

"Oh, you _know_. Don't tell me you didn't see the things in the papers, or watch people spit at those with any ties to the Dark Lord. And those were the conservative ones."

"Poor Malfoy," Hermione didn't even try to empathize

"I'm trying to leave that person behind, and here you are throwing it back in my face. If you don't keep your fat lips shut someone is going to figure it out!"

"Which part?" Hermione felt herself slipping into a dangerous mood.

Malfoy seemed to sense it as well and looked cautious.

"About how you hate Mudbloods?"

He winced.

"Or maybe how you are a Death Eater?"

"Was! I _was_ one!" Malfoy said vehemently.

"Or how you betrayed the whole school to Voldemort? Tried to kill Dumbledore? Insulted my friends and I for years. Let us rot in your manor? Let Bellatrix torture me?" Hermione was hysterical. "Which part of it, Malfoy?"

He looked haunted. "All of it! Damn you Granger!"

It felt empowering to throw it in his face instead of mincing around it, Hermione thought. It was nice to have anger burn up the sadness for once. Hermione stood tall, feeling self-righteous.

"I guess there are limits, even for the champion of house-elves," he snarled half-heartedly.

"How did you know that?" Hermione asked, her voice losing some of it's anger in her surprise.

"One of my friends loved being at the center of gossip-mill. Spew: it was good for a laugh."

Hermione growled, after all, he was Dobby's owner.

Malfoy looked tired. He paused, dragging his head over his face and down his mouth. "Look, Granger. I didn't come out here to fight. I have a horrible past, as you have been so kind as to point out. I have no excuse for what I have done. I only want to change and I want your help. Every time you throw that accusatory glare at me I'm brought right back to Hogwarts. It's hard to fight something like that pulling me back to my old-ways."

Hermione mulled it over.

"So, do we have a deal? What are your terms?"

Hermione stopped and looked up at him with squinted eyes. "That whole 'I've changed' charade. 'I need your help'. You are trying to manipulate me!" she accused.

Malfoy smirked and shrugged. "Yeah, but with the truth, mostly. I figured it might work on a bleeding-heart Gryffindor."

Hermione scoffed but considered it. If anything would have worked, this was his best shot. "Well played. Maybe you are more snake than ferret," Hermione mused.

"Please don't voice those sorts of thoughts out loud," Malfoy grumbled.

Hermione laughed, surprised, an awkward tension hung in the air.

"So?" Malfoy asked. "Do we have a deal?"

He held out his left hand. Hermione walked cautiously towards him and then gripped his hand with her left, their right hands occupied with their wands.

"No," Hermione said. Malfoy looked hurt for a split second and then angry, trying to free his hand from her grip.

"But," Hermione continued while trying to hold him there for a second more. "I have a counter-offer."

Malfoy paused and watched her suspiciously. Hermione freed their hands when he made no inclination to move away.

"As you have said, I am a Gryffindor at heart. As one, my emotional reactions tend to be… honest."

"So?" Malfoy was analyzing her as he tried to follow her train of thought.

"If you want me to stop looking at you like that, you'll have to prove to me you aren't that person anymore," Hermione summarized.

"Done," Malfoy grabbed her hand again quite willingly, startling Hermione.

Hermione paused to regroup, not expecting such an immediate reaction or such a positive response. She quickly ran through her statement to see what might be manipulated by him. It was a very one-sided agreement that put the cards in her favor, as far as she could tell. It was based on her own judgement and really not an agreement at all, just a challenge directed at Malfoy.

He crossed the roof and opened the door to the stairwell.

"Come on, know-it-all, before your brain shorts out from too many neurons firing at once."

Hermione raised an eyebrow at him, "Not off to a great start, Malfoy."

Malfoy shrugged, the wind lifting his hair softly around his face. "I'm not a saint, Granger. And I'm definitely not Scar-head or Weasel."

Hermione quirked her eyebrow farther, crossing her arms.

"No deal, Granger. You aren't turning me into a pansy."

Hermione snorted and Malfoy narrowed his eyes.

"I don't want you to turn into Parkinson either," she quipped.

Malfoy groaned. "Just get inside, Granger, who knows what catastrophe the ankle-biters have gotten into."

Hermione, detecting his words were a possibility, followed.

As they climbed back down, Hermione realized something, "Malfoy, you were listening during that lecture about neurons?"

"What, surprised someone else pays attention in physiology?" Malfoy said over his shoulder.

Hermione merely met him with a pointed glare.

Malfoy sighed. "Yes Granger, it's important to several spell theories."

"But it's mainly _muggle-borns_ who think that."

Malfoy rolled his eyes, "So as a pureblood I can't say it has credence?"

Hermione supposed she had to give him the points this round, but his words triggered something else. "Malfoy… the pureblood thing. When you begged me not to say anything?"

"Of course, still keep it to yourself." Malfoy answered.

"But why?"

Malfoy paused as they reached the entrance to the 'club.' "Granger, I told you I wasn't going to become like one of your friends as part of this deal. That certainly means I'm not going to suddenly have your 'heart-to-hearts,'" He sneered.

"Malfoy!" Hermione called angrily but he was already through the door, reversing the transfiguration of a quill flopping about on the floor. She grumbled angrily under her breath and followed.

...

When Hermione exited the bedroom after flooing home, she was startled by Luna sitting at the kitchen table. Luna was sitting upright, her normally dazed expression a little sharper. It reminded Hermione of her mother waiting for her father to come home when they were going to have a 'discussion.' This immediately made her wary as she approached Luna.

"Why are you home so early, Luna?" Hermione asked, glancing at the clock.

"Your school owled," Luna said simply.

"About what?" Hermione asked, running through a seemingly uneventful day.

"You were going to the hospital because you mixed potions improperly."

"Oh, but that was yesterday."

"Yesterday was too chaotic to leave, but Rolf felt guilty so he told me to come home early today to handle it."

"Oh, sorry they called. It's nothing. I'm fine now."

"Hermione Granger, don't lie to me!"

Hermione straightened a little and watched Luna, puzzled. Luna held up the dreamless sleep and sleep draught vials.

"Both of these were full when I unpacked them two weeks ago. I don't know of any creatures that will consistently feed off sleep draughts this strong and this bottle is more than half gone!"

"I've just had problems sleeping, Luna."

"No, there is something wrong with you, Hermione, and you refuse to talk about it."

Hermione sighed, and rubbed her head, unused to Luna's aggressive side.

"Fine, I have nightmares that keep me up for hours. I use these draughts so they won't wake me up in the middle of the night and I can keep a regular schedule."

Luna waited, head tilted slightly to the side.

"I've been fine, really!" Hermione protested. "The problems I had after the war just suddenly started up again last year. I'll figure it out."

"But that's silly," Luna replied gently.

Hermione looked up quizzically.

"I'm not as clueless as Ron. I know that you are not as strong as you pretend," Luna continued and Hermione bristled. "You don't have to 'figure it out' alone when you have friends to help. Like me, we're friends."

"That's true. Thanks Luna." Her words dissipated fears Hermione didn't even know had been weighing her down. She felt her posture ease more upright.

Luna smiled and got up from the table to open the fridge.

"Pudding?"

"Actually, I'm ravenous. Yes please."

Luna pulled out an Eve's pudding and Hermione's stomach grumbled.

Once they both had been served, Hermione asked a little worriedly, "Did the owl interrupt anything important?"

"It was a pigeon, actually. Most city wizards use pigeons. It came when a client was trying to convince us to exploit the Demiguise we have under our custody. We all wanted to cast a tongue-tying curse on him anyway."

Hermione half choked on a piece of apple as she started to laugh.

As they ate Hermione continued to quiz Luna about the latest happenings at work. She even tried to covertly glean more information about Rolf Scamander's apparent crush. However, Luna seemed oblivious to her attempted intelligence work and his overtures to pureblood flirtation, so Hermione's curiosity was left unquenched.

* * *

Thanks you guys for the reviews and welcome to my new readers! I'd love to know what you think of this chapter ;)

Have a good weekend!


	15. Salem's Shop

Luna and Hermione decided to go to wizarding NY the following day. Hermione needed an alternative insomnia cure and Luna needed a list of ingredients with purposes unknown to Hermione. They were walking along the streets of muggle NYC when Luna suddenly pointed across the street and said something Hermione couldn't make out over the traffic. Hermione started to yell back but Luna flitted across the street. Before Hermione thought to follow, the 'don't walk' sign flashed and she decided not to race the light. Hermione watched Luna's progression by tracking it between the traffic. A little ways down the street, Luna tapped someone on the shoulder.

Hermione's view was suddenly blocked by a young man who seemed to be trying to get her attention. Covertly, Hermione palmed her wand under her jacket.

"Er... yes?" Hermione asked, assessing him for any threat.

"You're Hermione Granger aren't you?" the random young man said enthusiastically.

"Erm... yes," she answered, calming slightly as she remembered this kind of behavior from after the war. She leaned around him to see the man Luna was talking to and saw Draco Malfoy! What was Luna doing with Draco Malfoy, she wondered a little frantically.

"I'm in your Healer's class!" the young man continued. She nodded absently and did a quick perimeter check to make sure no one was using this kid to ambush her.

"Okay?" Hermione said as she scanned the other side of the street for a possible attack. Malfoy had also looked around before turning sharply to say something to Luna.

"My cousin came home from Hogwarts last year and told me all about you and Harry Potter!"

"That's nice."

Luna started talking and Malfoy leaned slightly away, looking progressively more uncomfortable.

"-and how you saved his butt in the second wizarding war-"

Luna reached up to touch Malfoy's shoulder. What happened, Hermione wondered frantically, why is she doing that?

"-and Harry Potter saved everyone by beating he-who-must-not-be-named in an one-on-one duel and-"

Hermione's breath hitched. "Please, stop talking. I don't like talking about it," she said sharply, anxiously glancing at the light. Malfoy had stared at Luna's hand for awhile before putting his own hand over hers very lightly.

"But nothing fazes Hermione Granger! You're like a pillar of knowledge and magical prowess-" Hermione tuned out what sounded like a direct quote from one of the newspapers. Malfoy seemed to be saying something, his head bent towards Luna's. She was nodding in that careful, gentle way of hers.

"-made sure Harry Potter stayed alive through all his Hogwarts years to-" the young man continued to rant, waving him arms around to emphasize points.

The wide gestures set Hermione on edge as she had to focus on him to make sure he was going to attack her. Hermione gritted her teeth and glanced impatiently between the young man, the light and the scene unfolding across the street. Just as she was sure she couldn't resist strangling the kid, the 'walk' sign finally lit up. With barely any apology to excuse herself, Hermione rushed across the street.

She walked up behind them just as Luna reached up and pulled Malfoy down into a hug. Malfoy stiffened and very awkwardly shifted his hands around Luna, patting her back lightly. The unpleasantly wired feeling from the previous conversation was still vibrating through her body, urging her to tear him off of Luna. Hermione paused a few steps away, fighting an irrational urge to throw a spell in the middle of these muggles. However, Malfoy looked up, probably sensing her stare. He met her eyes, his own unguarded and sad, and, startled, she forgot what she had been planning to do. Luna stepped away and, seeing Malfoy's line of sight, turned to Hermione.

"Hermione!" Luna called as if nothing unusual had happened. "Isn't it a coincidence that Draco is here as well?"

Hermione replied noncommittally.

"He was just telling me-" Luna started before Malfoy's hand jumped to cover her mouth. It never made it there because Luna had stopped at the sudden motion. Malfoy quickly retrieved his arm.

"Erm… I was saying I needed to get some potion ingredients." Malfoy finished.

"No, you must have meant to say that," Luna corrected. "But Hermione is also looking for potions. She needs some stronger-"

"Luna!" Hermione tried to cut her off.

Malfoy's head had already snapped in her direction. "Sleeping draughts?" he finished.

Luna was already nodding and so Hermione gave up trying to protest.

"You should try Salem's Shop," Malfoy said. When Hermione didn't respond, he continued. "The owner is very knowledgeable about potions and how to mix ingredients."

"Is that the place you were going to buy your potions?" Luna asked

Malfoy paused and then eyed Hermione speculatively.

"Would you show us the shop?" she cut in. Malfoy's eyebrows furrowed. Breezing through his confusion, Hermione turned to Luna, "do you need any potion ingredients?"

"Perhaps he will have Boomslang's skin?" Luna answered.

Malfoy glanced between the two girls before he shrugged nonchalantly, "it's plausible."

As they walked on, Luna began to quiz Malfoy on other ingredients.

"What about moondew? That one isn't very well stocked in the potion stores that I have visited."

"I know he has that one," Malfoy nodded.

"And dittany?"

Malfoy rubbed the slight stubble on his chin. "He stocks dittany seeds, you'd probably have a better chance at an herbology shop for that."

"Oh, those shops are always infested with blibbering humdingers," Luna replied offhandedly.

Malfoy looked back at Hermione with a raised eyebrow. Hermione, waiting to see his reaction, smirked back at him. He narrowed his eyes and turned back to Luna.

"Well, if you don't want to buy from the herbology shop, then I guess you could always go to a muggle nursery," he suggested as if they were having a normal conversation.

"Why would I want to go to a place that cared for young muggles? They don't scare off blibbering humdingers."

"Erm… no. A plant nursery," Malfoy corrected

"Oh, well they would have the same problem, wouldn't they?"

"What?" Malfoy asked, slightly annoyed.

"The blibbering humdingers, of course," Luna answered.

"Of course," Malfoy said sarcastically, his signature sneer slipping onto his face.

"You know how to keep them away though, Luna?" Hermione interrupted. "Could you grow them from the seeds at the shop?"

"Oh! And then we could use the mooncalf dung to help it grow!" Luna replied excitedly.

Hermione shot a triumph smile at Malfoy. He rolled his eyes and turned his back on her. Hermione continued to smile, feeling like she had won part of their 'bet' because he had slipped back into his unpleasant mode.

He must have sensed this, because as they neared the potion shop, he sent another narrowed glance in her direction. Once they reached the door he swept it open and, with an exaggerated motion, ushered them inside.

"As this _lowly, dastardly man_," he began, the sarcasm drenching his words and face as he shot a pointed look at Hermione, "let me begin to make amends with this _small chivalrous act_."

Hermione couldn't help but snort quietly.

Luna accepted his offer, walking through the door, and said, "That is kind, Malfoy, but if you continue to act like that people will believe you've been 'imperio-ed.'"

Hermione grinned. Malfoy directed another glare at her and mouthed 'satisfied?'

Hermione's grin only grew larger as she accepted his 'chivalry,' but she kept an eye on him as she passed by.

The shop was poorly lit, lending an almost creepy vibe, but Hermione had to admit that it was well-stocked. She supposed the dark coolness would be downright pleasant if it was the middle of the summer and also helped the potion ingredients keep for longer. She was admiring a bottle of dragon scales when she heard voices on the other side of the shop.

"Luna!"

"Oh, hello Rolf."

Hermione peeked over the top of the shelf. She quickly found Luna, her hair highlighted by the sunlight filtering through one of the windows. Beside her was a man in his mid twenties, his brown hair slightly receding at the temples. He wore very proper dress robes, although the patterns were a tad unusual.

"What are you doing here on your day off?" Rolf asked.

"Hermione needed some potion ingredients and I came to make sure she got them."

"Hermione, your roommate?"

Hermione was surprised that Rolf already knew who she was.

"Yes, that's right. She's somewhere around this shop."

Hermione ducked down behind the shelf, hoping to give them some more time without her.

"I guess she is off arguing with Draco," Luna continued.

"But then why do you have moondew in your hand?" Rolf changed topics.

"Oh, well, with all of the bad luck the Pisky have brought, I decided to restock the Wiggenweld potion."

"Luna, you didn't have to do that-"

The rest of what Rolf was saying was lost on Hermione as someone interrupted her.

"Granger, what are you doing on the floor?" Malfoy asked.

Hermione jumped before glancing up and making a hushing motion.

He raised an eyebrow, "Granger-"

Without thinking, Hermione reached up to grab Malfoy's robes and pulled.

"Merlin, Granger!" he hissed as he was pulled off balance. He automatically crouched down next to her, careful to brush the dirt off of himself.

"What on Merlin's pointy beard are you doing? Are you trying to spend a small fortune on damaged potions ingredients?" he spat as he gestured to the shelves.

"Shhh! Luna is talking to Rolf!"

"Is that supposed to mean something?" Malfoy asked and leant around the shelf to get a look. "Some celebrity crush? Edit the most recent copy of 'Hogwarts: A History?'"

Hermione rolled her eyes, "Wow, how original, Malfoy. Teasing me about books and being a 'know-it-all?'" She used finger quotes to emphasize her distaste at the last phrase.

"Oh, you earned the title all by yourself at Hogwarts. From what I see, not too different here either?" he sneered.

"Have not!" Hermione replied indignantly. She really had tried not to be so bossy around her classmates once Harry and Ron had made it clear they didn't appreciate it.

"So your assignments for the next two weeks aren't all done and notes color-coded?" Malfoy raised his eyebrow.

"No!" Hermione would normally have been loathe to admit this, but ironically she was now using it as ammunition.

"Oh?" the other eyebrow joined the first one.

She ignored him, refusing to be baited farther.

"There's something Granger doesn't understand? Or, wait, you're slacking?" he asked this with an almost malicious smile.

"Hardly, just… the most recent project… I've got noonetopracticeon." Hermione regretted the sentence the moment she opened her mouth and mumbled most of it.

Malfoy leaned closer and cupped his hand over his ear, "What was that?"

"Nothing! Why did you even come over here?"

Malfoy felt around on his robes until he pulled out a vial. "Valerian," he explained. "Mixing this with other sedatives is a bad idea, but Sam says it's effective."

"Effective for what?"

"Insomnia."

"Malfoy…" Hermione started. "Why are you helping me?"

"Right, as the big bad evil Slytherin, I must have an alternative motive?"

His face was tight and then Hermione remembered, "Oh, the overdose."

"None of your damn business!" Malfoy started to get up angrily.

"Found them," Luna's voice came from above them. Hermione looked up to see Rolf join Luna, who was peering over the bookshelf.

"Er… Hi?" Hermione asked, realizing the awkwardness of the situation.

"Hermione, what are you doing on the floor with Draco?"

"He was… showing me Valerian." She gestured at the vial.

"Was it on one of the bottom shelves?"

Instead of answering, Hermione stood up, brushing her robes.

"Luna, will you introduce us?" she asked, turning to Rolf.

* * *

What is it with these guys and awkward situations...


	16. In which there are introductions and fishbowls

Luna tilted her head. "But Hermione, you already know who Rolf is."

"A proper introduction would be greatly appreciated, Luna," Rolf agreed with a hint of affection.

"Well, Rolf, this is my friend, Hermione Granger, she was born in England and attended Hogwarts with me."

"Pleasure, Miss Granger," Rolf held out his hand.

Hermione reached out to shake his hand and was startled when he gently grabbed her hand with his instead. He turned her hand so that its palm was facing down and leaned over it, executing a sharp little bow, before releasing her hand. Completely blindsided, Hermione nodded back in acknowledgement and hesitantly pulled her hand back.

"Likewise… uh Mr. Scamander?" she tried to match his stiff politeness, although it felt odd calling such a young man by the title 'mister.'

Rolf turned towards Malfoy with a straight posture that would appear militant except that it was countered with clean cut clothes in warm 70s-esque prints. The overall effect was a stuffy uni professor who had taken a reverse-aging potion. Hermione couldn't decide whether to be amused or slightly intimidated by this young man.

Luna, understanding Rolf's unspoken desire, continued. "This is Draco Malfoy… he is a pureblood. He attended Hogwarts too but we weren't friends back then."

Hermione turned her attention to Malfoy to see his reaction to the exposure of his blood purity, but he was just eyeing Rolf warily. Rolf made a small bow in Malfoy's direction. Malfoy, after a moment's hesitation, mirrored the action, matching the angle, to the degree, of Rolf's bow. Afterwards, Malfoy quickly straightened and turned away. He met Hermione's eyes briefly before becoming fascinated by something over her shoulder.

She was quickly checking to make sure no one was behind her when Luna leaned closely to Hermione and said in a stage whisper, "Rolf likes to strictly follow wizard etiquette. Don't let that deter you, he is still a very nice man."

Hermione nodded back, attempting a smile at Rolf.

He returned it with a small smile of his own before interjecting a short cough and turning to Malfoy.

"Have you been formally introduced to Miss Granger?" Rolf asked.

"Er…" Malfoy turned his attention back to the group. "That won't be necessary. We don't-"

"No, this is Hermione Granger, the muggleborn who rivals any pureblood. It would be a great honour, don't you think?"

Hermione bristled and Luna placed a hand on her arm.

"Rolf still believes the wizarding community paradigm that magic is inherited incrementally instead of discretely." Luna informed her gently.

Hermione answered with a frown.

"Don't be upset, your abilities can help him begin to overcome his prejudice!" Luna whispered excitedly as Rolf introduced Malfoy to Hermione.

Hermione resisted the urge to roll her eyes but didn't remove her slight frown. She was sick of all the talk of blood purity, in any form. In the aftermath of war it had been overly focused on, even if it was in an attempt to ensure equality.

When Rolf finished the introduction Malfoy straightened and turned to face Hermione resolutely. He took a breath and reached his hand out to Hermione. Assuming that he wanted to do the same thing as Rolf, she thought about it for a second before offering her own hand. He softly cupped her hand with his and leant over it. Then his head tucked down and his lips barely grazed the back of her hand.

Hermione started and jerked her hand back. Malfoy stood up slowly, seeming unfazed by her reaction.

"Miss Granger," he said dryly.

"Ma- Mister Malfoy," she replied, attempting not to sneer the name, unconsciously cradling her hand against her chest.

"You sound like our Hogwarts professors," Malfoy gagged. "You shouldn't call me that again."

"Of course, _Mister Malfoy_," Hermione jibed to break the atmosphere and because she couldn't resist irritating Malfoy, even if she agreed with him.

Once introduced, Rolf seemed content to ignore them in favour of talking softly to Luna. Hermione made a show of looking at her watch.

"I suppose I'll come back later, I've got an appointment I need to get to," she said.

Rolf and Luna barely looked up from their conversation. Malfoy checked the time on the grandfather clock in a corner, "I'll come with you, Granger."

Hermione gave him a puzzled look, "Okay?"

"Good luck with your… appointment," Luna said, a little too obviously.

"Thanks Luna, I'll see you back at the apartment," Hermione replied. She escaped out of the front with Malfoy tailing her. She threw an uncomfortable look over her shoulder at him before speeding up her pace.

"Although Luna might, I don't invite your presence, Malfoy," she said as sped up.

"I actually have an appointment, Granger," he snarked back. "Although," he groused with no real hostility, "I'd taken any excuse to get out of that beastly mess."

"What exactly happened back there?" Hermione asked, her curiosity getting the better of her. She couldn't understand anything that would make Malfoy willing touch her, let alone with his lips.

"That Rolf chap was a dandified ponce and I went along with it so as not to look like… a ruddy chav!"

Hermione chucked dryly, "but what about," she gestured vaguely, not sure she wanted to voice what had happened aloud.

"Granger, I don't enjoy being consulted as a walking encyclopedia, unlike some people."

"No, you're just a fruit machine that spits out insults every time someone pushes one of your buttons!"

"Fruit machine? If anyone here is a fruit machine it's you. You were never this easy to wind up back at school."

"You weren't practically _stalking_ me either."

"I'd say it was the other way around. Besides, it's a small wizarding community, it's not that surprising we would run into each other."

Hermione sniffed before switching the subject, "Malfoy, why are you avoiding what just happened?"

"All it was a greeting between… well-" Malfoy rubbed his forehead and stopped talking. He threw her an irritated glare under his hand. "Granger I am going to avoid it because no matter how I try to explain it, you're going to bite my head off."

Hermione started to express her disbelief but Malfoy cut her off.

"No matter how I spin it, when I explain it's going to sound like I represent the purebloods values. I don't feel like being chewed out for something I don't even believe anymore!"

"Oh," was all Hermione said as she considered this. After a pause she asked, "It was pureblood etiquette?"

Malfoy nodded, his face unreadable. They both slowed as they came to the exit to muggle NYC.

"No wonder I didn't know about it," she muttered.

"That's what you were worried about?" Malfoy asked, strangled.

"Partially-" Hermione looked back at Malfoy, her brain beginning to formulate questions at this new source of knowledge.

"Absolutely not!" Malfoy crossed his arms and scowled. "I'm not an encylopedia!"

"Sharing some information hardly-"

"I'm done with this rubbish!" Malfoy interrupted, throwing up his hands and began walking towards the mosaic wall. "I'm already going to have to see you on Monday, might as well get as much Granger-free time as I can," he snarked before escaping wizarding NYC.

Hermione rolled her eyes and turned to small entrance that lead to the therapy clinic. She entered the door and started up the stairs with her brain still slightly preoccupied by the previous events; however, soon her brain caught up with her current surroundings. The wood stairs creaked under her weight and frayed her nerves each time one gave away her exact location. She tried to block it out, but very quickly a sense of dread was dropping over her. About half way up the stairs she cracked and 'muffliato-ed' her feet. At the top of the stairs she paused at the door before opening it a sliver, secretely surveying the waiting room.

There didn't seem to be anything overtly amiss and so Hermione forced herself across the threshold. Bland dated music hummed softly in the background and potted plants framed the window. Several glass bowls lined the walls, containing small colorful fish that flitted lazily through the hazy water. There wasn't anyone sitting in the stuffed chairs but a perky, perfectly coiffed, girl sat behind the glass in the front desk. Hermione woodenly made her way over to the girl.

"Hi! What can I do for you?" the girl asked.

"First time appointment," Hermione muttered at her. Seeing this girl, a paragon of all things normal and healthy, made her feel almost alien. It felt like this girl lived in a different world from her nightmares and panic attacks. What was she even doing here, Hermione wondered, these people hadn't gone through the second wizarding war. How would they understand anything she was going through? The girl had gotten the papers out and was compiling them on a clipboard.

"Just feel these out-" the girl started, handing Hermione the clipboard and a pen attached to a garish fabric flower. Hermione reached her hand half way out and saw it visibly trembling. She stopped and withdrew it.

"Actually, I want to cancel-"

"Granger? Blimey…"

Hermione paused at the voice of none other than Draco Malfoy. She turned to see him coming in from a door on the opposite side of the clinic as the one she entered.

"Malfoy?" she spat harshly. Caught in this position of vulnerability, all of Hermione's defenses shot up. "What are you doing here?"

"Same thing as you, I suspect," Malfoy said dryly.

Her mind already on the topic, Malfoy's presence only triggered more of her memories. The fish bowls reminded her of the shelves of prophesies with their murky almost white swirls of water.

"No, no. Nonono," Hermione tried to blink back the images. Lucius Malfoy's taunts. Feeling helpless under Dolohov's wand. "No, I'm not doing this." She backed away from Malfoy towards the door she had entered by, away from the images that invaded her mind. Her hand reached blinded behind her for the doorknob.

"Coward," Malfoy casually mocked.

Hermione's brain stopped short and anger suddenly flooded in. "Take that back, you spineless ferret!" She snarled.

He didn't even blink. "I'm not the one running away before the gate's even open," he nodded towards the papers the receptionist still held hesitantly in her hand.

Hermione hesitated, eyes shifting between the papers and Malfoy's face.

He stood there coolly, meeting her eyes, but not glaring.

"Guess you really are the coward, then?" he said softly, folding his arms.

Enraged, Hermione stomped up towards him. "Shows what you know!" she snapped. Never breaking eye contact with him, she snatched the clipboard and the flower-pen from the receptionist and stomped over to a chair. After collapsing violently into it, she started filling it out, giving Malfoy death glares every couple seconds over the top of the clipboard.

Preoccupied with Malfoy, her answers to the questions were concise and short so she made it quicker through the paperwork than would otherwise be normal. She made a show of returning the papers when she was finished and Malfoy snorted softly.

When she returned to her seat, Hermione's mind cooled enough to actually puzzle about why Malfoy was in the same clinic as her. As he stated earlier, there seemed to be only one logical explanation, but what exactly did that imply? She snuck several secretive glances his way as she puzzled. Malfoy did not respond except to return her gaze with a raised eyebrow several times.

Someone calling her name startled her from her thoughts. She looked up to see a older man standing in the doorway.

"Miss Granger," he said sedately, "please follow me to my office."

Hermione got up and shot one last glower at Malfoy before moving to follow the gentleman. In response, Malfoy crossed his arms, leaned back in his chair, and smirked.

* * *

A/N: What do you know, there is a kiss in this chapter ;) (Though a real kiss is a very very long way off.)

As always, I'd love to hear your guy's opinions! Anything you expect/want to see in the next chapter?


	17. In which there are explanations

When they arrived at the therapist's office, he directed her towards the comfy arm chair across from his desk. Hermione sank into it, angling herself so that the door was still in her field of vision.

The man leaned over his desk to collect a pen and notepad, some of his gray hair escaping its small pony tail to fall into his face. The room appeared to have come straight out of a magazine shoot. It was impeccably arranged and decorated, with no clutter and only a few exotic but tasteful decorations on the side table and desk. The only obvious magical touch was a framed picture on his desk of a large group of wizards waving at the camera. Hermione assumed from the varying ages that it was a family picture, but it was too small to make out any faces.

"You are Hermione Granger, yes?" the man asked as he sat down in his own chair at the desk.

"Yes, was it Dr. Burnell?" Hermione returned and he nodded in confirmation.

"Hermione, I understand," he started as he scanned her paperwork. "That you came in for anxiety related issues?"

Hermione gave a curt confirmation.

"What would be your main concern in coming here today?" he asked.

She paused, her eyes wandering the room as she considered his question. She paused at a set of tribal masks propped over the bookshelf.

"I'm not certain. I was using potions to help with the nightmares but the effect seems to have diminished. Right now I can just slip out of class if my flashbacks get too bad. My roommate has commented that I'm angrier recently but I haven't really noticed... I guess I'm really here because of the hospital... and Harry."

He nodded and scribbled on his parchment. "Who is Harry?" the therapist asked.

"A very good friend who lives in England."

"And you are from there as well?"

"London, yes."

"Why did you come over to the United States?"

"Well... it's actually complicated."

The therapist merely nodded and waited for her to continue.

Discomforted by the silence, Hermione did continue, "Several years after the war these... symptoms suddenly came back. Throwing myself into my schoolwork didn't seem to help."

Hermione trailed off and Dr. Burnell looked up from his notes. "And then?" he prompted.

"I came here."

"But why did you come?" he asked patiently.

"I came for Healer's school."

"Surely there are good schools in Britain?"

"I was hoping the change of scenery would help."

"Was that all?" Dr. Burnell asked. Hermione shifted uncomfortably, events from the day flashing into her mind.

"Maybe, because I actually am a coward," Hermione answered at length, mostly as a whisper to herself.

"Why would you call yourself that?"

Hermione looked up and met his hazel eyes. "A young man I don't like accused me of being one today. I told him he was wrong but..."

The therapist waited.

"I always seem to be running away. I never used to do that."

"Running from what?"

"Ron, myself, the war... everything?"

"Ron?"

"My ex-boyfriend."

"You are running from him?"

"I thought we were over, but then... other things happened." Hermione bit her lip and sighed.

"So you avoided it by coming to America?"

"They all expected me to marry into the family. They were so excited and didn't seem to hear my protests and it didn't help that Ron insisted I'd come back around. I think it had become something to obsess over ever since Bill and George were hurt and Fred... died. I thought I didn't want to hurt anyone... but I was just being a coward."

"Why does that make you a coward?"

"Because even when I knew we wouldn't work out, I led him on!"

"You entered the relationship in good faith, didn't you?" the man was no longer writing, and was earnestly looking into her face.

Hermione wiped her eyes and nodded.

The older man noticed and nudged the tissue box towards her. She took one and cleaned her face, blowing her nose as gently as she could.

"You eventually did end it, and Ron understood it was over?"

"At first… and then when I thought we were friends again he accused me of leading him on still. So, maybe I was still using him?"

"It doesn't sound like you were using him," Dr. Burnell said gently.

Hermione looked up into his wrinkled face, wishing she could believe him. Instead, she just shook her head.

"It is natural to feel hesitant to leave a relationship. It sounds like you handled it maturely."

Hermione again shook her head, feeling ashamed.

"What do you think you did wrong?"

Hermione met his eyes, and truly considered the question.

"I should have seen that we wouldn't have worked out. I... I-" she paused and remembered Ron's angry words. "I shouldn't have led him on."

"When you began the relationship, did you think that it wouldn't work out?"

"No, I had been in love with him for years!"

"Then, you were short-sighted, but does that mean you need to blame yourself?"

Hermione twisted the tissue in her hands.

"Did you purposely lead him on? Did you want to hurt him?" the therapist continued.

Hermione shook her head angrily, twisting the tissue harder.

"We all make mistakes and misjudgements and nothing works out exactly how we want it to. Do you expect yourself to be perfect? To know exactly how everything will pan out?"

"I should have seen it!"

"Why? What makes you better than everyone else, that you can't make mistakes? Why should you have seen it? Did someone warn you? Have you been in this type of relationship before?"

"No," Hermione grumbled angrily and folded her arms across her chest.

"Then why should you have known?"

"Because I'm Hermione Granger! I know everything!"

The therapist didn't quite cover his snort of laughter in response. "You do?"

"Well, no," Hermione answered, mollified. "Everyone just expects me to."

"No one can know everything, can they? That is a rather impossible standard."

Hermione was surprised when she teared up in response. "No, I suppose not."

They were silent again. Hermione was distracted by the sensation of the tears hesitantly sliding down her cheeks.

"Was Ron one of those who expected you to know everything?"

Hermione winced. "There is nothing wrong with Ron!"

"That's not what I asked."

Hermione bit her lip again. "It's not that surprising… to him it probably seemed like I did."

"Oh?"

"I have a lot more book smarts than him."

"How did Ron feel about that?"

"About what?"

"Having a girlfriend smarter than him?"

"Well, I was always the smart one."

"So he just assumed you knew everything?"

"Yes, basically? Unless it was 'men's work' as he put it."

"Hmmm…" Dr. Burnell hummed to himself.

"What does that mean?" Hermione asked.

"Well, it certainly is getting interesting, but I'm afraid that we're out of time."

Hermione glanced at the clock. The hour had gone quickly. The reminder of where she was pulled her mind into sharper focus and away from the reminiscence of the past.

"You are good. That ability is worthy of a Ravenclaw... or maybe a Slytherin."

Dr. Burnell stood up and, at this, gave her a small smile. "I'll assume you meant that has as a compliment, seeing as I am quite lost by that statement."

They started walking out of his office and she explained, "Ravenclaw is a house at my old school, they were known for being intelligent."

"Were you in that house, then?"

"No," Hermione continued before Dr. Burnell opened his mouth, "Slytherin is a house known for being sneaky and underhanded and... well, evil."

"Maybe not so much a compliment, then," the man returned dryly.

"That was just a prejudice, although slightly self fulfilling. I meant you can be very good at being sly. I almost didn't notice how well you led me with your questions to confront my own cognitive distortions."

"I'm not trying to trick you, dear," he said, gently patting her shoulder.

Hermione looked down at his gnarled hand. "I know,"-or, at least, she hoped. "See you next week." She waved a hand.

"Looking forward to that, Miss Granger," he replied with a nod of his head.

* * *

A/N: So I'm really curious what you guys think about this chapter. Boring? Information overload? Whet your curiosity or sate it?

I based this off of my own counseling experience but if anyone wants to put their two-cents in about their own I'd love to hear another perspective.

Have a good weekend!


	18. In which Hermione is surprised

After such an eventful weekend, Hermione welcomed school and it's more simplistic demands. Her new friends from her group greeted her and asked after her health, and she in turn artfully dodged their questions; answering only that she had found a new sleeping aid that wouldn't land her in the hospital again. She settled into the rhythm of classes and school work as well as helping John with his school work, although not to the degree she had helped Ron and Harry in the past.

Thursday came quickly, which didn't register with Hermione until she walked out into the living room that morning. Bright pink streamers were strung across the ceiling, as well as several butterbeer bottles. On the kitchen table sat a pitcher of pumpkin juice and a steaming plate of pancakes. Luna was humming tunelessly as she flipped another pancake on the stove. When she heard Hermione, Luna turned and greeted her cheerfully.

"Happy Birthday, Hermione!"

"Thank you!" Hermione answered, her mood brightening.

"I've made bacon banana pancakes, come sit down and we can eat them."

"You did mention that you liked those," Hermione said to hide her misgivings. She sat down at the table and was distracted by a high pitched buzzing from what she had assumed was another empty butterbeer bottle in the middle of the table. It was part of an arrangement that also included a maneki-neko (or lucky cat) and a mixture of orchids, miniature roses and dittany blooms.

Luna joined her at the table with the most recently made pancake and noticed Hermione's gaze. "Pretty aren't they? I wanted to make sure your birthday attracted friendship, health and good fortune. Rolf let me borrow some of the faeries from the office to help."

That was when Hermione noticed the flickering light in the butterbeer bottles. "Are they okay?" Hermione asked worriedly.

"Oh, yes. I made sure to leave them all enough space and enough nectar to keep them entertained for several days. I also put the ones that got along best together, knowing you would think of their welfare."

"That's really sweet of you, Luna." Hermione decided to leave the topic of magical creatures alone and instead poured the syrup liberally over her pancakes. She cut a bite of pancake and ate it thoughtfully. Used to the odd tastes of wizards, Hermione found she could enjoy the strange mixture of flavors. "Where did you find the recipe?"

"I was sharing recipes with a muggle I met at the ice cream shop. She said she thought my custom ice cream was a good combination and so we started talking about food we liked."

There was a unique breed, Hermione thought. "That was a fortuitous meeting," she said instead.

Luna agreed and they turned their attention to eating. Once she was finished, Hermione again thanked Luna for her thoughtfulness for her birthday and then got ready to leave for school.

"Hermione, do you plan on spending the whole of your birthday on schoolwork?" Luna asked as Hermione moved to the fireplace.

"It's a weekday," Hermione replied. "I need to stay on top of my homework. We're celebrating on the weekend, anyways."

Luna smiled and nodded. Hermione nodded back, surprised by the lack of argument, and floo-ed away

At school they had just started studying some of the basic healing spells. In one particular class period, they focused on how to use the spells in a more emergent situation, considering that these spells would be some of the first they needed to use.

Throughout the class, John would glance at her and give her a small smile, like they were sharing a secret. She was at a loss as to why, though; she didn't think they had talked about any of these spells before. One of the spells, 'episkey', was pretty common, and most witches and wizards had learned and performed it. Hermione wondered if she had ever demonstrated it for him and that's what triggered his glances.

After class, as the groups started to break off and find each other, John looked like he was about to say something several times. Hermione, not liking the strange tension from John's actions, almost told him to just spit it out. Instead, the other people in their group joined them and they began to fall into their familiar patterns of pairing.

When Daryn took his usual spot across from her, he smiled and said, "Happy Birthday, Hermione!"

Hermione smiled back, "Thanks!"

Upon hearing this, the other people in her group joined in.

"Yeah, Happy Birthday!"

"That's exciting."

"Any grey hairs coming in, Granger?"

"Thanks guys!" Hermione smiled back at her group, basking in the momentary cheer. Then she addressed Malfoy, "At least I don't bleach my hair to hide them."

"Hey, this is completely natural!"

"Pity," Hermione said with a sly smile.

"Your hair looks gorgeous, Draco," Sharon added. "But, you know that."

"How did you know?" Hermione asked Daryn, she knew she hadn't slipped that information into their conversation.

"Oh, Luna mentioned it when I met her last week."

Hermione nodded and turned their attention to the healing spells.

It was a spell that they had already reviewed because of its more complex nature. It was a spell similar to a calming draught, but used by charming a person's voice.

"I find it too similar to 'imperius' to be comfortable using this frequently," Hermione said.

Daryn nodded in understanding.

"Didn't you research it, Granger? There are several points that put this spell firmly under light magic," Malfoy interrupted.

"Oh, because everything published by a government is completely trustworthy. Right, Malfoy?" Hermione answered with a roll of her eyes.

Malfoy raised an eyebrow. "Just watch, Granger." He cast the spell and continued, "You shouldn't be worried about using the spell. It only allows them to relax enough to understand what you are trying to say."

Hermione felt her anxiety about spells similar to the unforgivables slide towards the back of her mind. "But can't you just sedate them enough to just follow what you are saying?" she reasoned.

"You should just believe me," Malfoy replied. "Stop worrying and do the spell."

Hermione scoffed.

"See?" Malfoy asked.

"See what?"

"I tried to get you to do something, did you feel compelled to do it?"

"No, if anything my mind was clear enough to curb my desire to tell you you are complete bugger for trying to coerce me."

Malfoy raised his eyebrows and smirked.

Hermione caught what he was trying to imply and huffed. "Fine, I'll admit you are right this time around. I'll try it, but you better tell me what happens. _Sedatis_."

Hermione paused and looked at Malfoy.

"You have to actually say something for it to work," he sneered.

"Like what?"

"Usually something soothing," Daryn joined in. "Like: Everything's going to be okay. Please relax. Or something similar."

"Everything will be okay. Relax," Hermione parroted.

"Oh, Granger is telling me to stop being uptight, that's rich."

Hermione narrowed her eyes and concentrated on channeling her energy as she spoke the words. "Stop talking, Malfoy, and relax."

Malfoy blinked rapidly, "And telling me to shut up too… oh no!"

"Stop it and relax, Malfoy!" Hermione tried again.

Malfoy's eyes slid shut and he crumpled onto the ground.

"_Finite_!" Hermione yelled panickedly. "_Rennervate_! Malfoy!" She bent down to shake him.

Malfoy groaned and batted her hand away. "What the hell, Granger?"

"He will be fine."

Hermione stood up and spun around at the voice of Professor Greythorn, "Professor!" Feeling slightly light headed from quickly standing up, Hermione opted to sit in her chair.

"There are much more magically efficient ways of knocking a person out, Ms. Granger."

"I wasn't trying…"

"It appears you need to focus on practicing this spell to understand the intricacies involved on spelling your voice to affect others."

"Yes, Professor," Hermione replied dutifully, trying to hide how despondent those words had left her.

Hermione spent the rest of the class period with Daryn trying to master the spell that apparently eluded her. At the end of classes Hermione grabbed her bag and stalked off, determined to research until she understood what exactly she didn't understand.

"Wait a second, Hermione," Daryn called her back.

Hermione turned around questioningly.

"Should we let her go back?" Daryn asked the rest of the group.

"Let me?" Hermione echoed, incredulous.

"Luna said to take her directly there," he continued.

"Luna? Daryn, what are you talking about?"

"You mean we were able to pull this over on you without you having a clue?" Malfoy asked as he hefted his backpack onto his shoulders.

"You too? What's going on?" Hermione asked.

"Guess, Granger. It's your birthday and somehow everyone knows and is trying to drag you somewhere. This must mean-" Malfoy left the last bit hanging with an expectant smirk.

"Surprise birthday party?" Hermione filled in.

"Exactly!" John said with a huge grin while Malfoy rolled his eyes.

"But Luna promised…" Hermione muttered to herself.

"Are we all apparating together?" John asked.

"No, meet at Daryn's place," Malfoy interrupted. "Because of Jordan, Ari and the muggles."

"Because what?" Hermione asked.

Everyone ignored her and began to make their way to the fireplaces.

"Is everyone purposefully keeping me in the dark?" Hermione asked with frustration.

"Of course, Hermione!" John answered cheerfully. "It is a surprise party!"

"Come on, guys, let's floo to my place," Daryn said.

Hermione hung back as he stepped forward.

Daryn looked back, "You do want to go, right?" He asked hesitantly. "Luna assured me that you would enjoy it…"

Hermione sighed. Luna saying that she would enjoy it either assured that she actually would enjoy it or that she would absolutely hate it. It was her birthday, Hermione mused, and with present company it would at least add some of the excitement she sometimes missed without the crazy Weasley clan and Harry. She nodded.

Daryn smiled, threw the floo powder and called out his address. John grinned at Hermione as they followed him into the fireplace.

"Crazy golf?" Hermione asked incredulously once they arrived. For all Hermione could tell, it was an indoor themed adventure miniature golf course. Everyone piled into the front entrance and Daryn was tried to get a headcount to tell the boy at the cash register.

"Yes!" Luna affirmed. "Daryn suggested an amusement park, but I said it might be too crowded. Besides, it's pirate-themed!"

"Is that why you are wearing a bandana and a corset top?" Hermione said with amusement.

"Yes, I wanted to match the mood, what do you think?" Luna said as she spun once to show it off.

"You always have amazing outfits, Luna," Rolf said from behind her.

He's absolutely smitten, Hermione thought with a smile as she maneuvered to a spot where she could observe with her back to a wall. Luna had been right when she said that an amusement park would be too crowded. Even with just the ten people in the room, Hermione was starting to feel overwhelmed. Maybe they wouldn't even notice if she slipped out the door. No, Hermione resolved, she was going to stick this out. She carefully trained her breaths and flagged Luna over when their eyes met.

"Luna, playing crazy golf with nine people is going to be too chaotic."

"Don't worry, we agreed to stagger it out. This place has arcade games, dodgems and a mini-auto race track too."

"Wow," Hermione said. "You put a lot of thought into this. Thank you, despite the fact that you did it behind my back."

"Okay, everyone!" Daryn shouted from the front. "We're all doing a round of mini-golf but we'll split up into two groups." There was immediate shuffling as everyone sorted themselves in groups. Daryn, John, and Sharon immediately grouped together and Jordan followed Daryn. That left Rolf, Luna, Malfoy, and a young boy that Hermione hadn't yet been able to meet. Hermione debated the pros and cons of joining the two groups. Mainly, she was considering the boy.

He looked so much like a first-year Harry with his dark wavy hair and solemn little face. Their gaze met, and the same uncertainty in the world shone in his eyes that Hermione remembered seeing in Harry's. Especially in some of the early photographs she had seen from their first year. Hermione decided to join his group on the sentiment that she was somehow making sure he wasn't picked last, as if it was a little kid's game.

* * *

Surprise? I guess we'll how well Hermione can keep it together...


	19. In which there is unsolicited advice

Luna and Rolf surprised her by being rather good at crazy-golf. When she mentioned this, Luna smiled secretly and Rolf glanced towards her with his own small smile.

"We were here last week to make sure it was proper for your birthday," Rolf replied.

"But Rolf decided it would take three or four rounds to be absolutely sure," Luna added. Hermione thought Luna might have been teasing him.

Malfoy and the boy's run didn't go as smoothly. Malfoy let the boy go in front of him and stood near by, watching his swing. The boy swung wildly and managed to nearly smack Malfoy in the face. Malfoy blocked it with his arm and then swore loudly.

"This isn't a baseball bat, Ari!" He growled, rubbing his arm.

Ari bit his lip and didn't say anything.

Luna squatted back on her heels so she was Ari's height. "Lot of wizards think the only sport to exist is Quidditch and haven't even heard of the other very fun games you can play. Have you ever played golf, Ari?"

Ari shrugged.

Luna glanced up at Rolf. "Rolf is becoming very good at harmonizing with his swing."

Rolf's eyebrows slightly raised as he caught on to Luna's train of thought.

"Here, young man," he said. "I will show you the basics of a golf putt." After a demonstration, Rolf began a long winded explanation about elbow angles and feet directions.

Ari stared at him blankly.

"Rolf," Luna interrupted. "Too many suggestions at once draw the wrackspurts."

Rolf looked up from his demonstration and then glanced down at Ari's flummoxed expression. "Ah, I see you are right, Luna." He turned to the boy. "How about you take a whack at it, then? Just make sure the only thing whacked is the ball."

Rolf turned a good-natured smile towards Malfoy who returned it with a slight scowl.

After a quick glance between the two men, Ari made another clumsy attempt. It managed to miss the ball, but he didn't hit any people either.

"No, no, no!" Malfoy shook his head impatiently. "Like this." He nudged Ari's legs into place and grabbed his arms. Malfoy then took Ari's arms through several swings. "You got it?"

Hermione pursed her lips in disapproval and looked back at the boy to see his reaction. Ari just shrugged again.

"Okay, take another swing." Malfoy took a large step back.

The boy managed a ricocheting shot towards the hole.

Luna and Hermione cheered and Rolf gave Ari a single pat on the shoulder.

"There, you'll catch on soon enough," Malfoy said once it had stopped rolling.

Malfoy took his shot and ended up close to the hole. Once it was her turn, Hermione set down her ball and took a couple practice swings to wake up her muscle memory. With that, she tapped her ball right between Malfoy's neon orange ball and the hole.

"Granger!" he protested, narrowing his eyes at her.

"Why don't you just hit her ball out of the way?" Ari asked, resting his chin on his club and staring up at Malfoy with his wide dark eyes.

Hermione frowned. "What have you been teaching him, Malfoy?"

Malfoy smirked at the boy. "Didn't have to, he came that way. Slytherin in the making"

Hermione rolled her eyes and noticed the boy flinch imperceptibly.

Apparently ignorant, Malfoy muttered, "I'm planning on it, but now I don't have a clear path to the hole anymore."

Luna and Rolf had already moved on to the next hole so it was Malfoy's turn again.

"I could just hit it right back to the start," he threatened.

"So you're going to cut off your nose to spite your face?" Hermione asked in mock horror.

"If you were my nose, yes I would," Malfoy replied.

"Malfoy…" she said, indignant out of habit.

"Oh, shove it! Quiet while I make my shot."

He turned his back and settled into his stance, putting the ball as if he were just going to go through her own ball. His ball shot into hers, transferring most of it's momentum, and her bright sky blue ball was sent right into the hole with a clunk.

"Ha!" Hermione shouted in childish triumph. "Hole-in-one!"

Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Only in the loosest terms available."

"Is that legal?" Ari asked.

Malfoy shrugged.

"Not in real golf, I'll replace it if you want," Hermione answered as she walked up and fished her ball out of the hole.

"Just take the boon, and stop trying to be all noble and Gryffindor about it, Granger," Malfoy interrupted, waving her away.

Instead of joining Luna and Rolf at the next hole, Hermione hung back and watched. Ari barely missed the hole, and Malfoy put his own in. On his next turn, the boy was also able to tap his in.

"Brill!" Hermione smiled at the boy.

However, the boy just gave her a small furrow of his eyebrows, "What?"

"She means well done. Here, give me five!" Malfoy stuck his palm out at the boy. After a moment of consideration, the boy slapped Malfoy's hand with his own.

Hermione rolled her eyes and continued onto the next hole.

"Really," Luna was saying. "Aim slightly left so the snoogeralfs don't pull your ball down the hill."

"I don't know, Luna," Rolf said as he seriously considered the angles and his ball. He squatted down and peered down the green with one eye. At the end of the run was the classic windmill, slowly rotating.

Rolf's ball rolled straight for the opening in the windmill but was soundly blocked by one of its arms. Luna timed hers correctly but it bounced back off the wall next to the opening. As they walked out towards their balls, Rolf reached his hand out to Luna to take her club. Luna slipped her hand into his instead. Rolf rapidly looked from their hands to Luna's face several times. Tilting her head to one side, Luna returned Rolf's glance with a bemused smile and then squeezed his hand.

Neither Ari, Malfoy nor Hermione's balls made it past the windmill, but both Luna and Rolf got through on their second try. As Luna and Rolf walked down the slope to where their balls have rolled, Luna slipped her hand into Rolf's again. Slightly surprised again, Rolf glanced at their hands before staring at her face in wonder. Luna continued on, gesturing with her other hand, blithely unaware of his reaction.

Suddenly, there was a loud crack by Hermione's head and she dropped to the ground. Spinning on her toes, she pulled out her wand in her crouched position.

Back towards the beginning of the hole, Ari stood with his mouth open and Malfoy still had his wand drawn.

Seeing red, Hermione marched towards him. "Malfoy!" she yelled, slightly hysterical. "What the bloody-"

"Whoa, Granger, I was only-"

"-hell do you think-"

"-using a 'Protego' charm-"

"-you are doing!"

"-if you thought to ask!"

Hermione paused slightly in front of him and huffed. "What!?"

"I'm sorry!"

Hermione frowned at Ari, who had spoken. "What?"

"No, no, Ari. Don't apologize. That's bad form." Malfoy interrupted.

"Can it, Malfoy. What do you mean?"

"I'm sorry I hit the golf ball at you. I didn't know it would go that far," Ari said, biting his lip again.

"Golf ball?" Hermione repeated.

"Yes, the golf ball, Granger. The one that set you off on a witless rampage?" Malfoy goaded.

"Isn't this a muggle place?" Ari interrupted. They both looked at him. "Wands?"

Hurriedly, they both put theirs away, and Hermione looked around frantically for any security cameras.

"So,"-Hermione composed herself- "you mean a golf ball hit the side of the windmill and nobody was trying to murder me?"

"It was an accident!" Ari cut in, agitated.

"Yes, don't worry." Hermione crouched down in front of him. "I know that now. I just over reacted. I don't like being startled."

Malfoy snorted.

Ari cocked his head to the side. "Why?"

"Why what?" Hermione asked.

"Why don't you like being startled?"

"Oh." Hermione looked away and searched for words. "I- I'm used to that sort of thing being dangerous. My reactions are left over from a different part of my life."

Something sparked in Ari's eyes. "Oh."

Hermione was taken back by his reaction, he actually seemed to understand what she meant.

For the rest of the holes Luna and Rolf maintained a conversation about magical creatures that Hermione had never heard of. Luna would make comments about little discoveries she had made or potential places to go. Rolf would answer thoughtfully, though at least half the time he disagreed with her. Neither of them seemed perturbed by it, and both looked to be enjoying their conversation. It probably didn't hurt that their fingers remained entwined for most of the time.

Ari gradually got better, despite the impatient tutelage of Malfoy. Hermione winced at Malfoy's continuing off-handed insults about Ari's shots. The boy didn't react, but Hermione remembered what Malfoy's comments did to her her first few years in Hogwarts. It was easier for her, he had been a peer. For some strange reason this boy looked up to Malfoy; he would be even more vulnerable to Malfoy. She let it boil under her skin a little before grabbing Malfoy's shirt arm and dragging him to the side.

"Granger, I already apologized," he sighed exasperatedly.

"No," Hermione hissed, making sure they were hidden by a hideously sculpted pirate. "This is about Ari!"

Malfoy's stance stiffened. "What about him?"

"Stop making hurtful remarks about his shots!"

"What are you on about?"

"You are making fun of him!"

Malfoy shook his head incredulously. "No, I'm not. I'm teasing him."

"Maybe, if he was an adult." Malfoy just shook his head as she continued. "I remember how cutting your remarks can be! I think I'm better qualified to make the judgement call!"

Malfoy winced. "No, this isn't the same thing," he insisted. "I'm just treating him like a little brother."

"Where did you get the idea that this is how you did it?"

Malfoy scowled and crossed his arms. "What do you care?" he sneered.

Hermione paused and then noticed that Luna had walked over to join their conversation.

"Hermione, it's not his fault that he doesn't have a good model for being a good brother," she commented.

Malfoy rolled his eyes and then raised an eyebrow at Hermione.

"Malfoy, your efforts are commendable. It's just you're missing the balancing of negative with positive comments to make sure he doesn't think you hate him."

"Hate him?" Malfoy asked. He glanced at Ari, who had been caught up in another of Rolf's demonstrations.

Hermione tried to follow Luna's lead. "Not yet. Just try to compliment him too, Malfoy."

Malfoy raised his eyebrows at her again. "Granger, do you even know how to give a compliment?"

"She's better at telling people what to do," Luna supplied.

Malfoy gave a startled chuckle. "That doesn't come as a surprise."

A little irritated and embarrassed, Hermione automatically whacked him on the arm.

"Oi!" He rubbed his arm indignantly. "Granger if you don't stop attacking me I will retaliate."

She felt a tinge of embarrassment redden her cheeks. "You... just reminded me of Ro-" She trailed off when she realized what she was about to say. "Nevermind."

Malfoy tilted his head to the side and gave her a strange look but didn't comment.

For the rest of the game Malfoy made an effort to make positive comments. However, they were ruined (at least for Hermione) by the fact that he would shoot her looks right after he said one. As far as Hermione could tell, Malfoy was trying to get points in their 'bet'. She was sorely tempted to explain that obviously pointing out when he did something good would not convince her that he had changed. She didn't feel like dragging him off to try to explain it so she just shot sarcastic looks back. Besides, she could put up with Malfoy for the slowly growing smile that would grace Ari's face.

At the end of the course Hermione managed to tip her ball into one of the better scoring holes and was feeling pretty good about her score. That is, until she saw Luna's.

"Luna, how did you manage to get this low?"

"I did tell you that Rolf and I practiced before," Luna said, smiling in her dreamy way towards the said man.

"Well, as you said earlier, I didn't think wizards played this game, but, out of all of you, Ari is the only one who has never done it."

Luna shrugged slightly, "Perhaps it's due to the American wizards having less aversion to muggle culture?"

Hermione glanced quickly towards Rolf's direction before muttering, "That's not the impression I got when I met Rolf."

"With Rolf, you have to sneak these up on him so he doesn't have the chance to be scared of any startling lifestyle revolutions."

"Does seem like a traditionalist," Hermione agreed. "Is that what you are doing with the hand-holding?"

"Isn't that what you do with close male-friends? Like you with Harry and Ron?"

Hermione paused at that. "Well, yes. But we were really close, and they didn't take it the wrong way… or at least they didn't until,"-Hermione sighed- "Blokes tend to take that as a signal, Luna."

"Oh, and what did Ron-"

"Great! You guys are done!" John interrupted and waved his hand cheerfully at them. "We just finished up with an air-hockey tournament."

"Who won?" Hermione asked quickly.

"Shandra, actually. But I had her on the ropes for awhile."

Rolf, who had been returning their clubs, looked up sharply. Malfoy noticed and patted him on the back a little awkwardly.

"Don't worry," Malfoy confided. "John just means he almost beat her at the game."

"Ha ha. As if," Shandra answered as she followed John into the room. "I sank the puck past him without even having to try." Shandra examined her manicured nails and raised an eyebrow at John. "You might want to rethink who exactly was on the ropes."

"Hey, take a chill pill." John flashed his brilliant smile. "I'm just joshing."

At this, Shandra merely rolled her eyes and ignored him. "We're all going to do a round of bumper cars." She caught Malfoy's eye and smiled. "Draco, let's go over to the bumper cars!"

Malfoy had just come in and was returning his and Ari's clubs. Malfoy glanced down at Ari and asked, "What do you say? Bumper cars?" He mimed turning a steering wheel.

Ari smiled shyly and looked up hopefully. "Can I drive?"

* * *

And we get some early 2000s slang ;)


	20. In which there is smashing

They headed towards the bumper car arena with everyone chatting exuberantly.

"Unicorn horn is needed in many potions used commonly in magical healing. Why hasn't the department for Magical Creatures ensured a safer route to obtain this ingredient?" Shandra asked as the conversation turned to everyone's career fields.

"We find that the Unicorn's dislike for mankind has dampened efforts to make such a thing possible," Rolf replied.

"Yes," Luna cut in. "The American ministry is still uncomfortable forming an all woman department based solely on the more feminine traits rather than what they would consider true qualifications."

Shandra sniffed her disdain.

"The worry is based more on how well they would handle other situations," Rolf hastened to reply.

"Like what?" Shandra asked petulantly.

"There is worry that they would not be able to police the trafficking of unicorn products with enough strictness."

"Or some politician is worried they won't be as easily corrupted?" Shandra supplied instead.

"Do you have something similar to head girls in your magical schools?" Hermione joined. "They showed themselves to be quite capable of policing rowdy teenagers, the fear of all sane people."

"Oh, does that mean you are volunteering to be one of the pure maidens who tend the unicorns?" John asked.

"I don't like magical creatures enough," Hermione replied.

"Didn't Luna say you spent much of your time with the Professor of Care of Magical Creatures?" Rolf asked with confusion.

"Only because he was my friend. As long as they are treated well, I'd rather leave it to people who are more interested," Hermione said with a shrug.

"What about you, Shandra?" John asked teasingly. "Still want to be a pure Unicorn maiden?"

"Still?" Hermione was puzzled.

Shandra rolled her eyes. "Daryn's cousin let it slip at Daryn's music show that I used to really like Unicorns and the like."

"No," John added with delight. "He said you wanted to be the Unicorn and Fairy Princess!"

Shandra merely rolled her eyes again. "I was ten years old. I've decided to be something different when I grow up."

"Why do that when you could get your old dream?" John asked with a chortle. He turned to Luna and Rolf. "Couldn't you make the ladies' titles Unicorn Princess?"

"Shut up, John!" Shandra snapped.

"What?" John genuinely looked uncertain why she was upset.

"You are implying that a job reserved for women shouldn't be taken seriously when you mock it," Luna replied.

They had crossed from the indoor building to the outdoor bumper car arena. Looking back, Hermione saw that Daryn and Malfoy had been held back, chatting as they walked behind their two young charges. Jordan was happily rambling to Ari who listened solemnly and only replied monosyllabically.

Upon seeing the cars, Jordan jumped with excitement. "I want to go with Ari!" Ari swallowed but then smiled.

With the other people in line, there were only four cars left for them. "I could go with the children," Hermione offered. The three men looked at each other before all disagreeing out loud.

"I'm not going to share a car with another guy!" John said hastily. "I'll go with Hermione."

"Erm, thanks?" Hermione muttered, surprised when he wrapped his arm around her elbow.

"I'll go with the children," Malfoy herded them towards a car. "You'll just have to sit on my lap, Jordan, okay?"

Everyone else followed and settled into the cars. As the arena was turned on, and all the motors rumbled to life, John managed to knock into several cars before anyone had gotten their bearings. Hermione groaned and rubbed her neck.

"Now everyone is going to be after us!" she accused John.

He flashed her a grin before pulling them into a near 90 degree turn and rushing towards Malfoy's and the children's car.

"John, slow down!" Hermione admonished.

Malfoy looked up and saw them. "Turn right, Ari!" he commanded. They were jerked around as Ari attempted to turn. "No, no. The other right." They hadn't managed to move out of the way before John was on them and Hermione partially covered her face. He hit them on the back of their car, causing them to spin around towards John and Hermione. Noticing his position, Malfoy smirked.

"Step on it, Ari!" He said, pointing their car directly towards the side Hermione was on.

Hermione's eyes widened and she shook John's shoulder. "Hurry up, hurry up!" She nearly yelled at him. Rolf and Luna's car blocked in front of them and so John attempted a tight turn. Bumper cars were not designed for tight turns and Ari smashed his car into theirs. Hermione fell forward against John's shoulder and was pretty sure she was going to have some whiplash.

"Turn around and hit them back!" Hermione commanded. They backed into another car before heading towards Malfoy's car. Malfoy and the children were neatly caught in place by the positioning of several of the other cars. As John maneuvered towards the other car, Hermione yelled at Daryn and Shandra, who were part of those cars.

"Shandra, keep Malfoy where he is!"

Shandra looked up to Hermione's car and back towards Malfoy.

"You wouldn't dare!" Malfoy said, half-outraged.

At that, Shandra smiled. "Try me, honey." With that, she expertly veered her car to cut off Malfoy's escape.

Seeing Malfoy tighten his grip around Jordan even as the girl did the same, Hermione muttered, "Don't hit them too hard, John."

John obliged, mostly, and with a cheery wave to Shandra and Daryn, they sped off to find more victims. John was good at this, Hermione decided as they hit several more cars broad side, but her neck didn't like this game very much. Towards the end, Hermione noticed that Luna and Rolf had avoided most of the chaos by casually driving towards the outside of the teeming mass of cars. Hermione pointed them out to John, and, with a grin, he turned their car towards Rolf.

"Oh, look, Rolf," Luna said as she pointed towards Hermione. "Someone has decided to hunt us out."

Rolf looked up to see them and then turned to Luna. "What do we do now?"

"Scream, I think," Luna replied and then screamed melodramatically as John's car closed in.

Hermione was completely blindsided by the scream that she didn't notice the other car until it had already hit her right after the first impact with Luna's car. She turned to get a good look of who it was even as the ride began to shut down. It was Malfoy's car but he was pointing innocently at Ari, who was grinning.

"You?" Hermione asked with mock shock and Ari grinned wider. She shook her head and smiled back.

After the games, everyone gathered to return to Daryn's house for dessert.

"Who knew Hermione had a wild streak?" John asked as he slapped her back.

Relaxed, Hermione laughed. "I'm just more impulsive when I have adrenaline in my system. Who knew Ari would be such a good driver?" Ari had picked up driving the miniature cars on the race track with the same ease as he had the bumper car.

Ari smiled shyly.

"He does seem more adept at muggle contraptions that the average wizard," Rolf agreed.

"Probably because he is good at the hard sciences," Malfoy replied. "The muggles use those a lot."

Ari's smile wasn't as big now and Hermione glanced at him worriedly.

"So, cake and ice cream?" Daryn asked, and everybody answered with enthusiasm.

Daryn's apartment was relatively nice, but it was obvious it was occupied by all males. Several posters covered the walls of both magical and non magical music artists. Some of the posters, like the ones of Aaron Carter and the Backstreet Boys, had silly things in speech bubbles scrawled across them in a black sharpie.

Sitting down with her cake on a sofa, Hermione was surprised when Shandra sat next to her.

Partitioning off a piece of the cake with her fork, Shandra said casually, "You know, I just thought you always had a stick stuck up your… you know."

Surprised, Hermione merely watched the piece of cake slip into her mouth.

"But, you were pretty fun today." Shandra paused again to scoop up some ice cream.

"I just take awhile to warm up to people," Hermione defended herself.

"I saw how you treated Draco. You said you guys have known each other for a long time."

"He is an exception," Hermione's voice darkened as she remembered their 'long time.'

"But he is such a good guy."

Hermione raised an incredulous eyebrow, smashing the cake into her ice cream to try to dissipate some of her irritation.

Shandra snorted lightly and directed Hermione's attention towards Malfoy. "Look at that and tell me he is not a good guy." Jordan, apparently very comfortable in Daryn's apartment, was hanging off of Malfoy and nearly spilling cake on his shirt. He bore it patiently as he listened to the conversation between Ari, Luna, and Rolf.

"If his old classmates saw him, they would be speculating whether it was a bet or an Imperius," Hermione replied

Shandra sighed, exasperated. "Remember when you ripped me one for insulting all purebloods?"

"Yes?" Hermione asked.

"I have good reason to hate them. But you were right, I shouldn't hate on all of them."

"Thanks?"

"Just because you are hurt, doesn't mean you should breathe hatred either. I'm not asking you to forgive him. Just, stop spewing poison at him every time he breathes."

Hermione raised her eyebrows at that.

"You really do." Shandra shifted her hair over her shoulder. "It's painful to see you take any kindness he has and shove it back in his face. Especially when he just takes it as if he thinks that's all he is worth."

Hermione opened her mouth to ask if they were talking about the same person, but Shandra cut her off.

"Of course you don't see it. Are all you English people so prickly, or did we just get the luck of the draw with you two?"

Hermione tried a smile as she poured the now soupy cream across the rest of the cake.

"Look, I'm starting to like you, but I like Draco too. Once I figured you weren't a prissy know-it-all all the time, I knew you needed to hear it straight."

Hermione stared her down, waiting to see if Shandra planned on continuing to insult her.

"Anyways, how are you doing on Professor Greythorn's assignment?"

Happy for the topic switch, Hermione groaned aloud. "She didn't give us nearly enough direction on how to adapt it to the individual patient!"

"John and I decided to partner up and practice after class. Once he actually understands the spell, he can usually figure out the nuances pretty quickly."

"Really?" Hermione asked, surprised, before taking a sip of her butterbeer. "That sounds like a good idea. Maybe I'll ask Daryn."

"Good luck." Shandra scooped the last of her ice cream into her mouth before elaborating. "If you came to his music gig you'd know he is amazing. They've been getting booked a lot more often and Daryn is getting his studying in between sessions."

Hermione expressed her admiration even as her mood fell a little. How was she going to practice? Rolf continued to find excuses to get Luna out during the evenings.

"Oh! It looks like they are going to play a few songs for us, Herms!" Shandra said and tugged at Hermione's sleeve. Hermione gagged at the nickname but allowed herself to be pulled into the living room where the band was setting was instruments, noting to correct Shandra the next time she attempted to use that atrocity as a nickname.

"We soundproofed the walls after the fifth or sixth time the police showed up at our door," continued one of the band members who was a little more heavy set. He wore a tie-dye shirt and had a several day old beard.

"Only that many?" Malfoy said sarcastically.

"We like to be good neighbors," the band member replied, either missing the sarcasm or enjoying the irony.

"We'll start with a cover of #41 by the DMB," Daryn announced when everyone was in place. After an introduction of the drums, they began. The drums were a little heavier and the vocals were sung less gently and with more crooning, but Hermione recognized the song. Mainly, Daryn stayed on the saxophone, but occasionally he would do some background singing with his nearly bass voice. A little into the song, Jordan convinced Malfoy to stand up and 'dance' with her, which consisted of mostly him spinning her around the tiny space left in the middle of the room.

At the end of the song everyone clapped enthusiastically. Hermione had to agree with Shandra's assessment. The band was a little rough around the edges and hadn't yet managed to develop any flare for performance, but they were a good band that played well together.

"Here, sign my napkin for when you are famous," John joked and waved his ice cream stained paper napkin.

Daryn merely shook his head with an amused smile and the band played a Bruce Springsteen cover. This one Jordan decided to do a twisting dance to, pulling Malfoy's hands with her. After that one was finished and sufficiently praised, the band started in on their last song, one that they had written.

Hermione could tell right away that it was meant for a magical crowd.

_"Oh, baby cast a love spell on me_.  
_ Her ruby lips make it hard to breathe_.  
_ With her fingers on that wand_,  
_ I feel like a wizard James Bond..."_

The lead singer sang soulfully into the microphone. Hermione couldn't help cringe a little at all the cliches strung together, but the music itself helped to sooth over the painfulness of the lyrics. At the end of the song, she joined in with the clapping and smiled broadly.

Hermione went up to exchange a few words with Daryn, reiterating all the praise that he had already been given that night.

"You've got a brilliant voice and that saxophone solo was very impressive!"

"Thanks, Hermione." Daryn gave her a small side hug and smiled down at Jordan who was begging for music. At Daryn's admission that the band needed to practice in earnest, everyone began packing up the party to leave for the night. With a chorus of promises to see each other the next day at school, the rest of the group trickled out to floo home.

As Hermione got ready to leave she heard Malfoy and Ari talking as they headed down the hallway towards the fireplace.

"What did you think of the muggle entertainment, Ari?" Malfoy asked.

"I... thought it was fine," Ari replied.

"Aren't you King of the Understatement. It's easier to get away with a lie directly to someone's face if you've got a lot of money backing you up." Malfoy rested his hand on the back of the boy's head. "Got a twenty?" Malfoy joked.

Ari considered. "Only for somebody I really need to believe me."

Malfoy chuckled and ruffled Ari's hair. "Very cunning. Like catching Granger and Thomas while they were intent on Loony."

Ari smiled and pulled Malfoy's hand off of his head.

"Ari?" Malfoy started uncertainly. "I... uh. Granger was irate earlier... she thought I was insulting you. You know I'm just teasing you, right? I... I thought you picked up how to swing a club quickly, considering it was your first time."

"Don't listen to Granger," Ari comforted Malfoy and patted his arm. "I don't need... what did you say? Gryffindork love?"

Malfoy laughed, sounding relieved. "You remember that? You're a protege. I want to see you and the Weasley clan together just to see their faces!"

Hermione shook her head as she heard Malfoy call out his destination. "Once a Malfoy, always a Malfoy," she muttered to herself but smiled a little at the thought of the Weasley boys being called 'Griffindork's' by such an innocent looking little boy. "Some Weasley Wizarding products would certainly be involved," she muttered to herself with a laugh. It had been awhile since she had thought of those boys with happiness instead of sadness. Her smile remained even if a small tear escaped her eyelids as she remembered her boys.

* * *

Once again, thank you so much to my faithful readers and reviewers. It really means a lot to me. You're my motivation for continuing this story.


	21. In which there are feces

The clearing Luna picked out for their star gazing and feces-collecting was accessible only through a hike starting at the Wizarding NYC. Therefore, that Saturday Luna and Hermione set out in the rose-tinted dusk towards an area where Luna knew there would be moon-calves that night. Their wands emitted lights that mimicked that of a firefly. Luna said they were less likely to scare any creatures away than a normal 'Lumos.'

"Couldn't they have set at least an apparition point out in the middle of the woods instead of warding the whole area?" Hermione asked.

"This way the moon calves and other creatures are less likely to be disturbed," Luna answered as she avoided a bigger rock in her path.

"But what about you and Rolf? Isn't it time consuming to walk all the way out here on foot?"

Luna sent Hermione a half smile. "We fly."

"On brooms. I forgot that not everyone is sensible enough to avoid those things."

Luna laughed lightly. "I won't think poorly of you because your fear of heights prevents you from using a common magical item."

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Right." She had become mostly adept at ignoring things like this from Luna. "When is Rolf coming?"

"Oh, he has something to clear up about unicorn exports that required an international portkey."

"Why didn't you go with him? You seem to always be gone for something or other when I'm home." Hermione didn't quite resist the pout when she complained to her friend. "Why are you gone so often? I didn't think you would want to be gone so long for a job?"

"I decided you needed someone to come with you." Luna said, only answering the first question. "I told Rolf you had to walk out because of your fear of heights and he could catch up by the time we got to the clearing." Luna flicked her wand and several firefly-lights flitted about before skimming along the ground to highlight the uneven surfaces.

"Don't you want to be home sometimes?"

"Why, do you need me home?"

"I need a practice partner really badly. I'm going to fail if I don't figure out this set of spells."

"What about your study group?"

"They're not my-" Hermione thought better of trying to correct a nuance and continued. "They are either paired up or busy and the only one left is Malfoy."

"I heard him complaining about his schoolwork too yesterday. Wouldn't it be better if you worked together?"

"That better be a joke."

Luna merely gave her another lazy smile. Hermione scowled and conjured more fireflies.

"Not too many," Luna warned. "We don't want it to look unnatural."

They continued on in silence for awhile, the cool air whispering through the trees. Instead of being able to enjoy it, Hermione was only on edge. Frustrated, she shook her head. Out loud she asked, "So what do you both need moon-calf patties for?"

Luna answered, "Growing the dittany, remember? All of the shops are infested with blibbering humdingers."

"And the dittany?"

"To restock our essence of dittany. I've needed to use it more often because of the Pisky."

"You might not be able to restock it very quickly..."

The conversation dissolved into the technicalities of growing dittany and potion making for a period of time. Then the rushing in the winds changed pitch behind them and Hermione cut the conversation short and spun with her wand ready to confront whoever was behind them. Rolf pulled up short and smoothed his hair as he watched Hermione's wand.

"Aren't I expected?" He asked.

"Not on a broom and why is it so noisy?" Hermione grumbled to cover her still racing pulse.

"It's an older model. It's not built for speed, but it's a sturdy model. I know it won't fail me on a long ride." Rolf glided to the ground and displayed his broom with pride. The bristles splayed out but the handle itself was thick and solid. It wasn't sleek and shiny like the ones that Harry and Ron drooled over, but Hermione felt that if she had to trust her life to a broom she would much rather ride this one.

Rolf nodded to Hermione but his eyes were for Luna. Luna's hands swished her skirts around her ankles and she smiled her not-quite-smile and waited for him to come to her.

"How did the unicorn exports go?" she asked.

"The Australians didn't realize that for me it was several hours after working hours instead of an hour before lunch," he grumbled.

Hermione hung behind and let their quiet chatter wash over her and ease her anxiety. When they came upon the clearing they were met by a beautiful view. The leaves had started to change colors and in the tinted light of sunset their yellows, pinks, and orangey-reds were still visible clustered between the trees and brush. The ground was covered in swaying yellow wildflowers. It should have been peaceful, Hermione knew.

"The department approved magic use that doesn't disturb the natural environment," Luna commented as she tapped Hermione's shoulder.

"What?" Hermione asked.

"You can set up detection or protection spells. That is why your wand hand keeps twitching, isn't it?"

Hermione offered a pained smile. "That obvious?" She trudged off at a half jog to finish securing the perimeter before it became completely dark. As she set up the familiar spells she constantly was glancing over her shoulder or out into the gloom to make sure there really wasn't anyone else there. She hadn't gotten used to the sounds of the forests enough again to be sure a leaf falling or a small animal wasn't actually a foot step. As she finished, her breath was slightly elevated, and when Luna addressed her, Hermione jumped.

"Hermione?"

"Yes, finished."

"Hermione? I thought going outdoors would chase away some of your wrackspurts, but they only have seemed to increase…"

"No," Hermione interrupted. "It's fine. I'm fine. We'll just find these… feces. They are important for growing your dittany, aren't they? Don't worry about it, Luna, I'll be fine."

Luna pulled in her bottom lip and nodded.

Hermione set off on a purposeful stride away from the others and didn't look back to see what they ended up doing. The clearing itself was about a half kilometer in length, and by the time she reached the other end, Hermione could barely hear Luna and Rolf. At first, she tried a systematic approach of combing the grass in straight lines. However, upon finding the first couple in slightly more trampled areas, Hermione realized that it would be better to follow the designs made by the mooncalves. Shaking her head at not realizing this earlier, she began following the patterns. As she began to find less and less patties, her mind was allowed to wander more frequently to the darkness just beyond the wildflowers. The thought of what lay beyond pushed her hunt further towards the middle of the clearing, into the full moonlight. Finally, when she could find no more and had filled the bag she had brought, she collapsed onto the ground and curled up into a ball to protect against all the dangers her mind was making up. Her breathing had become more shallow and fast. Flashes of memories started running through her head: Ron leaving her and Harry, the snatchers surrounding the tent, Ron bleeding out on the forest floor, and the images continued. Her rocking intensified as she tried to block it out. Suddenly, something brushed her shoulder.

Hermione was on her feet and had twisted to face her attacker with her wand out before she had registered anything else. Instead, Luna stood with her hand slightly outreached and Rolf standing behind her.

"Luna?" Hermione panted.

"Yes, I was going to tell you we were done as well. Hermione are you-"

"Don't," Hermione interrupted, "ask me that."

"You are crying," Luna said instead, pointing to her face to indicate where the tears were on Hermione's face.

"Oh." Hermione rubbed her face with the sweater she was wearing and tried to calm down her breathing.

"Ms. Hermione, what is the matter?" Rolf asked as he took a step forward.

Hermione flinched.

"The war," Luna explained. "Hermione has been very affected by the war."

Rolf looked to Hermione. Hermione nodded without meeting their eyes, feeling irritated about the whole thing. "Being out here… in the dark and... with it so quiet… it just makes my hair stand on end. I'm waiting for it to… start again," Hermione muttered between breaths.

"I can take you back on my broom," Rolf offered.

Hermione took a step backwards.

"Rolf," Luna chided. "Heights terrify Hermione."

"Oh, that's right. You told me that earlier. Hmm…" Rolf adjusted his glasses as he thought. "We could fly really close to the ground." He demonstrated with his hand.

Hermione considered. "What about Luna? Can all three of us fit on that broom?"

"Of course we can, we're all friends aren't we?" Luna cut in.

"Luna… I don't see how being friends-" Hermione started.

"Come, we can at least try," Rolf said instead.

With Luna snuggled up behind Rolf there was indeed enough room for Hermione. She looked at the intimacy of her friends' position and decided to slip onto the broom facing backwards. Her back pressed up against Luna's and Hermione's legs hung on either side of the broom bristles.

"Ready," Hermione called. "Remember, stay VERY low to the ground."

Rolf made a noise of agreement and pushed off. Luna giggled and Hermione felt Luna lean away from Hermione. Losing her firm back, Hermione automatically gripped the bristles in a death grip.

"No leaning or that will interfere with the steering!" Rolf yelled over the wind.

"I know!" Hermione managed although her heart was beating so quickly she felt like it was going to stop her breathing. They had picked up to a rather fast pace and Hermione watched the ground buzz past her feet alarmingly. Dizziness and nausea fought each other and she had to tear her eyes up to look at the fast diminishing moonlit clearing.

This isn't any worse than riding on a motorcycle, she tried to reassure herself. Then her mind brought up all that statistics of how many people die riding motorcycles. If it didn't require her to relinquish grip of one of her hands on the broom, she would have transfigured a helmet. However, it did require that, so Hermione held on to the broom and stared grimly at the trees silhouetted against the stars. It would have been a beautiful view, free of much of light pollution of the big city, if Hermione's brain hadn't been occupied with other things. After a bit, Hermione had a feeling that she had gained some height. Looking down, it appeared they were almost a meter above the ground.

"ROLF," Hermione managed in a terrified half-scream. "If you bring it any higher I will JUMP OFF!"

"Huh? Oh, apologies." Rolf brought the broom down so that their feet were again barely above the ground.

Hermione could barely feel her hands anymore, between the cold and her tight grip. The trip was taking too long, and she thought she might be becoming light headed due to not breathing properly and not just fright.

Breathe, breathe, breathe! she chanted at herself. If you fell off, the worse that could happen is a couple broken bones, she reasoned. Or smash your head and become brain-dead for the rest of your life, the other part of her brain responded. _Oh, shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up!_

If anything, they were going faster now. She was sure she was going to loose her grip. Her arms shook from nerves and exhaustion at being tense for so long. She was close to telling them to stop many times, but the thought of having them use a Levicorpus on her in order to carry her back was humiliating enough to stop her tongue.

"Hermione. Hermione! We've stopped," Luna called.

Hermione peeked an eye open and glanced down at the, indeed still, ground.

"Oh," Hermione replied. All of her muscles felt weak at that point. She considered how to get off without falling on her face. Stabbing one toe into the ground, she swung around the other leg and fell heavily against the broom.

"Hermione?" Rolf asked.

"I'm never getting on a broom again," Hermione addressed the ground as she wait for her muscles to stop jumping and actually take her weight.

The other two laughed as if she made a joke.

Eventually, they all made it to the apparation point and made a side-along apparition to Rolf's house. He actually had a yard and so had an unwarded spot that the Muggles couldn't see. Hermione flooed home first and let Luna say her goodbyes alone.

Once home, her body wouldn't let her do anything but lie in bed, but her mind supplied horrible memories one after another. It took Hermione a long time to fall asleep that night. And an unhealthy amount of potions.

A loud noise woke Hermione from her sleep later that night. She was immediately crouched in her bed with her wand held defensively. Seeing nothing, she relaxed a little and was trying to figure if it had only been in her head when the sound came again. Hermione started, then realized what it was. The telephone. Hermione frowned at her clock and then padded out to the phone on the wall.

"Hello?" she croaked.

"Hermione? Is that you?"

"Harry?"

"Yes, unless you have other male callers you haven't mentioned?"

"_Harry!_"

"Listen, can you talk?"

"_Harry James Potter!_ What in Merlin's pants are you doing calling me at five o'clock _in the morning_ on a Sunday!?"

* * *

Poor Hermione. :(


	22. The Aftermath

"Oh, I forgot about the time difference."

"Forgot? Harry, how does something like an _entire ocean_ slip your mind?"

"Ginny left for a brunch with some of her girl friends so I wanted to take advantage."

"Why can't you talk about this with Ginny? Is something wrong?"

"No, no. Well, to a degree. Hermione…"

"Stop dragging it out and just _say it_!"

"Iwanttomarryginnybuti'mnotsureifshe'llsayyes."

"Okay, slower, Harry. Only half my brain cells are working."

"I want to ask Ginny to marry me."

"Congratulations. Why are you telling me before her?"

"Because of what happened with you and Ron."

"What about Ron and me?"

"Well, I know you basically turned him down."

"I did it before he popped the question! He's smart enough to catch on to very blatant comments that showed I wasn't interested."

"Blatant?" Harry's voice went up a pitch. "Hermione, you _know_ I don't get girls enough…"

"Don't worry, Harry," Hermione comforted. "It will be easy when you are looking for it. Have you talked about anything related to getting married? Can you remember her response?"

"Uh... she didn't seem very interested when Mrs. Weasley was talking about baby clothes..."

"Having children right now and marrying you are two different subjects."

"Well... I mentioned my parent's house in Godric's Hollow as our future home?"

"And her response?"

"Erm... she said it needed some cleaning up but it had a nice structure or something?"

"That's positive."

"It is? But she said it was dirty."

"Harry, she didn't shoot the idea down, so it's positive. Drop a couple more hints about your future together. Observe her responses. Does it sound like she is willing to work with you or if she is trying to shoot it down. Call me next week- at a reasonable time- and I'll try to help you decipher it."

"You are brilliant, Hermione. How did you ever figure this stuff out?"

"Having two roommates who perfected this 'art' of communication helped me learn how to translate," Hermione said dryly. "Goodnight, Harry."

"Hermione-"

"Is it another emergency? It's still five o'clock in the bloody morning and I've had under four hours of sleep!"

"Really? But didn't you always go to bed-"

"_Good night_, Harry!" Hermione repeated, her irritation mounting.

"Er, sorry." Harry said quickly. "Good night, Hermione!"

Hermione hung up the phone when a loud 'clack' then stumbled back down the hall and into bed.

Between classes their study group had a way of naturally gravitating towards each other. So, after their first class, Daryn and John were at her desk talking before she had even finished packing things up.

"So, how was mushroom collecting?" John asked with a smile as he leaned on her desk.

Hermione looked up with a frown. "Mushrooms?"

"No, John," Daryn laughed. "It was Mooncalf crap."

"Tell me he's joking," John said, pulling a face.

"I'll have you know that they are very useful for facilitating the growth of magical plants," Hermione replied primly.

"Yeah, and perfect for a romantic night out or celebrating a birthday," John cracked.

"What is?" Malfoy asked as he and Shandra walked in on the conversation.

"Mooncalf feces," supplied Daryn with a straight face but started cracking up soon after.

"You boys are so immature!" Hermione said with a small pout.

"Should I ask?" Malfoy drawled with a quirked eyebrow.

"Luna just needed them to help grow her dittany, but these two decided to forego any intelligent conversation about it." Hermione glowered at the boys for daring to mock scholastic material.

"I just asked about mushrooms!" John said, holding his hands up to plead innocence.

Daryn laughed and Malfoy just glanced at Shandra with eyebrows raised.

"Okay, I'm not going to ask," Malfoy said dryly.

"Anyways," Shandra said, ignoring Daryn and John's antics. "We were just discussing Professor Nightingale's class. Do you really think that Purebloods are that oblivious? Who can live in our society without having a basic understanding of electricity or phones? And hasn't everyone visited a muggle doctor at least once? It can't be a completely foreign concept?"

Malfoy's mouth thinned and he repeatedly shifted from one foot to the other.

"In England people can just use the magical version of all those Muggle things you've said," Hermione explained. "Why use a phone when you can just make a floo call? Who needs electricity when you can do it with magic instead?"

"But what about if you want to contact a Muggle?" Shandra asked.

Hermione shrugged. "Most of them are so set in their ways that they find the Muggle world foreign and intimidating. Some of them don't even know any Muggles."

Hermione watched Malfoy bristle slightly. "Intimidating?" he asked, his teeth slightly clenched.

"The unknown is almost always intimidating. It's easier to feel superior and above it than try to struggle through learning a new culture."

After squinting at her for a moment, Malfoy raised his eyebrows and gave a small nod.

"Well, they should figure it out. The world is going to leave them behind, you know," Shandra added.

"Some of them do. Harry told me about this one time Ron sent him a letter…" Hermione started with a smile of recollection before the sadness kicked in. "Ron's a pureblood," she explained more somberly. "Anyways, he also used a phone. If they make an attempt, it might be a bit foolish at first, but we should recognize the courage it took to attempt it at all."

Hermione noticed Malfoy nodding along, deep in his own thoughts. She hadn't been thinking of him when she said that last part, but, seeing him now, she had to consider it. Why had he ended up here, where there was so much Muggle influence? How did he seem so at home at a Muggle place like the miniature-golf course?

"I guess," Shandra said. "I can see what you mean about courage. I've seen muggle-borns jump into our world and how hard it is at first. Who's Ron by the way?"

Hermione seriously considered telling Shandra it was none of her business. However, Hermione reasoned, she had brought it up herself. "My Ex," she said instead.

"Oh! You dated a pureblood?"

"Yes. A lot of my friends in England were pureblood, actually."

"Isn't it weird, talking to someone who is so ignorant about half your life?"

"I went to the same school as them, there was a lot we would talk about. Have you guys finished the project for the next class?"

Malfoy, surprisingly, responded. "Are you talking about our A&P project or the magical diseases paper?"

"Anatomy and Physiology," Hermione answered. "What did you think of the theory of how magic interacts with the human body?"

Malfoy shrugged. "The professor who wrote it is highly respected in the wizarding community."

"That is close to meaningless," Hermione scoffed.

"He did back it up with a lot of anecdotal evidence," Malfoy said tersely, his sneer sneaking into his facial expression.

"But, who really cares?" John jumped in. "As long as the magic works, right?"

Hermione exchanged a deriding glance with Malfoy before she realized who she was exchanging the glance with. "I'll have you know," she said quickly to cover up the moment. "Magical theory is what is used to create new spells."

"But we're not making new spells," John returned when a shrug.

"We are _using_ them, though," Malfoy answered and Hermione found herself nodding in agreement.

"Anyways, Daryn," -Shandra grasped his bicep- "tell everyone about the amazing news!"

Daryn tilted his head.

"The Halloween event!" Shandra slapped his arm.

"Oh." Daryn patted her hand. "So, Halloween is a rather big event in Wizarding NYC."

Everyone nodded their heads in acknowledgement.

"My band not only is going to be playing in the event but we've been commissioned to write a song for the event."

The little group burst into noise.

"Haha, I told you you'd be famous! That's the bomb!"

"Yeah, it's so phat."

"Congratulations!"

"Brilliant, man."

"Write a song?" Hermione asked. "In less than two months?"

Daryn grimaced. "Jeremy, one of the guys, says he has something he's been tinkering with. I just hope we can polish it off pronto and start practicing. These next few weeks are going to be hellish."

"Yeah, man. Especially since all the teachers are giving us projects for midterms already!" John agreed.

"You'd think, since we are all taking the same classes, that they'd actually sync the assignments better," Shandra huffed, flicking a piece of her hair behind her back.

Everyone dissipated as the next class was about to start, but Hermione was surprised to find Malfoy sitting next to her.

"Malfoy," Hermione acknowledged, toying with her wand.

He stared ahead without glancing towards her. "How are they? Everyone in London."

Hermione frowned and examined his face to understand his intent. "Why would you care, Malfoy?"

His face broke a little and he turned towards her, mouth open to say something. Then his face shut down and he closed his mouth. "Nevermind. You're right; why would I care?" he asked bitterly. Grabbing his messenger bag, he brushed past her to sit somewhere else in the lecture hall.

Hermione watched him go and wondered what contact he had with their classmates from Hogwarts. There had been rumors about him in England. That he had killed himself, he was banished from wizarding society, and the like. Hermione hadn't really paid attention to them. She had had more pressing things to think about than Draco Malfoy. Maybe he really had been banished? It would explain some things… Maybe he couldn't talk to his surviving friends. But she didn't know about his friends anyway. She couldn't have helped him regardless of how she had responded. Hermione shook her head and tried to be interested in the variations of dragon pox.

The next Thursday Hermione had another appointment with the psychologist Dr. Burnell.

"So, how have things gone since our last visit?" he asked.

Hermione sighed and gripped her hands together hard. "Not very well," she admitted.

Dr. Burnell nodded for her to continue.

"Things weren't too bad. I even went to a party and that went pretty well. But right after that I had a… an attack, I guess you would say. It completely messed up my sleeping schedule and study schedule. It felt like I was trying to hold everything together while momentum wanted to drag it all away from me. I even got an acceptable on one of my assignments. Can you believe that? An acceptable." Hermione glumly shook her head.

"What are your usual grades?" Dr. Burnell asked.

"Outstanding."

"All of them?"

"All of them. Well, sometimes I will get an Exceeds expectations but that is rare and rather disappointing."

"Do you feel bad about yourself when you don't get an outstanding?"

Hermione cocked her head to the side. "I guess I did back in school. Too many things have happened for grades to have the same importance for me now."

"Then, does it affect your mood?"

"Bad grades? Of course. I've put a lot of work in knowing the material. Of course I would be upset."

Dr. Burnell nodded and scribbled on his notebook.

Hermione twitched, wondering what he was writing down.

"And the… attack, as you put it? It is more common to refer to it as an episode. What triggered the episode?"

"My friend took me out into the middle of the woods."

"I see." He furrowed his eyebrows and waited.

Hermione realized he probably didn't see. "It was too quiet. It reminded me of other things when I had been in a similar situation."

"Similar situation?"

Hermione shrugged. "War stuff."

"Ah." Dr. Burnell adjusted his glasses and continued writing. "And how did this affect your schooling?"

"The memories kept me up and then I was tired and got behind on my schoolwork. Being tired just seemed to make me more susceptible to a mini 'episode' as you called it."

He nodded and continued to write.

"So the reason for your bad grade is not being able to study well enough due to your episodes."

Hermione shrugged. "Mostly."

"What other things could you do to improve your grade?"

Hermione let out a long sigh and folded her arms. "I probably need a study partner," she muttered sullenly.

"What?"

"I need someone to study with," Hermione pronounced clearly. "There are things I can't practice very well on my own."

"What are your options to do that?"

"Well, my study group already are occupied… except maybe Malfoy."

"Malfoy?"

"The bloke I hate."

"And why do you hate Malfoy?"

Hermione stiffened. "I'm not talking about it." She rubbed her left arm and concentrated on slowly breathing with her diaphragm.

Dr. Burnell took in her body language. "Okay, we don't have to. What are your other options?"

"I could find someone outside of my study group. It's just that… I've heard them talk. I don't really have much faith in most of these students' intelligence. I don't have time to try to tutor the person that I'm supposed to be studying with."

The rest of the session continued in a similar vein. Once Hermione left his office, she wasn't sure if it had actually been helpful or not. While she was the neighborhood, she went to Salem's Shop to pick up more ingredients and potions to try to help her get more sleep. After picking up a few ingredients, she stood in the light filtering through the windows. She read the ingredients on the back of one sleeping potion to try and see if the addition of valerian root would have a negative affect.

She heard someone clearing their throat and looked up. "Malfoy, what are you doing here?"

Malfoy folded his arms and quirked an eyebrow. "_I_ was the one who introduced _you_ to this shop. An intelligent person would realize that my knowledge of the shop would be due to patronizing the store myself."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I'm cut to the quick. Malfoy doesn't believe I'm intelligent." She wriggled her hands in mock horror.

Her hands drew Malfoy's attention to the bottles and he grabbed one out of her hand.

"Hey!" she yelped.

Malfoy held the bottle out of her reach and frowned as he read it. "Didn't you buy some of this stuff recently?"

"Keeping track of my buying patterns, Malfoy?"

Malfoy continued to hold it out of her reach and cocked his eyebrow again.

Hermione sighed. "I know you have some sort of investment in this because of personal reasons but I'm not going to kill myself, okay Malfoy?"

His face darkened. "I still say you are being daft."

Hermione put her hands on her hips. "I barely get any sleep sometimes, Malfoy. What would you know about the desperation that brings? I'm exhausted _all_ the time. And I feel like ripping someone's throat out or crying or _both_!"

Malfoy twitched and his mouth thinned out into a tight line. Instead of saying anything, he slowly lowered the bottle and, once it was within her reach, she snatched it away from him.

"I'm trying to give to help you avoid what I've seen, Granger. There is no need to be so hostile," he said in a low voice, his eyes avoiding her.

Hermione considered this, noting the pain in his eyes. "I guess I can't fault you for that," she said a little more gently. "Don't grab things out of my hand, though. We're not first years in Hogwarts anymore."

Malfoy looked up and gave her a sad smile. "No, we definitely aren't."

He left to buy his ingredients and Hermione finished her analysis of the ingredients.

* * *

So I've been doing a lot of research/work on my own mental health stuff but it also makes me rather self-involved and so I just barely remembered to post. But hope you enjoy!

(And please don't take that as I actually know what I'm writing about. I tried to make sure it was authentic as far as I could but this was mainly written to try to sort out my own mess. And my life is still a mess.)


	23. Purebloods and Muggles

On Friday Hermione decided it was time for her to try the volunteer work that Daryn had found for her. She flooed to the location and went to check with the front desk lady to see if all her paperwork had checked out. The receptionist was actually a youngish girl with heavy blond highlights, black nails, and a tie over her camisole. She affirmed that the paperwork had gone through and directed her to the next room.

"Just ask the guy in the purple shirt what to do. He's running things today."

Hermione nodded and followed her instructions. She located him quickly enough as everyone else in the room was several feet shorter than him.

"Malfoy. I guess I shouldn't be surprised. So, you are in charge of everything today?"

Malfoy looked up from the desk he was leaning over. "Granger. Give me a minute."

Hermione nodded. Malfoy turned back to the desk and continued muttering to the child who was sitting at it. Malfoy pointed to a few things and then said, "Now show me."

The little boy scribbled madly and then presented it to Malfoy.

Malfoy leaned down, inspecting it, and then patted the boy on the head. "You've figured it out. Do the rest the same way." Malfoy then turned and walked over to Hermione.

"I've decided to come back," Hermione informed him, folding her arms in front of her chest.

"Want a pat on the head?" Malfoy asked.

"_No_," Hermione answered through clenched teeth. "Just tell me where you need help."

Malfoy shrugged and looked around the room. "Mainly it's just supervision until something bad happens."

Hermione rubbed her forehead. "_Great_, worse than Prefect duty."

"You could see if anyone needs help with homework. You actually have taken these muggle courses."

"Oh, good." Hermione clapped her hands together, relieved to not being doing nothing.

As she moved towards the table, Malfoy grabbed her shoulder.

"Granger, just remember they aren't in middle school yet. Use small words, okay?" Malfoy gestured with his other hand to denote a small amount.

"Middle school?" Hermione asked.

"It's a school in between primary and secondary school in the United States. It includes children from 11 to 14 years old."

"Oh. How do you even know that, Malfoy?"

"I work with them every week." Malfoy rolled his eyes. "It's enough to pick up the lingo."

Hermione nodded and went past him to the table. The children were working on simple math problems, filling out worksheets, or coloring.

"Hi, guys. My name is Hermione. Unlike Malfoy I actually have taken these Muggle classes. Ask me if I have any questions, okay?"

"Just because Draco is a pureblood doesn't mean that he doesn't understand this stuff."

Hermione looked up to see the black-haired boy from her birthday party. "Ari?"

"Yeah, my name is Auriga."

"Like the constellation?"

"Family tradition," the boy muttered.

"Like the Blacks?"

Ari looked up sharply. "How do you know that?"

"I'm… I've known a couple Blacks."

Ari shrugged. "Yeah, like the Blacks. Draco isn't stupid, though."

Hermione nodded. "I know. He wouldn't be in the program he is if he was stupid."

Ari frowned. "But you treat him…"

Hermione smiled. "Ah. Well, I think he is stupid in a lot of other ways, but I know he is smart bookwise."

"Thanks, Granger," Malfoy said dryly from behind her.

Hermione jumped. "Oh, Malfoy. We were discussing the merits of your intelligence."

"I heard."

Hermione shrugged, her back still to him. "It's not like you can argue with it.".

"That, Granger, is called a frozen assessment."

"A what?" Hermione looked over her shoulder to frown at Malfoy.

"Ask your shrink, it's their lingo."

Hermione squinted her eyes. "Okay…"

He was returning the frown when something caught his attention out of the corner of his eye. "Oi! Stop that! No magicking the furniture!" Malfoy ran off and Hermione leaned back in her chair to try to get a glimpse of the disaster to see if she needed to help.

"It's just Jessica. She likes turning things pink," Ari said.

Hermione looked back at him. "There are worse hobbies, I suppose." Then, considering what he had already said, she asked, "Did Malfoy tell you he was a pureblood?"

Ari shook his head. "I already knew."

"You already knew? How? No one else seems to have a clue."

Ari rolled his eyes. "You must not be as smart as your reputation."

"Are you related?" Hermione scowled, thinking it might be possible as both of them seemed to be able to get under her skin.

Ari shrugged again.

"Are you a pureblood too, then?"

Ari frowned and gave a slight inclination of his head.

"Don't worry," Hermione reassured. "I don't hate purebloods."

Ari breathed through his teeth. "Cch, only the uneducated and uncultured do that anyway."

"You've definitely been talking to Malfoy." Hermione smiled and then switched topics. "Don't you have any homework to do?"

"Nah, Muggle sciences are pretty easy."

"Oh, what are you studying?"

"Life Sciences. Animals and stuff." Ari rested his face on a hand and then looked at her sideways. "Draco's already asked me about it today so I don't want to tell you everything I'm learning too."

"I could tell you what I'm learning?"

Ari rolled his eyes.

"I could show you some magic?"

Ari rolled his eyes again. "Do you think I haven't seen pretty much every spell in existence, living with a pureblood family?"

Hermione couldn't help smirking. "I highly doubt that. Let's play a game to see if you can recognize all the spells."

"Whatever."

"What about… 'Avis'?"

"It conjures birds." Ari sighed. "Easy."

"'Densaugeo?'"

"I have older brother you know. Had to get my teeth shrunk and they got grounded."

"Hm… 'Orchideous?'"

"Again, older brothers. Flowers for dates."

"'Ferula.'"

"Emergency bandage thing."

"Alright, smart guy, 'Qualitas Anima?'"

"A medical spell, I think."

"'Signum Vitalis?'"

"Medical too…" Ari cocked his head and squinted at her.

"Episkey?"

Ari threw his hands into the air. "Now you're just using a bunch of medical spells."

Hermione shrugged. "I've got to win somehow. What if I showed you how some of them worked?"

Ari quirked an eyebrow, looking a lot like Malfoy in that moment.

"Fine, I admit I'm bored and just want to practice." Hermione rolled her eyes. "What if I bribed you?"

"With what?"

Hermione bit her lip. "Well… what would you want from me?"

The boy tilted his head to the side and observed her. He scratched his nose and then said, "First, I want you to explain everything you are doing, and… I want you to take me to another place like we went for your birthday."

"Okay-"

"-But you have to make it your idea. Like, you're the one who wants it and we have to get ice cream."

"Okay-"

"-And you have to help me whenever I have problems with Muggle stuff."

"Ari, that is a lot for me just practicing a couple spells."

"I'll let you practice whenever you come here. As long as I don't have something pressing. And no more than half an hour! Malfoy told me how obsessed you can get with homework…"

"Oh, did he? What exactly did he say?"

Ari shrugged. "I don't remember." He cocked his head again. "Why?"

Hermione let out her breath. "Doesn't matter. I agree to your terms." She held out her hand and Ari grasped it with his smaller hand.

"Good," he said. He looked relieved.

"Erm… can I show you the spells, then?"

Ari waved his hand as if he was bored. "Yeah, sure."

And that was how Hermione started performing spells on Ari.

After a couple minutes, Hermione started explaining the more difficult and recent spells she had learned.

"The next one is called 'Quantum Infectio.' It's to help measure the amount of bacteria and other foreign materials are in a wound or in a person in general. The movement of the wand really helps specify where you are taking the count from. Understand?"

Ari shook his head and frowned at her with his bushy little black eyebrows.

Hermione shrugged. "I'll just show you. Maybe it will make more sense." She raised her wand and was startled by Malfoy's voice.

"Put the wand down, Granger."

Hermione spun to point her wand at Malfoy. "Like hell."

Malfoy had his wand out and he scowled at her. "Ari, you hurt?"

Hermione heard Ari sigh dramatically from behind her. "Draco, she was just showing me some spells from her class."

Malfoy's wand tip lowered slightly.

"She was about to show me "'Quanto Infection.'"

"No, it's called Quantum Infectio.' There isn't an 'n' at the end and the emphasis is on the middle of the word-" Hermione turned back to Ari as she explained.

"-Granger, you numpty."

Hermione spun quickly back around. "What did you say?"

"You are an idiot. Not only did you turn your back on me with my wand out but you are going to ruin your reputation around here doing unwarranted magic on minors."

Hermione's lips thinned and she folded her arms again.

With a sigh, Malfoy slipped his wand away. He looked past her to Ari. "Why did you even let her do that?"

Hermione glanced to see Ari's pout as he said, "She said she would help me with Muggle stuff. You know, if I need it."

Malfoy frowned. "I can help you with that-"

"She's a mud- Muggleborn, though."

Malfoy's eyes widened at the half-swallowed insult and quickly glanced from her face to her left arm. Instinctively, Hermione rolled her hand away from his view.

"You don't ever-" Malfoy started with a scathing tone but Hermione put a hand up to stop the tirade of words.

"Ari, where did you hear such an ugly word?" Hermione asked softly.

Ari now was very red and was staring at the floor angrily. Ari managed a glance at her face before staring down at the floor.

"Where did you hear it?" she repeated.

"My brothers," Ari muttered. "I'm- It just slipped out. I didn't mean it."

"Give a proper apology, Ari," Malfoy growled over her shoulder.

Hermione tried to push him back with her elbow so he wouldn't be so intimidating, but he just pushed back.

Ari, tears starting to form in his eyes, bit his lip and stared at her stomach as he grit out, "I'm sorry, Ms. Granger."

Hermione bent down to try to see Ari's eyes. "It is an ugly word. I'm sure you understand that it is very hurtful and you should never call anyone that name, even if it is not in their hearing."

Ari shifted his face so she couldn't see it and muttered gruffly, "Yeah."

"Can you promise me that you won't?"

"Yeah," he muttered insolently again.

"Good," she said even quieter so that Malfoy would not hear. "Then I will keep my side of our bargain even though I can't practice on you."

At that, Ari looked at her with a confused frown on his face.

"I forgive you, Ari," she said. "I still like you."

He only frowned more.

She stood up to see the fury on Malfoy's face still directed at the little boy.

Grabbing Malfoy's shirt, she tugged. "Come talk with me on the roof for a bit," she told him firmly.

He looked down at her and then her hand.

Extracting himself from her, he growled. "Fine." He tried to get in some more glaring at Ari, but Hermione just prodded him towards the door.

As they walked past the black nail polish girl, Malfoy told her gruffly, "We need to… discuss something. We'll be back in a couple minutes tops. Please look out for any explosions or general mayhem."

The girl glanced skeptically between Hermione and Malfoy but nodded and shooed them along.

They both took the stairs to the roof they had already met on before.

Once the door was closed, Malfoy folded his arms. "Well?"

"You were being way too aggressive back there," Hermione told him.

His scowl deepened. "Did you hear what he almost said?"

"Yes, almost said."

"Why aren't you more upset?" He gestured towards her arm, and Hermione hid it against her stomach, defensively.

"You used to say it all the time when we were, younger. Why do you think that the half-swallowed parroted insult of a little boy would hurt me?"

Malfoy flinched. "That's my point. He needs to learn it's wrong."

"By yelling at him?" Hermione asked sarcastically. "That's not how you get people to act like you want them to."

Malfoy clenched his teeth and looked up to meet her eyes with a pained expression. As their eyes met, she had a sort of epiphany. "This isn't actually about Ari, is it?"

"What?" He frowned more.

"You identify with him. You are angry at him because you are angry at yourself."

Malfoy looked startled. He took a step back. "What?!"

"You are sorry; you are just too prideful to admit it!" She jabbed her finger in the air towards him.

Malfoy drew up and folded his arms defensively. "What are you talking about?"

"Are you sorry?"

Malfoy blinked as he followed her train of thought. She saw his teeth clench as he quickly turned to stare at the ground. Finally, he sighed and, after glancing in several directions other than her face, he looked right into her eyes. "Of course I am," he said in a soft, rough voice.

Hermione felt her heart clench oddly at the admission. Despite the fact that it made her start to forgive him, she knew he had to face his own regrets directly if he wasn't going to continue to take it out on Ari. "Then say it, properly, Malfoy," she kept her voice steely.

"Say what?"

"A proper apology. Just like you told Ari to."

In that moment, Malfoy looked a lot like Ari had. He bunched his fist at his sides. His mouth worked, but nothing came out. He looked like he wanted to strangle her.

Hermione held her ground. "You can't take this out on Ari. Be a man and face it yourself."

"I've already told you that."

"Properly," Hermione repeated.

Malfoy all but growled at her. He stalked towards her, his hands back into fists. Hermione watched him uncertainly, hand ready to grab her wand.

He grabbed her shoulders and she made a surprised sound. She was about to shove him off of her when he spoke.

"I'm sorry," he snarled.

Looking up into his grey eyes, Hermione waited.

"I'm sorry for being a prat when we were younger, for hurting you and making fun of you. I'm sorry for those things I did as a Death Eater. I'm sorry you were hurt. Really hurt..." His fingers dug even harder into her shoulders and his voice was becoming more and more strained.

Hermione watched his face as his eyes closed tightly and he flinched away from her, as if trying to fight off pain. He started to release her shoulder, but Hermione grabbed one of his hands. She patted that hand, looking for words. Could he really be sorry? Was he just lying? But why would he lie? She could forgive Ari, was it that much of a reach to apply that to Malfoy, at least in his earlier years? Hermione looked into his face, searching for clues. Was she going to be like Harry, always blaming someone because she hated them? What would happen if she gave Malfoy a clean slate? Until she actually knew, she would just treat him like Ari, she decided. "I accept your apology," she told him, and added. "I'm working on forgiving you."

He stared at their hands for a bit and looked back at her face. "Forgiving?" he asked, like he wasn't sure what she meant.

"You know, absolving you from paying your debt to me."

At first his hand tightened onto hers, but then he dropped her hand and stalked away from her. He paced facing away from her.

Having enough of the awkward conversation, Hermione asked, "I want to take Ari out for some ice cream. Who should I talk to about this?"

He paused and then turned towards her. "Me." He jabbed his chest.

"What?"

"Me. While he is on this continent, he is partially my responsibility. If you take him anywhere, I'm going as well."

"What?"

"I said-"

"No, why are you responsible for him? Where are his parents? What-"

"None of your business, inquisitorial squad Granger. If he wants to talk about it he will."

"If you remember, I wasn't the one on-"

"-why were you using that spell on him anyway?" Draco cut her off.

Hermione paused as she tried to follow the leap in the conversation. "On Ari?"

"Yeah, why-"

Hermione shrugged. "Just… testing it out."

Malfoy raised an eyebrow. "On a ten year old boy?"

Hermione bit her lip. "It was that or pigeons."

"Pigeons?" Malfoy look completely baffled.

"Nevermind. Can Ari come out tomorrow for ice cream?"

Malfoy scratched the back of his head and narrowed his eyes at her. "Let's go talk to Ari and see if he wants to." He walked past her and started down the steps. Hermione hurried to follow him, rubbing her shoulder.

* * *

A/N: It seems like everyone who reviewed was siding with Malfoy last chapter (and okay okay I can see why) Welcome new readers and thank you for reviewing!

I am posting a Dramione Valentine's Day two shot this week and next week for anyone who likes fluff.

Glad you guys are still around :3


	24. In which there are buses and ice cream

Ari, of course, didn't object and it was agreed that they would meet up the next day for ice cream. Not really familiar with the area, Hermione told them to meet her at the shop she and Luna had already gone to once. Hermione arrived first and ordered her dessert by the time that the other two showed up.

Ari studied the myriad of flavors through the glass and then leaned over to whisper up into Hermione's ear. "Is this a Muggle shop?"

Looking down at the ice cream, Hermione supposed that it was a bit mundane compared to what he was used to; no Whizzing Fizbees or cinnamon candies that induced fire breathing. Deciding to help him find it exciting, she said, "Yes, it is. Luna says" –she pointed to a few different flavors- "these taste good together."

Malfoy, who had been systematically taste testing the ice cream on tiny spoons, spoke up. "It's probably disgusting, Ari. She's the one who wore the pirate costume and I'd trust her culinary tastes as much as her fashion ones."

"But that was cool," Ari said, still staring down at the flavors.

Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Which ones did she point out?"

Ari pointed.

"Pineapple, pistachio, and peppermint?" Malfoy asked. "I stand by my first statement."

Ari looked a bit disappointed.

"How about you test it first?" Hermione suggested. She gave Malfoy a look to dare and contradict her as she asked the boy behind the counter to give Ari a small bit of each of the flavors. Malfoy just crossed his arms and watched.

Ari shoved all of them into his mouth at once then gagged and nearly spit it out.

"Just swallow it!" Malfoy admonished.

With a pained face and only a little theatrics, Ari did.

"Here," the boy behind the counter said. "How about you try this instead?" He held a florescent blue bit of ice cream out to Ari on another spoon.

Ari treated it with some trepidation but tried it anyway. His face cleared once he put it in his mouth. "I like that one!" Ari said.

With the young man's help, they were able to find a few flavors that actually agreed with Ari. As they paid for Ari's ice cream, Malfoy was still debating between two flavors.

Ari took the chance to whisper to her. "I wanted to do more than ice cream."

"I know," Hermione replied. "I just think that doing too much at once might make Malfoy suspicious."

Ari watched Malfoy finally pick one flavor. "I guess."

Hermione and Ari chose a high table next to one of the windows. As they were settling down, Malfoy joined them with a cream colored ice cream with a cookie wafer pressed vertically into the top.

Hermione couldn't help jabbing at him. "After all that deliberation, and you got something this mundane?

Malfoy raised an eyebrow, removed the cookie and bit into it. "I don't see any point in polluting the flavor with pointless garnishes. Isn't that right, Ari?"

Malfoy looked towards Ari, who had a gummy worm halfway into his mouth. "Erum…" he managed around the mouthful. Hermione looked down at Ari's ice cream, which was barely visible under chocolate candy and gummy worms, and snorted.

"Heathens," Malfoy muttered.

Hermione's snort turned into a half laugh.

Malfoy looked up, his eyebrows rising up, before he gave her a wry smile.

"What, not going to lecture me on the virtues of keeping ice cream pure?" she said to continue the joke. Hermione realized the implications of her question once Malfoy's half smile froze.

"Oh, I know when I'm wrong now," Malfoy said dryly, not meeting her eyes.

Hermione was surprised by the pang of guilt and hurt that ran through her when Malfoy turned his face away from her. She wrestled with the feeling for a moment before she chose just to shake it off. "Erm… so how did you end up at the place where we volunteer, Ari? Did you know Malfoy before he started there?"

Ari made a face that showed off his multicolored tongue. "Once Draco told Father about it, Father insisted that I attend instead of spending my time with all those Muggles at my basketball practice."

"Why not start a game at the wizarding place?" she asked.

"Have you seen the kids there? It would be boring as he-"

"Ari!" Malfoy cut him off. "We should try that."

"Do you even know what basketball is?"

"Yes, it's the one with the sideways hoops," Malfoy said smugly.

Ari rolled his eyes. "Why do you compare everything to Quidditch?"

"I didn't." Malfoy sat back, spinning his spoon between his fingers.

"They aren't sideways hoops, they're just hoops!" Ari gestured emphatically.

"It sounds like a wonderful idea!" Hermione interrupted.

The two boys stopped and stared at her.

"Starting a basketball team," she clarified. "It seems like too many of the boys there are bored witless anyways. It would be a good outlet for their energy."

"Exactly. See, Ari?" Malfoy said.

Ari stabbed a gummy worm viciously. "You are just agreeing with her so you don't look so bad."

Malfoy ran his hand through his hair and gave her a look of exasperation.

Hermione shrugged as she tried not to laugh. "It won't hurt to try," she told Ari.

"That's what you think," Ari muttered darkly. "Wizards hate Muggle things."

Hermione's breath caught. She looked accusingly towards Malfoy, but he was grimacing. He turned to her with his eyes begging something from her and she was hit by the realization that Malfoy thought she could fix this, whatever it was. She gave him an incredulous look. Of course, being Hermione Granger, she had to at least try.

Hermione began hesitantly, "Not all Wizards hate Muggle things, only the ignorant ones… Have you heard of Ron Weasley? His family fought in the Wizarding War. His father loved Muggle things. He was always trying to figure out how electrical things worked. Many of the devices that Wizards use are modified Muggle inventions. In fact, most of the Wizards I've meant here seem to embrace Muggle culture…" she trailed off and looked to Malfoy for help.

"Ari is from one of the old families," Malfoy said. Ari ignored them and played with the M&M's at the bottom of his cup. "They came over during the First Wizarding War but still keep to themselves."

Hermione raised an eyebrow at Malfoy. How did he expect her to cure the prejudice and lies that had been ingrained into his culture? Hermione stared out the window at the traffic and found some small inspiration. "Have you ever heard of the Knight Bus, Ari?"

Ari paused in his dissection of a gummy worm. "I've ridden it."

"Did you know it's based on Muggle transportation?"

Ari looked to Malfoy who nodded. Ari looked back to Hermione expectantly.

"The Knight Bus is based off of the bus system that Muggles use. Muggle buses only go on certain routes and you have to plan which routes to take-"

"You don't just tell them where to go?" Ari asked, confused.

"Here." Malfoy laid a napkin out on the table and pulled out a pen. "If you are here and want to go here, a bus might only go from here to here and another bus go from here to here." As he talked he was sketching out lines on the paper napkin. "The buses don't go anywhere other than those paths. If you wanted to go from this place to this place you would have to take the first bus, switch buses, and then take the second bus. Make sense?"

Ari shook his head slowly, squinting at the piece of paper.

"Just taking a bus would make this a lot easier to understand," Malfoy said in exasperation, running his hand through his hair.

"Okay!" Ari said excitedly.

Malfoy raised an eyebrow and then tilted his head to check with her.

Hermione nodded in agreement. "Sure, let's do it."

"Alright!" Ari cheered and dumped the rest of the candies into his mouth in his rush to leave. They all shrugged on their jumpers and exited the ice cream shop.

"So, Ari, where do you want to go?" Hermione asked as they walked towards the nearest bus station she knew of.

"Arkatcish!" Ari said around his mouth-full of candy.

Hermione looked to Malfoy who only shrugged.

"To what?"

"Arcash gahmes!" Ari articulated, giving Hermione a view of all the chocolate and colored candy pieces.

"I think he means arcade games," Hermione told Malfoy. Ari nodded emphatically.

"That was unintelligible." Malfoy said and then gave her a sidelong look. "I suppose dating Weasley gave you practice interpreting words half-garbled with food."

"Mmmh," Hermione tried to sound disapproving because he was making fun of her friend even if she had expressed that same distaste herself. Really, she just didn't want to think about it at all.

"Things didn't go well for you two after the war?" he asked, apparently picking up on her underlying bitterness anyways.

Hermione nodded reluctantly, thinking how nothing went well after the war. She waited for him to make fun of her or, at the very least, of Ron. Instead, he was silent.

She looked up to see he was still staring at her, his lips pulled into a thoughtful frown.

"Is that why you are here?" Malfoy asked. "Did you leave because of that prat?"

"Like I'd be so melodramatic over a boy," Hermione said scornfully. Trying not to get caught up in all the memories associated with Ron and their past, she watched as Ari strode in front of them and absorbed all the activity of the city. "Is that why you are here?" she asked. "Because of things that happened with your friends?"

Malfoy shrugged. "It's a very long and twisted path that got me here," he said in a distant voice. "The toll the war took from everyone was steep. It got to me."

"What was it that made you come here, to New York?"

To her surprise, he replied. "I ended up here kind of by accident. I stayed because it was a chance to start over."

Hermione leaned forward, feeling an inexplicable pull towards him, to hear more. No one would talk about the war, not without trying to sugarcoat it. It was like a ripped page from a book. Nothing in her life seemed to make sense with that open gap of the ignored consequences of the war. Hermione never realized how hungry she was to try to talk about it with someone who shared her experiences somehow. "Did it help, moving here?"

"Eventually. At first I was just left with this hole of things I didn't want or didn't have." Malfoy shrugged, as if what he had just said didn't matter. "And you? Why are you here?"

Hermione looked up to meet Malfoy's eyes. So empty of the derision she feared and expected. "Many of the same reasons, actually. My past haunted me there. Every breath I took was stale and too familiar. It had boxed me in somehow."

"Has being here changed anything?"

Hermione considered the echoed question, slowing down as they came upon the bus stop. "I don't know," she said at last. She hugged herself to protect against her answer, carefully studying the graffiti-ed bench under the bus stop's shelter so Malfoy couldn't see the frustration that threatened to overwhelm her. "I really don't know."

Malfoy took a step towards her, his hand slightly outreached. Hermione flinched in surprise; she had grown unused to people touching her. Her flinch stopped Malfoy's hand, and it hung awkwardly between them.

"Where do we go to play arcade games?" Ari asked as he turned around, breaking the moment.

Malfoy quickly pulled his hand to his side.

Hermione stared at his hand as she tried to collect herself. He had tried to touch her. Hadn't he? But why? It seemed like a gesture of comfort. She had to be mistaken. Right? This was Malfoy. She looked up from his hand to see he was already looking at her.

"Granger?" Malfoy said and raised an eyebrow. "Where are the arcade games?"

"Oh," Hermione said. "Er… I'll check." Hermione looked at the route maps and determined which bus would take them to the only arcade she knew of.

"What now?" Ari asked.

"We wait," Malfoy said.

"For what?"

"The bus. Each bus comes at certain time increments. Look for the bus with this number flashing above the windshield," Malfoy pointed to the route number.

"Then what?"

"We pay our fare and stay on it until we need to get off."

"But I thought they didn't listen to where you wanted to go?"

Hermione couldn't help be a little impressed at Malfoy's patience with Ari's questions. She could see the flicker in his jaw as his muscles tightened. "You can request them to stop at certain places. Like this bus stop," he explained and then when his eyes lit with an idea.

"Actually, you're gonna learn how to pay the fare." Malfoy pulled out his wallet. "This is how much one fare is. So I'll give you three times that amount. Put it in the box next the driver and get three punctured transfer slips of paper from him."

Ari bit his lip. "So, put money in the box and get papers from the driver?" he repeated uncertainly.

Malfoy nodded and slapped his back. "Nothing to it."

Ari's teeth pressed harder into his lip.

Hermione gently placed her hand on the back of Ari's head. "Don't worry. We'll help you if you need it." She shared a smile with Malfoy as Ari fidgeted and counted the money in his hand. It was odd, sharing a moment like this with Malfoy. Talking with him about the things they had. Had Malfoy always been like this? Every time they met he seemed like a different person. She wasn't really sure if it was because he was changing or she was. She wasn't dreading the extra time she was going to be spending with Malfoy that day and she wasn't sure how that had happened. Or how she felt about it.

* * *

Happy Valentine's day! The second half of my Valentine's two-shot is up too. Maybe you can get your fluff there because romance is still far away here. Though I'd say they are almost friendly in this chapter? Okay friendly might be overstating things... but at least civil? lol

And You have my beta, Fleur, to thank for this chapter because it really is a lot better than when I sent it to her :) Thank you again for your comments and kudos!


	25. The Arcade

The bus finally pulled up but Ari only stared up at it, biting his lip. Malfoy stepped behind him and shoved Ari towards the bus. "Come on, Ari. Nothing to it."

Ari tucked his head and stepped into the bus, jogging up the few steps onto the main level. Hermione and Malfoy followed, but Hermione couldn't help jabbing Malfoy as they climbed up. "I doubt you were so cool the first time you took public transport."

Malfoy raised an eyebrow and opened his mouth to reply but instead turned his head towards Ari and did a double take.

"Ari, you have to put them in one at a time."

Ari looked up just as the coins spilled from his hand onto the bus floor, bouncing and clinking chaotically.

Malfoy ran his hand through his hair and turned his eyes towards the ceiling briefly before scrambling to help Ari pick up the coins. Malfoy demonstrated with one of the coins and Ari followed suite with the rest before taking the tickets from the driver.

"Sorry," Hermione apologized to the driver, who looked impatient. He barely nodded before putting the bus back into gear.

Hermione realized that Malfoy and Ari still hadn't found a spot to sit and the driver wasn't going to wait before pulling out into traffic. She hurried down the aisle to warn them.

"Malfoy-"

He half turned to her just as the driver hit the accelerator.

Without a pole nearby to grab, Hermione bowled right into Malfoy's shoulder. She floundered a bit as she tried to gain her balance. Finally, she grabbed his arm and used her other hand to reach up to rub her cheek gingerly. "Ow."

"Granger…" Malfoy said slowly.

Hermione looked up to see a slight frown on his face, his gaze directed at her hand on his shoulder.

"Oh, sorry!" Hermione's hands immediately flew up in the universal signal of 'I'm not touching anything'.

Malfoy's frown deepened. "That's not what I… nevermind. Let's go sit there." He pointed to a set of three open seats.

Hermione nodded and rushed to be the first so she could sit with her back against the side of the bus. She leaned her forehead against the window, enjoying the combined cool of the window glass and warmth of the sun. Ari sat between them, pouting. Malfoy was ignoring both of them.

"You did a good job, Ari," Hermione encouraged, trying to cheer him up.

"How was I supposed to know the slot wouldn't get bigger," Ari muttered at his lap, his pout not changing at all.

"Sounds like someone forgot to explain Muggle things?" Hermione agreed, glancing at Malfoy to see if he heard the tease.

Malfoy leaned back against his chair, his legs stretched into the aisles. "Since Ari can't talk about this to his dad anyway, I don't have to worry about it."

"I can tell him about you going on the roof, though," Ari said stubbornly, turning a little pink.

"The roof," Hermione repeated, raising her eyebrows as she looked down at Ari.

"Yeah, with you earlier today. Dad said that when I went out with Malfoy he couldn't go off alone with girls."

"Is this an actual concern?" Hermione asked.

Malfoy rolled his eyes as Ari replied. "Well, I think he shouldn't go off alone with boys either."

"Oh?" Hermione asked with a faint smile. Malfoy was coloring now, just barely visible on his high cheekbones.

Malfoy groaned. "Ari," he said tersely, covering the blush on his face with his hand.

"What? I don't think you should leave me alone at all!" Ari said.

Hermione tried to smother a laugh.

"Stop insinuating that I'm leaving you alone to go 'have fun' with other people," Malfoy growled.

"I don't understand the Muggle world yet!" Ari said defensively. "You can't just leave me by myself out here!"

"No, no, I understand, Ari," Hermione tried to say seriously.

Malfoy threw up his hands and turned away to pointedly ignore them.

"So, Ari, ever been to an arcade before?" Hermione chose to change the subject.

"No. My friends keep talking about this DRR game that they play every time they come."

"DDR," Malfoy corrected.

"What?" Hermione asked in surprise.

"DDR. Stands for Dance Dance Revolution. It's an Asian game where you try to hit buttons with your feet," Malfoy turned back to explain.

"Erm… well that sounds…. Nice," Hermione said.

Ari didn't seem to notice her lack of enthusiasm. "Yeah, we've got to play it!"

"Okay, but, Malfoy, how do you know about it?"

"They're starting to put those things everywhere. I'm surprised you haven't seen a machine yet."

"Right, but not in Wizarding places, I would suppose. How do you even know about it?"

Malfoy shrugged. "I got bored. I'll show you some tips, Ari." He ruffled Ari's hair. "How does that sound?"

Ari smiled. The bus ride was short and they were quickly deposited across the street from a slightly run down building that housed 'Bill's Arcade.'

Upon entering, Ari made a beeline towards the nearest arcade game. Hermione and Malfoy entered behind him just as he pushed a quarter into the slot. A ball was released and Ari frantically pulled levers to try to direct its path through a maze. Unsurprisingly, Ari didn't win anything on his first try. After several of Ari's tries, Malfoy nudged him out of the way and got the ball into one of the winning slots on his first try.

"Luck." Hermione scoffed as the machine spat out tickets.

"That-" Malfoy waved the tickets in her face, "-was not luck. You try it-"

"Let's go find a game that actually requires skill," Hermione interrupted, pushing Malfoy away from the machine. "Ari?"

Ari pointed at another machine and they trooped over to it. It was a first-person shooter game.

"Er- I'll go find another game while you try this one out," Hermione said, quickly walking off as Ari fumbled for another quarter.

"Granger…" Malfoy looked up from examining the controls.

Hermione winced at the explosion of gunfire from the machine and quickly waved a hand at him before scrambled away before he could say anything else. She found a basketball-themed game towards the corner. The ill lighting in the arcade made the area very dark and she didn't like sitting there by herself. She wandered back only to find Malfoy and Ari at another game.

"You're next, Granger," Malfoy said over his shoulder as he wildly worked his controls. Hermione examined the game just as it proclaimed Malfoy the winner.

"I don't think-" she started.

"Come, on. Put your money where your mouth is," Malfoy baited.

"Any tips, Ari?" Hermione asked.

Ari shrugged. "It's kinda like the first game I played."

"A luck game, again?" Hermione asked.

"Scared you'll lose?" Malfoy asked, flipping a coin in his hand.

"You wish," Hermione answered, pulling out her own coin.

The game was more difficult than it looked, and, predictably, Malfoy won again.

"Let me guess… luck?" Malfoy smirked.

Hermione folded her arms. "I think it's more likely you've just played all these games before."

Malfoy shrugged. "Want to try your luck again?" He gestured towards the other games. "We could try a real luck game and see which of us of us is actually lucky."

Hermione shook her head. "They say that you are either lucky in life or in gambling and I already know which one I am."

Malfoy glanced down at her exposed arm and quickly back up at her, wearing a confused frown.

"I'm lucky to be alive," Hermione explained, pulling her face into a forced grin. She could feel the combination of environment and now her thoughts pulling her into one of her 'episodes.' She tried to hold the grin just to chase away some of the panicky feelings in the back of her mind.

Malfoy didn't seem to notice and snorted. "With Harry Potter and Ron Weasley as best friends, I'll agree there. But the saying actually goes 'unlucky in cards, luck in love.' Given your track record, I'd say it was the other way around. We'll have to find a poker game to be sure."

Hermione glanced at Ari, who was watching another arcade game. "We will do no such thing, especially with a minor in our custody!"

Malfoy merely leaned back against the game and rolled his eyes.

"We will be playing that." Hermione pointed to the basketball game. She tugged at Ari's shirt. "Doesn't that look good, Ari?"

Ari followed her gaze and then shrugged. "I guess I can at least beat Draco at this one," he replied.

Hermione shot Malfoy a victorious glance but he just rolled his eyes and followed. "Don't get too cocky, kid."

There were two baskets surrounded by a rope net with a slope that rolled the balls back to the player. At first, Ari was very clearly in the lead. Used to the ball and the set up, he kept up a pretty consistent pace of sinking balls into the basket with the occasional miss. Starting off, Malfoy's shots were too hard or too short, but gradually the shots he made were closer together. It wasn't surprising how quickly he caught on, Hermione assumed it was due to his height and general athleticism, and eventually Malfoy began to catch up with Ari's score.

Seeing the dilemma, Hermione decided to jump in to help. "I'll help you, Malfoy," Hermione said, reaching out to grab one of the balls.

Malfoy, too focused on the hoop, barely registered her and didn't reply. He made the shot and reached to grab another one. Hermione shoved the ball she was holding into his hands before he had grabbed one. He fumbled for a second, looking down at it and then back at her, and then he was back into his zone, making another shot. She dropped the second ball right before she gave it to him and Malfoy had to reach down to pick it up. The third ball was shoved towards him as he was trying to make the shot with the second ball. After Hermione picked up the next ball, Malfoy grabbed it. Surprised, and still determined to slow him down, Hermione didn't let go of the ball. Malfoy yanked at the ball and she was pulled closer to him.

"Granger," he growled into her ear. Hermione jumped, her primed system immediately pumping adrenaline into her system. "Calm down! Do you see the kids over my shoulder?"

Hermione took a calming breath and tried to relax enough to follow what he was saying. Seeing a chance, Malfoy jerked the ball out of her hands. "Hey!"

"Just look!" he hissed as he shot the ball.

She tried to breath normally again and then followed his instructions. She noted a group of kids about the same age as Ari loitering around a couple of the first-person shooter games. "So?"

"So, those are Ari's friends," Malfoy continued in his hissed tone.

Hermione shrugged to show she didn't follow.

The next time he grabbed a basketball he stepped closer to her and shot with one hand, not really looking. "So, this is a chance for him to spend time with them without his father knowing."

Hermione frowned in understanding and tilted her head towards the group of kids. She thought it over for the rest of the game while Malfoy went back to his fierce concentration on the hoop. Ari had never lost his concentration and was still well ahead of Malfoy even when the game drew to a close.

As the ending scores flashed, Ari didn't say anything but wore a proud smile. Hermione held out her hand and Ari high-fived it with an even wider smile.

"You'll be pretty good once you get taller," Malfoy told Ari.

"I'm already good," Ari said with a small pout. Malfoy just ruffled his hair and looked from towards the group of friends to Hermione with a raised eyebrow.

Hermione rolled her eyes and pointed towards a pink machine near the kids. "Look, Malfoy! I say we play this one next."

"Er, what? Granger-"

"No buts! I bet you haven't played this one and so won't have an unfair advantage this time." Hermione smiled at her cleverness.

Malfoy sighed and gave her a look before trudging over towards it. He gave it a once over. "What is the point of this game?

Hermione watched the default screen run through an example game. "Pop bubbles? Oh, but there's a frog over here and… shoes?"

"You've got to be kidding me," Malfoy groaned.

As they set up to play the game, Hermione could already tell that Ari's attention was wandering. She was pretty sure he didn't even watch as they played the first time.

"See?" Hermione said as they finished. "I told you've been winning because of an unfair advantage.

"Yeah?" Malfoy countered. "Just tell me why you won."

"Hmm… that. Probably because I was prettier than you."

Malfoy snorted. "This is ridiculous. Let's play something else."

Hermione shook her head and gestured with a nod towards Ari, who had already noticed his friends.

"On second thought," Malfoy said it a completely fake voice. "Let's play this. It's so fun."

"Hmmm?" Ari asked.

"Go play with your friends while I show Hermione up," Malfoy told him in a more normal tone, making a shewing motion with his hand.

Ari barely hesitated with a quick look between his friends and them before he quickly left to hail his friends.

"So, what happens next in your brilliant plan?" Hermione asked, watching the boys interact.

Malfoy looked at the game in disgust. "Definitely not this." He looked up and half-smiled. "You prepared to test the theory on a poker game now?"

Hermione spared him her prefect glare. "I doubt they have that type of thing here. I have a headache coming on and would rather just escape this place." She pointed. "I think I saw a café across the road."

Malfoy gave her a sideways. "You are asking me to ditch Ari to go off alone with a girl? After making fun of me about this very subject less than an hour ago?"

Hermione tried to fight the blush down as she realized what he was insinuating. "No, that's not what I mean. That's not what I'm saying." She paused as she saw Malfoy's smirk. "And you know that," she sighed to herself.

Malfoy shrugged. "I'm game."

"You don't have to come if you need to watch Ari."

Malfoy looked over to Ari, chatting happily with his friends. "I don't think I'm needed here."

Hermione didn't push, happy to finally get out of the arcade. "Okay, let's get out of here, then."

Malfoy caught Ari's attention and made gestures to indicate where they were going and that Ari was to stay where he was. Ari nodded in understanding and Malfoy turned to leave. Before Hermione turned she saw Ari give her a thumbs up. She frowned at him but Ari just grinned. What did the little ankle-biter think was going on?

* * *

A/N: Thank you, lovely readers, and I hope you enjoy the chapter!


	26. Draco Bloody Malfoy

They walked across the street, deliberated and decided on drinks, and found a table that could still view the entrance of the arcade.

Malfoy sat first, taking the seat nudged into the corner that Hermione had been eyeing. She glanced uncomfortably at the other two seats, both with entirely too much of the café behind her to be in her peripheral vision.

"Er… Malfoy? I'd like to sit there, actually. Would it be too much to take another seat?" She asked politely.

Malfoy looked up from his tea and stared at her, look away as he processed the information, and then looked back at her again with a quirked eyebrow. "You want… my seat?"

Hermione's lips thinned as she nodded and shifted anxiously.

He leaned over to glance at the other seats. "There's a problem with all three of the other chairs?"

"I'm… just more comfortable with my back against a wall."

Malfoy lifted an eyebrow.

"Forget it," Hermione grumbled. She sat down and stared down at her tea and focused on her breathing exercises.

"Hell, Granger, when you ask a bloke for his seat give him a chance to find out bloody why first."

Hermione, already feeling a little exposed, simply glared at him.

"You give me a good answer and I'll give it to you, Granger. I don't succumb to death glares."

It almost sounded like something she would say to Ron when he was throwing a tantrum. She reluctantly relented, not caring to be on the Ron side of this conversation.

"Because, Malfoy, I get anxious when I can't keep an eye on all possible angles," she gritted through her teeth.

"Angles?" Malfoy didn't sound like he was mocking, besides the little amount that was always in his voice when he asked a question. Hermione suspected he didn't even realize it was there anymore.

"Angles of attack."

Both eyebrows raised. "Ah." He got up and switched seats with her without saying anything more.

"Thanks," she muttered at her tea and then slipped into the seat.

He nodded.

They both nursed their tea as they waited for it to cool, lapsing into a silence that Hermione wasn't sure was awkward or not. It should have been. She was sitting across from Draco bloody Malfoy. Two childhood nemeses were sitting in a café and one of them had just told the other something rather personal.

It wasn't, though. Awkward. The only awkwardness stemmed from Hermione's expectation that it should be awkward.

The tea was good. Brewed well so the flavors melded together in her mouth. She got absorbed into enjoying it for a while before the conversation began again.

"The Muggles, they are good for Ari. I'm glad you want him to spend time with them," she said at last.

He nodded. "I want him to turn out differently." Malfoy didn't meet her eye, and was watching the eddies he made in his cup with his straw. She knew what he was saying.

"Good. I think with you in his life he has that chance."

Malfoy looked up, his eyes wide. "Really?" he asked sharply.

She nodded. It was true. She knew once she had said it out loud. Even if he was Draco bloody Malfoy.

His face pulled into several expressions and then he looked away. He said in a deep but soft voice. "Thanks."

"Maybe we can set up a mixed basketball game at the Wizard Children Club. I mean… have both Muggles and Wizards play together. Then Ari isn't disobeying his father and we introduce the other children to it as well."

Malfoy was already shaking his head before she finished.

"What?" she said.

"That wouldn't fly with the managers."

Hermione sighed and chewed her lip as she thought.

He stared as she did. "But... If they just so happen to show up at the same time as we are practicing, wouldn't it be suspicious if we didn't let them join?"

Hermione grinned. "Brilliant."

Malfoy's grin slowly widened in respone to her own.

They just stared at each other in their elation over the beginnings of this plan. It was great to have a cause again. Something she believed in and believed needed to be done. It had been a while since she had felt this… felt hope. Believed she could change something for the better. She reached out for a half hug him like she would have with Harry or Ron but Malfoy just froze awkwardly, a confused look across his face. She paused half way through the motion and patted his shoulder.

"Erm… we should do it on the Fridays we already work there. I can't spare much more time from my schoolwork."

Malfoy nodded and slumped down into his seat. "I've never worked this hard in my life," he whined.

Hermione frowned at him but said nothing, sipping her tea instead.

"I guess this is still easy for the great Hermione Granger," Malfoy said with an eye roll, his head almost level with the table as he stayed in his slumped position.

"I've had more classwork before," Hermione finally said. "However, there are other things that make it this a lot harder than anything else I've done school-wise."

Malfoy reached out and grabbed the cup that was barely within his reach from his position. He just held it. "So, in a way, you agree with me."

"We could work together," Hermione said. Those words were almost automatic with her friends when they were struggling. But this was Draco bloody Malfoy.

He sat up. "Together. You and Me. Studying?"

"You don't have to…" Hermione said, already feeling insulted.

"Granger, you were the one who snipped at me at the library a couple weeks ago. I'm just expressing surprise."

Hermione stared at him blankly.

"When I was asking about the Muggle Professions."

"You were serious?"

"What made you think otherwise?"

Hermione blinked a few times and then shrugged. "You are Draco bloody Malfoy," she said, her voice a little weak, a little mocking. The mocking was for herself, though.

"That is not my middle name," he said with a small smile, bringing his cup to his lips.

"I bet I'm not the only one who calls you that."

Malfoy shook his head with a bigger smile. "I'll be sure to tell my mother that she named me incorrectly."

Hermione's smile faltered a little. "Your mother. How is she?"

Malfoy looked away. "I hate everything that has happened to her because of that bloody war." His teeth were gritted and the casual easiness was gone.

"My parents have forbidden me from using magic in their home. I can't even put up a ward."

Malfoy looked at her, his eyebrows drawn together.

"I used magic on them to protect them. Took their memories so they couldn't be found."

Malfoy nodded in understanding. "I can use magic on her, but she needs a miracle."

Unsure what to say, Hermione said nothing.

The silence wasn't as pleasant this time, but there was no awkwardness. How strange that a few exchanges would let them sit so comfortably in each other's silence.

...

"Harry, what do you think of Malfoy?"

"You mean other than a sniveling entitled coward?"

Those words sounded familiar. Had she said them before? "I mean- do you think he is capable of doing something decent?"

There was silence on the other end.

"Harry?"

"What exactly has happened, Hermione?"

"I think he has changed. I… Harry, I think he is trying to become a better person. Do you think that is possible?"

"No, I don't. Haven't I warned you about him? Hermione- I- we don't want you to get hurt any worse."

"We're just talking about possible study partners, Harry."

"You mean you've decided to do something other than barely tolerate him? Hermione, you are visiting a shrink, right?"

Hermione laughed dryly. "Luna seems to like him."

"And we both know you are going to do whatever you want no matter what anyone says. What exactly has you so convinced that he has changed?"

"He's been given… a stewardship of sorts over this young boy. He sincerely wants to help him… even if it isn't always executed well."

"He's always taken his responsibilities seriously," Harry said, his voice a little tight.

"You mean he was probably always like this?"

"I mean his loyalty has always been strong. What makes you think he has changed loyalties?"

Hermione mused, "He doesn't call me a mudblood? Or treat me like he did when he thought of me as one?"

"Maybe it's just because of the change of opinion in the colonies? He might be up to something, Hermione. You shouldn't trust him. He's always going to be Draco sodding Malfoy. Even if he has changed, why would you want to spend time with someone who has treated you so poorly in the past?"

Hermione shrugged. Maybe she was lonely. However, she knew there was something more. "I've decided to forgive him," was all she told Harry.

"Forgive him?"

"I'm so tired of hating people, Harry. I'm tired of being angry." It was strange, that anger would be tiring. It used to be what pulled her through a day. "I want to help him with Ari. I want Ari to see life differently to Malfoy at that age."

"Oh. One of your causes."

"Why are you using that tone, Harry?"

"I'm betting this Ari is a pureblood?"

"Erm- I believe so."

"I'm saying that Malfoy is just learning to wear another mask. Even evil people are nice to their own kind. Don't trust him, Hermione."

Hermione sighed. "I'll be careful, Harry," she said to appease him. Apparently this part of Harry hadn't changed. The suspicion. Maybe that's how he coped with everything that had happened. Maybe it was safe to acknowledge Snape's heroism was because he was safely dead. No longer a viable suspect. Purposefully changing the topic, she asked, "How are things with Ginny?"

Harry groaned. "I have no idea."

Hermione spent the rest of the time until everyone else joined the call helping Harry work through his most recent worries and over-analyzing about Ginny.

With most of her weekend spent with Ari and Malfoy, Hermione had to kick her studying into high gear to stay ahead of her schoolwork. On Monday night she realized in order to keep to her schedule, she had to study with Malfoy the next day. She was a little nervous to ask him. He had agreed to be her study partner, but would he refuse if she tried to get him to study beforehand like Harry and Ron did? She was desperate, though. Putting it off would really wreck her time table.

The next day she steeled herself and caught Malfoy's arm as class was letting out.

"Hey, Malfoy."

He looked down at her hand and then up at her. "Yeah, Granger?"

"You know how you agreed to study together? Do you have time after school?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Today? I would have expected a little better planning from you."

Hermione colored and rolled her eyes. "Are you available or not?"

"For what, exactly?" Someone else had joined the conversation. Hermione turned to see John looking between them and grinning foolishly.

"Hello, John."

"You guys setting up a date? In the middle of the week? I thought you said weekdays were for studying, Hermione."

Hermione shot him an incredulous look. "We are setting up a studying time, John."

"Riiiiiight. Studying."

"Oh, and your studying time is 'studying'?" Hermione asked, mockingly repeating John's air quotes.

John looked over at Shandra and licked his lips unconsciously. He didn't answer.

"And I'm still not clear why we are doing it today, Granger," Malfoy cut in, clearly fed up with the stupid interchange.

Hermione turned to Malfoy and bit her lip anxiously. "I think it would be good to review the previous spells and do a little preliminary preparation for tomorrow."

Malfoy's lips pursed. "Forty five minutes max."

"Deal. Meet you after the last class in the library." Hermione paused, unsure how to end the interaction. She settled on sticking out her hand to shake. Malfoy looked down with a bemused expression.

"Erm, deal?" he said mockingly, giving her hand a quick, hard shake before turning to leave.

Hermione watched him leave, relieved that it had gone over well.

John, however, was still staring at Shandra.

* * *

A/N: What do you think of the developments this chapter? :3


	27. Study Night

At the scheduled time for her and Malfoy's study meeting, Hermione walked into the library to see Malfoy chatting with Shandra and John. Malfoy looked up as she approached. "Hey, Granger. Shandra plays basketball."

"Oh?" Hermione replied, wondering what his point was.

"Shandra can join us teaching the kids basketball."

"Oh," Hermione repeated, still not entirely enlightened.

"Shandra can bring Jordan who will then invite her muggle friends to join us," Malfoy said a little slowly. "So we can intermingle the purebloods with some muggle influence?"

"Oooh." Hermione turned to Shandra. "Daryn would let you take Jordan with you?"

Shandra inclined her head and popped a bubble in her gum. "I'm actually Jordan's step-aunt or something like that. Her Dad is my step-brother." Shandra shrugged. "I sometimes babysit but my side of the family isn't as close as his."

Hermione blinked and looked around the table for the other's responses to this new factoid. "None of you seemed surprised by this."

"Yeah, didn't you know?" John asked, tilting his chair back a little. "Wait… no, you don't. We talked about it when we planned your surprise party."

"Hmm," Hermione responded, trying to fight down the feeling of being left out. She glanced at her watch. "Has anyone started studying?"

"What, exactly, was your agenda, Granger?"

Hermione gave Malfoy a look. "You didn't have to agree to this Malfoy."

"But yet, I did." Malfoy leaned back and tucked his arms behind his head. "So, please, let me know what was so important that I interrupted my day for you."

Hermione quirked an eyebrow at him and yanked out her time table with lists of what needed to be done and when. She took the few steps towards and Malfoy and shoved it into his chest. At the sudden force, Malfoy grabbed her arm to keep from falling. Hermione pulled at his grip but he didn't release it.

"Hmm…" Malfoy glanced over the sheet. "Signum Vitalis? You really think that's what we should be focusing on? There is going to be a test on the new healing spells next week."

Hermione snatched it back with her free hand, tearing it a little. "Signum Vitalis is the spell that guides you to which spell to use. If you don't understand the inherent magical disorder behind the imbalance, how do you expect to properly use a spell meant to correct that ailment?"

Malfoy tilted his head to the side. "We practice the healing spells too and you've won me over."

Hermione smiled and looked over to the other two, but Shandra was already reading something and occasionally muttering about it and John was completely entranced by her mouth.

"Erm…" Hermione turned back to Malfoy, who merely smirked.

"Poor kid."

Hermione bit her lip as she leaned a little closer and asked, "When did this happen?"

Malfoy shrugged. "Beats me. Not the type to document my friends' love lives."

Hermione raised her eyebrows again but returned to her seat.

"Now, the spell," Hermione started but was distracted when Malfoy pulled out his wand and pointed it towards her. "Erm…" she trailed off and tried to swallow against the sudden dryness in her mouth.

His wand hand tiled downwards as he rested it against the desk to brace him as he leaned towards her. "Granger?"

"It's- It's nothing."

He shrugged and brought his hand up again. She flinched, she couldn't help it. Apparently working with Daryn in class had only made her used to Daryn.

He made an annoyed sound. "Granger, if you didn't want me to practice with you, why didn't you ask someone else?" He shifted forward in his seat, starting to push off the desk with his hands

Hermione reached out and grabbed his hand. "Sit down!" she hissed.

He stopped trying to leave and cocked his head at her.

She glanced nervously over at their classmates. Shandra was showing John the exact wand movements and neither of them had looked up. Still, she whispered. "Malfoy, it's not just you. I have a hard time when anyone points a wand at me. Just… Just warn me before you point your wand, please?"

His face froze in a little frown.

"Malfoy?"

His face didn't change but he said, "I'm going to try the spell out now, okay, Granger?"

She swallowed and nodded.

His wand raised and Malfoy held eye contact with her as it traced through the familiar pattern. Hermione's heart rate sped up but she tried to keep her breathing even. When the spell ended he looked down at his book and the moment broke.

"How are we supposed to tell between such infinitesimal color changes?" he grumbled.

"Once you get used to them, it's not that difficult," Hermione supplied.

"What about those people who don't distinguish between colors so easily?"

"Well, I know that isn't you, Malfoy. I've seen how you dress."

He looked up sharply. "How I dress?"

"It's just always… very coordinated. Yes. That's it," Hermione stumbled. She wasn't about to tell him that she had overheard some girls talking about how well he dressed in class and then started noticing it herself.

There was a bark of laughter from her right and she looked over to see John grinning.

"I did it! Did you see that? It was perfect!" he crowed.

Shandra patted his hand with a small smile. "Your practicing is really starting to show," she agreed. "I think you'll pass as long as we keep this up."

John punched the air with his fist and then stood up and did a victory dance similar to an American Football player's touch down celebration. It was infectious to watch and everybody smiled, even Malfoy. Celebration completed, he looked over at Hermione and Malfoy. "How far have you guys got?"

Hermione was about to say 'not very' but Malfoy beat her to it. "We got distracted by discussing my wardrobe," he drawled.

"We were not!" Hermione protested and then blushed when she was pinned down by the stares of both John and Shandra. "It was just a sentence out of the whole conversation," she amended.

Shandra rested her cheek on her hand and smiled a slow almost closed-lip smile. "So clothes were discussed, then?"

"Apparently Granger thinks I'm a well-dressed man," Malfoy agreed.

"Shut it! All of you!" Hermione said, trying to cover her embarrassment, and picked up her wand. "Let's get back to the actual point of being here." She turned and pointed her wand at Malfoy. His fingers twitched almost imperceptibly around his wand. She dropped her wand's point. Maybe Malfoy had the same problems as she did.

She looked away to catch Shandra and John sharing a look before looking back at them. "What?" she asked defensively.

Shandra smirked and John winked. They were not thinking- Hermione sighed. Yes, they were. She rolled her eyes and proceeded to ignore them.

"Erm, what do you think you would follow that spell with in the clinic?" she asked Malfoy.

Malfoy was arching an eyebrow at John but turned when she spoke. "Well, if I've got this right, it looks like you do have an imbalance. Hmmm… I think I would test your magical balances first."

"What about the basic functions of the other systems?" Hermione argued. "Why the magical one first? It's part of this almost blind view of the magical culture-"

"Granger, calm down. You don't look in physical distress- well, other than getting worked up about the 'blindness of our culture.'" Hermione's mouth twitched but he continued, "Our lives are saturated by magic. Might as well rule it out at the very least."

"Ooh, he's got you there, Hermione!" John cracked.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Yes, thank you, John."

"Ready, Granger?" Malfoy had his hand on his wand.

Hermione inhaled then nodded.

He performed the spell. He cocked his head and started muttering over his book again. "If I keep practicing on you, I'll never know what normal is, Granger."

"But you get to see what abnormal is," Hermione reasoned. "Actually try out some clinical reasoning."

"You're still taking those potions, aren't you?"

Hermione shrugged. "So?"

"Prolonged potion use can affect your magic."

"I know, Malfoy, I was in that class too. That's why I'm taking potions to counteract it."

Malfoy ran his fingers through his hair and raised an eyebrow but continued their previous line of conversation. "So, potions explain the magical imbalances, mostly. Ready for the next one?"

And so Malfoy ran through the various diagnostics spells as Hermione patiently sat through them. Each time, Malfoy would warn her before lifting his wand. Slowly, Hermione's heart stopped pounding each time his wand was pointed at her. She could feel the tightness in her chest slowly loosening.

He ran through the healing spells after that. None of them were very complex but it was difficult to produce them properly without the ailment.

In the middle of one of the spells, Hermione interrupted, "No, no, that's not how you do it. There was intention there. How do you expect it to actually affect a person's-"

"How do you know my intentions, Granger?" Malfoy retorted as he flipped his wand in his fingers. "Want a tour of my head?"

"With all the room your ego takes up, I don't think I'd fit."

"Ah, you're right. All that hair sure wouldn't."

"Now, listen-"

"Switch!" John yelled cheerfully.

Hermione and Malfoy paused to look up.

"Partners," John clarified. "Let's switch partners."

"Are you sure?" Hermione asked.

"Ah, well, Shandra said it would be good practice for the exam," John said with a little laugh.

Shandra smiled blandly at all of them.

"Draco, my man, show me all your secrets," John said cheerfully.

Hermione switched desks to sit across from Shandra. "Is it alright if I start?" Hermione asked.

Because she had watched Malfoy and had gone into lengthy conversations about the spells, Hermione made quick work of the spells and it only took her a few tries to iron out even the more difficult ones.

"I guess they don't call you the 'Brightest Witch of her Age' for nothing," Shandra said admiringly.

"And it sells," Hermione added. "Nothing like one of the Golden Trio's own personal titles to catch the eye."

"Hmm… maybe that's part of it, but I just saw you in action. So, what was Draco's title in school? He never talks about it."

"Git," Hermione deadpanned. She saw Malfoy's head tilt in their direction.

"Git? No way was his nickname git," Shandra scoffed.

"Oh, you're right. There were generally expletives sprinkled in as well."

Hermione heard Malfoy snort.

"But surely if someone said 'The Git' nobody knew who you were talking about."

"It was a pretty easy to guess if you were given two chances," Hermione said.

Shandra pursed her lips and her eyebrows scrunched down. "Draco, is she really telling the truth?"

Malfoy shrugged. "I'd say git was one of the tamer titles I was given."

"What did you call her?"

"Swotty Gryffindor Princess, Bushy-haired-"

Hermione held a hand up. "I don't want to hear it, Malfoy."

"I haven't even gotten to the best ones."

"Just finish the spell practice, guys," Hermione groaned, turning back to Shandra.

Shandra leaned forward and tilted her face away from the boys. "So, finally seen how good Malfoy is?"

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "You have very little comprehension of the situation, Shandra."

Shandra merely gave her a look from underneath her eyelashes.

"Really," Hermione affirmed in the face of Shandra's skepticism. "Anyway, can you come to the Wizard Children's Club on Friday?"

Shandra agreed and they started hammering out details until the librarian came and told them to leave.

"We weren't being that loud," John complained.

"It's closing time," corrected Hermione. "We've been here for hours!" She was cut off by a huge yawn.

"Don't forget about Daryn's Halloween gig this weekend!" Shandra called as they lined up to use the floos.

Everyone assented and left for their apartments.

Hermione expected to come home and fall into her bed exhausted. Instead she came home to Luna running past her frantically.

"Luna? Luna what's wrong?"

"There are reports of a rash of Tiyanak sightings along the coast!" Luna called over her shoulder as she pushed various vials into her bag.

"But it's almost ten o' clock! You don't have to check it out right away, do you?"

"It's actually really important, Hermione. Tiyanak often follow the presence of Dementors."

"Dementors?" Hermione took a moment to catch her breath. "I've never heard of that. Are you sure?"

Luna didn't bother replying and zipped up her bag. Luna tucked her hair back and then caught sight of Hermione's face.

"There have been no Dementor sightings, Hermione," she said gently. "It's important to check this, but you aren't in danger."

Hermione tried to smile. Luna pulled Hermione into a quick half-hug and then was gone through the floo.

"Dementors," Hermione muttered to herself. "No… It can't be. There haven't been any reports. No unusual killings in the news. We're fine. I'm fine." Still, her hands were shaking.

It took a long time to fall asleep that night.

* * *

AN: Hopefully I can get a few more plot points kicked into action in the next few chapters. <3 Sam


	28. In which there is a test

On Sunday Hermione awoke to the now typical sound of the telephone ringing. She rolled out of bed and tried to shake off the exhaustion of another bad night. Rubbing her hand across her face, she yawned and then staggered to the phone to pick it up.

"Hey, Harry. What's the news on Ginny?"

"On me?" A much higher voice asked than Hermione had been expecting.

"Oh, Merlin," Hermione muttered to herself. "Er, hi, Ginny. Where is Harry?"

"Still out with Ron on a mission."

"Mission? What mission?" Hermione gripped the telephone tightly. "Ginny, have there been any unusual sightings or activity recently?"

"You can't distract me, Hermione."

Hermione gave the phone a disbelieving stare. "What?"

"Why are you and Harry talking about me? He's not thinking about breaking up with me is he? He has been saying such weird things lately!" Ginny's voice had progressively gotten higher the longer she talked.

"Er, no nothing like that, Ginny. He's just being a guy." Hermione waved away the concerns with a hand that Ginny couldn't see. "But, really, do you know anything about Dementors sightings or Death Eaters or anything like that? Do you know what their mission was about?"

"They are Aurors, Hermione. Of course I don't," Ginny dismissed casually. "Now explain what you mean by 'being a guy.' He keeps saying things like: Are you more of a career woman than someone like your mom? So, you want to travel a lot? Do you actually like Godric's Hollow? I think he's looking for an excuse to break up!"

"No," Hermione stated flatly.

"No what?" Ginny asked, exasperated.

"He just cares about you and wants to know more about you."

"Why doesn't he just come out and say it?"

"Say what?" came a muffled voice on Ginny's side.

"Oh, hi, Harry," Ginny said. Hermione could hear the subtle smack of a kiss on the other end.

"You guys talking about some guy Hermione met?"

"Actually," Ginny replied. "We were talking about you."

"I accidentally told Ginny we've been talking about her," Hermione said quickly into the phone. "She thinks you want to break up. Just explain everything, already." She was tired of listening to Harry agonize over this.

"Right, we've got to talk, Harry," Ginny said.

"Erm… okay." Hermione could hear Harry's flustered voice and the following gulp.

"Wait, guys, what about-" Hermione heard the click of the receiver and the following dial tone, "-Dementors," she finished to herself. She was sorely tempted to call back but figured she would let the two lovebirds talk through whatever mess of misunderstandings they had. She sighed and returned the phone to the hook on the wall. "Dammit."

…

Hermione hadn't seen Luna on Saturday because she was holed up at the library the whole day. She didn't see Luna all of Sunday either. In fact, She had only seen Luna once that week and it was only because she had been unable to sleep last night and was wandering the house at an ungodly hour. Luna had come in with her hair full of tangles and branches and deep bags under her eyes. When Hermione had tried to question Luna, Luna had just shook her head and told Hermione she was very, very tired and couldn't they talk tomorrow. When Hermione got up the next morning she had overslept and was in too big of a hurry to even try to see if Luna was still home.

The rest of the week was spent cramming for the tests. Her group had taken to studying with each other at the library and on Wednesday the air vibrated with anxiety as they prepped for the test the next day. They barely sat down and John was already yammering on about what would happen if he failed the test. Shandra's voice was higher and she would randomly burst into high-pitched giggles at things people would say. Malfoy's hands moved restlessly from his hair to his sleeve cuffs and up to his top shirt button, but he didn't say anything more than usual.

Hermione gripped her arms and tried to just breathe through it all. She was so used to everyone around her only panicking right before the test but now it just felt like everyone was feeding off of each other's hysteria. Between her worry about Luna and this tightly strung atmosphere, her hands were beginning to shake and her mouth was going dry. She slipped her hand into her bag and pulled out a small potion. Before anyone could notice, she knocked it back.

"What was that, Granger?"

Hermione jolted and looked up to see Malfoy eyeing the vial that she was stuffing back into her bag.

"Just a pepper-up potion."

Malfoy looked at her ear pointedly. "Liar."

She shrugged and smiled benignly. "Let's review what the Professor said would be on the test tomorrow."

Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Your life, Granger."

"Exactly," she said and purposefully widened her smile. "I'll start."

…

Because it was a practical exam, everyone took the test at different times. The students not taking the test were milling about the hallways or had hidden in an abandoned classroom to for last minute practice. On the door of the classroom three separate sign up lists were taped where everyone had signed up for a time. It was unknown which ones were going to have the Professor as the grader and which were to be graded by the Professor's teaching assistants. It was a subject of debate which lists were associated with which grader. The smart ones had pounced on the students who had taken the test earlier to ask who they had had the test from. Everyone was praying that they landed the easier grading assistant, except, of course, Hermione.

When Hermione entered one of the smaller classrooms she smiled when she saw Professor Greythorne sitting at the far end of the room with a student. With hardly a prelude, the Professor had Hermione perform the spells on the student. Hermione was able to do all of them easily, but that didn't stop her breathing from picking up and Hermione having to pause frequently to ensure she didn't stutter. When she finished, the Professor pinned her down with a blank stare.

"That will be all, Miss Park."

Startled, Hermione watched as the other student ducked her head and left the room. The Professor's face hadn't changed and Hermione tried to swallow despite her dry mouth. She must have done something horribly wrong.

Finally, the Professor spoke. "Well done, Hermione. You have shown an improvement in your understanding of the spells' interaction with the patient." Hermione felt her shoulders relax a little. "However, your spells showed a subtle weakening as you progressed through the exam. Did you stop taking those potions that caused you that episode earlier? It would be rather hypocritical not to respect the guidelines your own profession has made."

"Yes, Professor," Hermione mumbled at the ground.

"Very well. Stay here as the subject for the next student."

Hermione sat through the next test and tried not let thoughts creep in about how much better her spells were, even if there was a 'subtle weakening.' Once the student was done, Hermione left the classroom. She wandered down the hallway, thinking hard about how she could possibly change her potion consumption while still maintaining her routine and sanity.

"Hermy!" Someone jumped her from the side and she immediately pressed herself against the wall and had her wand at their throat. "Um. Hermione?"

Hermione quickly lowered her wand. "Sorry, John, you just surprised me. What is it?"

"Who did you have? I got the cute girl and she graded easy! I'm so glad she didn't look too hard at my Qualitas Anima spell." John scratched the back of his head. "Never really understood that one."

"Why, too busy watching Shandra's lips?" Hermione turned to see the speaker, Malfoy, sauntering towards them. "What are you guys doing up against the wall?"

Hermione looked up at John, who still was semi-trapping her against the wall. "Er, nothing." She shoved him off of her. "John, please don't invade my personal space."

"That's what friends do right, Herms?" John slapped her on the shoulder.

Hermione tried not to wince. "That's not my name, John"

"Yeah, that's the..." John trailed off as he looked over her shoulder. "Shandra! How did you do?" He bound off in the direction he had spotted her.

"Herms?" Malfoy asked. He leaned against the wall farther away from her than John had been and rested his head back onto the wall.

Hermione could still see the smirk that played on his lips. She had a feeling that that nickname would come back to haunt her. She rubbed her temples. "I will use Ginny's bat-bogey spell on you if you even think of using that 'nickname.'"

Malfoy snorted. "We'll see about that. In return I'll practice _Follicosis _on you."

Hermione's reply was cut short by loud yawn from Daryn as he approached them.

"Hey guys, you seen Shandra or John?"

Hermione shrugged and Malfoy said, "John's probably trying to make eyes at Shandra somewhere."

"He what?" Daryn looked between them with a little drown.

"Er, nothing." Hermione jumped in. "How'd you do?"

"Fine, I think? I was mostly preoccupied with the feeling that I'm going to die of sleep deprivation." Daryn leaned against the wall with them. His eyes had dark bruises under them and he barely was keeping his eyes open. He swiped a hand over his face and yawned. "You guys going to the Halloween gig?"

"Of course we'll be there," Hermione assured him. "Go home and sleep! It won't go very well if you keep yawning in the middle of a song."

Daryn waved a grateful hand and pushed himself off of the wall. "See you guys tomorrow?"

They agreed and he wandered towards the floos.

"He looks like if a Dementor so much as inhaled near him his soul would slip out," Malfoy muttered.

Hermione gasped and then slammed her hand over her mouth.

"What?" Malfoy asked, scanning the area around them before scowling at her.

"Dementors. I've got to ask Luna about the Dementors." Hermione turned to bolt for the floos. Malfoy grabbed her arm before she got anywhere.

"Granger, explain. What Dementors?" His hand gripped harder around her arm.

"Ouch!" Hermione tried to shake him off.

"Er, sorry." Malfoy immediately let go. "It's just…" He used the hand that had been holding her arm to tousle his hair. "Granger, I- Are you sure? They've seen Dementors?"

"Oh, just-" Hermione waved for him to follow, "-come on." She immediately took off towards the floo with Malfoy in tow. "Luna said that there were Tiyanak sightings. She says that Tiyanak follow Dementors."

Malfoy tugged on her sleeve to slow her down. "We are talking about the same Luna, right? Loony Luna? Snargles and snoogles?"

"Nargles," Hermione corrected. "That's why I need to ask her before she disappears again! She has had some moments before, you know. And she did become a Magizoologist." She poked her finger towards Malfoy.

Malfoy raised his hands. "Okay, asking Loony it is."

Hermione sniffed and grabbed some floo powder. She called out her apartment and stepped in. Malfoy followed her into the floo and Hermione was trapped between his bulk and the brick wall.

"Ouch!" She hissed as they were engulfed in green flames. "Malfoy!" They were pulled into her own fireplace. "Get off of me!" She shoved at him as her heart rate picked up. "I don't like small spaces and I didn't invite you!"

Impervious to her shoves, Malfoy slowly ducked out of her fireplace. "No, I invited myself and you didn't object."

Hermione followed him and took a deep breath to clear her head. She then stood at her tallest, crossing her arms and frowning disapprovingly. "Not the same thing."

Malfoy shrugged.

She sighed. "Let's just find Luna-"

Malfoy smirked and pointed behind her. Hermione turned to see Luna and Rolf sitting on the sofa watching them.

"Er, there you are, Luna."

"Hello. We're almost done with the love couch if you two want to use it," Luna said with a sleepy smile. Her head was tilted to rest on Rolf's shoulder.

"Erm, it's a love seat, and that's not what we want-"

Rolf looked up at them and back to Luna. "Luna, dear, you really need to sleep." He jumped off of the love seat awkwardly and then addressed the room at large. "I only escorted Luna here because I believed that Miss Granger was here." Rolf reached down and pulled Luna's hand to his lips. "Until tomorrow, Luna," he murmured and tenderly kissed her fingers before setting her hand down in her lap. He stood up tall and did an odd little tap of his feet together and then scrambled for the floo.

Hermione watched him disappear and then shook her head and smiled. She turned back to Luna but was distracted by the face Malfoy was making.

"Are they dating?" he asked, a little frown pulling on one side of his face. "Or courting?"

"Er, what? Maybe?" Hermione answered and turned to get affirmation from the source. "Luna?"

Luna didn't respond. Her head had slid to lay on the armrest. She sighed a little and nestled deeper into the cushions.

Hermione quietly groaned. "We should probably let her sleep." She reached her arm towards Luna and then pulled it back and pushed it against her mouth. "It will be fine. I can wait another day."

Malfoy turned her away from Luna. "It's just the Tinniyak, anyway. Mr. 70s would have told us if there were any real danger."

"Tiyanak. Rolf," Hermione automatically corrected.

"Come on." Malfoy continued to push Hermione towards the kitchen.

She let him but stopped once they reached the dining table as she realized something. "What are you still doing in my apartment, Malfoy?"

"Because, Granger, I need the eccentricities of the Muggle culture explained."

"You want to spend a few years sitting here while I explain them?"

Malfoy sighed, but sat down at her table. "No, Granger, just one in particular."

Hermione crossed the room and poured herself a glass of water. "I guess I can share my wealth of knowledge." That triggered a past conversation and she added, "Though, I'll have you know I'm not an encyclopedia either. Water?"

He snorted at her encyclopedia quip and then shook his head. "Shandra said we were to dress up for this… Halloween celebration."

Hermione drank her water as she waited.

"Is this a real practice?"

"Dressing up on Halloween?" Hermione laughed. "Amongst Muggles, yes."

"And what do Muggles typically dress up as? How do you know what to wear?"

"What did Shandra tell you?"

Malfoy traced a pattern in the wood before looking up. "She said I would be a good Jack."

"Jack? What does that mean? Jack what?"

Malfoy shrugged and looked away. "I didn't ask."

Hermione finished off her glass and set it down with a clank. "And why not?"

"Because I thought it might be common knowledge."

"Because you didn't want to look like an idiot, you mean?"

Malfoy shoved the chair away from the table and it made a loud screech along the floor. They both paused and listened for any noises from the other room. When none came, Malfoy stalked towards her.

Hermione leaned against the sink and folded her arms. He came very close and narrowed his eyes. "Now," he started but then closed his mouth. He looked up towards the ceiling and back down at her. "Just explain this stupid Muggle protocol for Halloween."

Once Malfoy leaned back, Hermione grinned as she imagined all the things that she could tell him to dress up as. He would probably do it, too. He was still so scared of blowing his cover.

He backed up and crossed his own arms. "The goody-girl Gryffindor wouldn't lie to me, would you?"

Hermione grinned again but let the idea ago. "Muggles dress up like whatever they want to on Halloween. It used to be to dress up like caricatures of supernatural creatures, like witches and vampires. Now it is anything in pop culture that is iconic enough to be recognized."

"Pop culture?"

"Movies, sometimes books, pirates and princesses," Hermione shrugged.

Malfoy smirked. "Going as the Gryffindor Princess?"

Hermione turned away from him. "Hardly. I'm going as Bridget Wenlock." At his blank look she continued, "The famous Arithmancer. You should at least know her from the chocolate frog cards!"

Malfoy chuckled. "I ate much superior sweets as a child."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Right, I forgot who I was speaking with."

"So, pop culture things, like movies."

Hermione nodded.

"Thanks, Granger. And, by all indications, that Rolf man is courting your roommate."

She followed him out to her floo. "What?"

Malfoy paused with the floo powder in his hand and he looked over his shoulder to tell her, "It's a trade in information, Granger. You answered my question and I answered yours."

"What-" He disappeared into the green flames of the floo, "-question?" Hermione finished. She rested her head against the brick fireplace and muttered to herself, "Bloody Slytherins."

* * *

Thank you guys for reading! I'd love to know what you think. Take care of yourselves :)


	29. The Halloween Concert

Hermione had expected Wizarding New York to be heated the night of the festivities and so was surprised by the blast of cold air that met her as she left the café she had used to floo in. She cast a warming spell and rubbed her arms to shake of the chill.

"Hermione! Hermione? That's you, right?"

Hermione turned and had to take a double-take at the bespectacled wizard calling her name.

"Er… John? You aren't dressed up as-"

"Harry Potter? Heck yeah, I am." John pulled up his spelled-black hair to reveal a lightning bolt drawn in pen.

"John, why would you-"

"Yeah, I know, I should have guessed so many other people would dress like him too."

"There's more?" Hermione muttered to herself. She rubbed her forehead as she took in John's costume and then glanced across the crowd, trying to guess which dark-haired wizards were dressed as her best friend as well. Instead she caught sight of dark-haired man who looked like Malfoy. Wait.

"Is that Malfoy?" Hermione asked John and pointed.

"Oh, and there's Shandra!" John said cheerily and they started making their way over to the small table they had secured.

Shandra was tucked under Malfoy's cloak and was chatting animatedly. When John and Hermione arrived, Malfoy looked up and eyed their costumes.

"Ah, another Harry Potter," he deadpanned.

Hermione got a better look at Malfoy's costume and raised an eyebrow. "You… you didn't dress up as Harry too, did you?"

Malfoy sat up straight. "Potter?" he spat. "Hell no. I'm Morpheus." He slid down the sunglasses from his head and pulled a gun replica from his belt to wave it at her. "See? No Prat-Who-Survived here."

"Morph-who?"

Malfoy tilted his head back to rest on his chair and pulled his sunglasses up for a second before sighing. "Samir said it was a popular movie."

"Samir?" Hermione asked.

Malfoy waved the question away.

"Don't worry, Draco. I got the reference," Shandra said, putting her hand on Malfoy's shoulder. "The Matrix. Very cool."

"Yeah, it is cool," John jumped in, pulling out a chair to sit down. "We should go see the sequel together. That'd be fun, right?"

"Sure," Shandra said, leaning her head towards Malfoy. "Though, why didn't you dress up as Jack?"

"Jack who?" Hermione asked. Malfoy turned and gave her a small smile, just barely tugging at the ends of his mouth. Hermione nodded back, though, really, she was curious as well.

"Jack from Titanic? And I'm Rose?" Shandra gestured to her hair and wardrobe. "I didn't even have to spell my hair-color. It's so romantic and her clothes are so sophisticated." She used a glove hand to play with the diamonds at her throat.

"Is this a movie about the ill-fated ship, Titanic?" Hermione asked,

"It only came out 5 years ago, where have you been, under a rock?"

"I was probably running for my life about then," Hermione answered, crossing her arms in front of her.

"Oh." The conversation died with that. They all stared off at the crowds or very specific people, respectively, and tried to ignore the awkward silence.

However, it didn't last long before the sound of a Sonorused voice echoed across the courtyard.

"Welcome wizards and witches, we're Thestral Teeth and we're going to start off your Halloween night with some spooky fun!"

There was a bang and the courtyard was filled with a heavy ink of darkness. Almost immediately there were mutters of Lumos and other light spells from the tables around them, but none of them worked. Hermione felt for the table and tried to ignore the squeezing in her chest and the terrible certainty that there was something sneaking up behind her. Something grabbed her hand. She bit back her scream when she felt the gentle grip of a larger hand. She used her thumb to explore the fingers to try to determine who it was. The nails were cut short with a callous on the middle finger.

The Sonorused voice broke in with creepy cartoon-villain laughter. She squeezed the hand. The hand's owner squeezed back. As the darkness started to clear, organ music began playing, a haunting piece similar to that of the Phantom of the Opera. She immediately looked towards her hand as the person started to let go. It was still hazy but she was pretty sure she saw Malfoy pulling back his hand.

"We promised you a show! Let's get started!" the band member shouted.

Through the haze a few strobe lights silhouetted the rest of the band members and, once the audience had time to notice them, several whiz-bangs were set off. Hermione jumped but tried to calm herself quickly. It seemed like the Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes products were starting to pick up a following even overseas. She took a breath and forced herself to smile. She wasn't going to let this ruin her night. In the midst of the loud bangs and sparking rockets flying around the courtyard, the band started into a lively rock song with the organ music still in the background.

"Whoooo!" John yelled and Hermione flinched away from the sound. She rubbed her ear as she tried to determine which band member was Daryn. Even though most of the darkness dissipated, Hermione still couldn't make out the band members well as she kept getting blinded by the strobe lights. As she stared, one of the whiz-bangs flew past and lit up a saxophonist with a big afro and bellbottom jeans.

"Is Daryn dressed up as someone from the 70's?" Hermione had to yell over the music.

"Oh, it's so cute! He had me grow his hair out and help him style it!" Shandra yelled back. "Who knew that afros could look that good, right?"

Hermione could barely make out his outline, let alone see how he wore his afro, so she just smiled and shrugged. Of the next couple of songs, Hermione recognized quite a few from when she had stayed over at the Weasleys and her Halloweens at Hogwarts. When the band started a song called 'The Witching Hour', Shandra jumped up and started pulling Malfoy towards the center of the courtyard where there was already a group of people milling around dancing.

"Come on!" Shandra yelled. "Let's go dance; I love this song!"

Malfoy resisted a little before letting himself get pulled into the dancing mass. John intently watched them go before he turned and grabbed Hermione's hand.

"Let's go too!"

"I don't dance!" Hermione protested and tried to shake off his hand. Already she felt the relative safety from being with the group dissipating.

"It doesn't matter! We'll go find Shandra and Draco. We can form a little circle and yell the lyrics at each other!" John was smiling and bouncing with energy.

Hermione wasn't sure what he thought was persuasive about that statement but she let him tug her out of her seat. At least in the crowd it would be harder for someone to hunt her.

They submerged into the crowd and were surrounded by flailing arms and some couples grinding. Hermione was shoved up against John just avoid getting hit in the face.

"How can we find them?" Hermione yelled into John's ear.

"Look for Shandra's hair!"

It proved to be good advice and they found her bright red hair towards the middle of the crowd. Shandra and Malfoy were slightly joined to a circle of dancers, and Shandra was kicking her feet around and yelling the words. Malfoy was doing a side-step and tap that was the staple of most of the guys not engrossed in a partner. John immediately joined the group and started jumping around. Hermione hung back and stared at her friends' spectacle.

"Come on, Hermione!"

Hermione shrugged. "I don't dance!"

John tugged her into the group. "Everybody dances!" He waved his arms around over his head and stared at her expectantly. Hermione did a swaying step back and forth to try to appease him. Apparently satisfied, John went back to his jumping and joined Shandra's yelling. The jumping continued for the rest of the songs except for being replaced by bouncing on his feet during the slower songs.

Hermione felt an odd sense of disconnect as she 'danced' in her group. It was similar to the trepidation she had felt at Bill and Fleur's wedding, but now she wasn't sure what she was waiting for. It was nothing like the past Halloween celebrations she had been to, but she thought that was more her fault than anything. She felt more like a tense protector of a hen house, albeit one full of rock music, rather than an innocent party-goer. Everyone's carefree spirit just made her feel like she had to be more on-guard.

She couldn't really hear the music any more as she concentrated on getting breath in and out of her lungs. She was about to slide down onto her knees on the floor when someone grabbed her hand again. It was Malfoy. She looked up at him with a frown.

"Slow dance," he explained and pulled her closer so his other hand was on her back. He started guiding her into a tiny boxed dance. Hermione frowned harder but allowed him to take her through the steps. It was like a waltz, but with a few variations. Malfoy was a good enough lead that she could fake the parts she didn't know.

"I've got a portkey to my apartment in my pocket."

"Malfoy-"

"That wasn't a pick up line, Granger. I mean we've got a way out of here. I saw Aurors at every entrance. The magical security has been upped pretty much everywhere ever since the war."

Hermione couldn't help a pathetic laugh and gripped him harder. It was strange. It should have been surreal, slow dancing with Malfoy, but instead it seemed to ground her. She had to concentrate on the pressure of his hand on her back to determine where he was leading her. He led her through two dances, complicating the dance as she grew used to his patterns, and then deposited her back on her spot when the music picked up again. Her anxiety turned down to a manageable level, Hermione tried to pretend it had never happened so as to not shut down from overthinking things. Malfoy was back to his step-tap dance and the occasionally flirting with girls who slid up next to him.

Then, after possibly thirty minutes of music, the band paused and the lead singer spoke into the mic.

"How's everyone doing out there?"

He was met by cheers from the people standing the closest to the front.

"We've got one last song before we'll take a break and the next band, Benny & the Vampires, takes over. It's an original piece we've been working on just for tonight. Stay right where you are because it's got a jumping chorus and we plan on going out with a bang!"

Without any further ado, one of the guitarists struck his electric guitar and a loud jangling chord echoed over the crowd.

"I said I'm no ghost!" the singer cried into the microphone.

The guitarist started a rapid tattoo as the singer continued to crone and then the drums and saxophone each joined in. The singer pulled out a tambourine and started emphasizing his words with a 'ching' against his thigh as he started the chorus.

"I can't wait for centuries.

This lonely heart beats for you,

But it still gushes my hot blood.

I can't keep haunting your corridors.

I can't keep haunting your shadows.

I can't, just can't, keep haunting you.

Becaauuse, oh baby, can't you see,

I'm no ghost!"

The last word reverberating for a few long seconds and then a spell was used to shoot off sparkly fireworks. Hermione knew they were coming this time and so she only flinched a little.

"Thanks for jamming out with us, everybody! Again, we're Thestral Teeth! We'll be at our booth for the rest of the evening. Make sure to stop by when the night is young and you'll still remember it tomorrow morning!"

There was a general guffaw and groan from the more vocal section of the crowd. Another whiz-bang was set off and the band disappeared in the smoke. This one did surprise Hermione and she jumped.

"I'm starving and I need a drink!" Shandra huffed once the whiz-bang had sputtered out. Then she noticed she was covered in a glistening layer of sweat. "And a bathroom," she added as she slicked her hair off of her neck.

"What do you want, Shandra?" John asked. "Draco and I can get it while you're freshening up."

"Dippin' Dots! I saw a stand when we came in. But, mmm… the sliders at the bar looked good. And a cocktail. With red currant rum."

"I'll get the Dippin' Dots," Malfoy said. Hermione turned to look at him in surprise. "What, do you want some?" he asked, folding his arms.

Hermione hid her shaking hands under her arms as she considered. "Yes, please. The strawberry ones."

"Oh, and, Granger-" Malfoy leaned in towards her ear and muttered, "-get me some of those sliders as long as they don't have alcohol in them."

"Er, sure." Hermione gave Malfoy a look before turning to John. "I'll come with you to help carry everything."

"No drinks for you?" John called to Malfoy as he was already leaving.

"No alcohol," Malfoy confirmed, not bothering to turn around.

They split up and Hermione and John starting making their way back through the slowly dissipating crowd of sweaty costumed dancers. Everyone else had similar ideas and so Hermione and John headed towards one of the bars a little farther away that wasn't getting quite as many customers. Despite Hermione not being very familar with the area yet, it was pretty easy to follow the light from the heavily lit windows of the shops that were still open.

The bar was pleasantly warm and almost blindingly bright after the dark cool outside. It would have been perfect with half the people. Hermione carefully read the menu as John ordered and used the time to regroup away from the crowd of people. It seemed like one of the sliders was okay, but the others had an alcohol cooked into the bun. Hermione told John to order them for Malfoy.

"And what about you?" John asked.

Hermione shrugged. She had eaten before she came and her stomach was in knots anyway. "Just a Butterbeer."

"Aw, Hermione, come on. I want to see you at least a little tipsy," John wheedled.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Which is exactly why I'll stick to Butterbeer, thanks."

John finished the order and they returned back into the chill of the night to the table where they had started. Malfoy was there with three Dippin' Dots cups and he had already started on his vanilla-flavored one.

"A cocktail for you, Hermione's boring Butterbeer, and my Dragon Scale," John said as he handed out the drinks.

"I got chocolate for you, Shandra," Malfoy added.

"Thanks!" Shandra looked a lot more put-together after her visit to the loo. No more hair chunks drenched in sweat.

Hermione did some quick mental arithmetic to determine how many sickles needed to be exchanged between which parties. The interaction done, they dug into the food.

Shandra nearly inhaled her food and quickly downed her drink. She wandered off to get another drink for her and John as the rest of them finished their food. Hermione drank hers quickly as well since the cold ice cream made her reach for her Butterbeer often to warm her back up. John decided that it would be a brilliant plan to give some of his food to Daryn at his booth and so they made the trek once Shandra returned.

Most of the crowd had found a place to sit and relax so they were relatively unimpeded as they wandered towards the booths lit by an eery green light that were set up along the opposite edge of the courtyard.

There was a small crowd around the booth when they arrived. It seemed they were admiring the record player that was displayed to play the band's singles. The people's faces were all lit by the green glow as they leaned over the device in fascination. The next band was just starting and had decided to start with a bang as well. The unexpected explosions made Hermione jump and have to swallow against a dry throat. As everyone moved forward to talk to Daryn, Hermione hung back to dig around in her bag.

She pulled out a vial but it was smashed out of her hand onto the ground. She looked up angrily to follow from the hand up to Malfoy's serious face.

"Malfoy, what the bloody hell?"

Malfoy vanished the vial and said gruffly, "Granger, don't be daft. You just had alcohol."

"Yeah, a Butterbeer. I hardly think that would cause much damage when combined with the potion. You didn't even know what it was!"

Malfoy raised an eyebrow. "Granger, you forget I've recently had to spend large amounts of time in your presence. Give me three guesses. None of them mix well with alcohol."

Hermione wasn't sure if her hands were still shaking from the episode or from anger. "You prat!" she growled.

"Hey! Hey, Hermione!" John called from the booth. Hermione turned from Malfoy and marched towards Daryn. Seeing Daryn in his costume pulled Hermione out of her anger for a little. Shandra was right. Daryn could pull off an afro.

"You look good in that, Daryn! Seems like you missed your true fashion time-period by a few decades," she said by way of greeting.

"Thanks, Hermione," Daryn said with a dry laugh. "You look nice. Who are you dressed as?"

"Bridget Wenlock."

"The Arithmancer? Excellent."

They all engaged in a pleasant conversation about the concert and how well everything had gone. Another group of fans began to crowd the booth and so Hermione and her friends relinquished the spot and wandered back towards their table.

If anything, it had gotten darker. Hermione shivered and flinched as someone dressed as a Dementor walked by. She instinctively grabbed for her vial… which Malfoy had already destroyed. She glared at the back of Malfoy's head.

"Actually, can I have a little of that Firewhiskey, John?" she said steelily.

John turned to her with a smile and offered his bottle. "Ready to have some fun?"

Hermione took a long swallow and tried to ignore the burn.

"Granger," Malfoy said warningly.

"Want to join us, Draco?" John took the bottle and tried to offer it to Malfoy. Malfoy blocked it with a hand and, instead, the liquid splashed onto his robe. Malfoy flinched like it had been hot and pulled out his wand to vanish it quickly.

"Aw, don't be such a spoilsport," John said and leaned his chin on Malfoy's shoulder. Malfoy twitched away from John's breath and made a face. He shoved John off and then pointed an accusing finger at all of them.

"I'm leaving. Don't you blighters do anything too stupid tonight." With that, Malfoy turned and left.

Hermione watched as he rushed through the crowds away from them. It didn't seem a particularly Malfoy thing to do. Or rather, she wasn't sure what had set him off. Nothing she could think of could make complete sense of what was going on. She sighed. Without comment, she grabbed the Firewhiskey bottle out of Shandra's hands, took a long gulp, and handed it back. Then she took off after Malfoy.

* * *

Sorry guys I lost track of what day it was. Also, a little of a cliffhanger. What do you guys think is going on?


	30. The Effects of Alcohol

She almost lost him, not having that bright blonde hair to help her pick him out of the crowd. She did see someone with dark hair slip into an alleyway and, possibly from something in the way he walked, she was almost sure it was Malfoy. She started to run, shoving her way between the masses of the laughing crowd, and almost tripped a few times. At the mouth of the alleyway, she stopped. The nearly pulsing darkness yielded too many creatures from her imagination.

As she stood at the edge, she heard a groan followed by a curse.

"Malfoy?" It had sounded like Malfoy.

"What the hell, Granger?" His voice echoed back towards her. Definitely Malfoy.

Hermione shot a blast of light down the alleyway. It lit up the corners and all of Hermione's searching only revealed Malfoy standing halfway down it with a hand raised to protect his eyes.

"Merlin's saggy pants, what are you bloody doing?"

"What are you doing, Malfoy?" Hermione asked, bumping the wall a few times as she scrambled quickly down the alley. Despite knowing nothing was in the shadows, the hairs on her neck pricked. With a whispered Sublustris, she lit her wand with a dusky red glow.

His hand shot up to block the sudden light and Hermione was distracted by something dark that covered his knuckles. She reached out to grab his hand.

"Is that blood? Did you punch someone?"

Malfoy hid his hand by crossing his arms and stepped back. "No, it's just my blood, Granger. I didn't hurt anyone."

"Just yourself," Hermione corrected.

Malfoy heaved a sigh. "What did you want? I made it clear I was leaving."

Hermione stepped closer. "I- I just- I don't know. You were acting weird."

When Hermione entered his personal space, Malfoy flinched away from her. "Granger, do me a favor and just leave."

Hermione stepped back, feeling her lip pout. "Why?"

"Haven't you guessed?"

"I thought we were almost friends?" Hermione asked and tried not to let the whine into her voice.

"No, Granger, not that." He sighed. "You guys all smell like alcohol. You're all swinging those bottles around as if it means nothing." He griped his arms tightly around himself as he turned his head again.

"But it means something to you?"

"It means too damn much," he whispered and his fingers dug deeper into his arms. "I said no pubs."

Hermione shook her head and said. "But, it's not like you're an alcoholic."

Malfoy looked up into her eyes. Everything about him was so dark except the red light reflected off of his eyes. "I am."

Hermione shook her head in disbelief. "But you never drink."

Malfoy shrugged. "The more technical term would be recovering alcoholic."

"Since when?"

"The alcoholic part? Probably started our sixth year. Maybe before that. The recovering part? A year or so after I moved to America."

Hermione leaned closer to ask another question, but Malfoy flinched away. "Merlin, your breath stinks."

Offended, Hermione covered her mouth.

"Don't you understand? I'm not strong." He rolled his eyes heavenward. "I'm so weak it can pull me in with just a taste." He looked down straight into her eyes. "Even if it's just on your breath."

Hermione's hand joined the other one over her mouth.

He slumped against the wall and pulled at his hair with his hands. "I should never have come. Tonight's going to be hell."

Hermione considered him for a moment and brightened. "Actually, I've got an idea." She pulled open her beaded purse. "Accio mouthwash." A little bottle zoomed out into her hand.

"Your idea is mouthwash?" Malfoy asked, his voice dry.

Hermione poured some of the mouthwash into the cap and half of it splashed down onto the ground. "Have a little faith, Malfoy. That's just step one. The next step includes the floo network." She knocked the cap back and made a face as she swished the stinging liquid around her mouth.

"The floo network," Malfoy repeated, his voice still very dry.

Hermione spat the liquid out and vanished it. "Yes, the floo network. I assumed you had heard of it, being a Wizard."

Malfoy rolled his eyes as she focused on screwing the cap back on.

"We'll take the network until we end up on the west coast and then we'll find a party that isn't focused on alcohol yet. Or maybe they'll have a museum that is still open!" Hermione grinned at the idea.

Malfoy winced. "Or maybe a haunted house."

Hermione started to agree and then realized what he had said. "No haunted anything," she said firmly, shaking her finger at him.

"Why?" Malfoy asked.

"Why? I want to shoot a curse at you whenever you pull out your wand! I'd cause an international incident at one of those!"

He raised an eyebrow. "I think that rushing around obliviating people will be an effective distraction for tonight."

Hermione fought down a giggle and put her hands on her hips, saying sternly, "We aren't doing that."

Malfoy raised his hands in a placating motion. "How will we even know which floos to take?"

Hermione Accio-ed a map from her bag. "I have a plan for that too," she told him with a grin. She went to open her map; however, she had a hard time juggling her wand, the map, and her mouthwash. She shoved her wand in her hair and Malfoy came to take the map from her. She went to put her mouthwash back into her bag and missed its small opening. She squinted and tried, successfully, again.

"Granger, how many drinks did you have?" His voice was just a touch cooler than it had been.

She felt unreasonable angry at the question. "What are you accusing me of, Malfoy?"

Malfoy sighed and rubbed his forehead with his freehand. "I'm accusing you of being drunk. How much did you have to drink?"

"You saw," she said petulantly, not looking him in the eye.

"A Butterbeer and less than a shot of whiskey from John?" Malfoy asked.

"And a little of Shandra's," she said. Then, at his skeptical look, she added defensively, "Not any more than from John's!"

He frowned at her for a moment before his eyebrows eased. "Let me guess: you didn't sleep well last night and you had at least one potion today."

Hermione folded her arms and pouted. "I never sleep well."

"So a yes on both accounts," Malfoy's voice had returned to being very dry. "Guess that explains how you got drunk so easily."

"I'm not drunk!"

He took a step towards her and she watched in confusion as his hand move towards her head. When she finally realized his intent, she reached up to stop him, but he grabbed her wand and had it in one of his pockets before her hand got to the top of her head.

"That's mine!" she said angrily, making a grab for it.

He stepped out of her reach and she nearly fell forward. He shoved her upright.

"Not drunk?" he repeated sarcastically. He grabbed her forearm and started leading her back down the alleyway. "Come on, Granger. I'll give you back your wand as soon as we get to your apartment."

"My apartment?" Hermione tugged at her arm. "I don't want to go!"

At the opening of the alley a group of people passed them, laughing and talking loudly about a party.

"Oh, a party! Come on, Malfoy!" She pulled him towards the group of people but he just dug his feet in.

She turned on him with a frown and then lunged for his pocket. He danced out of reach.

Hermione didn't bother trying to stop the giggle that escaped her this time. She secured her bag on her hip and then went after him in earnest. He side stepped her and she careened past, almost falling against the building.

She turned, pushing her be-spelled hair out of her face. "No fair! You can't use your seeker… thing."

"Seeker thing?" Malfoy asked, raising an eyebrow. He looked her up and down and then walked off into the crowd.

"Hey! Hey!" Hermione yelled. When there was no reply she muttered angrily to herself and followed after him. She thought she spotted the back of his dyed hair and jumped on his back. "Give me my wand!"

The man looked over his shoulder, a scar marring his forehead. "I can give you my wand!" He smiled widely.

"You aren't Malfoy! Or Harry!" She told him and looked up to see Malfoy farther into the crowd, his hand over his mouth, watching her. "Malfoy!" She pushed off of the not-Harry, and stomped her way towards the real-Malfoy. When she reached him, she put her hand out. "Wand."

"Not a chance." He turned and continued to walk away from her.

She grabbed his arm and attempted to hold him back. Instead, he just dragged her along behind him, her feet sliding along the cobblestone ground.

"Granger, it would be a lot easier if you just followed me," he said between breaths. "It's also going to be less embarrassing for you in the morning, I'm assuming."

She used one hand to smack his shoulder. "Mornings are stupid. I want to have fun tonight!"

Malfoy chuckled. "I'm not sure whether I want you to remember this or if I want to be able to tell you about it."

Hermione gave up on his arm and wrapped her arms around his shoulders with her hands pressing against his chest. "I'm not that drunk, Malfoy. I just have lots of ideas! Good ideas! Party ideas!"

"Hermione Granger, an idea person. I don't think anyone would have guessed." He continued walking a little ways with Hermione hanging off of him before he shook her off. She reached up to hang on him again, but he stepped out of the way, leaving Hermione to lose her balance. When she finally righted herself, Malfoy had moved on into the brighter lit area along the open shops. At least he was easier to find this way.

She snuck up behind him, pretending she was just one of the other people in the crowd. When she was only a few meters away, she broke into a clumsy run. Malfoy turned his head quickly and then started running himself. He easily outdistanced her and dived into a store, shutting the door after him.

When she caught up, he held the door as she tried to pull it open. Frustrated, she slammed her hand against the glass door. "Let me in, Malfoy!"

He stuck his thumbs in his ears and waggled his fingers. "Make me, Granger."

"I'm gonna tell Harry!" she scolded him. "He's gonna hate you more!"

Malfoy grinned and then covered his mouth as his shoulders shook a little.

"Hate you," Hermione repeated. "Like- like Ron hates me!" She grabbed her arms and bit her lip as a tear slid down her cheek. "They all hate me because I don't love Ron. Love, love Ron." The thought was distressing and so she collapsed onto the ground in front of the store. "I tried. I promise." She rocked back and forth as her eyes filled with tears. "I promise."

"Granger." Malfoy had come out of the store and held his hand out to her. She reached up to take it and he pulled her to her feet. "Come on."

She let him lead her into the store. "You believe me, right? I didn't want to hurt them."

He patted her hand. "I'm sure you have worked this out while sober, so just throw some floo powder into that fireplace would you, Granger?"

She looked at the fireplace in the café she had used to arrive at Wizarding New York. She turned and beat her fists against his chest. "You cheat! I'm not going!"

Malfoy stilled one of her fists and sighed. He used the other hand to grab some floo powder from one of his pockets and throw it into the fire as he called out her address. "Luna better be home," he muttered as the fire turned green.

The face of a pimply-faced young man appeared in the flames instead. "Granger-Lovegood residence."

"Who are you?" Malfoy asked, pushing Hermione's fists away from him again.

"The third wheel. What about you?"

"Er, Draco Malfoy."

"Do you have Hermione with you?"

Malfoy pushed Hermione into the area where her head would be visible.

"Good, hurry up and come through."

Malfoy grabbed Hermione's wrist and stepped into the floo, dragging her behind him. They were in her apartment before she even registered what had happened. "I said I didn't want to come home!" She started hitting his shoulder again.

"Hey, Granger! Stop hitting!" Malfoy said as he came out of the floo, his wand trained on the pimply-faced wizard that had answered the floo.

The wizard had his arms raised. "I said I'm the third wheel. That's it. Now I'm leaving." He threw some floo powder and escaped.

Malfoy turned to the sofa that was quickly becoming designated as Luna and Rolf's.

Rolf shrugged and Luna said, "We invited him to watch a Muggle movie. It just ended." The two were indeed lit by the glow of the TV playing the credits of a movie.

"I'm forcing Granger into bed," Malfoy said back. Then he slapped his forehead. "I mean- you know what, never mind. Come on, Granger."

Now that she was in her apartment, it didn't sound that bad. She yawned and let him push her towards the bedrooms. She wandered into hers and Malfoy stayed at the threshold.

"I'll hide your wand somewhere you can find when you are sober."

"Hmm." She reached out to take her sleeping potion. But before she had it open, it was being tugged out of her hands.

"And your sleeping potions," Malfoy added as he shoved all of the potions that she had piled by the side of her bed into his cloak pockets.

"Malfoy," she whined. "I need those to sleep."

He shook his head. "Alcohol has already done that trick tonight. Go to bed."

"I'm hungry."

"Go to bed, Granger."

She slumped onto her bed and looked up at his intent face. She thought about telling him how great pizza would be. Pizza was wonderful. However, before the words reached her mouth, she really did fall asleep.

* * *

A/N: So, are you guys surprised? Does this chapter seem realistic? What are your theories on Malfoy's past and what do you think Hermione's response will be?

Keep on keeping on, my friends. We've got this!

-Sam


	31. The Effects of Potions

Hermione woke up the next morning to a vague but deeply unsettled feeling and a headache that wouldn't let her fall asleep again. The headache was an insistent bead of light pulsing against her forehead and eyes that was just painful enough to ensure that it was hard to think about anything else. She reached for a potion to help ease it, but met an empty surface instead. She peeked her eyes open and the sight of her nightstand reaffirmed it. Gone. All her potions were gone. She grumbled and pushed herself up with the help of her arms. Had Luna taken them? Hermione had thought that they had come to an agreement (to not agree) when it came to her potions.

Pushing her blankets aside, Hermione made gentle progress towards the kitchen in hopes to find her potions, wherever Luna had hid them. She opened all of the cupboards above the sink and found no trace of them. She tried the cupboards on either side of the sink. No luck there either.

"Where else would she have bloody hidden them?" she mumbled to herself.

"Hidden what?"

Hermione jumped and whirled, making a grab for her wand. It wasn't there, and she grabbed the nearest kitchen utensil instead as she faced her intruder.

"Malfoy?" Hermione said in surprise.

"Nice spatula," he replied in reference to her weapon. His hair was a little tousled and he was still in the strange black outfit from last night that was a little too like a Death Eater's uniform. In his hand he twirled a wand. Her wand.

"How the hell did you get that?"

Malfoy grinned a thin smile. "Language, Granger."

"How the bloody hell did you get that and what in Merlin's grey beard are you doing in my kitchen?" she responded, spitting the words as angrily as she could without raising her voice.

"It would seem alcohol doesn't agree with you. Don't you remember anything from last night?"

"There is no way that I invited you to stay here, no matter how drunk I was," she said as she skirted around the table towards him. She made to grab her wand and he pulled his hand out of her reach.

"Manners, really, Granger," he said and smirked.

She rolled her eyes but the moment triggered a small memory. "Did you take my wand because I was drunk?" she asked with irritation, turning her palm out to him and raising an eyebrow.

He placed the wand into her hands. "Ten points to Gryffindor," he responded theatrically.

"And a hundred points from Slytherin for this whole stupid game. Where are my potions?"

"Do you always need them first thing in the morning?" he asked more seriously.

Hermione waved a dismissive hand after setting the spatula down again. "Depends on what type of night I've had."

"And how often do screaming nightmares play into them?" he asked, not looking at her, but twirling a chair out from underneath the table before sitting on it.

"Oh. The wards." She winced a little and turned her attention to the hallway. "Poor Luna," she said as she realized she hadn't reset the wards last night that muffled noises from her room.

"So, every night, then?" Malfoy said, his eyes boring straight into hers, a little frown on his face.

"Not quite that bad," Hermione hedged. "Now explain why you are here, because even if I did say to stay, you know sure as hell that you shouldn't have."

"Rolf invited me." Malfoy leaned backwards and pulled his hands behind his head.

"Rolf?" she asked incredulously.

"It's a rather long and boring story that is mostly or, really, all due to the fact that they wanted a… chaperone last night. Gave me time to study this map, though." He pulled her map of the floo network in the USA.

"Why do you still have that?" she asked.

"How long did this take you?"

Hermione shrugged. "A couple Saturdays."

He flipped the map open and glanced over its contents again. "Is there something after you, or is this just in case…"

She tugged at the map in his hands until he let go. "I think it's always good to be prepared," she snapped, trying to cover her embarrassment. "Now, where are my potions?"

"Are you familiar with addiction, Granger?"

"Mine or yours?" she said and then frowned at her own response. She had a vague memory of him saying he was an alcoholic. It had seemed real, but, now she had acknowledge it out loud, she wasn't sure if it was just a dream. She searched his face to determine his reaction.

He raised an eyebrow. "Remembered that, did you?"

"So that really happened?"

He nodded his head.

Hermione covered her mouth as she processed what that meant. He was an alcoholic? How had she responded last night? All she really remembered after that point was giggling for some reason. A lot. She tried not to groan as she wondered if she had giggled when he told her.

"Why did you tell me this when I was drunk?" she half-accused.

Malfoy rolled his eyes and pulled the salt shaker towards him. "I didn't realize it at the time," he replied, idly shaking some of the salt into his hand. "Didn't know you were such a light weight."

She pulled the shaker out of his hands and glared.

He raised his salt-free hand up defensively. "I didn't say it was a bad thing. Except, of course, your combination of potions and alcohol would fall under one of your dafter ideas."

Hermione acquiesced, not really able to come to her own defense. "How long?"

"Have I been an alcoholic? You already asked that question."

"Last night? I can't help it that I don't remember it!"

"Yeah, you can." He watched as he transferred the salt into his other hand.

She didn't reply, feeling attacked.

"You know the definition of addiction, don't you, Granger?"

"A compulsive need to take or do something even though it is harmful in some sense to you or others."

Malfoy glanced up from his hand and smirked. "Classic Granger. That was textbook."

Hermione tried not to be offended, it didn't seem like he was trying to be insulting.

"But, you've got to be smart enough to recognize that your potion use falls into that definition."

"Potions aren't damaging my life," Hermione countered, putting both hands on her hips as she towered over him. "I use them to make sure my other problems don't hurt my life."

His jaw clenched and then he looked away, both lips thinning down into a line. However, when he looked back at her, his face had cleared and he had an easy smirk on his face. He shrugged and said, "Of course, why should I care what you do with your life?"

Hermione sniffed and tilted her chin up. "Exactly." She reached up and took down a frying pan. "How do you like your eggs?"

He offered her the salt cupped in his palm with a small smirk. "I always take them with a little salt."

"If we use that, it's going in your eggs," was her reply.

…

They were eating eggs, toast and tea when Luna came out.

"Morning, Hermione. The therapist hasn't helped with any of your dreams about the War?"

Hermione started, and gulped down the tea she had started to swallow. She quickly set the cup down and pointed towards Malfoy while frantically shaking her head.

"No need to hide it, Granger. I was able to figure that out from the repeated interruptions of my sleep last night.

"Oh, hello, Draco. You're still here?" Luna said as she walked farther into the kitchen.

He shrugged. "Rolf left earlier this morning. Said something about Tikki-somethings?"

Hermione whipped her head around towards him. "Tiyanak?" She swung her head around to glare at Luna. "Again?"

"Rolf would have brought me along if it was truly worrisome, Hermione."

Hermione, who had actually begun to enjoy her morning, felt her headache increase from a distracting menace to a full pounding disaster. "Malfoy, where the hell did you put my potions?"

"Granger," he said, setting down his toast.

She held out her hand and wriggled her fingers impatiently. "Now. I'm done with this game." She felt a vial pushed into her hand and glanced at it. "All of them." Nothing happened and she scowled at him. "What, is this an intervention?" she asked sarcastically.

He sneered and pulled the rest of the potions from his coat pocket.

She pulled the cork quickly out of the first one and downed it without a second thought. She was rather surprised to see the sadness in Malfoy's eyes once she set the bottle down. That had just been a pain-potion. She still needed the others. She could understand Malfoy's worry. Potions could be dangerous when abused. He seemed to have plenty of experience with that one way or another. The potions really weren't hurting her. Well, a little, but the cost was worth it. She didn't have to explain that to anyone.

She downed half of one, tapped a few drops of another into her tea, and finished off the rest of another before she gave anyone else her attention again.

* * *

A/N: Sorry this is short it was a rather hard chapter to write. Stubborn Hermione makes me sad :/


	32. In which there are basketballs

Hermione swallowed a yawn as she met her stare in the mirror. Her eyes were bloodshot and her nose and cheeks were bright red. She had come out of the counseling office like this the past couple times and she was almost getting to the point where she didn't care if she was seen in this state. Almost. She still hid in the bathroom and waited for it to abate a little. Hermione didn't really like the fact that her and her counselor often talked about Ron in one sense or another. Couldn't she just be over it? How did things keep leading back to her relationship with him? She sighed and grabbed a few tissues as reserves before she left.

She spent the rest of her Saturday at a coffee shop alternating between tea and potions and planning her timetable for studying for finals. She tried to hold off on potions as much as possible, but it was more a habit than anything now. She often would grab a potion and already be drinking before she thought about whether she should or shouldn't do so. Hermione tried to not let the collection of empty bottles at the bottom of her bag bother her. It had been a very productive study session and she finally felt prepared for the next week. Why should it matter that she needed some help to do it? She felt justified in their use and the image of Malfoy's disappointed face shouldn't be haunting her like it was. Why should she care about his opinion, or anyone else's, for that matter? That's what had gotten her in the mess with Ron in the first place.

…

Hermione woke without the ring of the telephone that had served as her alarm clock over the past few Sunday mornings. Puzzled, Hermione turned the bedside clock so that she could see what time it was. Noon. Noon? That meant she had wasted half of the day sleeping when she could have been studying or cleaning or anything else, really. Though, she was a little relieved that she wouldn't have to talk with Ron in front of her other friends. However, that also meant that none of her friends were calling. What had stopped all of them from calling?

Hermione bolted up and searched the apartment for Luna but came up empty. She tried to call Harry but only got unending ringing. It was late afternoon for them, so they were probably out. Or fending off Dementors. Hermione listened to the annoying trill of the phone and muttered darkly to herself until she couldn't handle it anymore and slammed the phone down. She remembered waiting in the tent while Ron was gone and Harry was guarding. It had felt so empty. She felt the chill from those days shiver up her arms like goosebumps. They're fine! She told herself angrily, but the calm of the apartment was trying to swallow her. She hurriedly packed her bag and got out of the apartment as quickly as possible, returning to the café from the day before. She sat with her back against one of the walls and eventually ordered all three meals for that day from their menu. Hermione didn't even try to justify the bottles this time and downed them until she was in a comfortable haze. Even having a vague message on her message machine left by Ron about the missed phone call didn't raise her hackles like it would normally have without so many potions. It was really nice to have potions on hand when she needed them. They really could help almost anything but the yawning void that seemed to settle above her heart too often.

Going to school was a relief to the emptiness that was roaring in her ears by the end of the weekend and Hermione looked forward to being able to spend even more time out of the house on Friday when they were going to start the basketball club.

It turned out Hermione didn't really have to do much at the club but watch the kids while Shandra and Malfoy did most of the talking. Not that she minded. It was still nice to have all that business and noise around her. As well, Shandra joined Hermione on the sidelines a lot faster than Hermione had been expecting and helped fill the void. After the initial introduction, Shandra stepped back and allowed Malfoy to do most of the demonstrations. Hermione stopped watching what seemed like a good explanation of how to shoot a basketball once Shandra took a seat next to her on the ground.

"Aren't you supposed to be the expert on basketball?" Hermione asked, watching Malfoy execute another flawless shot. He didn't seemed to have dulled since he had last played Quidditch.

Shandra shrugged as she pulled her coat closer and tugged her gloves on again. "It's too cold to have my hands uncovered for too long. They'll get so dry." Shandra made a pouty face and rubbed her hands together.

Hermione nodded. The air was sharp with cold and accompanied by the heavy blue-gray clouds overhead. Once daylight saving time gave back her hour, things seemed to darken and cool quickly. Hermione involuntarily shuddered, she still had some horrible memories too closely associated with cold. Of being scared all the time. Of Ron. Hermione continued the conversation to try to cut off her own thoughts, "I didn't think Malfoy knew that much about basketball, though."

Shandra gave a short laugh. "He didn't. He forced me to drill him for hours over the weekend. He can now mostly throw correctly and has a basic understanding of the rules."

"Oh," Hermione replied, enlightened. "That would explain in part the good grades and grumpiness."

Shandra turned her head towards Hermione. "Hmm?"

"That Malfoy is a secret perfectionist."

Shandra looked to the side and thought for a moment before nodding. "Or just really prideful. He has to do something well or pretend to be totally disinterested."

Hermione leaned against the fence, which was cold and not exactly comfortable, and considered what Sandra had just said. It fit and made Malfoy more… human. More relatable. Not exactly what she wanted when watching him show off his physical prowess was forcing her to admit he could be very attractive when it was not overshadowed by his personality. Though his personality didn't seem as bad anymore… Disconcerted, Hermione stopped herself before she could think farther and changed the subject. "What do you think we'll do for the charm project?"

"Dragon pox would be easiest," Shandra said, turning to watch the kids again as they attempted to follow Malfoy's example. There was chaos as balls tumbled everywhere and kids chased after them.

Hermione thought about getting up but instead set up a charm that blocked the balls from rolling outside of the fenced area.

Shandra watched the balls and gave an approving nod. "Nifty."

"Thanks," Hermione said off-handedly. "It's the most researched magical disease, but it's pretty rare and boring at that since most charms don't work. Why not someone with a werewolf bite or a Fiendfyre burn victim?"

"You know, outside of the crazy chaos that happened in England, those things are nearly as rare as dragon pox," Shandra said dryly.

"Accidental werewolves rarely come out due to social stigma!" Hermione replied hotly. "My professor-"

"We wouldn't be able to find any research because of the stigma you just pointed out." Shandra rolled her eyes. "We could try to sell the magical burn idea, but really, Hermione, your ideas are just too academic and not pragmatic enough."

Hermione grunted unhappily but didn't try to argue. Not that she would have had a chance because Shandra jerked upright and shook her head.

"He isn't doing it right! That's not how you block." She pushed herself onto her feet and brushed off her gloves. "I'm off to hurt his manly pride as little as possible. Wish me luck." Shandra posed and then hustled along. "Draco, let me help you demonstrate that! It'll be good to have a defender and the offensive player at the same time!"

Hermione smiled and then tucked her feet closer to herself as she watched Shandra give Malfoy a run for his money. Malfoy was athletic and big but Shandra had plainly been playing competitive basketball for a while and had the upper hand. Hermione doubted the kids understood the subtle power play, but Hermione could see the annoyance in Malfoy's face as he lost his advantage. Once the court dissolved into chaos again after the demonstration a small chubby kid came and sat next to Hermione.

"Oh, hi, what's your name? Why aren't you playing?" she asked. He watched the other kids with a pout pulling at his lip.

The kid shrugged. "Everyone says I'm bad."

"Isn't that the point of a class?" Hermione asked gently. "To learn to get better?"

Again, the kid shrugged.

"Why don't you go learn?" Hermione asked, fighting the urge to push him back onto the court.

"I'm bad at everything."

Hermione frowned down at the kid. "Whoever told you that is a liar." After a pause she continued, "Anyone who says that probably hates themselves and wanted to make you feel bad as well. Don't let them."

The boy didn't say anything so Hermione stood up and then offered him her hand. He ignored it and stood up on his own but followed Hermione as she walked towards Malfoy.

Malfoy was shooting hoops for an adoring group of little girls and making every shot. However, he missed the one he took right as Hermione walked up to him.

"Malfoy."

"Granger," he acknowledged, stooping to pick up the ball as it rolled back to him. "Come to admire my 'seeker thing'?" He postured a little with the ball.

Momentarily derailed from her agenda, Hermione raised an eyebrow and asked with a small amount of contempt, "Seeker thing?" Was it some sort of innuendo she wasn't catching? "There aren't any snitches here, Malfoy."

He snorted and turned away from her to casually make another shot that made it into the hoop that time. "Seeker thing," he said as he turned back to her. "Your words. It's almost not as much fun when you don't even remember the things I'm mocking you for."

To her embarrassment, Hermione could feel her cheeks redden. "What, exactly, was I referring to?"

"Athleticism? Reflexes? General charm and good looks?" He raised both arms and pulled his eyebrows up at the same time. "Who am I to follow a drunk Granger's logic?"

The heat was reaching her ears now. "Malfoy, there are children present!" The reminder of children had her looking around for the kid who had been sitting next to her. He was still hanging back and trying to look disinterested by running his hands over a ball he had picked up. "I was not admiring your 'seeker thing.'" Hermione used the air quotes mockingly. "I wanted you to teach him-" Hermione gestured so Malfoy would know who she was speaking about "-how to shoot this ball."

Malfoy tilted his head. "I guess I can teach him part of my 'seeker thing.'"

Hermione rolled her eyes and tried not to blush more. "Will you stop that?"

He snorted and waved at the boy to come nearer.

Hermione started at the snort and watched what she thought was mirth twinkle in his eyes. Unsettled, she backed away. Now that she had transferred the responsibility of the boy to Malfoy, she walked briskly back to her spot against the fence without looking back.

She had wanted to smile back at him. When had she started to feel comradery with Malfoy? When had she started to think of him as a friend? She was awful at making friends. It generally took her a long time. Granted, she had known Malfoy for quite a while, but most of that time they had both spent hating the other. Maybe that was the trouble. It already felt like too many of her friends hated her. She couldn't see how Malfoy would be any different. In fact, it seemed like anger was his default mode.

She made it to the fence and leaned against it again, turning back to where Malfoy was still teaching the boy to shoot the basketball. The boy was clumsy and appeared to be a slow learner. Yet, Malfoy was still patiently correcting the boy's hand placement and arm positioning again and again. There was no benefit for Malfoy to treat this boy so well. No matter what Harry said, Malfoy had changed for the better. Maybe anger only used to be his default mode and that had been part of his apparent transformation to a more mature adult. Maybe that's why she was drawn to him now and their budding friendship wasn't just an ill-fated repeat of her previous friendship with Ron and her other friends.

The hope that that possibility coaxed from her was too painful to entertain and she turned to watch Shandra setting up a mock two on two game with Jordan and some other kids she had seen around the center. Malfoy must have forgotten to teach some of the rules, Hermione thought as she watched one of the kids hang off of Shandra's elbows, forcing her to make the shot single-handedly. Hermione tried to shake off thoughts of Malfoy and allow herself to just be caught up in watching the raucous game.

* * *

A/N: Hopefully a little lighter mood for this chapter? 


	33. In which there are spells (or not)

Hermione pressed her quill down against the paper, fingers clawing into the stem. He was about to give another assignment, she could tell by the buildup. There was already a project and a paper, she hadn't calculated any more time for this class! But, heedless of Hermione's building death glare, the professor continued with the inevitability of an avalanche. As the professor cast a spell for the assignment to be visible on the front wall, Hermione gripped her quill a little tighter and it snapped, splashing something against her face. Slowly, she looked down. Black ink was speckled across her parchment, hands, and desk. She glared at her soiled hands and looked around for something to wipe them off. Someone snorted and she snapped a glance towards her right where John was sitting.

"What?" she asked sharply.

John covered his mouth but he was still laughing. With his free hand he pointed at her face. "You look like a Dalmatian" –he snorted again- "and your face!" He gestured at his own and made an exaggerated shocked expression.

Hermione raised an eyebrow, too annoyed to try to grace his statement with a response. She raised her hand to wipe it on her sleeve when a voice from her other side stopped her.

"Granger, just put your hand out."

Hermione turned to him, her face turning into a suspicious frown out of habit.

Malfoy merely looked down his nose at her, eyes lazily half shut.

Hermione put her hand out, like a lady would for a gentleman to kiss.

He glanced down at it, smirked, and then slid his fingers along the outside of her wrist to the spot where no ink had gotten. Hermione's fingers twitched involuntarily at his touch.

"Tergeo." Her hand clean, he removed his fingers and beckoned for her other hand.

She held it out as well and he pressed his fingertips to the underside of her forearm, presumably to steady her arm.

"Tergeo." Her other hand was clean. "Honestly, Granger. Did you used to be such a klutz? Hold still, I'm going to spell your face."

Caught up in the insult and his lingering touch on her arm, Hermione didn't follow his words until his wand was out and pointed at her face. She froze as she stared down the wand tip. She could already feel her breathing picking up, her mouth drying out. She attempted to swallow and then had to attempt it again.

Malfoy saw her expression and lowered his wand. "Still?" He was almost sneering. "Just ask Joh-"

Hermione reached out and grabbed Malfoy's left hand with both of hers. "You just caught me off guard, Malfoy. I'm not a klutz. It was all the quill's fau-"

His hand squeezed hers back, his blocky rough fingers ghosting along the back of her hand. She looked down at their hands in surprise. She hadn't held a guy's hand in... Well, it had been awhile. The ending flick of Malfoy's wand caught her eye and she glanced up. Her hands went up to her face. Clean.

"Tergeo? You said 'Tergeo,' right, Malfoy?"

Malfoy rolled his eyes. "No, I Avada-ed you."

Hermione frowned and smacked his shoulder. "That's not funny."

"Just get your back-up or the back-up-quill to your back-up and copy down the assignment. Knowing you, if you don't, you're going to run me down and blame me in your shrill little voice."

Not quite shaking the memory of his hands on hers, she gave a little dignified sniff and turned away to follow his advice.

...

Hermione woke up with her face plastered against a book, drool sticking the page to her mouth. She grunted and pushed her upper body back into a sitting position. She gently pressed out her book page and whispered a gentle apology for mishandling it. Where was everyone? How long had she been asleep? It was dark in the single window in her study room, but that just meant it was sometime after 6pm, which she already knew. The school library didn't close until midnight, a feature she had been using the whole week, but usually there were a few people who stayed as late as she did. She didn't hear any noise except the distant sound of one set of steps along the tiled floor somewhere down the hall.

Her heart was starting to pound and work its way up her chest towards her mouth, making it hard to breathe. She started packing her things, quickly and quietly, but her shaking hands shoved one of her books off of the table and it hit the rug with a muffled bump. She froze, listening for a change in the footsteps. Were they quicker now? She tried to levitate the book instead. It felt incredibly heavy, like trying to move a house. She abandoned the book and poured the rest of them into her bag. She prayed that the shuffling of papers would be muffled by the bookshelves.

That done, she dragged her sweaty and still shaking hands along her robes. She couldn't hear the steps anymore but there was a faint roaring in her ears. Like someone was holding abandoned beach shells to them. Trying to keep her panting as quiet as possible, Hermione grabbed her book bag and inched towards the bookshelves. There was a small opening that she could slip through and hide behind the rows of books. She had scouted it out the first time she used this room. As she slipped through it, her bag bumped the shelf. She immediately dropped to the floor, spinning towards the opening. Everything spun, a little unfocused, and she frantically tried to discern if there was anyone in the room, any wands pointed towards her. Putting her left fist into her mouth she bit down, forcing her breathing to be as slow as she could manage through her nose. Calm. She needed to stay calm. When she could see clearly again, she started to set up wards, but her hands shook too much. She instead pressed herself into a corner, pointed her wand towards the entrance, and waited.

The odd swishing noise in her head had cleared but now she could hear the footsteps again. They were drawing nearer. Maybe they would just pass by. It was a small room, barely noticeable. Except the light. Hermione's breath hitched. She had left a candle burning. They were close enough to notice a snuffed candle. It was too late. The door creaked. She couldn't hear footsteps now. The carpet muffled them. There was a long shadow cast by the candle.

She watched as it loomed closer. Hermione bit her lip and clamped her teeth harder and harder until she felt sharp pain and tasted copper blood.

Something big and black slid from behind the bookshelf. Not trusting her wand technique, she threw a nonverbal. There was a grunt and then the man turned. Catching sight of her, he did a double-take.

"Miss? Are you alright?"

Hermione gulped and tried to shrink back against the shelves a little more. What did he mean, was she alright?

"Do you need to go to the hospital? Should I floo someone?" He stepped closer to her, completely blocking off the exit, and all her warning bells were screaming that she couldn't escape.

"St-stay back." Her words were hoarse, her mouth too dry. Underneath the panic, it was almost impossible to think. Still, worrying at her like an ignored itch, there was a thought. He hadn't attacked back.

He frowned and knelt down in front of her.

She scrambled onto her feet, pushing her wand out between them.

He stood slowly. "I'm the janitor," he said, starting to back up out of the bookshelf corner. "The library is closed. I saw the light."

Hermione's wand started to fall. "You're... the janitor?"

He nodded.

"The janitor." She looked him up and down. He did look familiar. In fact, he had already ousted her from the library at closing time before. He hadn't attacked. He wasn't attacking. It was okay.

Hermione's legs buckled and she slid down the back of the wall to sit on the floor again.

"The janitor!" she repeated, slightly hysteric. She let her head fall down until it was resting against her knee. She tucked her head even farther to shield the tears as they slid down and dripped from the tip of her nose. A noise escaped her: half giggle and half hitched-sob.

"Um... Miss. Hermione? Are you alright?"

She rubbed at her eyes with the back of her hand. "Oh, I'm fine, I'm fine!" She giggled again. "I'll just be going." Not meeting his eyes, he gathered up her book bag.

The janitor reached out a hand to help her up, and Hermione flinched. He removed it and she stood herself.

She hiked the bag onto her shoulder and followed him towards the door. He blew out the candle as they exited. In the hallway, he held up a book. "By chance, is this yours?"

It was the book she had left on the ground in her mad dash for her hiding place.

"Oh. Thank you." She took it from him.

"I'll just walk you to the floo network. Are you sure you don't need anything?"

Hermione smiled self-consciously. "I just accidentally fell asleep and woke up a bit disorientated."

"A bit?" the man said under his breath.

Hermione shrugged, not sure what else to say.

"Don't let school get the best of you. It's just the first semester. With the amount of studying you do here, you'll do fine."

Hermione bit her lip and tasted her blood again. She would have to fix that when she got home.

"Thank you, that is very kind."

At the fireplaces, he patted her shoulder and smiled. "Take care of yourself, Hermione."

She smiled and waved before taking the floo back to her own place.

Once she had downed a potion or two to help herself calm down, the exhaustion caught up with her again. Maybe if she could just rest on the couch for a little, she would be able to get everything done before really going to bed. Hermione slumped onto the love-seat couch that had more than a few frayed thread ends sticking out, but it also made it soft. Hermione rubbed her face against them, closing her eyes. The usually unwelcome lumps felt pretty comfortable right now. Hermione curled against the sofa and just let herself relax for a moment.

Someone was shaking her, calling her name.

"Luna?" Hermione mumbled.

"Hermione, you must have been really tired last night. You're letting too many of the Wacknerchels in your ears."

"Wackernels?" Hermione repeated around a yawn.

Luna stood and put her hands on her waist. "At school you got this way when you weren't around Harry and Ron enough."

"What?" Hermione grumbled.

"So serious. Never making time for the fun things."

Hermione sat up. "I enjoy studying," she answered defensively.

Luna shook her head and meandered towards the kitchen again. "Rolf and I are going to be studying Diriclaws over in Newfoundland during the weekend and then Rolf has invited me over to his parents' house for Thanksgiving. Would you like to come? Rolf said it would be okay."

Hermione rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. "His parents' house? Luna, that is a big deal and going to be awkward even without me being there."

"But aren't you going to be lonely?" Luna asked as she collected her things together to prepare to leave.

"I'll figure out something. Go to the parade or maybe just a Chinese restaurant."

Luna didn't press and they both continued to prepare for the rest of the day.

It was less than a week until they took a brief holiday for the American Thanksgiving. As such, school was mostly last minute cramming of information without really any practical application. Hermione was okay with that. Even with a little extra sleep, she didn't feel up to practicing spells all day.

Before going to the Young Wizard and Witch Club for basketball, their group had agreed to meet and plan out their Charm project. As everyone started to gather, Daryn gently pulled at her shoulder until they were facing away from the group.

He gave her a once over, his eyes stern. The skin under his own eyes looked bruised and heavily bagged and little vessels were starting to stand out in the whites of his eyes. "Hermione, are you doing alright?"

"You're one to talk!" she grumbled. "You've looked half-dead ever since the Halloween concert. Did you sell your soul for the music gig?"

Daryn shrugged and smiled sheepishly. "I just have had a hard time juggling everything. I think I'm getting better at it. You don't have that excuse, though." He gestured towards his eyes. "You're starting to look like how you did right before you had to go to the hospital."

Hermione's shoulders tightened. "It's just really stressful right before finals, it would be a wonder if I didn't look bad."

Daryn sighed and rubbed his temples. "I didn't mean it as an insult."

Hermione sniffed.

"Just, I'm worried. How are you managing your triggers?"

Hermione's hands tightened around her bag and then she tried to relax them. "I'm fine, Daryn. I'd rather just get this meeting over with so I can get started on this project."

Once everyone had gathered, Hermione quickly started the meeting off by polling the group for their project's topic. Shandra, Malfoy, and Daryn all agreed on Dragon Pox. John initially sided with her on magical burns but, when pressed, couldn't form a solid opinion.

Hermione grunted and tried to shake the annoyance of having to research Dragon Pox (again) away. "Fine, now we need to divvy up the workload. There are three research points, but the third one can be split up into two and-"

"-John and I will take the third. Shandra and Daryn can discuss who takes the first two."

Hermione paused and glared at Malfoy.

"You're just going to try to rewrite everything once we're finished anyway. You can look it over when we are done." Malfoy folded his arms and glanced around the group.

"You're right, man," John clapped the back of Malfoy's shoulder. "She does do that!"

The other two shrugged.

"You take the etiology section, Daryn," Shandra said, circling her own section. "It will probably be the shorter one." She looked up towards Malfoy and Hermione. "Will it be okay if I ditch tonight? I want to go see Daryn's concert."

Hermione and Malfoy looked at each other and Malfoy shrugged.

"Go ahead, we'll be fine." Hermione smiled encouragingly.

As Hermione and Malfoy headed towards the same floo, Malfoy said, "We both know I do all of the teaching anyway, just go home today."

Hermione's lip twitched. "Excuse you?"

Malfoy reached up and grabbed floo powder before looking back at her. "I said, 'go home.'" He stepped into the fireplace, smirked, and threw down the powder.

Hermione stepped in as he called out the destination. The green flames rushed around them and Hermione was pressed even closer against Malfoy as they arrived in the new, but smaller, destination.

"Granger-" Malfoy started as the fire died down.

Hermione flipped her hair out of her face and glared up at him, pushing her pointer finger against his chest. "-oh, don't 'Granger' me. Why am I suddenly the incompetent one? Do you know what I managed to do in my third year? What I did throughout all of seventh year?"

Malfoy knocked her hand aside. "No, I don't." He reached up to push his hair from his forehead. "I was just trying to be helpful," he said the last bit with a curled lip. "You look awful."

Hermione's eyes got bigger and she hissed as she leaned forward so her face was even closer to his. "Malfoy-"

Before Hermione said anything else, the receptionist called from her desk, "Do you two plan on fighting in there all day? You know we can still see you if you start making out."


	34. In which there is a cliffhanger

Malfoy's eyes traveled down to Hermione's lips, widened, and then jumped away. He coughed and his cheeks pinked ever so slightly.

Hermione stepped back so violently she hit her head against the brick wall. She pulled her head forward, reaching for the wounded spot, and ended up burying her face into his chest. She stilled and, before she could move again, Malfoy had reached out to cradle the back of her head with his own hand.

Hermione glanced up to meet his gaze, feeling his hand slide along her hair. She twitched as his hand pressed against hers. He removed his hand, frowned a little, and then stepped minutely away from her and gestured with his hand. "After you."

She bit her lip and turned away to exit the fireplace.

"The hell, Lori?" Malfoy said from behind her.

The receptionist, apparently named Lori, shrugged and smirked. "You were the ones hiding in the floo."

"And you're going to give them ideas," Malfoy growled, pointing towards the room where most of the children were. He paused and then took a double-take of the entrance where Ari was standing. He massaged his forehead with his fingertips. "Of course it would be you."

Ari looked between Hermione, who was still rubbing the back of her head, and the frowning Malfoy. "What ideas?" Ari asked. "That you were going off alone with Hermione like you did at the arcade?"

Lori's eyes got bigger and she looked between Malfoy and Hermione for their reactions.

Hermione snorted and a burst of hysterical laughter escaped her.

"Granger basically bites my head off every time we're alone. Besides, Ari, I'm not responsible for you right now."

"Bites?" Lori repeated, covering her mouth.

Malfoy swore and threw his hands into the air. "Just go to the basketball court, Ari."

Hermione hurried after him. "Don't swear in front of children," she called and then whispered once she caught up, "and I can't believe you implied I bite you!"

He ignored her and waved at all the children messing around in the room. "We'll have a short class since it's raining today. Anyone who still wants to come, grab your raincoat." Then, in a lower voice, he turned and said to Hermione, "I don't see why it matters. We both know there isn't any literal biting between us."

The rain ended up being too heavy for any reasonable person to be in it too long so Hermione and Malfoy set out to put a transfigured tarp over the top of the basketball court.

"What's taking so long?" Malfoy asked from where he was balancing the ladder.

"I can't see anything through this rain!" Hermione griped as she struggled to secure the tarp.

"Why aren't you using magic?"

Hermione started. She hadn't even thought of that. Magic. When had been the last time she had used magic? Right, it had been when she fumbled that 'Leviosa' spell. Maybe she had been unconsciously avoiding it since then. "We're in plain sight of muggles!" she yelled back, finally getting a good knot.

"What muggles?"

"Hold the ladder, I'm coming down." She climbed down the rungs. "While you might be lax with that kind of thing, I try not to throw spells in the presence of muggles."

Both of Malfoy's eyebrows went up and his voice was scathingly sarcastic. "Of course, how could I doubt this goody two-shoes?"

Hermione jerked and stepped away from him off of the bottom rung. It had been a while since his words had held that much bite.

He hefted the ladder up onto a shoulder and moved to the next corner.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Hermione yelled at him over the rain, jogging to his side.

"Hold the ladder." He started up the ladder without waiting.

Hermione clutched the ladder and glared at him as he worked the tarp down into place. When he came back down she blocked his path. "What is that supposed to mean?" She ground out slowly.

He sneered, turned, and picked up the ladder again.

"Malfoy!" She grabbed at his shoulder.

He spun, the ladder stopping just short of her head. "While you were in the bathroom, John accidentally knocked over your book bag."

She took a step back.

His cool grey eyes came up and pierced her.

She always kept a stash of potions in her book bag. "Who saw?"

"Everyone."

Hermione turned her head and closed her eyes. "That's why Daryn was so concerned."

"Shouldn't he be?" Malfoy's voice was still hard.

"It- it's just been a hard semester. I'll stop once break comes."

"And what will be your excuse then?" he whispered.

Her shoulders hunched up. "I will!"

He didn't say anything. Hermione stared at the raindrops rippling into the puddles on the court, their noise loud against her plastic hood.

"Are you guys done yet?" Lori called from the building

Hermione and Malfoy met each other's eyes and then silently finished the task.

They were still pointedly ignoring the other as the children poured out onto the court with their basketballs. There were a lot less than usual but they chattered happily. A group of mostly girls came up to him, pulling on Malfoy's clothes and begging him to play a game. He turned and plucked the basketball from one of them.

"Alright, alright. Me against all of you? Seems a bit one-sided… for me!" Malfoy said boisterously.

Hermione wasn't sure why it hurt so badly to see his back to her or why it looked so cold. So what if he thought she was overdosing on potions? However, just the thought stung her chest. She pressed her fist against the spot, trying to push the pain down and away. She did care. Why did she care? How had it come to this? For her to see Malfoy as a friend?

She roved along the edges of the playing children, their shouts nearly drowned out by the rain rattling against the tarp. She counted the children and scanned the borders for any strays.

Her wanderings led her back to where Malfoy was playing, and she resolutely continued straight past without changing her trajectory. A kid threw the basketball and it bounced off of someone's shoe and hurtled towards her. She threw up a hand and it ricocheted again off of her arm.

When she lowered it, one of the girls in pigtails was chasing after the basketball.

"What, no whipping out your wand today?" Malfoy asked her, his hands on his hips as he panted.

Hermione frowned at him. "Isn't that a good thing?"

His eyes hooded and he shrugged. "Depends." He turned away from her. "Alright, try to throw it back into court," he called to the little girl, hands wide.

Hermione shook her head and continued walking. That was the second time he had asked her about her magic. He didn't know about last night. Unless he had bribed the janitor? But why would-

-or he just knows the side effects of a potion overdose, another of her voices whispered. She checked behind her but he wasn't looking at her, still playing with the little girls. He couldn't have guessed, could he? Was that the reason for his sudden attitude reversal? She bit her lip. She shouldn't care.

Nonetheless, she did.

A few of the boys had left the court and were running through the rain towards one of the decrepit buildings close by. She watched them, not really seeing, and wondered what she should do. She was a goody two-shoes. There had never been any question about that. Yet, considering everything, did that make her a hypocrite too? The boys huddled under the fire escape, probably away from the rain. Their little rule-breaking a transgression so much less than all of hers. She turned away.

Hermione did another lap. She tried a nonverbal spell. Then another. Nothing. Would it be the same if she tried to use a wand? Was that empty feeling not just from being exhausted all the time? Maybe she really had lost her magic? Her hand clutched her wand. If only she could find somewhere private to check. She chanced another peek Malfoy's way to see if he was watching. He wasn't, but she saw something else.

The boys had somehow pulled the fire escape down and were climbing up it. They had already gotten to the third floor. If she told Malfoy, would that be as good as admitting she didn't think she could do magic? That she didn't trust herself to handle even this?

It felt like it.

All she had to do was talk the boys down. She didn't need Malfoy. It would be fine. She slipped out of the gate and started towards the building. The boys had seen her and were gesturing wildly. She sped up her walking. She hoped they would just come down, but, instead, they went up another level.

She started into a run. "Get down here!" she yelled as loudly as she could. Catching the railings, she hefted herself onto the stairs and started to run up. The steps were slippery and the metal icy underneath her hands. "Be careful, it's dangerous!"

She continued as fast as she could without falling, her eyes mostly on her feet. What was she going to do if one of those boys slipped on the stairs? Magic! Could she do magic? She pulled out her wand and concentrated.

"Lumos," she huffed between pants, still running as she cast the spell. Her wand lit up and reflected off of the puddles around her. She smiled, at least she had- The light sputtered.

"No, no, no!" The wand's light flared and then faded to an orange just like a dying light bulb. Fighting down the temptation to snap her wand in half, she shoved it back into her pocket. No magic then.

As she rounded yet another corner, she let the railing absorb her momentum. The second or third time, there was a horrible metal screech. The railing she had run into was listing, hanging from its welding spot. Broken? How could that have broken the railing? Then she noticed the window on that floor. It was a gaping hole surrounded by broken edges of glass. So it wasn't just a decrepit building. It was abandoned.

"Hey, you prats, I said stop!" All she could hear was the clattering of her own steps and so she wasn't sure where the boys were or if they had heard her. Her hands were too hot. Everything was too hot. She pulled off her raincoat as she climbed another set of stairs. Throwing it behind her, she balled her hands up into fists. When she got her hands on those ankle biters, they were going to wish they had never even thought of leaving the basketball court.

The rain that had mostly been blocked by her coat now hit her face like tiny needles. Irritated, she ducked her head to block them out. The cold spread down her neck, but that wasn't the worst of it. Now, she finally saw how high up she was. Both of her hands leapt out and clutched the railing.

"Shite, shite, shite," she hissed in time with her stairs. Don't let any of the steps break underneath me, she begged. They looked sturdy, but were they? She just needed to get to the top. How many flights was it now? It looked like fifty. She shut her eyes and just climbed. Lift leg, hit step, straighten leg. Again. Again. Lift leg-

"Miss Granger?"

She opened her eyes to see the boys watching her from over the top of the last flight of stairs.

"What were you idiots thinking?" she asked, her mind had become extremely white, buzzing with nothing but too loud to think. Her mouth moved fine, though. "Why did you think it would be a good idea to climb the fire escape of an abandoned building while it was raining?"

They were slowing backing up as she advanced. "Miss Granger, don't be mad. It was just a dare," one of the boys said. The other boys shushed him. It was the chubby boy from the previous Friday.

"Oh, so one of these blighters" –she gestured to the two other boys huddled against the wall of the building- "said 'let's climb rusty stairs while it's raining' and you cheered on his moronic plan?"

"Well, we didn't plan to come so high but then you followed us and everyone got scare-" the chubby boy started to say.

"-Shut up!" one of the other boys interrupted, and shoved the chubby kid. He stumbled along the metal and slammed into the railing. There was a crack but the railing held. However, the boy had fallen to his knees and one foot was caught in between the railings. The boy frantically wriggled his leg, trying to escape. As his movement became more panicked, one of the vertical handrails broke and fell towards the ground. She couldn't even hear the sound when it finally hit.

The boy whimpered. His foot had slipped with the handrail and now his leg was hanging over the drop. She was supposed to do something, but there was only whiteness. She needed a potion. How was she supposed to think without a potion? Still, she forced wooden steps towards the boy. "Come here."

The boy heaved on the railings to use that momentum to pull his leg up. Instead, one of the railings in his hands gave out too. Hermione slid on her knees and tried to grab at the boy. He clamped one hand around her neck and she finally found his jean belt loops. His weight slowly pulled her forward until she jammed one leg around the more stable corner railing.

"Go!" she yelled at the two boys. "Get Draco Malfoy!" The boys took off down the stairs.

The chubby boy's arms were shaking and he started sobbing in her ear.

"Hold on. Shite, just hold on."

She leaned back to try to leverage the boy up, even though it was twisting her knee in ways it wasn't meant to. Ignoring the messages from her knee, she reached out with her other leg to one of the railings. She tried to push off from it to help slide them both away from the ledge and to safety. Except, that railing broke as she pushed against it, and instead they slid a little closer to the edge.

The boy's arms strangled her as he shrieked in surprise.

Her head hurt. Her neck hurt. Her arms were fire.

Just a little longer.

Hermione tried to just breathe, thinking about getting the breath in and then back out. Through her breathing, there was a burning itch spreading across her shoulders. It was hard to ignore, especially once it was followed by a tiny popping feeling.

Just hold on.

Hold on.

Her arms didn't work properly, cramping into white pain. They were starting to ignore the messages she was willing towards them. The boy was still sobbing and they were ever so slowly sliding towards the edge.

Just let go.

No, no, she had to hold on. The drop would kill the boy. It was too far. Everything was blurring: her vision. Her thoughts. She had to do something now.

There was only one thing she could think of.

Hermione took in a huge breath, willing her lungs to expand as much as they could. She screwed her eyes shut tight and screamed, "DRACO!"

* * *

A/N: Surprise?

I had a little fun making the chapter title the almost literal reality. ;)

What do you think will happen next?


	35. Signum Vitalis (Reprise)

"Dammit, Granger. I already told you to let go! Just let go! I'm down here," Draco replied, his voice amplified by a 'Sonorus'.

Hermione opened her eyes. Her vision immediately tunneled to the drop below her and it made everything in her freeze. She forced her fuzzy vision to focus. He was there. Made small by distance, but unmistakably Draco.

Her hands were already slowing opening on their own and she wouldn't have a choice whether she responded to his command or not. She squeezed her eyes shut to focus and whispered in the boy's ear. "It's going to be okay. Draco is down there. He'll catch you."

The boy nodded against her neck.

"I'm going to swing you away from the railings. Let go when I say so."

Hermione hunched over towards the edge, her leg muscles convulsing as they tried to keep her balanced. "Now."

All of the boy's weight dropped into her arms and she threw as much weight as she could into pulling him away from her. The boy's face clipped the edge of the landing but he seemed to move just far enough to miss the subsequent railings. Hermione didn't have much time to see anymore because pushing the boy had thrown off her balance. She frantically clawed at the railings as she tried to get back onto the landing. One of the broken railings caught and tore her right forearm just before she finally gained enough purchase to push herself to a safe distance. The height was still dizzying even though she was balanced now. Her body's aches were now distant compared to the sheer terror of death staring up at her in the form of hard concrete.

Get away. Get away! Any movement could possibly throw off her already fragile balance, she was sure. She didn't trust any of her muscles. She gently lowered herself so her back was pressed against the metal landing, then she squirmed backwards, inching along with her shoulders and pushing with her feet against the corner railing. The second all of her extremities were on the landing she just lay limply.

Then the flashbacks started. The dark, dank underground vaults of Gringotts. The doors whipping by at impossible speed. Being thrown from the tracks in a small cart, everything soaked through from the Thief's Downfall. The dreadful, stomach-dropping seconds as they were hurled through the air until she pulled her wits together enough to concentrate on the spell. The awful twisting feeling as she fought Yaxley off during the disapparation and the surety of falling as she reapparated the second she had jinxed him off. She had been so sure she was going to fall from too high a spot when she had apparated them the second time, so relieved to be standing on the ground and then… Ron. His arm was covered in blood. More blood continued to wash his arm as it spurted from his shoulder. His groaning. His pain overwhelming her thoughts as Harry rushed through her bag. She could feel it in her own arm, the pain a dull heavy ache. There was rain too. Had it been raining? She could feel it faintly on her skin, numb with cold.

"Granger."

No. She didn't want to be pulled into that memory. Her arm already hurt so much. As much as she fought it, the spells flashed and blinded her eyes. Bellatrix's high pitched laughter and deeper tones of Lucius Malfoy. She didn't know. Hadn't known. To be tortured for something she didn't know. Ironic, but mostly just painful. She whimpered.

"Granger."

"I told you I don't know!" The words were almost ripped out of her in her frustration. Couldn't the pain just stop?

"Granger, you need to tell me if you are okay."

What? Who was it? She slit her eyes open to see them but was distracted by blood. Her arm was bleeding, mixing with the rain into a bloody glove over the parts of her hand she could see. There was a spot where the blood was beating out in time with her heartbeat. That was bad. Very bad, but was she still imagining things? It seemed so much like Ron's splinching… the pain too familiar to when that word had been dug into her. But that wasn't now, was it? Someone was calling her name. That someone was…

"Dr-draco?" she whispered. She tried to roll to her side to see him but that hurt her arm. She grimaced and threw her left arm over her face to protect it from the rain instead.

"If you don't say something more intelligent I'm going to assume you aren't able to."

"Oh, sod off." He was annoying her again. Everything annoyed her. Why couldn't it all stop? She wanted the pain to stop.

"I'm going to use a wand. Don't hex me." There was a pause and Hermione was sucked into the pain that swirled around her until Draco's voice pulled her from it. "Er… bloody hell. Does anything else hurt other than your arm?"

"Everything-" she had to stop to take a breath, "-idiot." It felt like pain was her world. It mostly came from her arm but anytime that ebbed it seemed to flood in from somewhere else.

"Bloody hell, Granger." His voice was starting to become raspy. "Sana Arteriae" She felt a twitch of magic in her arm but the pain remained. "Revela sanguinem." Pause "Revela ossa." Pause. "Well, that's good… I think."

There was a tearing noise and he wrapped something wet around her forearm. Afterwards he started gently probing her leg with a hand and Hermione could mostly ignore it until he got to her right thigh. She grunted, "Ow!"

Draco mumbled spells over her leg while she tried to breathe against the pain. Some time later, a hand slid between her shoulder blades and pushed her up to a sitting position. The world lurched underneath her and she jerked reflexively to stay upright. Somehow, between that moment and the next she was back on the ground.

"Signum Vitalis."

Hermione twitched and peeked one eye open.

Draco was kneeling next to her, wand poised in the air. "Merlin," he whispered. "Qualitas Anima." Pause. "Flare Corde." He moved to her knees and then pulled them up onto his shoulder so her feet dangled behind his head. "Well, Granger," his voice was oddly cheerful. "We're apparating to the Hospital."

She didn't have time to react before the awful pulling at her gut intensified everything that hurt. The arrival was no better and she turned her head, thinking she might be sick, but only a little bile burned up her throat. The lights were too bright and the noise too loud. She squeezed her eyes shut.

"-the bleeding. She might be going into shock. Her heart rate was-" Draco was talking to someone. Probably about her. She didn't give much thought to it as she spent most of her energy fighting off memories until they finally let her sleep.

…

Hermione had mostly recovered by nightfall but the staff had told her she would be going against medical advice if she returned home before the next morning. Really, she wanted a potion even more than her own bed, but they had refused her that as well. So, she spent a night at the hospital, being woken up every few hours for diagnostic spells. The sleep she did get was restless due to loud night-shift healers and alarms from other floors.

In the morning, she was sleep deprived and ready to escape through the window if they tried anything else. Instead, she got Draco.

He hovered at the threshold of the room, his arms folded.

"Dr- Malfoy, what are you doing here?"

"I'm here for your discharge."

"Did they tell you why they kept me for so long? Healing some cuts is a pretty simple fix," Hermione asked, gathering her things from the side table.

"Granger, I told them about the potions."

Hermione paused in putting one of her shoes. "What?" She turned her head towards him. "You did what?"

He shrugged and looked to the other side of the room.

"Why?"

Draco met her eyes before looking away again and starting to speak, "You shouldn't have had as altered mental status as you did. They needed to know what else was going on."

Hermione stomped her foot into her shoe to get her in heel in. "Who knows?"

"It doesn't matter."

She grabbed her wand from the side table and advanced on him. "Who knows, Malfoy?"

He leaned against the door frame and raised an eyebrow. "Oh, and now you're going to use magic? Should I worry about you puking slugs on me?"

Hermione's anger sputtered as she was reminded of the previous day. "Is he okay?"

"A small abrasion, but that's not the point."

Hermione grimaced. "What is the point?"

"You're going to an AA meeting."

Hermione twitched and then sneered into his face. "Oh, really?"

"Or I'm going to tell the Wizarding Club and the School," he said, face impassive, not moving an inch.

Hermione gritted her teeth and shoved a finger into Malfoy's chest. "What gives you that right?"

Malfoy pushed her hand away, and his jaw muscles twitched. "You either take care of your addiction or you're going to ruin your career before it starts."

She flinched.

"Do you think you could work around potions without being tempted to take a couple?" he continued, his body tense and his voice almost mocking.

"I wasn't plan-"

"Or what happens the next time you can't do magic?" he pressed, his voice raising.

Hermione bit her lip and looked down again.

"What's it going to take for you to stop, Granger? Once you hurt a patient? Or you've ruined your career? Are you willing to throw it away for a few measly potions?"

"I don't-" she started, but she didn't know how to finish the sentence.

His voice quieted down to almost a whisper, his eyes not leaving her face. "Come with me to an AA meeting. Just one."

She stared into his face. His eyes weren't full of hate. His lips were pressed tight together and his eyebrows were drawn up a little in worry. He was her friend. He was talking to her like a friend. She sighed and then nodded. She could do one of his meetings.

* * *

A/N: What do you think of the most recent developments? :)


	36. In which there is a turkey

Hermione didn't meet Draco's eyes on Monday and could barely meet the gaze of any of her group. What did they think of her? Had Draco said anything? Were they all remembering her overdose earlier that year? All of this stress made her itch for another potion. Only an hour until the next one. She could wait. She had planned out the time and place she could take her potion. As long as she spaced them out enough she would be okay.

And for the next few days she was okay. She kept to her tight regimen. She was beginning to feel the connection to her magic she hadn't even realized she had lost. If she kept this up, she would have enough magic to pass her classes. She would. Even if it meant white knuckling it the couple weeks left.

…

On Wednesday everyone was distracted and talking about the holidays while the Professors appeared oblivious to the change of atmosphere and continued to cram as much teaching into the day as wizardly possible. After the last class, the students seemed unable to get out of the room fast enough.

Daryn was tiredly packing up his own book bag. He probably was still trying to wake back up, Hermione thought. It had looked like he had fallen asleep in that last class. Or maybe he just liked having his head at near impossible angles during lectures. Hermione wasn't sure whether she wanted to start talking with him because she didn't want to have another chat about her triggers or potions or anything related to it. She still hadn't made up her mind when someone placed a hand on her shoulder.

She looked up to see Draco. Under his arm he had tucked an object, suspiciously book-shaped and wrapped in newspaper.

"Is it someone's birthday?" she asked.

Daryn looked up at the question and made eye contact with both of them. Draco gestured with his chin towards the door.

Daryn narrowed his eyes and Hermione frowned too.

"Malfoy, whatev-" she started.

"Just give us a moment, Daryn," Draco said, ignoring her.

Daryn looked between them and then at the hand Draco still had on her shoulder. "If you wish," was all Daryn said before leaving.

"Wha-" Hermioned started again.

Draco pulled out the book-like object and gently bopped her in the forehead with it. "Just take it, Granger."

Hermione frowned again but took the offending gift from his hands. "Is it a custom to give gifts during the American Thanksgiving?"

She started to rip open the newspaper but Draco's hand stopped her.

"Don't."

She furrowed her eyebrows.

Draco sighed and stared over her head. "It's the AA book." He rubbed the back of his neck. "You'll want to read the first chapter before the meeting."

Right. The meeting. She looked at book, imagining the cover underneath, and tried not to feel so negative about it. It would be good, she tried to convince herself. Books were good.

"You don't have to look so disgusted."

Her eyes widened. "I-"

"Do you have plans for Thanksgiving?"

Hermione pursed her lips. "Thanksgiving?"

"Yes, there is a meeting that night. With less people it might not be so… intimidating."

"No. I mean, yes. I mean - I can come. Where do you want to meet?" she finally finished.

Draco met her gaze again. "You're really not doing anything?"

"Luna is going to Rolf's and she did invite me but…" She trailed off and finished her sentence with a shrug.

He followed her shoulders with his eyes and nodded, swallowing visibly. "Samir is having something… that is if you'd… not that-"

"Samir. Who is he?"

He deflated a bit. "Oh, erm. He's… He's my sponsor."

"Oh." Hermione took a deep breath as she considered it. "Well, actually, that sounds nice. I've never had a traditional American Thanksgiving."

Draco chuckled. Hermione raised an eyebrow but he shook his head.

"I don't think it'll be traditional, whatever it is."

They started towards the floo.

"I could pick you up at your place," Draco offered, hands in his pockets.

Hermione hesitated.

"Or-"

"No." She decided. "No, you can come. It will be fine."

…

In an event unprecedented since very early in the semester, Luna and Hermione were sitting at the breakfast table together.

"Luna, what do you suppose people wear to American Thanksgivings?" Hermione asked, levering her poached eggs onto toast.

Luna looked up from her cold cereal. "Whatever they want to, don't you think?"

Hermione considered that, trying to sift out any more information from the obvious and failing. "What are you going to wear?" she asked.

"Dress robes. Rolf's family is rather… traditional."

"Pureblood traditional?" Hermione guessed before taking a bite.

Luna nodded.

When Hermione returned to find something suitable in her closet, something moving at knee level caught her eye. Before she registered what it was, she had her wand out and pointed. She blinked when she noticed the feathers. No, it couldn't be.

"Luna… is that a turkey?" she yelled from her room.

Luna came to the doorway and looked down at the creature. It gave a sound half-way between a honk and a screech.

"Oh, I had forgotten about him." She smiled down at it as it preceded to gobble at her. "Rolf gave him to me."

Hermione put away her wand and rubbed her temple. "Rolf gave you a live turkey? Why would he do something like that?"

Luna smiled and shrugged a little.

Not really sure what to do with a turkey in her bedroom, she ignored it and rifled through her closet. Draco had said not traditional. In the end Hermione decided on a dress with full skirts to hide her wand. She paired it with a cardigan like she would if she had been going to her parents' Christmas party. It seemed close enough. She tried to shoo the turkey out of her room and it started screeching at her.

Giving it up for a lost cause, she wandered into the living room and curled up with a book.

Later in the afternoon, Luna was on the opposite couch, scribbling on scrolls, when the floo was triggered. She peeked at it from her angle. "Oh, Draco, you are here early for a dinner date."

At Luna's voice. Hermione jumped up and worked the wards to allow him through. "It's not a dinner date," she hissed.

"Oh," Luna said, sounding disappointed.

As Draco stepped out of the fireplace, Hermione noted that he was dressed in a dress shirt and dark jeans. It looked nice, of course, but it was also what he wore to school nearly every day.

Hermione looked down at her dress. "I've overdressed, haven't I?" She turned towards her room. "Just give me a moment."

He reached out to her shoulder. "No, it's fine. You…" he stopped talking as he glanced over her shoulder. "Granger… is that a turkey?"

She chanced a look behind her. The turkey was strutting down their hallway. She closed her eyes briefly. "Yes. I don't know what Rolf was thinking, giving her that thing."

He returned his gaze from the turkey to her and then he frowned. "Rolf… that stuffy guy from the potions shop? She's going to his parents' for Thanksgiving?"

Hermione nodded.

"Oh."

"Oh?" she prompted.

"She's supposed to cook it."

Hermione's eyes widened and then she looked between the turkey and Luna. "She's supposed to what?"

That was how Hermione, Draco, and Luna ended up sitting around the kitchen table, darkly observing the turkey in the other room.

"Giving someone a live animal and then expecting them to kill and cook it is a courting tradition?" Hermione asked skeptically after Draco had explained it.

Draco shrugged. "It's old fashioned. Most wizards don't bother."

"Luna is just lucky," Hermione sighed.

"I think it's rather sweet," Luna offered, still watching the over-sized fowl.

"Mm," Hermione acknowledged and then addressed Draco. "Is she expected to kill it herself?"

Draco shook his head. "Usually house elves take care of that."

Hermione groaned.

"I-" Draco's face had twisted into something between disgust and pain. "I could do it."

Hermione saw his face and knew what he meant. He could kill it. She remembered Harry's account of the events on the Astronomy tower. When he had been commanded to kill. "No," she said immediately and almost sharply. "You won't."

He look relieved but then his face shut down again. "Well, you aren't doing it."

"On Monday Rolf and I were in Wizarding New York inspecting a restaurant," Luna announced. "They had a butcher shop."

There was a pause as Draco and Hermione shared a glance.

"Go to your party, you two." Luna bestowed them with a benevolent smile. "I am not a child and can do this myself."

Hermione's eyes widened as she realized that that had been exactly how she had been thinking. Luna seemed an eternal child; it made Hermione want to protect her. However, Luna had been through the war as well. She was not helpless, no matter appearances.

"Thank you for your advice, Draco. It will save embarrassment on all of us involved."

"You are welcome, Luna. Good luck with your courting."

Draco offered a hand to Hermione and, after staring at it for a bit, she put her hand in his. "It's close to the WiNY. We'll floo there and walk," he told her as she stood.

He hadn't let go of her hand and Hermione, unsure how to react, let him keep it in his fingers. They walked towards the floo, their elbows bumping as they navigated around the table. Hermione didn't know whether to look at their hands or pretend she hadn't noticed. Draco leaned down towards her, close enough that his cheek nudged some of her stray strands of hair. "Do you have the book?" he asked.

Book? Oh, the AA book, Hermione realized. She nodded, holding still as he stood straight again. She retrieved her charmed bag and he his jacket before they left.

They walked together from the floo at the Wizarding New York (WiNY) towards one of the exits. They were close enough that occasionally their arms would brush. Neither of them jumped or flinched but Hermione was hyper-aware of his breath that could occasionally rustle her hair, and how close their hands had come to touching a couple times. She swallowed and searched for something to say.

"You should take anything you need out of your bag now," Draco told her.

"Er- what?"

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Most Muggles do not react well to magical objects being flaunted in front of them."

"I'll just wait until we get there." She waved a hand to dismiss it.

The eyebrow moved higher and the side of his mouth went up with it. "Granger, Samir is a Muggle."

Hermione blinked a few times. "A Muggle? You mean, they'll all be Muggles?"

"No, they'll be horses," he said flatly.

She hit him on the shoulder. "Hilarious," she returned. "I was just surprised. I had assumed it would be a Wizard thing."

He nodded and his lips had gone down to a thin line.

"Wait, am I wearing something appropriate for an American Muggle household?" She held her arms out and studied her clothes anew.

He snorted but eyed her dress up and down. "You're really asking me?"

She glanced to him with a small frown.

He quirked an eyebrow and used both hands to point to himself. "Draco Malfoy?"

She thought about it and then broke into a grin. He grinned back and she couldn't help but laugh. It really would be ridiculous to think of asking the former Draco Malfoy about Muggle fashions. So, he could make fun of himself? That was… adorable.

"It wasn't that funny," Draco informed her, but he was still smiling a little.

She pictured trying to ask the past Draco about Muggles dresses and then giggled again, shaking her head.

His eyes jumped from one spot to another before looking at her again. "Speaking of which, I go by my first name there."

Hermione raised an eyebrow this time.

"At the meeting. Everybody does. Anonymity and all that." He reached up to rub his neck. "So, do you mind calling me Draco or me calling you… Hermione?"

* * *

A/N:

Is it actually happening? Something is happening??


	37. In which there is not a turkey

His voice hesitated just a little as he said her name. It was awkward, pausing overly long on the syllables. It was like that whenever she met someone new, but she shivered.

"No, I wouldn't mind, Draco."

He gulped and then his shoulders relaxed. "Good." He briefly regarded her and then swallowed again. "I mean… that's good. That you want to."

Once outside of WiNY, the wind whipped against them and through Hermione's cardigan. She pulled it a little closer. Why had he asked her that? Did it mean something beyond the stated obvious? Had he felt, like her, that their use of last names had become awkward? She bit her lip.

Draco looked back at her, observing her gnawed lip and shook his head.

"They are Muggles, Gr- I mean, Hermione." He said her voice in a quieter tone, like he was thinking about it. About her.

"They aren't going to recognize you or me or even Harry Potter. They would just say, who is this chap with the large forehead? Wait, he's just got an abnormally sized head. Oh, and what an ugly scar. Sorry gent, isn't he?"

Hermione giggled a little. "They would not. Harry has a perfectly normal sized head."

"I'm not sure if you should be a judge of that either, Hermione."

Distracted by her name, it took a couple seconds. "Hey!"

He grinned again.

"Oh, and you are a good judge, Mr. I-need-a-whole-separate-atmosphere-for-my-ego?"

He was still smiling but now it was quizzical. "Atmosphere?"

"It's the layers of air between us and space." She pointed above them.

He looked up at the sky darkened with clouds. "Huh. Good one."

They continued on, their conversation light and friendly. As they approached a set of apartment buildings, Draco held out a hand in front of her.

"Samir… he's going to be wearing a sword."

"A sword?" Hermione asked incredulously. "Why would he-"

"He's Sikh. He usually wears a small dagger but on special occasions he likes to wear his bigger one. It's one of the articles of his faith he is required to wear-"

"-yes. I know." Hermione interrupted.

He titled his head towards her and gave her a half smile. "Just don't hex him, Hermione, alright?"

Hermione straightened and nodded, giving him a weak smile. "I think I can manage that."

It turned out that they were both wearing swords: Samir and his wife, Harjeet. It was more obvious on Samir, who wore a blazer over a t-shirt, but Harjeet's sword was almost lost in the loose fabric of her top. Hermione might not have noticed it without Draco's warning and if it had not become her habit to scan people for threats.

After Draco has introduced them to Hermione, Harjeet turned a smile towards her. "It is so nice to meet you, Hermione," the woman told her in a faint British accent. "Draco has never brought a date before."

"Oh, erm," Hermione stumbled. "We're not-"

"Just friends," Draco supplied over her shoulder. "I'm still not dating anyone, Harjeet."

Harjeet turned a speculative eye between the two before leading them into her apartment. It was sparsely furnished but the pieces that were there were beautiful and well matched. Draco immediately was drawn towards the small television in the corner where Samir was adjusting the antenna for better reception.

"American football?" Hermione guessed.

Harjeet followed her gaze and then nodded with a smile. "My husband has converted Draco to the 'joys of American sport' as he calls it."

Just then, one of the players was buried beneath what seemed like the whole of both teams.

"Or maybe there's enough blood and violence to make the sport palatable," Hermione countered, thinking of all the Quidditch injuries she had seen over the years that never seemed to quell Harry or Ron's enthusiasm for the sport.

Harjeet's smile quirked a little. "It seems he will have to fight hard to make another convert of you."

Hermione shrugged. "Sorry, I've never liked watching people get hurt."

Harjeet patted her shoulder and led her to the table loaded with food. Most of it was in line with what Hermione knew of Thanksgiving: mashed potatoes, stuffing, pie and so on. However, there were also some not-so-thanksgiving dishes, such as the fried pastry Harjeet was pointing out.

"I made some samosa as an appetizer before dinner while we waited for everyone"

Hermione gratefully picked one up, not having eaten one since she had come to America. "Everyone?"

She was cut off by the door-bell.

"Excuse me." Harjeet gently placed her hand on Hermione's shoulder before going to open the door.

Three more people were at the doorway and, when they entered, the already small space felt cramped. She was introduced to them: Sam, Abby and Amar, she thought. Everyone started talking about things she didn't know about, their voices loud over the TV on which large men were still knocking each other over. Hermione half-listened but mostly focused on eating her samosa.

Then the doorbell rang again and two more people showed up, Bob and Jack or maybe Dick and Jacob. Hermione just knew there were too many people and not enough exits. It seemed every time she was at a large party the only thing she could think of was Fleur and Bill's wedding. It invaded into her thoughts even as she tried to reason her way out of it. These were Muggles... but, actually, that made it worse. She closed her eyes to breathe through the tension building in her. Almost immediately there was a hand on her shoulder. Her eyes shot open, but she was able to interrupt her hand before it got to her wand.

"Ma-Draco?" She had been expecting Harjeet.

He looked down at her with a small frown. "Out with it."

"I'm fine," she protested, trying to shrug off his hand as she studied the ground.

"Bullshit. What can I do? Do we need to leave?"

Hermione stared at him with surprised awe. "No, no. Just, during dinner, can I sit close to the door with my back to a wall?"

He gave her a single nod before heading over to Harjeet. He whispered in her ear and Harjeet only glanced at Hermione once before nodding and saying something in reply. When Draco returned to Hermione, he directed her towards the seats that fit with her specifications. She was about to protest sitting before being invited when Samir did just that. Draco shoved her down in the chair and then took the one next to her.

"You better be treating your lady nicely, Draco," said the man, the black-skinned one that was either Dick or Jacob.

"I am a perfect gentleman," Draco countered from her other side.

Hermione snorted and both looked at her. "Actually, he is," she hurried to reassure the man. "Not perfect but he is a gentleman, most of the time. He just used to not be at all-"

"Please stop talking Hermione before you destroy any of my reputation that I still have left," Draco said in a slightly strangled voice.

Before anyone could reply, Samir cleared his throat from the front of the table. Once everyone was quiet and looking towards him, he began. "The dear Lord Vaheguru is the Sole Provider for the whole creation. There is no limit to His giving…"

Hermione peeked towards Draco to see his head slightly bowed, his mouth sometimes forming the words. She turned to watch Samir again, his deep voice rumbling over the scripture. "…O Dear Almighty God may Your Name be exalted through Guru Nanak. May all prosper according to Your will."

She listened to the words and thought it an appropriate prayer for a holiday of thanksgiving, despite the foreign terms and names. Everyone was still quiet afterwards, their eyes slowly coming up, but, at a gesture from Samir, everyone began reaching for plates and dishes.

It turned out that the man next to her was named Jacob and the other man that had come with him was his sponsee, Robert. Both of them were business men who had alienated their families to the point that they lived permanently in the city and had nowhere to go for Thanksgiving. Sam's home life wasn't conducive to staying sober and his girlfriend, Abby, had no family on this side of the States. Amar was a young relative of Samir and Harjeet's that had traveled from India recently to help with the family restaurant.

Harjeet did not eat meat and so the turkey had been replaced by a vegetarian cottage pie, which Hermione had mistakenly assumed was a fruit pie.

Overall, once Hermione understood who was who and a bit of their backgrounds, the conversations started to make sense. However, once the conversation turned to her, she wasn't sure what to say.

"She's an old friend," Draco said. At her eye roll, he amended, "Fine, I used to bully her and now we're friends."

There was a murmur of voices.

"I didn't know you were on your 9th step!"

"That's forgiving of you, coming to a meeting and everything. That's why you are here, right?"

"Was he as surly in grade school?"

"No, no to all of that," Draco interrupted. "We ran into each other accidentally at my school. That's it."

"The medical school you are going to? That's quite a coincidence!" Abby said, peeking at both of them from underneath her dark bangs.

Hermione shrugged and said weakly, "It's rather famous in our parts?"

No one seemed inclined to question further than that and the conversation continued through dinner and the actual fruit pies that had been hidden in the kitchen. As the pie was finished and the time for the meeting was approaching, there was talk of bringing pie as the treat for that meeting instead of the usual doughnuts.

"I've already shared Harjeet's pie with all of you punks, I'm not going to share it anymore," Samir said as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

That was met with general laughter. However, as it turned out, Harjeet's pies had never been in danger as she had a store-bought one on hand 'just-in-case.'

"That's Harjeet for you," Jacob said as she left for the kitchen. "Always saving all our butts."

There was a chorus of agreement and everyone started clearing plates and preparing to leave.

Everyone except Amar had planned to go to the AA meeting. Amar mentioned he was needed back at the restaurant and left before everyone else. By the time the rest of them had left the apartment, it was well and truly night and the chill that Hermione could ignore earlier had settled into something that went straight through her cardigan and made her teeth chatter. Draco pulled off his jacket and made to drape it around her shoulders.

Hermione tried to wave him off. "Give me a moment to cast a spell. I'll be fine," she whispered.

"It's going to look very suspicious that way and besides, you've already had my manners questioned once today," he whispered back pointedly, their faces close as he readjusted the jacket to be behind her again.

She made a face and angled her arms so they slid into its sleeves. She pulled the jacket and his warmth around her. "You are a gentleman, Draco." She continued to speak quietly. "Even if you are still rather rough around the edges."

His eyes widened and he swallowed visibly. "Er, Hermione…"

She stepped closer to him as an idea occurred to her and Draco twitched as if he wanted to back up but didn't.

"Just shield me for a second while I cast a spell on you, then," she said. She slipped her right arm out of its sleeve and pulled out her wand under the protection of the jacket Malfoy held tented from her to his chest. With a quick hand gesture and muttered word the spell was done and then everything was set to rights.

"Come on, lovebirds!" someone called, Hermione thought it might have been Sam.

"Sod off!" Draco yelled back as she tucked her head in embarrassment. He reached out for her hand and squeezed it. "Those prats just like teasing me."

The AA meeting was held in a red brick church with stately pillars surrounding its entrance.

Beyond the group that they arrived with, there was a handful of others settling into the hard-backed chairs. The newcomers were mostly older than their group, some well-groomed but others with scruffy hair and ill-fitting clothing.

When the time came for the meeting to begin, Hermione wasn't surprised to see Samir standing at the front.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. This is the regular meeting of the New York Inter-group of Alcoholics Anonymous. My name is Samir and I am an alcoholic and your secretary. Let us open the meeting with a moment of silence to do with as you wish followed by the Serenity Prayer."

The moment observed, Samir continued, "And now, the prayer."

Most of the group joined Samir as he began. "God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference."

Samir continued to introduce the meeting with an emphasis on needing only the desire to stop drinking and that it is working the steps that is essential to recovery. After that, Harjeet read the 12 steps from her AA book and then continued to read what sounded like a summarization of the first few chapters Hermione had managed to read from the book: "We were alcoholics and could not manage our own lives. No human power could have relieved our alcoholism but God could and would if sought. Any life run on self-will can hardly be a success."

As Harjeet read on, Hermione felt herself becoming stiffer and stiffer. She had survived her whole Hogwarts career and the war through self-will and her own magic. What did they call all her late nights in the library? The chilly woods night-watch using her will to ward off the Horcrux necklace's pull on her mind?

Samir's voice cut through her darkening thoughts. "We have one new member. Hermione, would you introduce yourself?"

Hermione stood stiffly and gave everyone a small wave towards the group. "I'm Hermione Gr- I'm Hermione."

There was a chorus of "Hi, Hermione," from the attendees.

"I'm from Britain." She trailed off and saw Draco raise both eyebrows.

"Just say it," he mouthed.

"And… I might be an addict." She finished before quickly sitting down.

"Might?" he asked sarcastically.

Hermione pulled her shoulders back. "Might," she returned.

"Thank you, Hermione. Since we are small enough today, we'll do a discussion meeting with the focus on the first three steps. I'll ask you to limit your share to under five minutes."

* * *

A/N: I've tried my best to accurately depict Sikhism but if there is anything you want to educate me on I would appreciate it.


	38. In which there are revelations

With the chairs pulled into a semi-circle of sorts, it almost felt like one of her upper-level classes where they had mostly discussed the material rather than listening to a lecture. However, Hermione had never felt so unprepared for a discussion in her life. True, she had read the material, but that was all. She had barely finished reading it in time and had had no desire to think about it in relationship to herself. She was very glad she wasn't expected to participate in this discussion.

For the most part, these people looked like those that she would meet on the street. A middle-aged woman in her out-dated clothing and chunky jewelry. A barely-old-enough-to-legally-drink young man in his leather jacket, combat boots and pimpled-face. Several of the people were wrapped in ratty blankets, looking like they were on hard times because of their low quality clothes and poor hygiene. She possibly could have been alienated by that before, but she had been a fugitive and had looked like them at one point. Mostly it reminded her of how she had felt during that time. Lost. Terrified. Hunted. She checked over her shoulder, counting the exits, before scanning the faces of the people around her again.

Draco reached over and squeezed her hand. She turned to him, knowing she wasn't completely hiding her discomfort.

"I've been here for almost a year. They are okay," he whispered.

Hermione took in a shuddering breath and nodded. After she had forced a few deep inhales and exhales, he released her hand.

Draco was designated as the first to speak and stood up. He had pulled on the persona he used with their classmates, especially initially; a little detached but still exuding charisma. "My name is Draco." There was a chorus of greetings. "Most of you have heard my story," he said with a side glance towards Hermione. "The short of it is I made a lot of bad decisions when I was younger and then had to deal with the fallout of those choices.

"I used alcohol to deal with that and then, because of my addiction, I got in trouble with the law. Samir" –Draco exchanged a nod with said man- "agreed to bail me out only if I agreed to start coming to the meetings."

Hermione wondered if they had known each other before that. Either way, she couldn't imagine the old Draco interacting with Samir in any way that would make the man want to bail Draco out.

"There I saw people who had been where I was and had somehow found happiness. I decided to work the steps." He briefly looked towards Hermione before continuing.

"I can tell you that the promises made in this book have happened in my life. I was at a point of no hope when I reached out to my higher power" -Draco tried to clear his throat but his voice remained hoarse- "and he helped me out of the darkness. This works as long as you work it." He ended with a nod and sat down.

Hermione blinked. Higher power? He had never mentioned religion before. Who or what was his higher power? She tried to read his face as there was a chorus of 'thank you' from the others. Their eyes met briefly before she smiled and turned away to the next speaker. It had been pretty obvious that that had been at least partially directed towards her. She didn't like the feeling of being preached at, but she couldn't tell if he had done it on purpose. Heaven knew he probably didn't have much experience helping out a friend like this (or at least she hoped not.) She wasn't sure what he wanted her to know, though. Really, it just made her want to ask him more questions.

Through the other shares, there were similar stories to Draco's. Jacob had a grandchild he had never seen. Another man told his story of reconciliation with his wife and the happy Thanksgiving he had shared with her. Some of the shares were very preachy and Hermione almost felt like she was listening to a sermon, but mostly people spoke of how their God had given them the hope and strength to overcome their addiction. It almost felt like being in church or talking to Luna; many of them were very frank. She was torn between hanging on their every word and cutting herself off from it all. It was too real. Too personal. Too relatable.

By the end, Hermione had decided on emotional distance. She only half listened to the last few speakers and held herself stiffly as everyone stood up after the meeting. There were too many people. She was grateful they had sat towards the front so she could quickly turn and face most of the crowd. One of the well-groomed older gentleman approached Draco and began speaking with him. While Draco didn't seem particularly interested in the conversation, he wasn't being outright rude to him either.

She hung beside Draco, eyeing the exits and those who moved too closely to them. While it had certainly been an interesting experience, she was very ready to leave.

"... and this wonderful young lady," the old man said before stepping towards her with his hands outreached.

Taken by surprise, Hermione didn't quite repress the reflexive flinch. She took a step slightly behind Draco and reached out her hand. "Hello," she muttered.

He tilted his head and then smiled, shaking her hand back. "Yes, very nice to meet you."

Draco tilted his head to look over his shoulder at her and frowned. "Er, it seems we need to leave soon," he told the man.

"Of course, of course." The man amiably moved to another group.

"Are you alright?" Draco asked.

She shrugged. How could she explain that all the stories had made her feel raw and she hadn't pulled on her usual defenses yet? How each time she remembered something, it pulled down what she had started to build up? It made her feel weak.

He flicked his narrowed eyes towards the retreating man's back. "Well, let's go talk to Samir and Harjeet at least." Draco offered his hand and she took it again. It was a small comfort, at least.

When they found the couple, Samir gloated to Hermione about how far Draco had come (she wasn't surprised) and Harjeet warmly told her to come back again.

Hermione did her best to sound friendly without actually committing to anything.

Draco and Hermione walked back to WiNY, both comforted by warming charms unlike the previous time.

At the shop with the floos, Draco paused at the door. "Erm, Happy Thanksgiving, Hermione.

She nodded. "I had a good time. Thanks for introducing me to Samir and his wife." She didn't feel like returning to her apartment yet, so she turned to walk further into WiNY. She heard Draco follow her.

"Not going back to your apartment?" he asked.

Hermione shook her head. "I need to mentally prepare before I face an empty flat." She saw that the Tuneful Brew was still open. It was actually the only shop other than the pub that was still open. "Fancy a cuppa?"

Draco agreed and they found a little corner of the shop where Hermione could sit with her back to the wall. As they waited for their tea to cool, Hermione fidgeted with the stick that held the tea bag suspended.

Finally, she asked, "Draco, what happened when you came to the Americas?"

His eyes slid back from the window and he scowled. "Nothing very interesting. I did stupid stuff and now I don't."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Yes, but you are very different now. There must have been something that changed your mind about… everything."

He shrugged and stirred his tea. "It was actually rather gradual. I mean, the war really did shake me up. You can't…" He rubbed his hair distractedly. "You saw it."

She nodded. The war had destroyed a lot of delusions about the people around her and the world in general. It was not surprising it had been the same for him.

"My mother had a hard time getting back on her feet. I never had been on my feet. And then… someone I knew tried to kill herself."

Hermione went through the short list of his female acquaintances she was aware of. It didn't seem like it was his mother so… "Pansy?" From his face, she could tell that she had been correct. "I hadn't realized…"

"It doesn't matter," he said gruffly. "And don't go spreading that around."

"Of course not," Hermione replied, a little offended.

"By that time I had found the joys of alcohol and so I just indulged a little more than usual. It was a nice way not to think about anything." His voice was tight with sarcasm. "After finding me passed out on the stairs a couple times my mother tried to get me to 'do something productive with my life.'" He used air quotes. "I said I would go to the Salem Healers' School. I figured it would please her because it's the most prestigious Healers' school and it'd get me away."

She nodded. "That's why I chose the school as well."

Draco looked up and laughed darkly. "Well, I didn't actually go. I just got drunk in a different place."

"But that's when Samir came in," Hermione guessed.

He nodded. "His restaurant was near my apartment and I always got hungry passing there so I would go in."

"Drunk?"

Draco chuckled with little amusement. "Samir would take me to one of the tables outside. I guess they welcomed any customers about then." At Hermione's questioning look he added, "It was right after September 11th. They had their front window smashed in a few times. I think seeing the senseless hate against them was one of the things that really made me actively rethink my own prejudices. I mean, even if purebloods are superior-"

"Excuse you?" Hermione asked, her voice raising.

This time Draco really laughed. "You are still easy to rile up."

Hermione frowned and folded her arms.

"I'm saying that even if they are superior why did they need to hurt those who were inferior? Isn't it usually those that don't have a solid leg to stand on who resort to violence?"

Hermione tipped her head, mollified for the time being. "Has Samir had any problems since then?"

"No, not since I took care of it." Draco smirked and gestured with his hand as if casting a spell.

Hermione gasped a little. "You didn't."

He snickered. "Just some protective charms, no assault, really, Hermione."

He went on to tell her about getting really drunk and getting arrested and having no one else to bail him out except Samir. As he sat in on the AA meetings and heard about others' stories, he realized how much he was hurting his mother and also that maybe he could actually come back from the hole he fell into called alcoholism. When Ari's father had contacted him, Draco was a functioning alcoholic and sometimes helped at Samir's restaurant.

"Why were you helping at the restaurant?" Hermione interrupted his story.

Draco pointed at his head. "Samir's turban. People assumed he was Muslim. It was easier to have someone serve who didn't wear one and Harjeet was already the hostess."

Hermione nodded and then tried to picture Draco in a waiter's apron. It probably looked good. She blinked and chastised herself for thinking of that sort of thing. "Ari's father let you take care of his son even though you were a drunk?" she asked.

Draco shook his head. "No one knew except mother. It's not exactly something you advertise. It was then that I realized that if I wanted to help Ari I would have to be sober. Completely sober."

"You really care about Ari, don't you?"

Draco sipped his tea and kept his eyes on the liquid once he set it down. "He started his life like I did. I knew that if he was to avoid a life like mine he would need some outside help. That's what finally got me to commit to sobriety." He turned his grey eyes on her. "I've been sober the whole time I've been responsible for Ari."

Hermione nodded. "I believe you." She reached out and touched his fingers in reassurance. Something sparked between the tips of her fingers and the backs of his. She quickly withdrew her hand.

His eyes tracked each movement of her hand before turning back to her. She looked away, embarrassed, to see the pointed looks the barista was giving them and the clock. The last of her tea had become stone cold but she knocked it back anyway.

"We should go," Hermione said, nodding towards the clock. They put their glasses in the waiting tray before walking outside towards the shop with the floo network. Hermione cast a warming spell before they left the Tuneful Brew.

He fidgeted during the walk, shoving his hands into his pockets and then pulling them back out, tugging at his collar and then unbuttoning the top. Hermione observed all this and tried to think of something to say to relieve his anxiety, but after hours of talking she was having a hard time finding a topic. Right before they entered the shop, Draco stuck his hand out in front of her.

"Wait, I need to say this now."

Hermione looked up, biting her lip as she wondered what he could possibly be so worried about.

He watched her lip and pulled his own bottom lip under his teeth for a second before shaking his head. He grabbed her hand and pulled her down the alley just a little more. She was conscious of the not unpleasantness of his firm grip of his hand but also of all her warning bells going off. He turned, let go of her hand, and placed his hand beside her head, nearly trapping her in with his body. Hermione's heart rate spiked and her breathing was getting faster.

"Draco, this-" she started, swallowing heavily. She was scared but she couldn't decide if it was because she felt in danger or if it was just his closeness. "You're-"

"I need to say this before I lose my nerve," he interrupted her, his voice gravelly. He was looking down at her with an intent fierceness. "I think this is right."

Since Hermione had no idea what he was talking about, she stayed frozen, focusing on her breathing and not panicking.

"You know Step 9."

Hermione shook her head but felt herself relax a little. So it was about AA. He shifted and she pulled her gaze from his open shirt collar back to his face.

"It's where we make amends with people we have wronged," he told her hoarsely.

Hermione, realizing where this was going, felt her eyes widen.

"I've said this before, but I was a downright prat. Worse than that. I let awful things happen to you." His eyes tracked down to her forearm and she flinched a little, unconsciously. His free hand moved a little towards her arm before stopping himself. He looked back up and his mouth was pulled into a grimace. "I was incredibly selfish and a coward. I don't know how- I'm sorry, Hermione. I've thought about how I could possibly make amends." He closed his eyes and shook his head a little.

"Draco," she started, her hand starting to reach for his shoulder. "You were in an imposs-"

"Don't," he said harshly, his eyes still closed.

She stopped, her hand dropping to her side.

"Don't make excuses for me." He opened his eyes but still stared at the ground. "I've thought a lot about how I could make amends. I've tried to make amends."

Hermione remembered all those moments that he had seemed uncharacteristically nice or at least helpful. She had just gotten used to it, thought it had been part of the new Draco. Could it be that he had just been trying to complete one of his steps? Was she a project to him? Suddenly, the gravitation she had been feeling towards him cooled.

Still, he really had been trying. It was an amazing change. She reached out with a finger and tipped his head up to look at hers. The tumult in his eyes was still gut-wrenching. She cared about him, she realized. Probably too much. She quickly removed her hand.

"I've already accepted your apology, Draco. Now, I've forgiven you as well." Beyond forgiven him, that little part of her mind said. Ignoring it, she continued, "You've become an impressive gentleman but you can stop now. You don't have to make amends anymore."

Draco's eyes widened and his posture straightened a little. "Hermione," he whispered.

She suppressed the shudder.

He leaned down towards her and Hermione's mind was shouting danger, but still not sure which kind. His eyes caught on her right arm and his hand followed, just grazing the spot where her scar was. This time she couldn't help the flinch or the gasp.

His mouth immediately went tight, his eyes hooded. He sighed before glancing up, his look a little less warm. "Of course, big-hearted Hermione," his said in an off-handed tone. "You always did have a soft-spot for the screw-ups."

Hermione wasn't sure what he was referring to, but it felt like a physical blow, grinding her face into the awful realization that, although she was just his project, she cared about him. Maybe more than a friend. Judging by his twisted mouth and scowl, he certainly didn't welcome it.

He used his hand on the wall to push off of it and away from her. He hitched his elbow out in an invitation for her to hold onto it, but it seemed like such a sarcastic gesture. He raised his eyebrows at her and then shrugged, letting his arm drop to his side.

"After you," he said in that same, cooler tone.

She fought hard to swallow down the hurt and bewilderment and followed him towards the shop door. Despite Draco's closeness and her own warming charm, she couldn't seem to shake the cold that had seeped in from the night.

* * *

A/N: Surprise? So, what do you guys think of Draco's past? Believable? What do you think is going to happen because of the last part of the chapter?

Also, sorry about missing last week. I've been preoccupied with some health stuff and finding a job again.


	39. In which there is a Santa

The next few weeks were a chaos of studying and sort-of-avoiding Draco. She was scared; she could admit to herself. She wasn't sure how much she could take of his colder attitude. He still wasn't his nasty past-self, but he wasn't making it difficult for her to avoid him. It was a relief in some respects but it also hurt to see him nearly every day and not have his smile or a friendly word. She was surprised that she had come to count on them.

Still, she didn't have too much time to dwell on this as she was trying to cram as much studying in as she could. She didn't study with Draco anymore or with Shandra and John as much because they tended to study with Draco. Daryn studied late at night when the others were already gone and so Hermione and Daryn became more frequent study partners. Given anyone, she was glad it was him. She felt comfortable with him. Safe.

On one of their nights, she woke up to find her head resting on several closed textbooks. She sat up, rubbing her forehead to try to erase the crease-mark she was certain was there. Across from her, Daryn lay sprawled across his report. She reached over and shook him awake. He groaned, pushing himself off of the table, and the report stayed attached to the side of his mouth.

She stifled a laugh and pointed to his face. He frowned down at the paper and pulled it off but it had left some ink on the side of his mouth. She broke down into a giggle.

Rolling his eyes, he rubbed at his face. Then, looking down at his drool-soaked report, he said, "I guess we should call it a night."

Hermione glanced at the clock. "The janitor will be here soon, anyways."

As they packed up, Daryn glanced towards her and said, "I do appreciate you studying with me, and especially tutoring me on the parts that I slept through." At this, he rubbed the back of his head guiltily. "But, is it really good for you to be losing so much sleep?"

Hermione shook her head. "I have to stay awake until I'm completely exhausted in order to sleep without the potions. It's no trouble."

His eyebrows furrowed but then he nodded. "Is taking less potions helping?"

She shrugged. "My magic is coming back."

His head jerked up and she realized she hadn't told him about the incident at the Young Wizard's Club. He hadn't known that her magic had been gone.

She tried to distract him by asking, "I've been wondering… why you are staying up so late every night?"

He followed her lead in the conversation. "Oh, I just spend most of my Fridays and Saturdays on the band's gigs. I have to make up for it during the week."

"Why are you still doing it if it's hurting your studies?" Hermione couldn't help but ask.

"To me, my music is just as important as my studies. This is a really crucial time to continue performing. We've cornered the market. There's not a lot of young Wizard bands right now. If we don't continue to build our fan-base now we might loose our momentum."

She could understand it. The entertainment business was tough. She couldn't help worry what it would do to his professional life. Still, it sounded like it really was his passion so she said, "Once final exams are over, please invite us to another of your music gigs."

He returned her smile. "I've got one the weekend before Christmas and a New Year's gig. I'll give you the times to both."

They walked quietly for a moment before Daryn tilted his head back to her. "But, is everything really alright for you?"

Hermione stiffened.

"Did something happen at the Young Wizarding Club? I heard you and Draco arguing."

Hermione looked down at his hand gripped around hers and sighed. She hadn't gone to the club since the incident and Draco had decided to confront her about it earlier that day. When she had asked why he cared he had responded that it didn't matter what he thought but that the kid that fell of the stairs thought she was dead and that it was his fault.

She had stared at Draco as she struggled with not only the guilt but also the reality that she really was insignificant to him. When she couldn't think of anything to say that didn't reveal one or the other she had turned her back on him and stomped away.

He had yelled her name after her. Really, that was almost the worst part. How could he use her first name when he didn't care about her? She had thought it meant more. Had meant they were becoming more.

After a little she finally just shook her head and forced a smile for Daryn. "We always argue, don't we?"

Daryn nodded a little. "Yes, I guess that's true."

And it was. It just felt different now.

…

Final exams came and Hermione passed her classes. Though, not with the lead she usually had. With a certain amount of horror, she saw not one but two Bs (the equivalent of an E.E.) on her final grades. She wanted to burn it. She wanted to cry. She didn't want to think what her parents would say. She settled on crumpling the paper and throwing it across the kitchen before getting a potion. She wouldn't have to be so tight-laced during the winter holiday, she reasoned.

She slept for twelve hours the first night after the exams and the pattern continued for the rest of the week. Now that she had more sleep, her nightmares crept in again and made it feel like a lot less sleep. It also seemed now that she was more relaxed, her episodes were coming more frequently. She had upped her dosage of her other potions and, now that she knew to look for it, she could tell her magic was dulling again.

She thought about owling Draco, but what would she say? She couldn't think of anything that sounded needy or desperate. She didn't need him. She didn't want his help if he only gave it as some sort of reparation.

It wasn't until she was Christmas shopping for when she returned to Britain that she realized she would have to talk to Draco no matter how he felt about her. She had promised to show Ari muggle things. What was more muggle than Santa? She would find it hard to excuse herself from showing Ari a muggle Christmas.

The looming awkwardness with Draco made her hesitate but what did he have to do with it other than giving Ari permission? Surely things weren't that bad between her and Draco from… whatever had happened. Even if he came she could invite Daryn and his little sister, Jordan. That would probably make it less awkward. Daryn probably needed a break from preparations for the two high-profile performances coming up during the holidays.

It turned out that Draco would be coming. Hermione felt a mix of dread and excitement at reading his owl. It had been less than two weeks but she couldn't help wanting to see him or hear a dead-pan remark delivered in his whiny (but somehow endearing?) voice. She was becoming an idiot-in-love again and this time the guy didn't even like her. What good was book-smarts when she just made a mess of the rest of her life?

When she contacted Daryn, he said he would be occupied with prep for his band's gig later that day but volunteered Shandra to bring Jordan along.

…

"You look like shite."

Startled, Hermione looked up to see Draco and Ari approaching her behind a group of teenagers who had come to hang out at the mall.

It certainly wasn't one of the greetings she had been hoping to hear upon seeing him again. Were they really back to insults like in Hogwarts? She folded her arms and lifted her chin. "I don't care what you think of my appearance, Malfoy, and didn't I tell you not to insult me anymore?"

He frowned and then tilted his head. "No, it's the winter hols. You should look better, not worse."

She paused. Was that friendly or just concern over his project? She shifted her head so she was hidden behind her bushy hair. "Well, at least don't swear in front of Ari. Let's wait in line and have Shandra and Jordan join us when they get here." She reached her hand out to Ari. "Ready?"

Ari considered it and then reluctantly took her hand. "What are you guys fighting about this time?" he asked.

She blushed and snuck a glance to see if Draco had heard. He seemed absorbed in one of the shop decorations so she just shrugged. How could she explain something she wasn't sure of herself? They queued behind a harried-looking mother with a pram and a toddler.

"I want a pony," the toddler announced. "A pink pony!"

"Yes, Ben. You tell Santa that," the mother said distractedly.

"Big as Daddy's."

"I don't think so, sweetie," the mother replied in the same preoccupied tone.

As Hermione was wondering whether Daddy had a giant pink pony, Shandra called towards the group. She hurried towards them, her hand gripped around Jordan's small one.

"Oh, there you guys are. Yeesh, it's a circus around here. If it wasn't for your hair and that green shirt I don't know if I'd have found you!" Shandra said, tapping Draco's shirt with a finger. Hermione tried to ignore the instant irritation at seeing Shandra touching Draco.

"That, of course, was my aim," Draco responded drily.

Not quite up to being civil to Shandra, Hermione leaned down a little to smile at Jordan. She was very festive again, her braids pulled up in silver bows with jingle bells slipped onto the ribbon and snowmen stickers stuck to her ears like earrings. "Hi, Jordan! What are you going to ask from Santa?"

Jordan glanced from Hermione to Ari and then wiggled side to side, looking down at her shiny gold shoes. "It's a secret."

"Oh, okay. What about you, Ari?"

Ari, who had been watching Jordan, folded his arms and scowled up at Hermione. "I don't know any muggle things."

"Oh…" Hermione chanced a glance towards Draco. Did he want to spend more time with her by window shopping?

He saw her looking and quirked an eyebrow.

"We need to help Ari find something to ask Santa for," she told him, waiting to see if he tried to back out of spending more time with her.

"Oh, how fun!" Shandra said. "There's a toy store just that way." She pointed. "We can all go."

Draco didn't protest so they all followed Shandra. Once there, she directed Ari towards the boys section and lead Jordan towards the girl's. Ari passed all the branded toys without a second glance, which didn't surprise her since they were muggle, and found the skateboards. Seeing Ari occupied, Hermione started towards the girls when Draco came to stand by her. She focused on controlling her breathing and not staring at the outlines of his muscles under his dress shirt.

"If he breaks his neck, I'm billing you."

Hermione hesitated and slowly pulled her gaze up to check his face. She would have taken it at a joke before yesterday. Now, she couldn't tell. It seemed like a friendly smirk. Maybe he was just better at hiding his dislike now or she had been misinterpreting things before? But hadn't he said they were friends? Or had that been her? "This was Shandra's idea."

"Oh, passing the blame?" he asked, leaning down into her personal space. He smelled nice: an earthy scent that might have been his shaving cream but something else too. She took in a deep breath as she tried to identify it. Their eyes met and she was shocked by their near-blueness. They always looked grey until she got really close. Her neck hair stood up as he held her gaze, expression never changing. She quickly broke eye contact and stepped away, swallowing hard. Stupid hormones.

He sighed. "It's okay, you know."

Hermione's head whipped back around. Did he know that she had feelings for him?

"I'll stay as far away as you need," he continued, his face expressionless. His eyes were almost shut as he watched her, then his teeth pulled at his lip.

Hermione forced herself to stop looking at his mouth. What exactly was he talking about? He wanted to stay away to make sure she didn't develop a crush on him? She tried to gather her thoughts for the right response when she heard wheels clicking quickly along the floor towards them.

She turned just as Draco clotheslined Ari off of the skateboard. The kid crashed to the floor and the skateboard bounced off of Hermione's shoes. Hermione immediately dropped to the ground to check if Ari was okay. As she reached for his head, he sat up and waved away her hand.

"What do you think you were doing?" Draco asked. Hermione winced at his sharp tone.

Ari rubbed the back of his head. "Trying it out? That's why we're here," he grumbled.

"By running into people?"

Hermione quickly stood between the two. "Draco, stop it!"

Draco turned on her. "So I'm supposed to let him run into you with a skateboard?"

"It was his first time. He's allowed to make mistakes!"

He looked her up and down and then turned to Ari. "Put it away." Draco pointed with his chin at the skateboard.

The boy griped to himself as he picked up the board and dragged it back to its place.

Draco turned back to her. "Did you want me to step aside and laugh when you fell on your butt?"

Hermione made sure not to wince at the last comment. It hit too close to her worries about where their relationship might devolve into.

"It's not always a dichotomy, Draco," she whispered. She hunched her shoulders a little and then turned away to find the girls. They were sitting in the middle of an aisle while Shandra pulled things off the shelves and offered them to Jordan.

"What about this one? She's a ballerina!"

Jordan shook her head. "I want an American Girl doll. They've got one that looks like me."

"Oh," Shandra set the Barbie box down. "Hmm, maybe if Daryn and I help Santa it can be a gift from all of us?"

Jordan smiled and nodded. "Yes! Momma could get her clothes."

Hermione helped the two return all the rejected toys to their original places and then they returned with the boys to the Santa line.

When they arrived there were only two people in line ahead of them. They had barely started up a conversation and it was Ari's turn. Ari hesitantly approached the Santa, who gave a friendly 'ho ho ho' and patted his lap. Ari sat down on the man's lap and whispered into his ear. Santa nodded and patted Ari's head. Ari awkwardly hopped down and was ushered to the side by an assistant.

Shandra led Jordan up to Santa next and stood by as Jordan whispered up to Santa as well. It took her a really long time and Hermione could only guess that she was detailing the outfits she wanted for her doll as well. Hermione watched Shandra's scrunched face and guessed she was trying to memorize everything to tell the rest of the family.

Hermione figured Jordan wouldn't mind repeating it to Shandra and was mulling over telling Shandra this when Draco whispered into her ear. "What do you think he asked for?"

His breath was warm against her skin and she shivered. The nearness of him leaning over her was sending prickles along her neck and shoulders. She gulped and then turned to pin him with a glare. "Probably whichever one you seemed to like less."

Draco leaned back again. "How am I supposed to play Santa if I don't know?"

Jordan had finished and had hopped down to follow the assistant offering candy canes.

"Like this," Hermione hissed at Draco and marched straight up to the Santa. She plopped down on his lap.

The Santa blinked a couple times behind his half-moon glasses and then said loudly, "Oh ho ho, and what would you like, little lady?"

"What did the boy just ask for?" she whispered.

The Santa's salt-and-pepper eyebrows cleared and he answered in a similar conspiratorial tones.

Draco apparently decided it was a group activity because he hopped on the man's other leg before she could stand up.

"And, um, what do you want, young man?" the Santa didn't sound as amused.

Hermione's face felt warm and she was sure she was blushing. What was he doing?

Draco didn't take his eyes off of Hermione's as he said, "I want what she wants."

Her thoughts immediately jumped to how his lips were almost-parted and how she wanted to press her own mouth against his. If she wasn't blushing already, she certainly was now. She jumped up and grabbed Draco's arm, dragged him off of the Santa's leg.

A few steps away Hermione realized she overreacted and dropped Draco's arm quickly, not quite able to look in him the eye.

"What was that for?" he grumbled. "Why are you the only one who gets to know what Ari-" he stopped as they reached Ari.

"What did you both ask for?" Ari asked.

Draco brought a finger to his lips. "If I tell it won't come true."

"It's not a birthday wish," Hermione scoffed.

"That's right," Shandra joined in. "Santa will bring it even if you tell everyone." Her eyes slid over to Jordan and Hermione smiled, thinking she really should mention that thought to Shandra. They all started walking back towards the mall exit, passing the smells of chocolate and Christmas spices wafting from nearby shops.

Ari made a disbelieving sound with his teeth. "Santa isn't-"

"What did you ask for, Ari?" Hermione asked loudly to interrupt the rest of his sentence.

Ari raised his eyebrows and then put a finger in front of his lips. "If I tell it won't come true," he said mockingly.

"Well, Santa has other methods." Draco's eyes slid briefly over to Hermione.

"Torture will not work," Ari said solemnly, putting his hands on his hips.

Hermione couldn't help the stiffening of her shoulders or the quick in breath. She really didn't want flashbacks now.

"Wouldn't dream of it." Draco ruffled Ari's hair. His hand still on Ari's head, Draco tilted his head towards Hermione. "Very uncouth way to obtain information."

It was strange. He was part of the memory, but she just wanted his hand. It didn't matter how he felt about her; she could just pretend that he really was her friend. She reached out a hand towards Draco, hoping. That he would take it. That it would stop the screamed curses that had started to loop in her head. That it would mean something.

* * *

A/N: We almost made it to Christmas in July? lol 


	40. Christmas in WINY

Her hand was barely outstretched when he used his free hand to grab it.

He didn't let go as they walked out of the mall or when they took the buses over to WiNY for Daryn's concert.

As they stood in the crowded bus, they were nearly pressed together, their clasped hands the only thing between them. She couldn't look at him. She had barely looked at him the whole time they had held hands. It was too embarrassing. By that time the flashbacks had stopped. She had said she wasn't needy. She had decided not to accept his offerings of pity. Yet, at the first sign of trouble she had figuratively run back to him. Then there was the problem that she didn't want to let go of his hand. Even if the comfort was false she wanted it. The bus took a sharp turn and his hand tightened harder around hers. She tried not to wriggle her fingers or even move her hand too much in case he would let go.

When they reached their stop, Draco moved towards the exit, her hand still in his. It was awkward to maneuver around the other people with their hands connected. One older lady gave Hermione a look when her elbow accidentally jostled the lady as they tried to slip through. Sighing, Hermione loosened her grip on Draco's hand. He looked back briefly, his eyebrow quirked, before letting her hand go and moving the rest of the way out of the bus. When he was out of sight, she pulled her hand up and brushed where his fingers had been along the side of her face.

In WiNY the glimmering Christmas trees filled every spot of sidewalk between shop doors. A menorah's candles were glinting behind one of the windows. Above the crowded walkways, star ornaments bobbed, catching the light as they turned. It was even busier than the mall they had just left and they all instinctively moved closer to each other.

"But Daryn made it sound like this was going to be a small event!" Hermione said loudly.

Shandra laughed. "Daryn has always been too modest."

"Look!" Ari pointed between them. "Hot chocolate!"

They still had some time so they queued for the hot chocolate stand.

Hermione was mostly silent as they waited in line, watching as Daryn's band warmed up on a platform in the middle of the square. Over the rattle of the drums, Daryn and the other guitarist plucked their strings as they tuned their instruments.

"Hey," –Draco grabbed her shoulder- "The line-"

Hermione nearly jumped out of her skin. She stepped back and held her hand to her chest for a moment as her heart calmed.

When she looked up, Draco was frowning. "You know," he said slowly, eyes narrowing. "I'm not trying to invade your boundaries. For the love of Merlin just tell me-"

"Hey, what do you guys want?" Shandra called from ahead of them.

Hermione, who had been staring at Draco in confusion, hurried past him to order.

They found Luna and Rolf, who Hermione had invited, and squeezed onto the bench that Luna had transfigured. Hermione ended up between Luna and Jordan and Ari between Luna and Rolf. It was just tight enough that Hermione's shoulders brushed both of her seatmate's. They were two people she had come to like so, instead of feeling uncomfortable, she was cheered by their warmth. Ari looked wary of Rolf but happily started talking to Luna about the pixies he had found in his garden and the mishaps that had followed.

Ari was telling how one of the pixies had found its way into one of his brother's trouser legs when Jordan tugged on Hermione's sleeve.

Hermione looked down and Jordan offered up her Styrofoam cup. "Is it ready to drink yet?"

Fitting her own cup between her legs, Hermione pulled off the lid and was greeted with a soft puff of steam curling around her chilled nose and cheeks. "Test it with your little finger," she told the girl.

Jordan hesitantly slid the tip of her finger into the hot chocolate and immediately pulled it out again. "Ow!"

"So… no," Hermione guessed.

Jordan pouted as Hermione snapped the lid back on. Hermione tried to ignore Shandra and Draco on the other side of Jordan as Shandra giggled and Hermione felt something suspiciously like jealously rising up in response.

"Don't worry. It will be soon," Hermione assured Jordan. "You wouldn't want a burnt tongue anyways?"

Shortly afterward, the band started their actual performance. The same guy who had introduced the band during the concert did the same this time. He was the tallest of the group, a black man with his dreads pulled high at the back of his head with what looked like a silver ribbon and jingle bells. He, and all of other band members, wore deep blue dress robes with white fur lining. Around the perimeter of their stage, little bunches of mistletoe were magically suspended in the air.

Hermione looked down at Jordan and at the ribbons and bells in her hair.

"Jordan, your hair looks like the lead singer's."

Jordan reached up to touch her own jingle bells with a grin. "I gave them to him so we'd match."

He was still wearing them. It made Hermione like him automatically. "They look great!"

Mostly they played traditional Christmas carols with a modern twist to them; however, the last two sounded unfamiliar. Hermione wondered if they were the band's originals or traditional Wizarding songs.

She leaned down and asked Jordan if her brother had come up with them.

Jordan nodded happily. "His band did! They're really good. They let me dance to their songs."

Reminded of that, Jordan slurped the last bits of her hot chocolate from her mug, jumped up, and then pulled at Draco's trouser leg.

"You have to dance with me during this song!" she announced.

Draco, who had been in conversation with Shandra, looked down. "Do I?" he asked, a small smile pulling at his mouth.

"This song is their best dance song," Jordan told him, hands on her hips.

Draco sighed and stood up, sending a pained look towards Hermione. "Come with me?" he mouthed. Hermione's chest squeezed. Why did he ask her? Could she say no? Maybe, but it would have taken more self-control than she wanted to exert. Hermione stood up as well.

"Ari, want to come?" she asked.

"Uh… no," Ari said, folding his arms and scooting back as far as he could on the bench.

"I will!" Luna said, jumping up, and Rolf followed suit.

There was a little clearing in front of the band's stage and Draco had started dancing with Jordan in the middle, swirling her around like he had before. When he looked up and saw the rest of them had come to join him, a little pinch between his eyebrows eased. His dancing loosened from the stiffness before.

Luna and Rolf immediately started into what looked like a variation of the foxtrot and so Hermione was left by herself. Feeling incredibly awkward, she swayed to the music and smiled up at Daryn. He looked up from his guitar, his forehead glistening slightly with sweat, and then beamed back as he noticed her and the rest of them dancing. Well, she thought, if it made him that happy she didn't mind making a bit of a fool of herself.

The lead singer stepped up and announced the ending of their show, inviting the audience to come up and talk with the band. In one moment she had been standing there, virtually sticking out like a sore thumb, and in the next she was surrounded by crowds of people. Frantically she pushed down the sudden panic in her throat and searched for Draco. He had pulled Jordan onto his shoulders and was standing wide-legged in the flow of people. She started towards him without thinking about it, and, even when her brain caught up, she continued pressing towards him.

He frowned at her as she approached him. "Hermione?" he asked.

She shook her head. "Just for a little bit. Please?" She stepped around him, her head pressed against Jordan's back and her arms reaching backwards to feel Draco's sides.

He didn't say anything so she assumed it was okay. Even the slight brush of his shirt against her fingertips was sending her heart rate up. She resisted the temptation to grab a handful of it.

"Look, it's Daryn!" Jordan said, bouncing a little.

Hermione turned her head and saw Daryn leaning down to talk with a pretty brown-skinned girl.

"Daryn!" Jordan yelled.

He looked up and at that same moment the girl reached up on her tip toes and kissed his cheek.

He clapped his hand onto his cheek and stared after her as she giggled and disappeared into the crowd.

"Come on, Draco, let's go to Daryn," Jordan instructed.

Draco started moving, and Hermione instinctively followed.

By the time they had made it through the crowd, Daryn was looking at them again. Hermione felt reasonably safe sandwiched between Draco and the stage and was able to relax enough to ask, "Who was that?"

Daryn shook his head. "Kayla. She's been at most of our gigs." Hermione thought she could see his dark skin darken just a little more with a blush.

"Seems sweet," Hermione said innocently.

Daryn rolled his eyes. "She is."

"Daryn," Jordan reached her arms out.

Daryn grabbed under her armpits and hefted her off Draco's shoulders. As he transferred her onto his own shoulders, the rest of their group came up to crowd around the stage.

"Your voice could calm a Umgubular Slashkilter," Luna said. She patted Rolf's shoulder. "Rolf doesn't like this sort of music but he was still nodding his head along."

Daryn's face pulled into a smile with the edges turned down a little. "Uh, thanks Luna. I really appreciate you guys coming out to listen to us."

"Did you guys expect this many people?" Hermione asked.

He grinned and his eyes swept the crowd. "I've never dreamed that just our band could pull in this many people." He shrugged. "Of course, it's also the Saturday before Christmas so more people are out than usual."

"Daryn, did you want me to take Jordan?" Shandra asked, her hands out in offering.

Daryn looked up at Jordan, who tightened her grip on his waved hair. "Nah, we'll be fine. Swing by before you leave?"

"Trying to impress the ladies?" Shandra asked, hand on her hip. He did make an adorable picture with Jordan perched on his shoulders.

Daryn raised his eyebrows and then postured. "I will do anything for the ladies."

Jordan giggled, burying her head against Daryn's.

A group of tittering girls approached Daryn from the other side and Hermione decided to withdraw, giving him a wave of her hand. "See you on New Year's?"

Daryn smiled and nodded before being pulled into a conversation with the girls.

The group dispersed into the rest of WiNY, looking to do some last minute Christmas shopping, leaving Hermione and Draco standing side-by-side.

He scuffed his dress-shoe along the cobble-stones and pulled his coat closer around himself, the collar dragging across his chin as he did. When he noticed her watching, he quirked an eyebrow, a soft half-smile forming at his lips briefly before fading as he turned away to watch the crowd.

She thought of his gentleness that day and his cryptic words. Maybe… maybe it was just a hope, but maybe things were different that she thought. "What did you mean back there? About boundaries?" she asked.

Draco, who had been watching Ari, slid his gaze back to her. He rolled his eyes and sighed. "I'm sick of you flinching when I touch you. Just tell me what I can and can't do so you'll stop cringing."

Hermione's mouth dropped open. That's what he thought was going on? "You just… surprise me sometimes. That's all." Well, not all. There were other times it was his stupid handsome face but there was no way she was saying that out loud.

He raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

She gulped and her eyes slid along his thin nose and lips. "What do you mean, am I sure?"

"It's okay if you don't like being touched by me." He had gone back to watching Ari as he walked with Luna.

Hermione shook her head, and stepped towards him. Did that mean he wanted to touch her? Otherwise he just would have stopped, right? "Draco…" She slid her hand onto his shoulder, mostly only feeling the rough surface of his coat until his muscles shifted underneath when he turned to look at her. They were so close now, his eyes following the path of her fingers. She stopped short of his neck. "You mean you don't mind? The, uh, touching?"

He met her gaze and then turned back to her mitten. He slowly brought his gloved hand up to hers and gently pulled it off of his shoulder. He wanted her hand off of him? She bit her lip. So he did mind. Her chest hurt.

He brought her hand up to his face. "Why would I mind?" he asked. Then, watching her with his grey-blue eyes, he gently brushed her hand along his cold-reddened cheeks. She tracked the motion, her fingertips tingling.

"But… aren't you doing this because of AA?" she asked as her brain was muddled by thoughts about his slightly stubbled jawline.

He frowned. "Doing what?" he asked.

Silently she used her other hand to point between them. "As restitution."

Draco snorted, "I'm not some bleeding-heart Gryffindor. I wouldn't do all this because of a ruddy step."

"So, we're really friends?"

He smirked. "I'm your friend if you're my friend."

Elated, she let go of his hand to wrap both of her hands around his neck.

She feel his quick intake of breath against her cheek, the stubble she had seen was roughly dragged against her forehead with a turn of his head. His hands slowly slid around her back and sent electric shots up along her spine. His fingers dug into her and pulled her forward so she was supported against him, her chest and stomach were pressing against him. Her stomach dropped a little at sudden contact. It was nothing like the hugs she gave Harry or even Ron. She quickly pulled back, and his hands slid along to the backs of her arms before dropping away.

His upper lip twitched upward. "I didn't know you were so demonstrative."

Hermione bit her lip and looked away.

She didn't have to respond because Luna had returned. "Didn't you ever see her with Ron and Harry?"

Draco lifted both of his hands up, his shoulders lifting. "Harry has never been normal in his life."

Luna smiled gently. "That's how she shows her love."

Hermione's face was on fire. "Luna!"

"Ari wanted to go buy presents," Luna continued, glancing over her shoulder towards Ari and Rolf, who were staring into a shop window.

"And I've got the money bag," Draco supplied, fishing around in his coat pockets. He raised an eyebrow at Hermione. "You coming?"

Hermione checked her watch and shook her head. "I need to get packing if I want to show up on time at the Burrow tomorrow."

Draco stiffened. "The Burrow? I thought you weren't with Ron anymore. Why are you going to his place?"

Hermione lifted both eyebrows. Why did he care? "It's the easiest place to get a port-key to. Harry's place is unplottable and my parents" –she hesitated- "still don't want magic in their lives."

His eyes hooded as she struggled over mentioning her parents. "How is your relationship with them?"

She lifted one shoulder. "I don't know. I'll be staying with them over the hols." She bit her lip; she had no idea how that would go.

Draco briefly glanced at Luna, who had been watching the exchange, before stepping towards Hermione. He slowly lifted a hand to rest it on her shoulder. She briefly let her eyes slide shut and savor the gentle pressure of his grip. "They are your family. Nothing will change that," he said softly. She opened her eyes to meet his, his eyebrows drawn together and his head slightly bent towards hers. He gently squeezed her shoulder.

He was probably thinking of his family. Had he mentioned what his current relationship with his mother was? "Thanks, Draco," she whispered, forcing a smile. She wanted to close the space between them. A kiss was out of the question but maybe a hug?

He tilted his head. "See you at New Year's?"

She gave in. She leaned forward again, pressing her cheek against his chest and slipping her hands under his upper arms. He automatically wrapped his arms around her. It felt so safe there. She didn't want to leave. He gently rubbed the top of her head, his fingers brushing her scalp. She leaned into his hand for a moment before nodding. The wool of his coat rubbed against her face.

"Of course. Have a happy Christmas, Draco.

He squeezed her upper-back, one of his hands sliding to the back of her neck and cupping it gently. "Happy Christmas, Hermione," he whispered back.

* * *

A/N: Thank you guys for your patience!


	41. In which there are many Weasleys

Hermione stumbled when she landed in the Weasley's backyard. She had only brought her beaded purse and so both hands were free to windmill desperately until she got her footing. Having avoided soaking the knees of her jeans in the muddy lawn, she looked up to see who had witnessed her clumsy entrance. However, no one was there except the lawn gnomes. At a stern look and a brandished wand, none of them strayed too close. Picking her way along the edges of the path to avoid the deepest mud, Hermione called out towards the house, "Hello?"

There was some movement behind the curtains but the closed windows shut in any noise.

"Hello?" she tried again. As the silence continued she pushed aside the broom lying against the fence and pulled open the gate. Immediately, the squawking of a very distressed bird echoed across the grounds. Hermione stepped through the gate and the sound became so loud that she covered her ears. "Anyone?" she yelled over the screeching.

A door banged and George came running around the corner of the house. His severe look broke into a smile when he saw her.

"Hermione!" He did a complicated wave of his wand and the awful noise stopped.

"Thank you," she yelled back in relief.

He continued his run until he reached her and swept her up into a massive hug. Hermione laughed and hugged him back.

"I didn't know you'd be home," she told him.

He stepped back and shrugged. "Working on some experiments in the shack I've got set up here. The explosions seem to scare the customers." He winked. "Ron said you'd be stopping by. You going to stay for the night?"

Hermione shook her head and couldn't look him in the eyes as she mumbled, "Don't want to intrude… I was actually just going to say hello before I left."

"Thinking you're gonna get thrown out on your ear just because you aren't dating Ron anymore?" George guessed.

Hermione bit her lip and looked up for his reaction.

"I always knew you were too smart to be dating him anyway."

She giggled. "That wasn't really the problem…"

George smiled. "Well, if you ever need an ear, I'll lend you mine."

Hermione raised an eyebrow at his second ear pun.

"You'll have to return it, though, it's the only one I've got left."

She raised both eyebrows. "Are you usually this full of ear puns?"

"Depends on the person." George smirked. "I play it by ear."

Hermione groaned and his half-smile became full blown. As he turned his head she saw that his right ear was still the mangled clump of skin that had developed as it healed.

"You decided not to have it magically altered?"

"Those cosmetic witches charge a fortune and I did try a new prototype of the extendable ear but" –he pulled an exaggerated grimace- "there is a reason we mortals have the hearing limits we do."

Hermione laughed.

"It does mean I've got blackmail on literally everyone in the house." George waggled his eyebrows. "If you ever need it."

"I'm sure you've already found various devious uses for it," Hermione said, shaking her head. She pulled her coat closer as a gust of wind blew through her.

"I'm talking your ear off and you're shivering." He waved her towards the door. "Let's go inside."

As they approached the house, the muffled sound of music beat through the air. George pushed open both halves of the kitchen door and the warmth and smell of baked bread rushed out as well as the full impact of the radio being blasted in the kitchen.

"Really, George, stop letting the cold air in," Molly said without looking up as she orchestrated several cooking spells at once.

"Mum, look what I found out in the cold."

Molly looked up and her eyes widened. With a gesture the radio quieted considerably and she rushed forward. "Oh, my dear! Come in, come in!" She pulled Hermione into a hug, crushing Hermione against Molly's soft body. Hermione couldn't move her arms and settled on patting Molly's sides. Molly pulled back and gave her a once-over before pulling her towards the kitchen table and nearly forcing her to sit down. "Let me put on a cuppa. You must be freezing!" Molly turned away and started rummaging through the cupboards.

Hermione pulled an overwhelmed smile at George and he laughed.

"With all that American quick food you must be longing for a home-cooked meal!" Molly continued as she fixed the tea.

George pulled up a chair next to Hermione and sat down. "Did you hear that Ginny is playing for the Holyhead Harpies?"

Hermione started to nod but Molly was already talking again. "And I'm proud of her, I really am, but I told her that Harry is getting angsty to start a family soon and she would have to stop soon for that anyway."

"Harry wants a family now?" Hermione asked, raising an eyebrow at George.

George shrugged but Molly nodded sagely. "I was talking to Ginny about some adorable clothes at Charmed Child and Harry perked up all the way across the room. Poor dear, he's been lonely all his life and deserves a good big family."

Hermione decided not to comment on any of the erroneous parts of that statement and merely smiled and thanked Molly when she brought the tea to the table.

They had sat over their tea for awhile, chatting about the inane happenings that had occurred over the few months she had been gone.

Hermione's fingers had just begun to thaw when Molly set down her cup and gave Hermione a look. "It's a shame that you never come over anymore, I so enjoy talking to you."

Hermione smiled. "I've missed you too-"

"-I wish you and Ron had worked out that first time," Molly continued. "Then you wouldn't be so far away now."

Hermione winced and George patted her back. "Mum."

"Isn't there a school within floo distance?" Molly continued. "This American school sounds so… well, Muggle. How will that help you in the wizarding world?" she asked just as someone's feet clunked down the stairs. They all looked up to see Ron, head in the newspaper, as he reached the bottom.

"Oh, Ron, dear, Hermione is back!" Molly called. "Why don't you show her around the Auror's office before dinner? You've done so well there I'm sure she'd find it fascinating!"

Ron looked up from the newspaper with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth. "Hermione?" he asked, scanning the room.

Hermione gave him an awkward wave. "Hey, Ron."

Ron swallowed. "Right. You were coming now weren't you?"

"A certified genius we've got here," George muttered.

Hermione smiled and Ron reddened. "Sod off," he grumbled and then turned back to her. He gave her a dopey grin before opening his arms out in expectation of a hug.

Hermione froze and, before she thought of anything to say, he had walked up to her chair and embraced her from the side with his 4'o clock shadow scratching her forehead. She held still for a moment before leaning away to break his hold. "What's this about the Auror's office?" she asked.

"Do you want to go?" he asked eagerly. "Harry probably is still there. Things with the snakeheads seem to be going pear shaped lately."

Hermione hadn't planned to stay for tea, let alone be dragged anywhere with Ron. It seemed it was still hard not to be sucked into the current of Weasley life. It had been like that when she was dating Ron as well and Molly's comments were still as pointed as ever. Figuring she could escape Ron more easily than the whole family in force, she nodded.

She got up and gave George another hug.

"Don't let him impress you too much," he said. "The Aurors' secretary has been run ragged with all the extra paperwork he's given her ever since he started."

"Oi!" Ron broke them up and pulled Hermione towards the floo. "Don't go poisoning her with your stupid jokes!"

Hermione rolled her eyes and George snorted as they disappeared into the floo.

...

Ron was able to navigate with surprising efficiency through the corridors and elevators to the Auror level. Once they had asked each other about their work and family, there was little more they could talk about. The awkward silence reinforced something she had already realized: they had very little in common beyond Harry and their magic.

If she had hoped that Auror training would help him make the transition from man-child to actual man, she had hoped in vain. Hearing again Ron's vague aspirations as an Auror and apparent apathy about everything else besides food and Qudditch made Hermione bite her lip in irritation. Their differences of ambition had been one of the first and main points that pushed her away from Ron. She had tried to look past it because he was a boy who knew her and actually liked her. He didn't mind that she was a know-it-all or that she was a tad prudish. When he made the effort, he could be charming even if he wasn't a good listener, but no one was perfect, right? Her integrity to her own values eventually out-weighed her desire for a boyfriend, even if it was her long-time crush. These thoughts of their past brought her back to the conclusion she had made back before she left for the Americas: she would have to let go of the desire to find a boyfriend and just focus on her career. She was trying to shake these gloomy thoughts when the little origami notes in the air started dive bombing her and she had to put up a magical-shield.

As a purple one damaged its wings against her barrier, she frowned at Ron. "Are you sure I should be here? None of the memos seem to think so."

Ron shrugged. "They always do that to non-Aurors. It's not like what we're doing is a bloody secret. Especially since that last attack."

Hermione turned her head sharply. "What attack?"

"The snakehead idiots tried to recruit a pureblood we were monitoring. Got away before we could catch anyone of them, though." Ron pulled an annoyed face.

They turned a corner and Ron opened a door into one of the offices. "Harry is setting it up so we'll know for sure-"

"Who are you telling about us now, Ron?" Harry said tiredly. Hermione followed Ron into the office to see Harry in the middle of a cloud of desperately flapping notes. Several of them pulled off of the group in a beeline for Hermione's face. She silently strengthened her barrier and they crumpled hard against it.

"Hey, Harry," she said.

Harry pulled his glasses down from his head and squinted through them. "Hermione?"

She nodded and started towards him. He ducked through the memos and then pulled her into a bear hug.

"I've missed you so much!" she told him.

"Yeah," he muttered and they stayed there for a moment before Harry looked up and broke the hug. "As for you, Ron, you can't keep bringing girls up here."

"Veronica wanted to become an Auror!" Ron protested.

"Please, Ronald," said another voice. Ginny was standing in the doorway glaring furiously at both of the young men. "Even you can't be that stupid."

Ron folded his arms and pouted.

Ginny glanced towards Hermione and smiled. "Hi, Hermione." She took a few long strides and gave Hermione a side hug before stepping back and glaring at Harry, her face hard again. "Harry," she said in a saccharine voice. "Can you explain this?" She pointed to a burly man who had stepped into the doorway. The man shifted from one foot to the other and then sent a pleading look towards Harry.

"Oh." Harry rubbed the back of his head uncomfortably. "Yeah, I didn't think you'd mind."

"Wouldn't mind being babysat?" Ginny's voice pitched up and she started to advance on Harry.

Harry backed up until he hit the desk and almost disappeared again under the flurry of memos.

"Which part of 'I can take care of myself' did you miss?"

Harry batted at the flying paper. "I know that-"

"I am and always will be capable of taking care of myself! Why is everyone so set on me getting married and relying on the boy-who-thinks-I'm-weak?"

"I didn't- don't-"

Hermione sighed, "Ginny, maybe let him explain a little more before you-"

Ginny's eyes snapped back to Hermione. "Oh, you are going to side with him? You know how bad he can get."

"He is just trying to-"

"Protect me?" Ginny sneered. "Yeah, no thanks. I've had enough of that the first twenty years of my life."

"But you haven't known Harry for-" Ron started.

"Oh, sod off, Ron. I was talking about the tossers I have for brothers," snipped Ginny.

"I haven't," Ron said, hunching his shoulders up. "I've been a good brother, right, Hermione?" He turned a sullen look towards Hermione.

Hermione looked between Ginny's scowl and Ron's expectant look and decided it was time to escape. "I'm sure having six older brothers would be too much for anyone," she said diplomatically. "Erm, I meant to only stop by for a moment before going home to see my parents. I should go- but it was nice to see you two again. Ron, would you please walk me out to the floo?"

Ron barely acknowledged her before darting past the burly man who had inched out of the doorway back into the hallway.

"Excuse me," Hermione said as she slipped past the man and he responded with a tight-lipped smile.

As she followed Ron down the hall, Hermione had to reinforce her spell as the memos came back in full force. A few of the memos that had broken both wings still flopped on the floor and Hermione had to side step them.

After they got through the worst of it, Ron started sneaking glances towards her. Hermione resisted rolling her eyes and braced herself for whatever Ron was working himself up to. She used to think it was cute but now it was just annoying. It was tiring to be so careful of his ego. She had felt like she was his mother rather than his girlfriend.

When the apparation point came in view, she turned back to him to say goodbye. At the same moment he caught her hand and squeezed it with his clammy palm. "Ron," she protested.

"-Hermione," he interrupted. "You're coming back for dinner, right?"

She sighed. "No, Ron, I-"

"But you've forgiven me."

She closed her eyes briefly. "That's not it." She shook off his hand and turned away. "I didn't leave because of our stupid fight or that kiss."

He pulled her around so she was facing him again and he pushed his face earnestly towards hers. "Then what? What do I have to do?"

Hermione shook her head. "I don't want you to do anything for me." She inched around him and continued to walk towards the apparation point.

He caught her arm and held it until she looked back at him.

"I'll change. Whatever you tell me, I will do it." He stared intently at her, face solemn and devoted.

She grimaced and turned away again, breaking his hold. That was exactly what he didn't get. She didn't want someone who would change for her. The second he knew she was his, he would let everything slide again. People didn't really change- just their circumstances.

"You can't go, everyone will be expecting it. Mum's already started to plan our engagement party," Ron told her in a whining voice.

"Tell her whatever you want about me, Ron, but make sure she knows I'm not getting back together with you." Hermione didn't turn back before apparating to her parents' house.

* * *

Thank you guys for your support and I hope you are having a great summer :)


	42. Christmas in England

The Grangers may have been morning people but they were not the types to enjoy jumping straight into the day, even if that day was Christmas. Therefore, although all were awake before seven, nothing was consumed by the way of breakfast until nearly ten o' clock (with the exception of the required morning tea).

That also meant that by the time they were ready to have brunch, both of Hermione's parents were wide awake and not to be distracted from their current question.

She set down her fork and resisted rolling her eyes. "Of course I'm going back to school next semester."

They leaned back and exchanged looks.

"We're worried about your job prospects, honey," her mother explained as if they hadn't already spoken about this before she left. "Why not continue to pursue the real degree you got at Cambridge?"

Hermione stiffened.

"We know you finally felt like you had a place with these magic folk but it will limit your options to have a degree that only they recognize," her father said more gently as he stirred honey into his tea. "Think what someone would think if you said you got your doctorate in potions," he tried to joke.

"These 'magical folk' are my life now," she told her plate. "Have you opened Aunt Lucy's present yet?"

It was almost necessary to open any of Aunt Lucy's presents the moment they arrived.

Hermione's mother sighed. "I wish everyone else would agree to a name-drawing for gifts! That way we would only have to deal with hers every four years!"

"Baby snapping turtles and wilted lettuce," her father explained. "Animal control was happy to take care of them." At Hermione's raised eyebrow he amended, "Or, at least, willing to."

"Did we do something to upset her?" Hermione asked though it was as likely that Aunt Lucy thought that an acceptable gift as Hagrid would think blast-ended skewrts were acceptable pets. She had always thought they might get along well.

Conversation successfully derailed, they transitioned to gift opening without any squabbling about her job prospects.

Christmas was a much less magical affair than it used to be. It was hard to live up to a Christmas at Hogwarts and they didn't even have their usual ski trip and log cabin to add some Christmas cheer by way of snow and a cozy fire.

Hermione didn't mind, however. The log cabin had been too quiet for her. She had found herself constantly pausing to listen for a scuffing of a foot or looking for a flash of green light. At least here she knew she'd have a bit of an advanced warning. She had only been able to secretly install magical barriers and alarms at her parents' home but not the cabin. Ever since her parents had come back from Australia, they had been very strict about no magic in their presence and especially in their home. Even after several years they were still adamant about no spells but had become a little more lax about magical items or potions. Hermione took full advantage of this by giving them magical gifts in an attempt to swing their opinions around again in favor of magic.

Her mother had turned on Christmas carols and the strains of Bing Cosby filled the air as they gathered around the gold and red decorated tree. Her parents had taken to using these colors often as a sort of outward support for her magical inclinations although they still sometimes mispronounced Gryffindor or Hogwarts and nearly always referred to Slytherin as 'the Snake House.' Underneath the tree there were few presents and they were not hard to guess as they had fallen into a pattern over the years.

Her mother opened a small long box and pulled out an intricate origami boat. "Cruise," her mother guessed with a smile.

"But to where?" her father countered.

She shook the box until a small white ball covered in black hexagons fell out. "Football... Brazil? Spain?"

He nodded and she pulled out the envelope and tore it open. "Brazil! Oh, how lovely. I loved Rio de Janeiro last time we visited." She leaned over and gave him a peck on his cheek. "Will you be coming, Hermione?"

Hermione shook her head. "My program is year-round."

Her mother shrugged and pushed one of the boxes towards her. "Your turn."

Her mother had added to Hermione's investment portfolio again and her father had gotten her red and gold colored socks. Hermione supposed he had run out of ideas after all the other clothes items.

Hermione had gotten both of her parents some candyfloss as well as the mandatory 'I love New York' t-shirts as souvenirs.

The beginning of the day's excitement done, they left for twelve o' clock mass. There was a red stone cathedral near their house that her parents had attended every Sunday in Hermione's memory with the exception of their unplanned sabbatical in Australia. Hermione walked under it's familiar high arches and the traditional Christmas swags hung along the lower windows. Even through the pine branches, the stained glass caught the few rays of light filtering through the overcast sky and added a little glitter to an otherwise gloomy London afternoon. Inside, the decorations continued as every free surface was covered in pots of red and white poinsettias and another swag was draped over the priest's podium.

The priest prayed over the sacrament and Hermione sat in one of the pews with her head bowed. If called upon, she could probably repeat the words herself.

Now that she had graduated from Hogwarts, she had taken to attending church every Sunday again. At first, it had been a peace-offering to her parents and then it was because of the comfort she had gotten as she struggled through the internal and external aftermath of the war.

When she had seen the devastation left in the wake of Lord Voldemort and the god-like power that magic could bestow on a man, she had wondered if religion and magic could mix. It hadn't at Hogwarts but, then again, it hadn't been mixed into her other schools either. Up to that point, religion had been something that was part of her family and that she believed in a vague sort of way.

It wasn't until her desperate floundering to stay above the waves of hopelessness after the war that she looked for God and found him. However, as things became manageable again, she had taken to trying to walk on her own again and using anything she needed to do so. She had always believed, as her parents had taught her, that the only way to get through life was to rely on one's own abilities.

It was second nature to look to magic because it demanded her own talents and had not yet let her down. Until it did.

The priest had begun his sermon with the events leading up to Christ's birth and had moved on to drawing a parallel between the congregation and the innkeeper who had not had room for Joseph and his very-pregnant wife.

"Do you have room for the Christ-child?" the priest asked, looking over his small glasses and raising his robed arm in a gesture that took up the whole church. "He has come to each of us and asked to be let in! Is your life already full of the world that there is no room?" He pointed down to his bible. "We have been commanded to have no other gods before Him!

"Have you allowed alcohol or money to solve your problems instead of Him? What gods have you let in so you turn away the true God?"

Hermione's thoughts turned back to how much she had come to rely on magic. Had it become her god? After so long, her vision had tunneled to only searching for her answers in magic and the magic world. It was, in a sense, trusting in the strength of her own arm instead of God's. She wasn't trusting in God and she certainly wasn't trusting anyone else. Thinking back to support she had received from her parents and friends after the war, she knew that God often worked through others to give her the things she needed, but she had taken to casting that help aside in favor of magic and its promise of a fast cure and complete independence. But that wasn't God's way, was it? All of God's children were part of one body that was expected to serve and be served in turn.

Could she really trust that there was a way other than magic? Could she believe a God that said that all things could be done through Him and His strength? Could she really trust outside herself?

She wasn't sure she had a choice. Her ways were only hurting her in the end.

When the sermon ended the majority of the people headed towards the exits, chatting among themselves. Her parents and a few of the other regulars started to congregate in the middle of the benches to catch up with each other and wait out the bottle-necking at the doors. She was reintroduced to several of her parents' friends. Although her parents might not completely approve of her choices, they had had long experience in putting a spin on her life that made it sound prestigious and completely Muggle.

These virtual strangers oohed over her pursuing her medical degree after attending Cambridge and a cross country backpacking trip.

"My son loves hiking, you should go together some time!" one of the ladies in a huge pastel hat said.

Hermione smiled and explained that her 'backpacking' trip had cured her of her desire to spend much time in nature besides a lake-side resort. The group laughed obligingly and continued on to other safer topics.

Hermione studied the intricate wood carvings and paintings lining the walls and was distracted by some of the postings on a cork-board just inside the outermost doors. In big and easily read lettering, it announced an AA meeting the next two nights. It reminded her of the American Thanksgiving she had spent with Draco and made her wonder if he was going to another one this night as well. Did Harjeet and Samir celebrate Christmas? Were they having a holiday dinner with the other AA members again? She was happily distracted by this train of thoughts until the conversation died down and there was a general consensus that it was time to return home. Like many of their other friends, the Grangers thought a necessary part of Christmas was the Queen's speech. Therefore, there was a certain time for the Christmas meal to start in order to end in time to turn on the telly.

This Christmas was no different. They all settled down into the leathery sofa and sipped their eggnog as the Queen sat in her own staged room and wished them a Happy Christmas. It was so very Muggle that she wondered what Draco would think of it or of her parents in general. As she watched her parents, she was reminded of a nightmare that had repeated through most of the war and still came sometimes. They were sitting on the couch together, facing the telly, and a hooded man with a death-eater mask apparated behind them. She bolted up to help them only to realize that she was trapped inside the fireplace. She desperately fought to enter the room as a green light flashed from the man's wand and both of her parents slumped into each other. Hermione stared blindly at this vision of her dead parents before looking up to see her actual parents flirting. Her mother leaned across to kiss the whipped cream off of her father's lips and he pulled her closer for a longer kiss.

Safe. Still, the image of the death-eater was now overlaid with Draco and the two ideas merged until Draco was in a dark hood, mask pulled up over his hair, standing behind her parents with a nasty smirk pulling at his lips. "Filthy mudbloods," he sneered. Hermione could hear his voice echoed by the hundreds of times he had said that exact phrase at school. She knew the exact inflection of his voice and it haunted her thoughts.

It wasn't until much later into the evening that she was fully distracted from the memories of his childhood taunts by the torture of finishing a game of Monopoly with her highly competitive parents.

* * *

Christmas in July! Christmas in July!

Moved a few states over and now I'm trying to settle in. It seemed like the majority of people on the road were truckers and other people moving. Must be the time to do it, I guess?

Enjoy your weekend!


	43. Boxing Day

Boxing day was a day of football… at least for her mother. Her father tolerated it but spent a good amount of the morning rearranging his collection of action figures around the new one his wife had gotten him for Christmas.

Hermione left after brunch for the Burrow as she had promised the day to Harry and the Weasleys. As soon as she arrived, Hermione discovered that, rather than football, Quidditch was the game of the day for the Weasleys. She was hardly surprised.

Charlie swooped down on his broom until he was hovering right in front of Hermione. "Want to join us?"

Hermione shook her head. "Unless one side really needs a handicap I'll stay out."

"It can't be that bad!" he said, smiling.

Behind him Harry and Ron exchanged a glance. "No, it is," Harry said finally.

"You should have seen her," Ron said sagely. "Two feet off the ground and threatening to hex anyone who made her go higher."

Hermione could feel her neck heating up. "Really, Ron-"

"Hysterical. We had to get the professor to conjure a gravity minimizing field to get her higher than ten meters and she couldn't keep her eyes open…"

"Ron," Hermione said more sternly.

Ron glanced at her and then shrugged. "You have to admit it was kinda hilarious."

"No, I don't. It wasn't."

George rubbed his chin and smirked.

"Whatever you are thinking about, stop," Hermione told him.

"Me?" he asked innocently.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Yes, you. I do not want to find myself up on top of the Burrow tomorrow morning or get a broom for Christmas or whatever other depraved ideas you have running through your mind."

"Don't give him any more ideas, Hermione," Ginny said from on her broom behind him. "It's probably just something about one of his stupid inventions."

"You all wound me," George said with a completely unwounded face. "Surely all the height-phobic witches would not think this idea stupid." George leaned to guide his broom towards Hermione. "In fact," -he pulled a lazy circle around her- "as she is the inspiration of this invention, I would be willing to gift one to you, Hermione-"

Hermione grabbed his broom to hold it still as she sternly said, "I'm never going to try any of your prototypes ever again, George Weasley," There was general laughter and agreements from the others. Eventually Hermione was designated as score keeper and the game continued.

Harry did not have the agility or luck that he used to and so the game lasted into the late afternoon until it was called off so everyone could look for the snitch. As they walked their separate ways, Hermione rubbed at her cheeks and nose to try warm up the wind-chaffed skin. She had met up with Ginny in the forested area near the Burrow and they quickly scanned the woods with an occasional 'accio' pointed in a random direction. They both came out shaking their heads. Hermione was about to tell Ginny it seemed like a lost cause when Ginny gave her an odd look.

"Hermione, hold still."

Hermione resisted looking towards where Ginny was staring and raised her eyebrow. Ginny kept her stare intently behind Hermione, slowly reached past her, and quickly tugged at Hermione's hair.

"Ow! What are you doing?"

In response, Ginny pulled out a fluttering snitch still tangled in a few strands of bushy hair.

Hermione rubbed the back of her head. "I guess that's one way to catch a snitch."

Ginny snorted. "Or make the rest of us catch colds. I'm freezing!" She slung her arm around Hermione. "Let's get everyone else so we can go inside!"

As they all returned to the house, the guys chuckled over the discovery of the snitch.

"You weren't even playing but still managed to win the game," Charlie said.

"How'd you not notice it in your hair?" Harry asked.

Hermione shrugged. "I just thought it was the wind." Even pulled back into a ponytail, her hair had been yanked around by the strong gusts across the yard.

The teasing continued until they arrived at the Burrow and then everyone collapsed in front of the fire. They lay in various positions of exhaustion as Molly distributed hot chocolate but the boys still managed to give her a recount of the highlights of the game. During the time before dinner there was a peaceful lull as everyone was too tired to speak. Hermione found it very pleasant and just stared into the fire, not really thinking about anything. She pulled her blanket closer and couldn't even bring herself to mind too much that it smelled like Ron.

They stayed in drowsy silence until Molly announced dinner and there was a mass exodus of people from the living room to the kitchen table. Molly deftly slapped at Ron's hand as he slid into the chair next to Hermione and grabbed for a roll.

"Not yet, Ronald," his mother scolded.

During dinner Molly started up another conversation about Ron's job prospects and how well he was doing in the department. However, as she listened, Hermione couldn't help thinking Ron was in it for the ride and didn't seem to have any ambitions at all.

"What do you plan on doing next at work?" she asked him.

Ron shoved mashed potatoes in his mouth and then shrugged. Swallowing most of it, he said, "Chase bad guys until we get someone really big. That way people will remember that I helped after the war."

Hermione poked at her blood pudding. "And then what?"

Ron shrugged again. "I like George's joke shop and he'd give me job if I asked for it, wouldn't you, Georgie?"

George looked up. "Not if you call me that, Ronikins."

"For the rest of your life?" Hermione asked.

Ron grabbed another roll. "Why not? Who wouldn't want to work in a joke shop? Especially George's?"

Hermione couldn't help raising an eyebrow but she let the conversation go. It didn't really matter to her anymore what Ron's life ambitions were or were not.

…

Once they had cleaned up after dinner, Ron, George, Ginny, Harry, and Hermione all went outside to stare at the sky like they had been able to in Hogwarts. Hermione had never missed the sky until she stopped going to Hogwarts and didn't see it every evening anymore. George and Hermione set up a warming charm and Harry and Ginny spread out a blanket that they could all lie on.

As everyone arranged themselves, Ron tried to snuggle up next to Hermione, but she sat up and moved to opposite side and squeezed between George and Ginny. He watched her go with puppy-dog eyes that just irritated Hermione. Last time she had let him hug her he had taken it as a sign that they were going to get back together. Although she had disabused him of the notion, Ron still seemed to think that she was his. She was tired of trying to talk him out of it.

For a while they were silent until George started talking about his newest inventions that he would have out before next Christmas.

"Caroling fruit cake?" Hermione asked. "Are you sure you aren't just trying to find new ways to irritate people?"

George propped up on his elbow and grinned. "What's holiday cheer without a few pranks?"

"It's perfect, that's what," Ginny chimed in as she leaned over on Harry's chest. "Do you think I liked showing up Christmas morning striped red and white like a candy cane?"

"But that was hilarious," Ron said, grinning.

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Scratch that. You got a way to give him reindeer antlers?" She pointed a thumb in Ron's direction.

"Oi!" Ron said.

"My idea greatly outshines antlers," George said regally and then he winked. "Although thanks, Ginny, it will be duly considered."

"Oi!" Ron said again and they all laughed.

"So what is your other idea?" Harry asked.

George proudly pulled a sprig of mistletoe from his pocket.

"Oh no," Hermione muttered. "You've got to be joking."

"Well, I do run a joke shop," George quipped. "And I believe these will be just the thing for any prankster wishing to enliven the halls of Hogwarts or their deary office. Anyone who walks together underneath them will be forced to partake of a Christmas tradition!"

"Oh, dear," Hermione said again, shaking her head. "McGonagall is going to have kittens!"

Harry snorted and then Hermione realized what she had said and covered her mouth. "Oops." That was something that she had heard so many times it just slipped out. Everybody laughed again.

"So what if it's two guys?" Harry asked. "Are we talking on the lips?"

"Or," Ginny jumped in. "What if Harry got stuck under the mistletoe with Pansy?" And then she added as an afterthought. "Or anyone, really?"

"You'd have something to answer for, George," Harry agreed. "I'm a one woman sort of man."

Ginny giggled a little before saying, "You know I wouldn't have you if you weren't."

Ron made a face at his sister and best friend and then said, "Or, what if it was Malfoy and Hermione!"

Hermione's face flamed red as she imagined just that. Malfoy with his hand on the wall behind her, head tilted to the side and eyes closed. He leaned closer and Hermione shook her head to clear the memory.

"He'd hex her the second he realized she couldn't get away," Harry added to Ron's thought. "Or worse."

"No he wouldn't-" Hermione started but was cut off by Ron.

"She'd hex him," Ron said with assurance.

Hermione sighed in exasperation and Ginny watched Hermione with narrowed eyes.

"You'd have to deal with both Hermione and Ron after that sort of mess," Harry continued. "Imagine all the fallout from couples you would have to deal with."

"Or siblings!" Ginny added.

"My mistletoe wouldn't be that dense!" George pretended to cover the plant's ears.

"There is little value in something that has to be coerced out of either party," Hermione said stoutly, hoping no one would notice her change in color.

George sighed and shook his head. "Trust Hermione to be all pragmatic, but all of you are really taking the fun out of this."

They spent awhile trying to come up with solutions before the conversation trailed off to other subjects. As the night wore on the cold seeped through the ground and they all huddled closer.

"I'll grab some hot cocoa," George said at last. "Anyone want some?"

They all replied in the affirmative and then Ginny added. "Ron, would you make sure he doesn't poison our drinks."

"You wound me, sister dear," George said as he got up.

Ron shrugged and followed. "I wanted another piece of pudding anyway."

As soon as the door closed, Ginny whispered, "Are you really not going to get together with Ron again?"

Harry turned his head towards Hermione too.

Hermione sighed and looked up at the sky full of tiny flecks of stars. "No, I knew it wouldn't work out the first time. I don't know why Ron was convinced there should be a second time."

"You do always fight," Harry said at last.

"It's more like we don't care about the same things."

"Is there someone else?" Ginny asked.

Hermione couldn't help think of the last time she had seen Draco. Remembering the way it had felt to press her head against his chest and his earthy scent. She tried to shake it away but realized she had paused too long when Ginny sat up.

"I knew it!" she exclaimed. "It's Malfoy, isn't it?"

Hermione sat up in shock. "What?"

"You defend him every time we say anything about him. I saw the way your eyes got all mushy when Ron talked about you both under the mistletoe! You've got a crush on Draco Malfoy!"

Hermione immediately covered Ginny's mouth with both hands. "Shut it!"

Ginny pried off Hermione's hands. "About this? It's priceless!"

"Please tell me this is a joke," Harry said in a serious tone.

"I've told you he has changed." Hermione tried to keep the defensiveness out of her voice. "He really is a different person."

Harry sat up and stared at her, the moonlight glinting off his glasses. "Tell me, Hermione, if you both were to go back to that moment when you were being tortured on the floor of his mansion," –Hermione flinched- "Do you think he would do it differently now? Would he let you bleed out on the floor, screaming and begging for it to stop?"

The smell of her own blood, the flashes of pain again and again, Bellatrix's high pitched laugh and her demands drilled in with the beat of the curses. Hermione sat frozen as everything crashed in on her again and then she scrambled up to her feet and ran. She broke through the warming charm around the house and the tears on her face froze into stinging trails on her cheeks. She tripped over several holes she couldn't see and continued blindly until she found the apparition zone and, with barely a thought, she disapparated.

The moon peeked through the silhouetted tree tops with only the slight blue of the sky against a sea of black. She continued to run, her breath turning to foggy clouds that dissipated into the mists surrounding her. As she ran her memories continued to chase after her and then it seemed the snatchers joined the chase. She ran harder, panting, the cold air searing down her throat. Her heart hammered against her chest, pushing up against her throat until it felt like she couldn't breathe. She gasped and her face stung with thousands of icy needles. Her foot caught and she sprawled across the forest floor, stones cutting into her knees and hands. Frantically, she tried to push herself up again but her foot was caught.

Turning as best she could, she pulled her wand and waited for anyone coming for her. During the pause her hands began to pulse with a chill that ached even to her head. She was crying, the tears icing over along her face up to her ears. The darkness had given way to shadows and shadows of shadows that shifted around her. Was there someone here? She needed a steadier hand and mind. She pulled a potion from her bag and uncapped it. Her hand shook as she brought it to her mouth, spilling the dark substance across her thumb. It was practically warm compared to her hands and as she looked down at it she remembered the previous day's resolution. It had already faded with barely a day in between.

She could continue to be a slave to this thing or she could find another way. She didn't want another way. At least not all of her. She smashed the vial against the rocks. Its darkness lost in the night's darkness with only a flash of moonlight on its broken glass. She cried harder. The feeling of complete helplessness at Bellatrix's feet continued to push against her, lapping at the edges of her mind like the lake's quiet waves. She wasn't there anymore. She wasn't powerless. And yet, it felt that way. She couldn't convince herself that she was not.

How dare he? How dare Harry bring up that awful time? Was he still so blinded by hate that that was all that Draco had become? She couldn't even remember Draco from that night except his terrified face as he studied each of their faces and whispered that he wasn't sure. He couldn't be sure if it was them.

It wasn't a moment that made her loathe him. It was actually a time she had seen his human side even before New York. A boy with impossible choices. Impossible. He would have never chosen her. Would he even have chosen her now? Hermione couldn't seem to imagine it. He was kinder. But putting his life on the line for her? Circumstances had changed him to a better man but under the circumstances in that manor he would probably make the same decision again.

Surely there was something that proved that it wasn't true? That he had truly changed? Hermione searched through her memories. Saving her at the YWC? Protecting her from Ari's golf ball? New circumstances that only made him look better to those around him.

Damn Harry. She would have been happier not knowing. Or hating herself for finding out too late. Maybe this was good. Having clearer eyes.

As all her emotions finally settled down from the overwhelming cacophony that had threatened to drown her, she finally remembered how cold she was. Everything hurt. She forced her frozen fingers around her wand to perform a warming spell.

She couldn't help but long for Draco and the mutual understanding she thought they had shared. Couldn't help wishing that he wanted what she wanted. Couldn't help wanting her potions to wash away all this heavy emotion. She glanced down at the potion still spilled across the stones. She wasn't sure if she could pull herself together enough to get through another day here. Here there were still too many reminders of everything that had happened. Here she saw the old Draco. The man he still might be under layers she had not seen through.

She could magically gather it up and fix the vial. She tried to ignore the impulse but all she could think of was licking it off the rocks themselves. She raised her wand, offering a prayer to apologize for her own weak flesh.

She could go to an AA meeting. The thought came unbidden. There would be help. She didn't have to strong arm her way through this. The cathedral's bulletin had mentioned a meeting tonight.

She stared at the blackness of the potion against the dark ground. She vanished it.

Gone.

She sent a patronus to tell Harry she was fine, dis-illusioned herself, and then apparated to the cathedral.

* * *

Hey guys, last chapter in England, at least thats the plan. Soon enough things are going to kick off the beginning of the end. Hope you enjoyed the chapter!


	44. New Year's Eve

With the help of strangers, she rode out the over-riding thirst for her potions with pastries, bible passages and a impromptu race between the cathedral and the bakery.

The AA meeting was not a cure-all but it got her through that night and the people there were able to direct her to another meeting that got her through the next night. It was exhausting to live moment to moment, constantly battling with a consuming desire that she had to ignore again and again. Sometimes it was too much to think of getting through to the next day so she focused on that hour. Then the next one. She was grateful that her days were busy with visiting soup kitchens and her nights with attending dinners with her parents. She sort of liked the mindless repetition required at the soup-kitchens and, while she didn't exactly like the dinners, it was only required of her to smile as she was reintroduced and suffer through a little reminiscence before she could escape to a book in the corner.

Dinner with the Weasleys was a different matter. If anything here would tip her over the edge when it came to taking her potions again, she was sure it would be returning to the Burrow. So, when she met Harry in the hallway there, she couldn't help the tightening of her stomach during the pause that hung between them. Despite everything, he was still her friend and she wanted to keep that friendship even if he could be a little... shortsighted. He spoke first, muttering something about being glad to see she was well and how he hoped she had thought about their conversation. Hermione nodded in acknowledgment of the closest thing to an apology that she would probably get out of him. She wasn't sure what to say since she was doing well, no thanks to him, and she had thought about their conversation or, rather, what he had said before she had taken off running. Anything she wanted to say would most likely start the tension all over again between them.

The matter resolved itself like many of their past disagreements had: neither completely addressing it and both of them falling back into more or less what they had had before. Overall, she was still glad to spend this time with her friends. They essentially had been family in Hogwarts and the years after and, as such, she still loved them even with all the trouble that that entailed. Staying up late with them laughing chased away the clouds that still hung over her from Harry's words on Boxing Day and let her crash into bed late into the night without thinking overly much about reaching for a potion. Still, she was happy when she finally left her parents and the Weasleys behind. They seemed to be becoming more connected with the past and it's parts that still wanted to drag her down from where she had climbed up to breathe. Maybe when she was on more stable ground she could breathe more easily here once again, she told herself to try to chase away the guilt she felt at still wanting to return to Draco and the others even as she was with Harry and everyone.

Of course, returning to Draco did have it's own set of worries. When she didn't fall asleep right away, her brain ran the tracks of thinking similar to the ones she had had out in the forest Boxing Day night. The image of Draco standing over her parent's dead bodies had become a new regular nightmare. She wouldn't avoid Draco. She wasn't sure if she could and she certainly didn't want to. She didn't think it was necessary, either. She would just have to make sure to keep her expectations within certain boundaries just as she had learned to do with Ron and Harry. Draco had not yet proven himself to be more capable of handling her heart than Ron or even Harry. She just had to make sure to guard her heart against him and his charm that had wormed it's way into that heart. She was sure she could do that.

In any case, she wasn't sure she would have to start that reinforcement until she returned to school. Although they had agreed to meet at New Year's, neither had contacted the other about actually meeting at Daryn's New Year's Eve concert. However, as the concert became closer, Hermione couldn't help the flutter in her chest at the possibly of seeing Draco again.

The concert was held on one of the highest buildings in WiNY with sparkling paper lanterns bobbing over the artificially-warmed roof. Even with several hours until midnight, the roof had already had several magical attachments to accommodate the ever-growing group of young wizards. Hermione wandered through the crowd and attempted to hold a smile on her face as she searched for someone she knew. There were too many people and it was making her jumpy and her nerves attuned to each brush against her. She stayed towards the front for awhile, ignoring the impulse to find a quiet corner, as Daryn's band played covers and then paused to greet the crowd.

The tall one with dreads was addressing the crowd this time and, although he was more soft spoken than the other singer, the crowd still listened. He thanked the crowd for coming and made acknowledgments to certain people and then made a plug for a few of their smaller gigs. Then the singer transitioned into talking about a potential tour depending on their fan's interest and asking them to provide feedback via owl or their press table. Hermione frowned. How would Daryn balance school and a tour? He was barely managing being in the band from what she saw. It was too dark to determine how he felt about it as he stood on stage adjusting his guitar.

As the music started up again, Hermione decided that she had had enough of pretending that she was enjoying herself and started making her way to the back where it wasn't as crowded. There were tables lined along the edge of the roof with pumpkin juice and butterbeer as well as Muggle soda pop and bags of chips.

Hermione poured herself some butterbeer before wandering to the edge of the roof to overlook WiNY, still sparking from the lights that had been put up for Christmas. She stayed there for a while, just listening to the music and trying to ignore her internal chanting for silence and the ever present current of want for potions. After a certain period of this and with not even a glimpse of Draco, she was seriously considering going home just to use a book to drown it all out.

She straightened and started finishing off the butterbeer in her cup.

"Hey."

Hermione looked up to see Draco leaning against the railing next to her with a half smile. She automatically returned his smile but had to work to keep it as she was reminded of what Harry had said in England. No matter how much her heart responded to his smile, she had to remember that she couldn't trust him. No matter-

"You look really well."

She choked on her butterbeer. "Th-thank you, Draco. Ginny gave me the dress for Christmas."

He glanced down at her dress and up to her face. "That's not what I meant- I mean- you do look nice." He winced and then shook his head before starting over again. "I meant your face- you don't look tired."

Hermione blinked and then laughed. "Your compliment is that I don't look tired?"

Draco sighed and looked away. "I didn't say that. I just expected the holidays would make everything worse. They do for me."

Oh. Somehow knowing that he was worrying- thinking about her- was as good as being told she was pretty. Mostly.

"It was, but then I started to going to AA meetings," she confessed.

His half-smile returned. "Good for you." He took in the dancers around them and then pushed himself off of the railing to his full height. "Want to dance?" he asked, offering her a cupped hand.

She bit her lip and stared down at it before glancing up to his face. Part of her was screaming yes, of course she wanted to dance with this man who seemed to care about her. The another part was calling her an idiot for letting herself feel this way about him. 'It's only a dance' she told the second part and pushed down the memory of Harry's gloomy questions on Boxing Day.

Draco's hand was starting to fall when she finally placed her hand into his. "What sort of dance?" she asked.

Draco's fingers curled around hers before he glanced over the crowd and the couples grinding or swaying with their arms around each other. "Something a little more civilized."

Hermione tried to read his face. Was that a slight towards the muggle dancing? Had there always been an insult looming just below the surface of his nice words and she could just see it now because she was looking for it? Or was she reading too much into things?

Leading her with his hand, he weaved through the crowd towards the front where Hermione had been at the beginning. The tension was back in her neck and she had already mapped out several escape routes by the time he turned back to her. He placed one of her hands around his neck and cradled his hand against her upper back. The pounding of her chest changed to a different type altogether. She gripped his shoulder muscles and tried not to enjoy too much the way his hand pressed firmly against her. While she was still caught up in trying to tame her reactions, he took her into a simple dance with a step-step-back step pattern that he called the Hustle.

When she had gotten used to the pattern, she started up the conversation again. "What did you do? For Christmas?"

He pulled his mouth into an attempt at a smile that looked more like a grimace. "I went home too."

"That bad?"

Draco shook his head. "Pansy is a bit of a social pariah and Mother kept scolding me for talking to her even though Mother had a close call herself with some potions."

Hermione looked up in worry and he shrugged. "The house-elves make sure she doesn't do anything really bad without me knowing."

She jerked a little at the reminder that he still had slaves in his home. She glared at their shoes to hide the anger that rose in her.

"SPEW again?"

Glancing up, she saw Draco really smirking.

"It's S.P.E.W.," she said hotly, stopping the dance and pulling her hand off his neck.

He used his hand on her back to turn her towards him even as she tried to pull away. "Relax, Hermione."

She glared at him and then pushed at his chest to give herself more room.

He let go of her and raised both hands by his shoulders. "Relax, I'm not abusing my house-elves."

She put her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow.

"I threatened them all with socks unless they took wages."

"Just because you've indoctrinated them-"

"Almost half took the sock," Draco continued, lowering his hands to his sides. "Those that stayed are treated well."

She narrowed her eyes.

"What else do you expect me to do? Throw them out and tell them it's for their own good no matter what they want?"

"Maybe."

He chuckled and then stepped close so that he could tip her face back up with a knuckle. "Do you ever compromise?"

As she returned his gray-eyed stare, Hermione tried to ignore the blush starting in her face and remember who this man was. "Do you?"

His eyes trailed down her face. "Depends on the circumstance."

She looked away and was nearly elbowed in the face. She jerked back into Draco's arms. She looked up sheepishly but he was looking over her head even as he pulled her close. "Watch it," he said sternly to someone she couldn't see.

"Draco, it's fine. It's-" she glanced around and noticed that the crowd had thickened. They didn't even have a quarter of a meter separating them from the other dancers. She took in a panicky gasp. "It's-" When she was no longer focused on Draco, the noise of the crowd was very loud. It felt like she would collapse under the sheer volume pressing in around her.

She turned and clung onto Draco's robe front, crumpling the cloth under her fingers, as she searched for an exit.

"Hermione?" His voice rumbled against her.

"I need to get out. Now."

He checked her face and then his face flattened. "Hold on."

He pushed through the crowd, making a path with his shoulders and elbows and even shoving a few people out of the way. Hermione held onto the back of his robes and followed in the midst of angry looks and a few curses.

"Sorry," she mumbled a few times before ignoring them and closing her eyes to focus on breathing through the bursting sensation in her chest. When he stopped she opened her eyes to see the crowd still thick and bottle necked at the stairs. People slid past Hermione without giving her any space to breathe and she tried not to push at them.

"Come on." Draco tugged at her arm and headed straight for the wall of people on the stairs. "She needs the loo!" he barked. "Out of the way!"

"Draco!" she said, mortified.

He ignored her and just pulled at her arm as he shoved his way through the people on the stairs. "Move! Emergency!"

Someone made a sarcastic remark and Draco gave them the two fingered salute before pressing on.

When they finally reached the bottom of the winding stair case, they stumbled into an empty alleyway, only lit by the Christmas lights from the main streets.

Hermione scanned the darkened passageway and back to the crowds of people wandering through the street. Both were sending a crawling sensation along the back of her neck that made her reach for her wand. "Draco, I really do need the loo."

He chuckled and, when she didn't answer, squinted at her face. "You going to be sick?"

She shook her head.

"What's wrong?"

She was silent and Draco stepped close again, holding her by her shoulders, and staring at her hard. "Tell me what's wrong."

She shook her head again. Instead of making her panic like she would have thought, his grip was comforting. Having him this close made her want to huddle against and tell him everything that was wrong. That was part of what scared her. She already trusted him. Probably too much.

"Hermione?"

"Please, let's just get away from the noise."

…

Almost nobody was in the Tuneful Brew and the two of them had the outside balcony to themselves. As they huddled in the corner over their teas Draco checked his watch.

"Nearly midnight. Probably why the roof was getting so crowded."

Hermione nodded absently. "You'll miss whatever they have planned."

He shrugged. "I've had my share of glitzy parties." He raised an eyebrow. "But are you going to tell me why I'm missing Daryn's big finale?"

She looked away. "If there are a lot of people sometimes the loud noises become overwhelming."

Draco glanced up towards the crowded rooftop. "The Halloween concert?"

She nodded when he turned back. "Same thing."

"Since the war?"

Hermione hesitated before nodding again.

He looked down. "I still tip-toe down the stairs in the manor, afraid who might be around the corner. The dining room makes me too nauseous to eat. I wish my mother would just sell it but," -he smiled fondly- "not even Voldemort will drive her out of her home."

Hermione flinched but hid it by flicking one of her curls out of her face. "So what do you do?"

"I vanish food from my plate while my mother isn't looking." He smirked. "Then I just eat in the gardens after she has gone upstairs to do her toilette."

Hermione nodded, remembering when she learned how to always hold onto her wand without being obvious. For somethings a little adjustment worked but... "What about everything else?"

"The nightmares didn't stop until I moved out of the manor, if that's what you mean," he said, giving her a sidelong glance.

Ah. He did know about those, didn't he? Hermione thought. "Did they come back when you visited your home?"

He had been lazily stirring his tea when his hand jerked, pausing mid-circle, and then continued.

"Draco? What happened?"

"They got worse," he told his tea. "They're still worse."

She reached out to touch his arm and his gaze jerked towards her right forearm and stayed for several seconds before he could pull it away.

"What are they about?" she asked as a suspicion pulled at her mind.

"You. That night."

He didn't have to explain. Hermione was awoken by that nightmare most nights.

"I've had it every night since I've been in that room again."

"They're both dead," she told him. "We're not."

"That's not it," Draco responded before standing up and leaning on the fence surrounding the balcony. "It's of you. And if you even try to tell me you are past that you are a liar, and an awful one at that."

Hermione watched his silhouette against the bright lights of the rooftop celebrations. What did that even mean? He cared about her now. He regretted what happened. Did that mean he would do things differently if he had a chance? Were Harry's gloomy predictions wrong? She got up and brought her cup of tea along to keep her fingers warm as she joined Draco at the fence.

"Fine. You're right," Hermione said, watching the rooftop again. "I don't know if I'm past any of it."

He tilted his head towards her."Of course you aren't. What you went through was bloody awful." He paused, hair shifting in the breeze. "How do you not hate me?"

Surprised, she met his eyes. "I did."

It hung between them for a moment before he chuckled. "Yeah, me too."

"Do you still?"

He shrugged. "Usually only when I do something stupid."

They lapsed into silence as the crowd above continued to grow in size and noise. Hermione could still hear Daryn's band over all of that, though.

"Did you hear that his band might go on tour?"

Draco followed her gaze. "Daryn? Good for him."

Hermione frowned . "It will be in the middle of the school year. He'll miss too many classes."

Draco shrugged and shifted to lean his hip on the fence. "He can just take some time off. When does an opportunity like that come around?"

She just shook her head and ran her fingers along the edge of her cup.

He chuckled. "You haven't changed, have you? Timetables. Obsessing over grades."

She raised an eyebrow. "If you don't think school is important, what are you doing here?"

"I never said that." He leaned his elbow down on the fence too, leaning even closer to Hermione. "Just because I need it for what I want doesn't mean I will force it on others who don't need or want it."

She turned quickly at that, briefly meeting his eyes that were less than half a meter away from her. It sounded like Draco's mindset was moving farther and farther away from what he had parroted as a child. But how could she know for certain? She thought about asking him but asked another question that also burned at her. "And what do you want, Draco?"

He paused. His blonde hair back-lit by the rooftop's lights so that it shone like a halo, but his face was cast in shadows. "I want a lot of things," he said at last. "I need my education to be a Potions Healer."

"Why not Potions Master? I know you could do that."

"I wasn't interested in the politics that came from the commercial side." He turned his head a little so she could she his half-smile. "And I can't really see myself teaching first years."

She smiled in agreement. "Probably true, though you've done well at the Young Wizards Club." As he met her eyes, she felt like they pulled her closer, tilting her head towards him. She blinked. "I think I decided not to be a lawyer for similar reasons. I also needed something where I could see the direct impact on people's lives."

"You were always an empathetic person," he told her softly and she was very aware how close their bodies were. If she turned towards him she would basically be in his arms.

"I think you are one too," she said. He shifted again, and their fingers brushed, shooting a bolt up her arm. She had to stifle a gasp.

"Despite everything I've done?" he asked, searching her face.

"Of course. You don't have to be defined by what you have done in the past." It was an automatic response. She told herself that each time she started somewhere new. However, as she thought about it, she knew it was true. She knew he could be someone new. But where did forgiveness end and protecting herself start? What was she supposed to do with all these memories of the younger Draco and how was she to know he really was a different person?

"Thank you." His eyes tracked down to her lips and his free hand trailed up the back of her arm, leaving goosebumps under her cardigan as his hand moved towards the back of her head.

He meant to kiss her. She wanted him to but she also didn't want to jump into this until she was sure of him. Sure that she could trust him with her life just like she knew she could trust Harry and Ron. Sure that her life wouldn't shatter again if she trusted her heart to someone else. Was it asking too much? Maybe. But with Draco she wasn't sure if it would work any other way. Still, having him this close was making her heart pound and it would be so easy just to close her eyes and lean in. His hand trailed the rest of the way across her back until it was tangled in her hair. Her scalp sparked along the trail of his fingers as they parted her hair. Fighting the sensation, she tried to meet his eyes, but Draco was completely caught in staring at her lips.

Vaguely, she could hear people chanting a count down in the distance. She took in a deep breath to say something -she wasn't sure what- and then jumped as a firework went off. For one second she was caught in the idea of death-eaters and curses but then a second one went off and she saw it glittering the sky. She took advantage of the moment to bury her head into the crook of his neck.

She could hear him sigh before he shifted to sit on the fence and wrap both arms around her. He pulled her until she was resting on top of him.

She bit her lip guiltily as he whispered gently to her and rocked her slightly side to side. It was so pleasant to be pressed against him, feeling each hard curve of his muscles as he moved, even as the back of her mind whispered all the reasons she shouldn't and couldn't do even this. For a moment she was caught up in them and then she ignored them as she breathed in his scent. Musky shaving cream and the earthy tones of his hair, she thought. No matter what had happened before and what might happen after, she tried to concentrate on this moment and enjoy it for what it was in just this piece of time. A boy holding a girl.

"Happy New Year, Hermione," he whispered into her hair.

She turned slightly so that her forehead pressed against his warm neck. "Happy New Year, Draco."

* * *

Sorry for late upload. With the quarantine, time has become meaningless. Have I mentioned that already? lol


	45. In which Hermione returns to school

When Hermione entered the classroom the next semester, she remembered being paired with the alpha-lambda group the first day of the previous semester. She smiled a little fondly as she realized she had missed them all over the hols. Standing at the entrance of the classroom, she scanned the seats for her group. On the far side of the room she spied a bright blonde and extremely recognizable cut of hair. It made her heart beat a little faster as she remembered New Year's. Shifting her book bag a little, she resolutely marched to the front of the classroom, around the chairs, and towards him.

He had chosen a row towards the middle of the room and had saved the spot on the very edge of the row with his bag. He had had both feet propped up on the seat in front of him but sat up when he saw her. He pulled his book bag out of the chair and gestured towards it with a small smile.

Hermione returned the smile shyly and sunk down next to him. Neither said anything as she started pulling books and scrolls out of her bag. As she fitfully arranged everything on her desk, she bit her lip and tried to think of a way to start the conversation. It had been an awkward parting the night before, knowing he wanted to kiss her and not quite being able to explain to him why she didn't want that yet. Next to her, Draco shifted and their hands brushed, sending electricity crackling up her arm. She shivered and glanced up at him. He was already looking down at her and their gazes held for a moment. He was beautiful. The hard lines of his face softened by the gentle curve of his fringe and lips. His eyebrow raised ever so slightly before he started to smirk. Hermione took a fast breath in before looking away, heat rising in her neck. Was he teasing her?

"What do you think about the new potions class?" Draco asked.

She looked up to see him watching the classroom as it slowly filled up. "We're actually going to brew experimental potions with an Arithmancy grid. I tried it a little with Snape before but we didn't get very far. Just imagine the possibilities once we can actually create potion recipes." He glanced over at her, eyes alight.

Hermione smiled, glad he could mention Snape without gloom and caught up in Draco's enthusiasm. "It certainly will be fascinating," she agreed. She always loved learning, but she did not have the fire for this topic like Draco seemed to have.

He paused and frowned. "Will you have trouble... working with potions?"

Hermione shrugged and looked down. She hadn't thought about it. "I should be able to survive one class, shouldn't I?" she said as much to him as herself.

He reached over and squeezed her shoulder with a hand. She smiled, fighting an impulse to dive into his arms. Because she had always been around her dad or Harry she had always had someone who could give her a hug when she was feeling down or overwhelmed. It had felt so good to be held by Draco New Year's Eve. It had had the comfort of her father's hug with just a little spark of something else. She wanted to ignore all of the reasonable voices in her head and just...

"You'll do fine," he told her.

Her eyes shut briefly at his voice and then she smiled weakly. "Thanks, Draco."

He leaned forward, hand still on her shoulder. "Hermione..."

Her breath caught and held as she waited for him to finish his sentence.

"Well, aren't you two looking close."

Draco's eyes trailed up to the speaker behind her and his mouth shut into a thin line.

Hermione glanced back to see Shandra standing over them, a hand on her hip and her red-stained lips quirked.

Draco sighed and leaned back. "What an astute observation so early in the morning," he all but growled.

"Oh, you don't get a pass for sarcasm just because you are annoyed at me," Shandra said as she inched past both of them, jostling their legs.

Shandra's appearance put an abrupt halt to whatever mood had been growing between Hermione and Draco. It was probably a good thing, Hermione reasoned, but it didn't mean she was happy about it. Once she had sat down, Shandra started in on oblique hints about how it must have been an eventful holiday for the two of them, but Hermione and Draco both pointedly ignored her. Hermione went back to prepping her quills for the lecture, cheeks still burning. What was that she had just thought, Hermione wondered, about missing certain people? Despite their lack of enthusiasm, Shandra had developed a taste for the subject and was still speculating on their hols when Daryn arrived. Once he had settled down she quickly jumped topics to the New Year's Eve concert.

It was a welcome reprieve from Shandra's conjectures but Hermione couldn't help pitching in. "It really was a lovely concert, but are you really going to do a tour?"

Daryn leaned forward. "Everything is lining up and it seems like this might be our best chance."

"But what about school?"

Daryn shrugged. "School will be there when I am done with my tour" -he grimaced- "at least, if I can get them to defer my classes for a year or two." At Hermione's skeptical look, Daryn sighed. "They always could replace me with another guitarist if I decided not to go. It's just that..."

"You are going on that tour," Shandra said emphatically. "I don't care if I have to threaten the school president."

"But-" Hermione started and was interrupted by Draco putting a hand on her arm. Startled, she looked at him and he shook his head, mouthing the words 'let it go.' Hermione frowned but didn't finish her sentence.

"What I want to know," Shandra continued. "Is why you agreed to open for Betty and the Banshees. Only traditionalists and purebloods go see them. It's going to be such a waste of time and such a drag."

Hermione glanced at Draco. He was now glaring at the seat in front of him, his jaw visibly clenching. She reached over and squeezed one of his hands. He glanced at her, eyes still far away, and blinked several times and then shook off her hand.

"I'm fine," he said gruffly.

She sat back and let him be, glad for the distraction when John dashed to their row and nearly dived across all of them for the last open seat.

He just made it to his chair when the instructor tapped on his podium for silence so that he could begin the class. Hermione chanced another glance at Draco, but he was pulling out his own scroll and hadn't looked at her again. She sighed and tapped her quill to free it of the first blot.

It was not much different than the first day of the first semester: she was still taking more notes than the rest of the group and she was still watching Draco, but for different reasons.

They had just finished their first potions class and Hermione had never seen him so involved in schoolwork. He had been leaning forward the whole class, cramming notes onto his scroll, and had even raised his hand a few times.

It was a side that Hermione knew was there but was still surprised by.

He glanced over and caught her staring.

She was about to make up an excuse when he spoke first.

"We should find a place other than the school to brew our potion," he told her. "The school's rooftop is going to be very crowded and the city's electricity will dim its magic anyway."

Hermione shrugged. "I think everybody lives in the middle of the city so we might be out of luck."

Draco turned to address the rest of the group. "Any of you know places that would be good for brewing potions? Magic parks, things of that sort?"

They were all shaking their heads when John stopped. "Wait, Hermione, didn't your friend have a forest? With the mushrooms?" John grinned

"No, Mooncalf feces," Daryn corrected, smiling a little.

"Really, guys? Still?" Hermione groaned. She had conveniently forgotten that place and had been trying to block out that night too. She didn't want to go back.

"Forest?" Draco perked up. "You have access to a forest that still has Mooncalves?"

"Maybe," Hermione wheedled, feeling like she had already lost when she caught sight of Draco's eyebrows and mouth pulled up in anticipation. "I guess I could ask Luna."

Draco grinned, turning his already handsome face into something heart-stopping. He grabbed her hand, his bigger hand engulfing hers in its gentle grip, each warm finger splayed across the back of her hand. "Mooncalves are only attracted to areas where the moonlight is purest. It will be perfect for our potion."

She smiled weakly and the touch of his hand haunted her the rest of the day. In spare moments her mind would replay how it had felt, but each time she was also jabbed by the guilt of letting him when she wasn't willing or ready for the sort of relationship that came with hand holding and whatever else was going on between them. It was enough to make her bury her face into her hands in frustration.

That night Hermione explained her group's needs to Luna and Luna brought back an answer in the affirmative by the end of the week. Hermione had mixed feeling as she thanked Luna. In fact, the only thing she looked forward to was that she would be able to relay that answer to Draco personally when they met up to volunteer at the YWC.

Upon hearing the news, his face broke into a genuine smile and he grabbed her by the shoulders. "I could kiss Luna right now. We are going to have the best potion."

"I'm pretty sure she is taken," Hermione said, feeling the heat rise in her cheeks.

He cocked his head. "True." He let go of her shoulders. "Then tell her I offer her my services as a chaperone when needed."

"Speaking of," -Hermione dug into her bag to pull out a large silver pendant- "what is this?"

"Looks like an eagle catching a fish," he said, which it did, and then he smirked. "But if you squint at it really hard it becomes the prime minister." Which it didn't.

She rolled her eyes and his ridiculous attempt at a joke. "Why would Rolf give it to Luna?"

Draco plucked it from her hand and examined it as he rotated it. "Hmm... looks like an antique... probably a brooch at one point."

"So what does she do with it? He seemed to think it was important but then they got distracted by..." -Hermione looked away- "kissing. Luna is going to his parents' again this weekend and isn't sure what to do with it."

Draco ran a finger along the tiny yellow sapphires in the fish scales. "Was it their first kiss?"

"Draco!" Hermione's cheeks burned. She couldn't help wondering where his mind was going with that question.

He raised an eyebrow and waited for a response.

"Yes," she answered, not meeting his eyes. Luna had been a little too informative on that point. Remembering that was just making her blush more.

"Then, as long as Rolf has an eagle in his family crest, it might have been a half-arsed pinning ceremony." At Hermione's raised eyebrow he elaborated, "Engaged to be engaged. She would wear it somehow and return the gift in like manner if she wants to enter into that stage. They aren't expected to be exclusive until the engagement but it's..."

"The pinning is like a promise ring," Shandra supplied as she walked up from the floo. "Who is doing something so archaic?"

Hermione straightened. "My friend is dating a pureblood."

Shandra's upper lip curled. "Give her my apologies."

"Luna is a pureblood too. They are both great people," Hermione said sharply.

Shandra blinked. "Luna - as in the girl that dressed up as a pirate for your birthday?"

Hermione gave a hesitant affirmative.

"I think she is totally adorable," Shandra gushed, clasping her hands in front of her. "Jordan told me about her patriotic outfit and I can't believe how creative it was!"

Hermione glanced over at Draco who shrugged.

"She should start a new wizard line of clothing," Shandra was saying. "We need something other than matronly Victorian dress-robes or completely muggle prom dresses as options."

Maybe Shandra just needed to warm up to someone first in order to accept them as a pureblood? Hermione wondered. She had fully expected for Shandra to start insulting Luna but instead the new knowledge seemed to have no bearing on Shandra's opinion of her.

Hermione smiled at Draco to share these thoughts but her smile dropped when she saw how dark his face looked. "Draco?"

He looked up and shook his head. "Let's go, the ankle-biters are waiting."

She nodded and they started past the receptionist to the room of children.

"Hey guys, wait a sec," she said, blowing a pink bubblegum bubble and waving at all of them to stop.

Draco raised an eyebrow.

The receptionist shuffled through some papers. "So, one of the moms went grade-A crazy after she heard about what happened last year. You know," she gestured towards Hermione. "With you bleeding all over the place and her kid falling off a roof."

Draco sighed. "He didn't fall off the roof."

"Yeah, well, anyways... she has a petition demanding that we run background checks on all of our volunteers."

Hermione was still watching the receptionist but felt Draco's shoulders tense beside her.

"I refuse," he said.

The receptionist laughed and spun her tie around her finger. "It's kinda mandatory now, Draco."

"Then I quit," he said without emotion.

"Isn't that an overreaction?" Shandra asked, putting her hand on his shoulder. He shrugged it off.

Hermione bit her lip and glanced up at his blank face. It wasn't an overreaction. Not only was he an ex-deatheater but he had also been arrested in the States. "Do you want to at least tell Ari?" she asked quietly.

His lips thinned and he shook his head. "Later. Look after him while he is here, would you?"

She nodded.

He clasped where her neck and shoulder met and gave it a comforting squeeze. "Thank you." He turned and left through the floo.

Hermione watched him disappear into the fireplace, a small stone of dread dropping into her stomach. She hadn't expected her bad decisions that rainy day to come back to affect Draco and the guilt wasn't comfortable to sit with.

"What was that all about?" Shandra asked.

Hermione shook her head. "He doesn't like to talk about it."

Shandra pressed but Hermione didn't elaborate. The rest of the day at YWC was subdued without Draco's posturing and his young fans' girly exclamations. Hermione wasn't sure if she wanted to come back now that Draco was gone but then she saw Ari huddled over a muggle book, frowning intently, and knew she couldn't leave. She had a promise and duties to keep.

A week after that Luna finally had a chance to give all of them a tour of the facility that they would have access to in the forest. They all met at the school and Luna passed out port-keys that were keyed to a room of the facility. One by one they transported with Rolf going first and Luna going last. When Hermione landed, she stumbled forward and hit a soft wall. She looked up to see that all the walls had been padded and appeared to have once been white, although now the bottom halves were dingy-brown. The second thing she noticed was how cold it was. She shivered and rubbed her arms, glad that Luna had encouraged them to wear full winter gear.  
Luna herself was wearing a beanie that had a lumpy bulge under it that Hermione was pretty sure was Rolf's pendant. Luna had been a bit reluctant about wearing it once Hermione explained what it was, muttering about Worflelads and promises. Luna had gotten distracted before Hermione had gotten a straight answer out of her.

"No warming spells," Rolf reminded them.

"No electricity or magic allowed. I can see why nobody is dying to use this place right now," Shandra said, her breath visibly ghosting the air.

"I vote we come here in the daytime," John said. "It's probably gonna be way colder at night."

Daryn laughed. "John, we have to brew the potion in moonlight."

"Oh." John's face fell. "This is gonna suck."

"We can teach you muggle techniques if you need help," Luna said. "We have a wood-burning furnace and hand warmers are very nice." She pulled a plastic square package out of her pocket to demonstrate.

"Aw." Shandra clasped her gloved hands in front of her. "You are so sweet."

Once situated, they all were led to the center room which was reserved for minor spell-work such as potions. Luna had explained that potions worked with natural magic already inherent in the ingredients and didn't require as much direct spell-work as other forms of magic. This meant that, because of their smaller magical footprint, potions were less restricted here. Once Luna had finished her tour of the potions lab, Draco immediately started examining the scales and measuring devices they would be allowed to use while they were there.

"Not bad," he muttered.

"You gonna beg to work for them so you can play with the pretty toys?" Shandra asked.

Draco glanced up before returning to examining the workspace. "Shut it, Shandra."

She walked over and leaned on the lab table, wrapping her scarf tighter around her neck. "You didn't come to the YWC yesterday. Are you really not going to go because of a measly background check?"

Hermione, who had only been half listening, couldn't help checking Draco's reaction, but his head was down, arranging what looked like thimbles.

"Draco?" Shandra asked, leaning to the side to see his face.

"Hey, Shandra," Hermione said loudly, motioning her over. "Come take a look at this."

Shandra looked between Hermione and Draco, who was still pointedly ignoring her. "Yeah, what is it?" Shandra asked as she pushed off the table and walked towards Hermione. Hermione had been standing at the edge of the room and beckoned for Shandra to follow her as she entered another room. This one was full of sofas facing a large window. "Wow," Shandra said, stepping into the room. "It's beautiful."

Hermione had chosen the room at random but couldn't help agree with Shandra. The snow had banked around the lower edges of the window, pristine and edged with intricate ice lattices. The rest of the window was full of evergreen trees whose snow-laden boughs swayed in the wind.

"It's so still and peaceful," Shandra said as she walked closer to the window.

And too quiet, Hermione thought to herself, remembering her other night in this forest. Maybe having a wall between her and it would make it easier to get through these potion-making nights. She hoped that that was the case. She hoped that she had gotten through the worst of things last semester and now this semester would go more smoothly. Hermione hugged herself and tried to block out her lingering doubts.


	46. In which relationships are discussed

This semester did seem to be going easier than the last one. It finally wasn't as difficult to avoid thinking about potions. She found the fast-paced routine of her classes gave her less time to think in general and was probably part of what had helped her resist her addiction. Working off of that theory, she threw herself a little more into schoolwork and extracurriculars. She wasn't home until late every night of the week and she had developed several meditations that helped her fall asleep once she did get to bed.

The meditations had been her therapist's idea. His theory was that she unconsciously wouldn't let herself relax enough to sleep because that also meant her nightmares would come. To address that fear, she had to confront the reoccurring dreams every night before she slept. Hermione could admit that she was afraid. She hated jolting up awake, her heart racing, and having to relive some of the worst moments of her life over and over again. It was the reason she had started taking Dreamless Sleep potions. However, her therapist's meditations had initially sounded a tad too pseudoscience-y to Hermione and she only started them as a desperate grasp for anything that would help her with the awful sleepless and restless nights.

The first few times, her therapist had led her through the scenarios, patiently waiting as she had sobbed or panicked. The more times she had done it, the less intense the emotions had been until they became manageable aches instead of raw wounds. Now she had a basic pattern that played out more or less each time in her head as she mentally prepared for bed. In her nightmare of being tortured, she had to go in and save herself. In her mind, it was easy enough to hex Bellatrix, Lucius and even Narcissa but she never knew what to do about Draco. The first time she had stared at him, waiting for him to do something one way or the other. He had stared back with big scared eyes and, when she moved towards him, ducked behind one of the huge, overstuffed chairs. She had turned towards her other self then, bending down to care for her younger self's wounds. She kept an eye on him but he did not move when she pulled herself onto her shoulder or when she helped herself down to the dungeon to rescue her friends. For all she knew, he had stayed behind that chair the whole time. When it came to her nightmare of him killing her parents, she usually put him in a full-body bind and then pulled the death-eater tattoo off his arm like a patterned band-aid before throwing the writhing knotted snake into the fire. With it gone, the cloak and mask would disappear and he would shrivel down into his twelve year old self. It wasn't a perfect system and it took longer than her potion routine but it was almost as effective and without the side effects so she continued to put aside the time to do it. Each time she was annoyed at the time-commitment or didn't feel like facing her dreams, she reminded herself how it had felt not to have her magic when a little boy's life relied on it. The guilt was enough at first and gradually the benefits, such as a clearer mind that came from more sleep, pushed her to continue.

Because she was sleeping better, she had been able to wake up in time to call Harry more. However, he wasn't home very often - the snakeheads scattered so quickly after each crime that he was having as much difficulty tracking them as he would herding cats. Thus, more often than not, Hermione only spoke to Ginny when she called. She had come to enjoy the girl talk with Ginny but Hermione still felt a pang of loneliness whenever she heard Harry's message on the voicemail.

"So," Ginny probed the next Saturday. "When will we hear wedding bells? Malfoy expressed his undying love yet?"

Hermione rolled her eyes. Ginny might have thought it was a joke but it hit a little too close for Hermione, even if it had been just a barely-avoided kiss. "Keep your freckled nose to yourself. Do you want me to start hassling you about Harry?"

There was a sigh on the other end. Then, after a pause, Ginny asked, "So it really is over between you and Ron?"

"Has he been planning our wedding again?"

"No, he's just been sullen ever since you left. You weren't exactly subtle about avoiding him..." -Ginny trailed off for a moment- "but, how did you know?" Her tone had gone more serious. "Did you just stop loving him or was it a bunch of little things that were just too much for the love you had?"

"Is this about Harry?"

There was silence on the other end.

Hermione wrapped the phone cord around her finger as she waited. "Ginny?"

"He thinks I always need protection. It feels like he is looking down on me!"

"Did he stick another bodyguard on you?" Hermione guessed, reaching with a toe to snag one of a kitchen chair's legs and drag it towards her. It sounded like this was going to be a long conversation.

"He explained that... it's just now he is afraid of me staying at Grimmauld by myself and insists Kreacher has to stay here with me." Ginny continued in a lower tone, "No one is happy about that."

Hermione sat down into the chair and thought for a moment. "Have you talked about this?"

"He says all the purebloods are being warned to do the same because the Snakeheads are attacking those they deem as blood-traitors."

"It sounds like a legitimate reason."

"Yeah, but he isn't forcing it on anyone else."

Hermione could see that Ginny needed to talk this out so she settled into the chair. The discussion circled several times with Hermione trying to explain things from Harry's perspective and Ginny angrily shooting her explanations down. It seemed Ginny couldn't let go of the fact that Harry had a (maybe over)protective streak.

"Ginny," Hermione finally said. "It's part of him. You can either let him go or accept it. I don't know if there is anything else to do."

"What if I can't do either," came Ginny's subdued voice from the other end. "What if it will break me to let him go and it will destroy me to be with a man who can't respect who I am?"

"There is always a choice," Hermione said quietly. "It isn't the end of the world to be heart-broken and alone. I've been there and you do get over it, even if it doesn't seem like it is possible."

Ginny breathed out. "Ron? Hermione, I am so sorry."

"I was strong enough." Hermione waved a hand Ginny couldn't see but it was mostly to try to keep the memories away. "If it comes down to it, you are strong enough too and you will not be alone." Still, Hermione had seen Harry under extreme circumstances in the war and how he had treated her. She remembered Harry stumbling over questions as he tried to figure out if Ginny was even interested in marriage yet. "Are you really sure this is about him?" Hermione asked. "Are you sure you aren't just scared? Maybe there is a certain point you just have to jump and then you learn if the relationship will fly or fail." She had jumped with Ron and it had failed but at least she had jumped instead of always hovering and always wondering. Maybe it wasn't jumping the first time that took courage, but the second time when you knew what it was like to hit the ground.

"Scared?" Ginny asked. "What do you think I'm scared of?"

"I don't know, Ginny," Hermione sighed. Or, rather, she didn't know what to say more than she already had. She was glad the conversation ended shortly thereafter. It had made her think of her own relationship struggles and it was just too exhausting to think and overthink everything that was going on yet again.

…

The potion was the main project for the semester, but it was a rather large undertaking. Luna's work had agreed to let two other groups use the same facility and so Hermione's group decided to go early and set things up for the following nights. It would be one of the few times they would all be there as a group as they had decided that, in order to use all the moonlight they could, they would take shifts during nights with a close-to-full moon. Shandra and John had taken the first shift and Draco and Hermione were to take the second. Daryn had been assigned potion prep work and more of the actual write up than the rest of them. It wasn't spoken out loud, but they had chosen this set up so Daryn could continue his music and John wouldn't be on a shift by himself. Hermione really did like John but he wasn't the type she would trust to tend a semester-long potion by himself. Not that she had had that sort of confidence with Harry or Ron at Hogwarts. On the other hand, she could have trusted Draco but was guiltily elated that she had an excuse to spend time with him that wouldn't be seen as date-like activities.

Draco had become the lead on this project and had quickly handed out Arithmancy grids and potion timetables. As he took charge again that evening, Hermione bit her lip and tried not to show that she thought his bossy behavior a little sexy. When she reviewed his plans, Hermione designed a log to keep track of hours spent on the potion and in what kind of moonlight. It made her feel even more smug when he seemed grateful for her addition. The first part of their meeting was mostly organizing the group's efforts and making sure everyone was on the same page. Once they were talked out, everyone stayed for a little longer to prep the nonperishable potion items. Draco and Hermione stood on the same side of the lab table and fell into conversation during the more mindless tasks of the preparation.

"Luna made Rolf a tie pin," Hermione said to Draco as she ground beetle exoskeletons under a pestle.

"As her pinning gift?"

She nodded. "Apparently her crest has Bernif Scramblers on it."

Draco lifted an eyebrow, looking up briefly from the bunches of herbs he was tying together to dry.

"They look like bees with really long antennae, or the pin does. And they are pink."

He snorted. "He knows what he is getting into, at least. Pass me those scissors, would you?"

She handed him the pair. "It looks about as ridiculous on his bow tie as his eagle does in Luna's hair."

He smirked and cut off a piece of twine. "They don't have to wear it all the time."

Hermione nodded. Although Luna had made Rolf a pin, it still appeared she was hesitant about wearing it openly. However, whenever Hermione had the time to ask any questions about it Luna always seemed to be rushing off somewhere and vice versa.

"Has he talked to her parents yet for permission to court her?"

"Only her father is alive," Hermione said as she started pouring powdered beetles into a jar. "Is it an important part of the courtship?"

He shrugged. "Usually it is a formality as the parents probably planned the match, but, at least traditionally, it would be necessary in his case to gain approval from both of their parents."

She watched him for a moment as he deftly tied a bow around another herb bunch. If he courted her, would he ask his parents? Would he ask hers? She remembered the image of him in a mask behind her parents' couch. Shaking her head, she returned to her beetles and their conversation lulled for awhile.

"Professor Spinder must hate us to pick a type of potion that only can be brewed at night," John grumbled as he rubbed oil into their cauldron to season it.

"What would you have rather done?" Draco said, raising an eyebrow. "The Spring Equinox or the meteor-shower potion?" He smirked. "Maybe the potion that has to be brewed during a lunar eclipse with Orion's belt in the eastern sky?"

Hermione rolled her eyes as she cleaned off her hands. She was sure there was an easier special-case potion but was too tired to think of it.

"Well, I think it's a great idea because then we got to find this place!" Shandra said. "I just wish we had known about it before Christmas because then I could have taken my Christmas picture here. The scenery is perfect."

Daryn nodded as he labeled the jars they had filled. "The snow actually looks nice here as opposed to the gray stuff in the city that just takes space in parking lots."

Hermione didn't drive a car but had seen exactly what Daryn was talking about and laughed. "I had kind of expected it to look like those Christmas cards all winter," she confessed.

"Too many cars," he said. "It only looks nice right after a snowfall and then you can't even enjoy it because you are worried about driving in it."

"If only we could magic it all away," Hermione said as she cleaned off her mortar and pestle.

Daryn rolled his eyes. "I sometimes wish I could. Going around altering memories seems easier than dealing with all this stupid snow."

"What do you guys plan on doing for Valentine's Day?" Shandra asked as she wiped down the table. "The weather report says it still is going to be snowy then."

Daryn shrugged. "We've found a building big enough for everyone but it is Muggle and so we are having to figure a way to make sure everyone at the event is Wizard. It's a bit of a headache, really, but I'm done with performing outside in this cold."

Their conversation continued as everyone cleaned up and headed towards the port-key room. Hermione made to follow but Draco caught her jacket sleeve.

She looked at him and he wrung the towel he was still holding between his hands. "You know the Sikh festival that Harjeet was talking about preparing for at the last AA meeting?"

Hermione nodded. Harjeet had she would be making a lot of laddu beforehand.

"Well, I'm going to help out at the shop for part of it but the other part... do you want to go with me?"

A date. She was pretty sure he was asking her on a date. She bit her lip to keep herself from grinning stupidly. "It sounds great. I could help out at the shop if they need it," she said before she could overthink it and the fact that she still wasn't sure if she was ready for the progression of the relationship to date-like activities.

Draco nodded, setting the towel down. "I think it would be a good chance for Ari to get some exposure beyond the European Pureblood sphere his father is so focused on."

Hermione bit her lip harder. She had nothing against Ari. She liked Ari but now it didn't sound so much like a date anymore. She suppressed a sigh and exchanged good-byes with Draco before leaving to port-key herself home.

...

The following Sunday morning an unexpected person picked up the phone at the Grimmauld Place.

"Harry? Where's Ginny?" Hermione said and then realized who she was speaking with. "Harry! Are you okay? Have you caught anyone? Is Ron okay?"

"Morning, Hermione," Harry answered dryly.

"Luna!," Hermione called to her friend who was just then padding down the hallway in mismatched socks. "Harry is back!" Luna nodded and Hermione continued, addressing Harry, "What has kept you so busy? Ginny has been rather vague."

"The Snakeheads have decided to start recruiting in Spain and Germany. It's been a mess dealing with all the magical and Muggle red tape just to make sure we are in our jurisdiction," Harry grumbled.

"Has anyone joined their cause? Is anyone hurt?"

"Not openly. For the most part the Purebloods have known how to defend themselves so we haven't had any bad injuries. Well, we didn't until they hopped continents to Tangier." Harry let out a gusty sigh. "I don't think they took the threat as seriously and now we've got someone in the hospital. The healers don't seem to know anything about the hex except that it is part of the dark arts."

Hermione swallowed.

"Tangier?" Luna asked as she pulled open the fridge. "Did you known that Ari's mother is from Morocco?"

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "How do you know that?"

"I asked."

Of course. With Luna, it really was that simple. But that introduced another worry. "Harry, do you know who was hexed?" Were they related to Ari?

"Kevin Entwhistle- one of my men. He had to take on too many of the Snakeheads because the others were not prepared." Harry sounded bitter.

Hermione wondered again why he had taken this job when he had barely tolerated the war. Of course, he had always seemed to take a head long sprint towards danger as long as it was only himself involved. "Is this when you pushed Ginny to take more precautions?" she asked.

"She complained to you about that too?" his tone was a little dismissive.

"Harry, you've got to start listening to her. She thinks you are pushing all of this on her because you don't believe she is capable of handling herself."

"I don't want her to get hurt," he said sharply. "I've had enough people around me get hurt."

Hermione sighed. "You are hurting her this way too. There are other ways to hurt than being wounded. You of all people should understand that."

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone. "What should I do?"

"Trust her. Give her the facts and let her make her own decisions about how to protect herself."

"I don't know if I can," Harry's voice was tight and gruff.

"Then you might not get the chance to protect her."

There was another pause.

"Harry? Is that Hermione?" Ginny asked from somewhere barely within the phone's microphone range. "Ron came too."

"Don't let us keep you," Ron said. "You must be so busy with all your new American friends and that very special friend. Tell him hello from me."

"What's the matter with you, Ron?" Ginny asked. "I told you to be civil."

"No, you told me to stop hanging on her because she has moved on with some American bloke."

Hermione had a sudden and strong desire to hang up the phone.

"American bloke?" Luna asked. "What-"

"Luna," Hermione said very loudly. "Why don't you tell them about your American bloke?" She covered the phone piece and then whispered. "Don't say anything about Draco!"

Luna nodded and then looked down. "I don't actually want it known that I'm being courted."

"Courted?" Ginny asked. "Hermione said everyone over there is very modern and Muggle. I didn't realize any of them knew how to court!"

Luna tugged on a piece of her blonde hair. "My father didn't want me seeing any Americans."

"That's a tad odd," Harry said.

"It's the distance," Luna explained. "He's afraid I won't visit and he is already lonely without my mother."

"Oh, of course not, Luna!" Ginny said. "We promise we won't tell anyone. Especially your father!"

Luna nodded, the crease in her eyebrows easing. "Thank you, you are truly good friends to me."

Hermione nodded, feeling a little guilty for bringing it up but relieved at the change of topic.

The conversation continued and then Ginny changed topics again. "Guess what, guys. My brother has officially made true Auror status! They were on this duty-"

"Wait, let me tell it," Ron interrupted.

Harry sighed. "If you tell it, it's going to take all day."

"The details are important."

"He tracked a Snakehead all the way to their next target and led the raid against them!" Ginny finished.

"Ginny! I was going to tell it!"

"Harry is right, you take too long."

Ron grumbled and Hermione couldn't help smiling. It reminded her of the three of them after a Quidditch game, the bickering and reveling about each play. As they all talked, Luna pulled out some breakfast and Hermione and Luna ate with the phone between them.

* * *

Sorry I missed last week and am late this week too. I've been busy trying to finish some projects and it completely slipped my mind. Hope you enjoy them!


	47. Magic Potions Time in the Moonlight

During the following week, Hermione continued her hectic schedule of schoolwork and wondered if it was even necessary to continue her therapy and AA meetings. She needed all the time she could get for schoolwork and she had managed the first few steps and hadn't really craved a potion in weeks. In fact, the next full moon Hermione decided to skip her usual AA meeting to pull a very late night in the lab with Draco so they could use all the full moon's light they could get.

The other two groups had the same idea and they all worked side by side until about one in the morning when a light snow storm came through. The other groups scrambled to the outer rooms to watch the snow dust across the unmarred landscape. Hermione paused to stare up through the skylights to watch the snow flit past the glinting stars and round heavy moon.

Draco glanced up from his cutting board. "Not going to watch with them?"

As she tilted her head even farther back, her mouth thinned. "No."

"Isn't this your first real winter since Hogwarts?"

"Doesn't mean I'm dying to see snow." It was pretty, of course, but what she really wasn't dying to see was the dark forest that sat just past the pretty white flakes.

When the storm passed the rest of the groups came back in, chatting and shivering, and began to pack up. There was a chorus of yawns which Hermione couldn't help joining into. Draco gave her annoyed look before yawning himself and then looked even more disgruntled.

"We don't have to stay the whole night," she said. "We've made some good progress."

He shook his head. "The monkshood's magical properties will best be brought out under full moonlight."

The other groups finished cleaning their stations, put their potions on stasis, and started filing out. Gradually the chatter died away and left silence in its place. She stifled another yawn and waited for Draco to look irritated again.

Instead, he stopped and rubbed his eye with the back of his hand. "I'm going to go clear snow from the skylight."

"Luna said that they kept some outdoor brooms in the supplies room."

He set down his knife and tucked his wand into his jacket. "Coming? The cold would wake you up."

Hermione shook her head even as the reminder pulled another yawn from her.

He raised an eyebrow.

"I hate flying," she admitted, glancing down at her pestle.

"We'll be on a broom for maybe thirty seconds," he said, a smirk starting. "You can't survive being on a broom for that long?"

Frowning, she narrowed her eyes at him. "You can't cajole me into this. Besides, it's not just that."

The semi-smirk still on his face, he sat down on a stool, rested his chin a hand, and raised an eyebrow.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "It's the forest."

When Draco frowned she knew he didn't understand.

She sighed and looked up towards the rafters. "You know I was on the run for most of our seventh year and a lot of it was spent in Dean's forest." Her eyes traced the wood planks, trying not to, but still remembering. "I would stand guard, convinced each rustle was someone who had finally found us. That my spells had failed." She blinked away tears that had started to form and glanced sideways at Draco, who had sat up straight. Under his gaze, she didn't think it sounded like much. She hurried to try to convey how it had felt. "That Horcrux made everything worse. When I wore it I was convinced Ron leaving was my fault. That he hated me and that Harry might hate me too because of it. Even without it on I knew that we only had one wand between us and that if we were ever separated it would be near impossible for me to find Harry again. I see those woods and all I can think about is..." She stopped and wiped at her cheeks. It still sounded stupid.

Draco cocked his head to the side. "Being alone and hunted," he finished for her.

Hermione made a face halfway between a grimace and a smile.

He nodded before standing again. He briefly patted her shoulder before saying, "Ron's a right wanker but I think you've finally figured that one out." He found his broom and a non-magical broom and soon she heard the bristles against the glass as he swept away snow from the roof.

She sighed and rested her face in her hands. Why had she told him that? She felt like an idiot now, just spewing out her life at him. What did he think of her? Did he think she was weak for jumping at shadows? She had mostly shook off these feelings by the time he came back inside. However, she had a whole other problem to deal with when he did. He entered the room with his blonde hair windswept around his beanie and cheeks reddened from the wind and Hermione's mind decided to admire the grace with which he carried his brooms and dusted off his jacket. Feeling her blush, she quickly bent her head to pay special attention to counting out her dragon teeth and noting the weight.

He came to stand right beside her and pulled the Arithmancy grid he had drafted closer towards him.

"The most crucial part to get done in full moonlight will be the beginning of the third phase when the nightshades are supposed to react with the dragon teeth." He squinted up and ran a finger along his bottom lip. "As long as we stay at this table the moonlight should still reach our potion at that point." Several pieces of fringe had fallen from where he had pushed them back and now hung over his forehead. She was staring at those when she realized he was still talking about the potion, verbally calculating angles of moonlight and its effect on the magical signature of the ingredients. She bit her lip and wondered if he had always been this smart. When Harry had seemed to know more than she had it had just been frustrating, but when Draco demonstrated that he was at least on the same playing field as she was... well, it had the same effect as his little tuft of messy blonde hair and his long fingers as they moved along the grid he had drawn. Being attracted to his intelligence made sense, it was one of the disparities between her and Ron that finally broke her relationship. However, being attracted to Draco's fingers seemed... nonsensical? Hermione shook her head and scribbled a couple numbers down. Maybe everything was attractive at this point. Maybe she loved him so she loved the way he drew an Arithmancy grid. Or maybe she loved him because of how he drew Arithmancy grids? Love was still something she knew so little about. When did that spark between people become love and not just friendship or lust? All she had to go on was her mother's very clinical explanation of mutual goals and to look beyond infatuation. That had been back when she had been asking about her crush on Ron. Would her mother say anything different if she asked this time around? Her mind caught up on this line, Hermione finally realized that she was completely alone with Draco in a potions lab only lit by moon and fire light. She glanced at his sharp-boned face lit by the flickering warm fire and stared at his thin lips as he mouthed calculations. What would it feel like to kiss those lips? How did Draco kiss? Her heart thrummed and seemed to be swelling against her rib-cage, making it feel like it was the only thing holding her down and grounded. She took in a quick gasp to try to breathe again.

"Th-the dragon's teeth should be put in a little sooner," Hermione said, reaching to pick up her quill again. "The nightshade root has a faster reaction time in stronger moonlight," They were both wearing finger-less gloves and his fingers brushed against hers as he reached to hand her the quill. Her hand twitched reflexively but she ignored it and started making calculations on the side of the paper. "The nightshades will only need seven and a half minutes while the dragon's teeth will need twelve and a quarter, given that five teeth are three and a tenth ounces."

He leaned over her shoulder and then reached with one hand to turn the paper so he could read it better, essentially wrapping his arm around her. Hermione froze in place as he made a few notes of his own. Every time his chest brushed against her back she could feel it shift each layer of clothing against her back and it sent a rough tingle along her raw nerves. Each time it took her several seconds before she could force her breath to normalize. She shook her head and tried to focus on the potion. This was probably a bad idea. Now that they were alone she was so attuned to his every move that she felt like she would burst the next time she felt his breath stir her hair.

"We should just put the nightshade into the potion later," he murmured and she shivered a little at the puff of air across her hair. "The dragon teeth would" -he paused and she turned her head a little to meet his eyes. Their eyes locked and his pause turned even longer as his eyes widened a little. He swallowed-" w-would mess with the magical interaction of the beetle powder and..." -he stared at her for a moment before blinking- "monkshood."

Hermione licked her bottom lip and his eyes tracked the motion. She quickly pulled her tongue back into her mouth. "It'll just add four and a quarter minutes to the brew time," she said faintly.

He nodded and swayed towards her a little before shaking his head. "Right." He cleared his throat. "It's getting late. We should take turns brewing solo so the other can rest. That way we're fresh for the potion brewing."

She felt a pang of sadness followed by the more logical part of her relieved that she wasn't trapping herself into a potentially comprising situation of two tired people with their guards down. She nodded. "I can get you once I've finished with the monkshood," she said.

He took a step back from her and Hermione couldn't help shivering as the cold air came rushing back in.

The only warm room was the potion lab so he pulled a sofa into the room and curled up under a few blankets. Hermione admired his back from across the room and then tucked her head to start removing the flowers of the monkshood. She wasn't happy about losing her potion partner but was rather tired herself and was looking forward to her turn on the sofa. However, she could manage being tired. Even with the better sleep she had been getting, she was still woken up every hour or two by a nightmare. Being tired had just become the status quo now.

She continued with the potion until she added the monkshood and the potion had successfully turned the sallow yellow of the third stage. She could have continued but assumed Draco would want to oversee the next part of the potion. Yawning, she pressed the mistletoe berries with the back of her knife and set them to drain before putting the potion on stasis.

She made her way between the lab tables to the far side of the room where Draco was sleeping. His head was propped against the chair arm and the only thing visible from underneath the blankets was his tousled blonde hair.

"Draco?"

He mumbled something and Hermione leaned closer to hear it.

"Are you awake?"

She was on the ground with him on top of her before she realized what had happened. He grabbed her throat and Hermione clutched at his arm with both hands. He grabbed one of her arms with his free hand and held it over her head, squeezing so hard, she was sure there would be indents the size of his fingers. She tried to say his name but it got caught in her throat as she gasped for air. Struggling to get out from underneath him, her legs got tangled in the blanket between them, and then she had to stop to force her breaths again. His grip was only getting tighter on her arm and her neck.

Letting go of her hand, he reached behind him and pulled out his wand. When his arm arched close enough towards her she grabbed his wrist. He quickly shook her off but it was enough to distract him from holding her throat and she took in a deep breath even though it hurt. "Draco!" she forced out but her voice was hoarse. His hand closed over her throat again, tightening again. He hadn't heard her; it hadn't gotten through. Her pulse was pounding in her ears and her chest was squeezing up into her throat. She swung a wild fist and it glanced across the side of his face and over his eye.

His head turned with the blow and then growled. "Won't let you hurt her."

He raised his wand up again but Hermione jerked up and grabbed his wand-hand with both of hers before pushing it down and backwards enough that it pointed at Draco. She whispered a hurried, "Reinnervate."

His hand squeezed a little harder and then slacked. He blinked a couple times down at her and then frowned. "Hermione?" His eyes widened and he scrambled off her. "Merlin's bloody socks."

She rubbed her throat and just focused on breathing again through the pain. She tried to say 'I'm fine' but only the second word came out in a coarse whisper. Wincing, she pushed herself up into a sitting position and tried to swallow.

"I didn't think I'd actually fall asleep or I would've... shite." He reached out to touch her and then stopped abruptly, his hand hovering over her. He let it drop and then started inching away from her. "I- I-"

Reaching out, she grabbed onto his coat. "Draco-"

At her touch, he jerked and then quickly leaned forward to help her turn her body to lean against the sofa. He was silent the whole time, lips in a thin line and eyes avoiding hers.

She tried to force a smile even as tears started running down her face. Wiping them quickly, she cleared her throat experimentally to see if she could try to talk again. A shudder ran down her body and she grabbed her arms tight.

He grimaced and then scooted close enough to wrap the blankets around her. When she wasn't shivering anymore, he reached towards her neck with two fingers and pulled down her scarf to expose her throat. His fingers were gentle and she barely felt them as they brushed her neck. After staring at it a moment, he did the same with her gloves to check her wrists. She could see the bruises starting to form on her right wrist. "Shite," he said quietly.

Hermione covered his fidgeting hand with her own. "It's okay," she whispered.

He moved to pull away his hand but she grabbed it.

She waited until he looked into her eyes. "Really."

He shook his head. "I nearly killed you, Hermione."

She smirked. "Not quite." Her voice still wasn't loud.

He picked up his wand from where she had dropped it. "Let me fix it."

She shook her head.

His mouth pulled taut and he winced. "Right." He held out his wand. "Then you do it."

She motioned around the room. "No magic," she said to remind him of the restrictions in the lab. She had already broken them once by spelling him. "I've survived worse." She smiled but he looked away from her, frowning. Reaching out to his face, she turned it towards her. His stubble pricked her thumb and the sensation buzzed along her arm. She resisted pressing her whole hand against his cheek, but only just. He was so beautiful even when his face was screwed up in pain but she wished he would stop beating himself up. Forcing a smile, she tried to say enough without killing her throat. "I'm fine. The potion just turned yellow. Wake me when you're done?"

She tried to hide the effort it took to say that but his lips were still a thin line as he watched her throat. "No, you aren't. You can barely talk."

Hermione sighed. What else could she say?

Raising up his wand again, he said, "I'm going to heal your throat."

She opened her mouth to argue but Draco shook his head. "I don't care about the bloody rules. It will survive one spell."

"But-"

"Just shut it, Hermione." He glared at her but she could see his hand shaking a little and how he was very carefully not touching her. "You do it or I will. I understand if you don't want me to but..."

"I trust you, Draco," she whispered. Saying it, she knew it was true. "Just do it." When he had attacked her she had known that something was wrong. She was positive he couldn't have been trying to hurt her and she had been right. She didn't know what he could do that would make her more certain of him than she already was.

"You're sure?" he asked, swallowing hard.

She nodded and closed her eyes.

He muttered a couple diagnostic spells and then several spells for healing. There was a pause and then he whispered, "Hermione?"

She opened her eyes.

He was staring intently. "Well?"

She swallowed experimentally. No pain. "I think it might have worked," she whispered and there was no pain then either.

His face relaxed. "Good. Now let's get you up."

He offered a hand and she took it, allowing him to pull her up and ease her back onto the cushions. He picked up the blankets and gently tucked them around her again, his forehead leaning close to her as he did so. She sat still under his administrations, just watching him, and he looked up to meet her gaze.

He tugged one of the blankets up under her chin and then cupped the side of her face briefly. "Get some sleep." His fingers were on her cheek and then slid off so quickly she only felt the ghost of them on her skin. She closed her eyes to try to remember the feeling as he walked away to the lab table. Even the ghosts of his fingers disappeared too quickly and the space between her and Draco as he started to work on the potion seemed to grow. She shivered a little as she remembered another ghost of his fingers when they were tight against her throat. Shoving away some of the blankets, she rummaged through her beaded bag she had kept in her coat pocket. It was only when she didn't find it that she realized what she was looking for: a potion. Hermione ground her teeth. Would she ever be free of this? She leaned back on the sofa and stared at the ceiling, trying to control her breathing and convince herself that she didn't need a potion. She wasn't very persuasive. It was a little ridiculous. Sure, he had scared her at the time, but she knew he wasn't trying to hurt her. However, her body had jacked up all fight or flight responses and wasn't letting them go. When the clatter of voices in her head became too much, she swung her feet down onto the ground and joined Draco at the potions lab.

He looked up from straining the berries and frowned. "Go sleep."

She shook her head.

He raised an eyebrow at her before tapping the berry pulp into a glass container.

She sighed. "I need to be distracted."

He motioned to the other side of the table. "Then prep the secondary potion. From what?"

She nodded and collected the ingredients, including the drained mistletoe. "I want a potion right now. My potions."

He nodded, a look of disgust creeping onto in his face. She froze for a moment, thinking it was directed towards her, but then he said, "You don't have to stay if you can't be around me now."

Shaking her head, she smiled sadly. "Draco, I've forgiven you already."

His frown deepened.

"Does it ever get easier?" she asked. "Not drinking?"

Not looking up, he continued to drop the husks of the mistletoe berries into the potion as he stirred. "No. You just get stronger." He finished and brushed his hands off, starting again with wand turns that he clicked off on a hand-counter. "There will always be a voice in the back of your head that will try to convince you that it wouldn't hurt to go back." He looked up from the counter and their eyes met. "It usually speaks up when you are the most vulnerable." Hermione looked down and back up as he said, "Just because it seems to make sense at the time doesn't mean you should listen."

She nodded. It made sense and it seemed that was what had happened for her. They worked in silence for a while. She hadn't really thought that he might still be craving alcohol so often. He had seemed so disgusted by it and so strong at the meetings. She supposed that was part of why everyone was called a 'recovering addict.' Her mind wandered back to his dream that led him to attack her. She hadn't realized either that he also had ghosts that made him jump at shadows and not be able to sleep without protecting those around him. Of course, for him, it seemed like it required more than a silencing charm. Hermione finished the potion and put it aside to set before helping Draco with the main potion. While she kept track of Draco's turns with the hand counter, she watched him and wondered, "What was your nightmare about?"

Lifting his eyes from the potion, he grimaced, and then went back to watching his wand. "The night you escaped the manor." It was several more wand turns before he spoke again. "I hate not being able to do anything. Being stuck with such bloody useless choices." His knuckles were white around his wand.

She waited for him to continue, but he didn't. "My therapist has me imagine entering my nightmares as a third person to help my old self. Would that help you?"

He shrugged and she clicked off fifty turns.

"Start counting out loud," she told him as she checked to make sure her secondary potion was ready. It was and she poured it into the main potion once Draco had reached sixty-three wand turns. As they waited for the two potions to react properly, they crumpled the dried mistletoe leaves.

"I would bring Blanks to apparate my family out," he said suddenly. "And Mog would take Bellatrix somewhere. He was always wicked fast. I know they would help me, or, at least, now they would." Pausing a moment, he picked out a few sticks from his pile. Then he continued, "That would let you escape with Dobby."

Hermione's fingers stilled and she swallowed. Talking about that night still hurt but was also accompanied by a sense of relief to know he would help her now if he could. It was strange - he was talking about something neither of them could change. Would never have to go back and change. And yet, it still released something she didn't know had still been tight in her chest. She blinked away tears and smiled up at him. "Mog?"

He glared at her. "I came up with those nicknames when I was four."

She snorted and the mood was broken.

They continued to brew the potion, speaking less and less the more tired they became. Despite everything it was a silence that comforted Hermione just like the gentle breaths Draco took as he worked and the rustle of their coats and the dull thuds of their knives. It was the most comfortable she had been with silence for a long time.

* * *

The title of this chapter comes from a comment which I found hilarious. Thank you to all who have commented, bookmarked, and kudoed!


	48. In which things don't go as planned

One of the many problems of brewing by moonlight was Hermione didn't get to pick which day was the full moon. That meant going to school with about four hours of sleep and her brain already exhausted. She hadn't bothered with a new change of clothes and had just stuck her head under the shower to tame her hair and try to wake up. The shower really hadn't helped with anything either except now the back of her jumper was soaked through and was chilling her enough that she thought she could probably stay awake during the first class.

She used the floo and had started for the classroom when she heard Draco call her name.

She turned and saw him half-jogging towards her. He still had a beanie pulled over his head and she wondered if he had attempted to clean up even at the small level she had. She waited until he caught up and then they began to walk in time. Comforted by his presence at her shoulder, she leaned towards him as close as she could without actually touching him. She wanted to just snuggle up under his arm and walk like that but instead she teased, "Weren't you going home to freshen up?" She pointed at his beanie and then couldn't resist going up on her toes and trying to pat down the tuft of hair sticking out of it. It didn't work and she stopped, the bold move now embarrassing her. Checking his face, she tried to gauge his reaction.

He had been staring at her the whole time and when she met his eyes he smirked. Hermione's face got even hotter.

He tucked his hair all the way under his beanie and then said, "I needed to grab something. Last night you made me think of it." He swung his book bag around and started rummaging in it as he walked towards one of the out-of-the-way nooks along the hallway.

She followed him and wondered which part of last night had made him think of what, exactly? He pulled out a small rectangular box with gold decorations. It reminded Hermione of jewelry boxes she had seen her father get her mother before he got wise to the fact that her mother did not like jewelry. Why would Draco think of jewelry he had?

"My mother sent it recently when I told her... well, they are heirlooms."

"Malfoy heirlooms?" Hermione couldn't help asking, taking a small step back.

He laughed. "I checked them for absolutely every type of curse I could think of."

She hesitantly looked between the box and Draco.

He smirked and opened the black box. Inside were two gold rings with intricate designs. When she leaned in closer, she realized they were dragons wrapped around themselves. Although the edges were worn a little, they still gleamed in the sunlight from the nook's window. What had she said last night that made him think of these? Why had his mother sent them?

She looked up and raised an eyebrow.

He smiled and pulled one out. "It used to be that once you were engaged you could barely speak with your fiance. The Malfoy heir would use these to send messages back and forth to get around the rules a little."

"Engaged?" Hermione repeated in a high voice. What had she missed? Had she fallen asleep and had some insane conversation she couldn't remember? Several students had passed through the hallway going to class but none seemed to noticed them in their little corner, which was good just in case this conversation took a much more wild turn than she was expecting.

He raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Rushing things a bit, aren't you?"

She shoved his shoulder and then looked away as her ears warmed. "Then why did you think of these, Draco Malfoy?" Well, at least she wasn't going to have to go down that road today.

"The messages." He held out the ring. She took it hesitantly and he pointed to the long body of the dragon. "Watch."

He picked up the other ring and closed his eyes, his forehead wrinkling a little. The ring in her hand got hot and she glanced down. In cursive script the empty space on the dragon body now was full of words.

"Hey, bookworm?" Hermione repeated. It was a very unromantic message. All this talk of engagements had made her expect something a little different.

He smirked. "You try. Just as long as it's touching your skin it should work."

She rolled her eyes at him before closing them and focusing on a message. Her ring warmed and then he looked down at his ring.

"Hello, potion-slug," he read and then up at her with a raised eyebrow.

She snorted. "You did it first."

He rolled his eyes.

"So, message rings?" she prompted him. That was a little less intimidating than engagement rings even if that seemed to be what they actually were.

He nodded. "When you were talking about only having one wand it made me think of all the times you can't get to a wand or when you..." His eyes trailed down to the arm that she had split open at the top of the fire escape stairs. Or when she had lost her magic. Did he expect that to happen again? She bit her lip and distracted herself from thinking of that fiasco by putting the ring on her pointer finger and spinning it a little.

She glanced up with a smile. "Isn't it a tad egotistical to be giving me something made of your namesake?"

He blushed and shoved the box back into his bag. "I didn't make them. There are dragons on my family's crest."

"Family crest?" Her fingers froze around the ring. "Are these pinning gifts?"

He rubbed the back of his neck before shifting his gaze from the ring to her. "What would you say if they were?"

It felt like she was going to choke on the very air she was trying to breathe. Yes, she wanted them to be pinning gifts. Right? Maybe. What exactly did that mean? Was it an engagement or just agreeing to dating? Or something else? These stupid pureblood traditions were only cute when they were between Luna and Rolf and she didn't have to worry about what they exactly meant.

She bit her lip. "I think so if... well..." she trailed off and worried her lip as she glanced up at him. "What exactly does it mean?"

Draco looked away from her mouth and cleared his throat. "It's... it means that you'll let me court you, in essence. Like agreeing to date, but it's not a promise for an engagement. Not technically."

She lifted an eyebrow. "Court?"

Draco glowered at her, his cheeks turning red. "Yes, court. I show my interest and skills as a... well, husband and you decide whether you are interested."

Lifting her hands to cover her own cheeks, Hermione wasn't sure which part of that to focus on. Skills? Husband? Usually the logical end of dating was either engagement or break-up but it seemed so much more formal and... overwhelming when it was put in traditional Pureblood terms.

"I-" She bit her lip. "Erm... will there be live turkeys?"

Draco, who had been staring at her intently, closed his eyes and snorted. "Not unless you want them."

"Then, yes, as long as there aren't turkeys involved."

He grinned and scooped up her hand, the sudden contact having the same effect as a burst of cold wind, and then brought it to his face. He lowered his lips slowly and brushed them against one of her fingers curled over his hand and she squeezed his hand. His breath snorted out across her hand and her fingers twitched. He glanced at her for a moment before moving on to press his gentle mouth to the next finger, slowly brushing down to it's tip. The contact tingled along that finger and jolted through her arm.

Hermione jerked and pulled her hand back. "You flirt!"

His laughed hovered in the back of his throat, deep and shy, and then he put his elbow out for her to grab. "Shall we?"

"I'm not getting escorted to class!" she said, adjusting her book bag. When he looked at her bag, she crossed her arms and started walking away from him. "And you aren't taking my bag! You don't need to show off your 'skills'!"

He caught up with her and smirked. "Are you sure? You didn't seem to mind back there."

She hit him lightly on the shoulder. "Merlin's robes, Draco!" Really, she didn't mind. Except maybe in front of their friends. How did anyone survive dating a guy in public who knew how to flirt? Not that she was complaining. This was a problem she didn't mind having.

"You have any skills you want to show me?" Draco asked as they continued to walk.

She mock-glared at him. "Getting to class on time. One you seem to have lost since-"

"Draco Malfoy!" someone screamed and both of them jumped. Shandra was barreling towards both of them from the floo point. "You disgusting sadistic ass-hole!"

Hermione and Draco shared a wide-eyed glance before he turned away from her to face Shandra.

"How dare you lie to all of us this whole time!" Shandra hissed as she furiously smacked Draco repeated with a rolled up newspaper. "You bastard!"

"Erm... you're going to have to be more specific about what," he said dryly, raising both hands up with palms out, managing to look peaceful but still blocking most of her blows.

She stopped and glared at him and then at the right side of his face. "At least someone has got to you already."

Hermione reached out and grasped Draco's chin. Sparks tingled at the contact as she pulled Draco's face towards her. He helped by turning his head the rest of the way so she could see his whole face. Her hand dropped and she put a hand over her mouth. A purple bruise was starting along the outside of his eye that she hadn't noticed when she was on the other side of him.

He raised an eyebrow at her.

"I gave you a black eye," Hermione told him, pointing.

He touched it gingerly. "Last night?"

She nodded.

"Why are you even talking to him?" Shandra nearly snarled, whipping her head towards Hermione.

Hermione blinked and looked down at Shandra's fists as they clenched and unclenched. She couldn't think of anything Draco had done recently that would get this kind of reaction from Shandra. "What happened?" Hermione asked.

Without a word Shandra unrolled the newspaper and shoved it at both of them. Across the top it read 'Deatheater in New York!' with a photo of Draco ducking into the Tuneful Brew.

"The hell?" Draco grabbed it out of Shandra's hands and started reading it. Shandra flinched and snapped her hand away from Draco's and held it close to her chest. When Shandra didn't do anything else, Hermione skimmed the first quote around his shoulder:

_I sent my son to the YWC with the expectation that he would be safe and instead they hire a Death-eater who was in Voldemort's inner circle! It was only after he tried to kill my son that I urged the YWC to do a background check and when they did not I took it upon myself to hire a Personal Investigator. Imagine my surprise when I learned that the man supposedly caring for my son had not only cast multiple Unforgivable Curses but also housed and fought for Voldemort!_

Draco rounded on Shandra. "How many people read this paper?" He shook it at her.

Shandra widened her stance and stuck up her nose at him. "Worried how many people will learn about you?" she asked haughtily.

"Yes," he said simply and raised the newspaper again. "Who reads this? Do purebloods?"

"Why should I care?" Shandra snipped, folding her arms.

Hermione studied the paper: The Wizard's Herald. "I think Rolf reads it."

Draco's head snapped back to Hermione and then he ran a hand over his face. "Shite."

He started to pace and Hermione pulled the newspaper from his grasp to finish the article. There was also a quote from Ron farther on:

_Draco Malfoy is a slimy git. He went around pretending to be a Deatheater bad-arse but ran crying to his daddy whenever he didn't get his way. We found him during the battle groveling to some Deatheater... Well, he was part of this Squad that basically just bullied everyone not in their House. Oh, and he always called Hermione a Mudblood, hexed her several times, and let that bitch Bellatrix torture her at his Manor... Yeah, it went on for hours and she's still got the scar on her arm... It says Mudblood, of course. Didn't do a bloody thing._

"How could he?" she asked. She had been so careful about what she shared with the press because she hadn't wanted to be painted as a victim. Now Ron had managed to ruin that in the same swoop as ruining Draco. "How could he tell them all of that?"

Draco stopped pacing. "Because he is a wanker."

"Ron Weasley is a wanker?" Shandra asked, her lips curling deeper into her sneer as she put her hands on her hips. "What about you?"

He nodded. "Yeah, that too." He sighed. "I suppose the Wizarding world at large is going to find out just how much of one."

Hermione frowned and stepped forward to poke Draco in the shoulder. "How much of one you used to be," she correctly softly. That mattered.

He gave her a wane smile.

"Used to be?" Shandra said, rounding on Hermione. Shandra's arms were shaking now. "It's not like he was just some childhood bully. He is a Deatheater. He probably killed people! He let that crazy bitch torture you in his home and didn't do anything."

Draco stiffened and Hermione grabbed his jacket. She hissed, "Don't you dare talk so casually about things you don't understand!" She was so tired of people using that as ammunition against her and Draco. "He is an ex-Deatheater," Hermione said, emphasising the 'ex.' She tilted her head towards Draco."Have you killed anyone?" From the way Harry had talked about how much of a coward Draco was during the Hogwarts Battle Hermione was fairly certain that Draco hadn't.

He winced. "Erm... no. Not directly, at least. I-"

Hermione continued over the top of him, glaring again at Shandra. "What would have happened if you had tried to help me at your Manor?"

"I'd be dead, probably. Maimed, at least, but, Hermione, that doesn't..."

She held up a hand for Draco to stop talking and raised an eyebrow at Shandra.

Shandra folded her arms and glared.

"Draco has done a lot of stupid things." He shifted beside her but didn't say anything. "He has done a lot of cruel, prejudiced, and hurtful things." Hermione didn't look back at Draco as she said these things but skimmed her hand down his arm until she was holding his hand. "It is up to you whether you wish to be his friend. I don't blame you if you don't, but... I've forgiven him." She gave his hand a hard squeeze. "I've also chosen to be his friend because I like the man he is now. He is kind to those weaker than him, is dedicated to becoming better, and doesn't shy away from acknowledging his faults."

Shandra shook her head. Her finger limply gestured towards Draco and then fell down again. "But he hurt you."

Hermione glanced up at Draco who was watching her with a pained grimace.

"Everyone I care about has hurt me to a certain degree," she said, her eyes still trained on Draco. "It's more important what they do about it and Draco... he might have hurt me in the past but I know he has changed and I've also never had someone treat me better than he has since he did."

His mouth pulled into a sad smile and he cupped the back of her head with his hand before leaning forward to press his lips against her forehead.

She grabbed onto his jacket with both hands, closed her eyes, and leaned into the pressure of his mouth. His nose and fingers were still a little cold from being outside but his lips were just warm and comforting. He broke contact and then whispered into her hair, "Thank you, Hermione."

Eyes still closed, she smiled and nodded.

"He hurt you," Shandra repeated and Hermione opened her eyes to watch Shandra more closely. Shandra was slowly backing away from the two of them, shaking her head slightly.

"Shandra..." Hermione started but then Shandra glanced to the side before turning away from her.

"Daryn! Have you read the paper today?" Shandra asked in a shrill voice.

Daryn was coming down the hall and stopped to take in Shandra, Hermione, and Draco. Hermione stepped between Draco and Daryn, bracing herself for his reaction.

"Yes," Daryn said, studying Hermione. "It certainly explains some things."

"That's it?" Shandra asked, looking hurt. "That's all you have to say?"

"Shandra," Daryn said as he moved closer so he could put his arm around her. "You know Draco. He hasn't hurt you."

Shandra wiped her cheeks and sniffed."He is a Deatheater." She gestured with her pointer finger. "He is a pureblood. He believes that awful pureblood crap!" she spat at Draco.

Hermione heard Draco heave a long sigh. Still standing in front of him, she reached back and felt him put his hands in hers. She squeezed his hands and he squeezed hers back. How often was he going to have to deal with this now that the paper had come out? Had this happened in England? Would it stop?

"How can you live with yourself?" Shandra asked, glaring at Draco again.

Hermione could feel him stiffen behind her. Hermione gritted her teeth. Why was Shandra still ranting? Shandra hadn't even known Draco when he had been a death-eater.

Shandra continued, "How can you even show your face in public like nothing-"

Draco's hands reflexively squeezed Hermione's and something in her snapped.

"Stop it!" she growled, letting go of Draco's hands to lunge at Shandra. Draco's arms caught her around the middle even as Daryn stepped between them. Hermione's momentum rebounded off of Draco's arms and she fell back against his chest.

"That's enough, Shandra," Daryn said.

Draco squeezed Hermione tight against him and she didn't try to struggle. She just glared as she tried to calm down her breathing.

"I can't believe you are defending him," Shandra hissed. "Did you see what he did? He hurt her. He hurt people."

"Shandra," Daryn sighed. "Draco isn't him."

Shandra jerked. "What?"

"He isn't the one who hurt you."

Shandra put her hand over her mouth and took a quick sobbing inhale.

"He didn't kill your mom."

"Shut up!" Shandra cried and shoved him. She ducked her head down into her hands. "Why would you..." She gasped before a few broken sobs escaped her again. Daryn pulled her into a hug again and she let him, resting her face on his chest.

Hermione bit her lip. This partly explained why Shandra had been so prejudiced towards purebloods. Had she been attacked by a death-eater or just a pureblood who believed all the same things? Was there really a difference?

As he patted Shandra's head, Daryn said, "the man who hurt you is in jail. It's in the past. You are safe. Everything is okay." Shandra heaved another sobbing sigh and hugged him harder. He looked between Hermione and Draco again. "He doesn't hurt you, does he?" he asked Hermione.

Hermione shook her head. "You've seen how he is now. Just a little caustic at times."

"I am not," Draco muttered behind her.

Daryn raised an eyebrow. "I would beg to differ."

Hermione giggled nervously.

Just then, John came jogging down the hallway, stopping when he noticed them all standing there. He nodded at everyone. "Hey, um... I guess we're all going to be late then?" He jerked his head a little at Draco. "My mom told me about the paper. You were involved in some crazy stuff back in the day."

"That's one way to put it," Draco said dryly.

"So... we going to class?" John asked, looking uncomfortably at Shandra, who was still shaking a little with her head buried in Daryn's chest.

Daryn shrugged. "We'll catch up with you guys in a bit."

Draco stepped away from Hermione but slid one arm from her waist to around her shoulders. She smirked a little. Did he think that was a suave move? It didn't really matter either way. She snuggled under his arm. Draco looked down, raising an eyebrow. She grinned and snaked her arm under his jacket to grab the back of his shirt. Smiling, he pulled her a little closer. Especially with what had just happened and was sure to come, she just wanted to bury herself against him and to comfort and be comforted by their closeness.

"It's going to be okay," she whispered to him.

His smile dropped. "There is no way this is going to be okay."

She gazed sadly up at him and wondered what she could say. Maybe he was right but couldn't he possibly be wrong? Daryn and John had been okay with it. Surely there would be others like them?

They had started for class with John when a voice carried down the hallway. "Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy?" It was Professor Spinder.

They both froze, and Hermione raised an eyebrow at Draco. He shrugged and they turned around.

"Yes, Professor?" she asked.

He frowned at both of them. "Rather late for class, aren't you? Follow me."

Hermione shot a worried look at Draco and he shook his head. They both started to follow the Professor but Hermione peeked back over Draco's arm.

"John, please take notes during class for us?"

John gave her a thumbs up. "Sure thing."

Hermione thanked him but was sure most of that class would be lost to the ether. However, at that moment, there were a lot more important things to worry about than a Charms class.


	49. About last night

Once they entered the Professor's office, Hermione and Draco sat next to each other, their knees just brushing. Draco left his hand palm up on his knee and, when he glanced towards her with his eyebrows ever so slightly up, Hermione slipped her hand into his. His long blunt fingers pressed into her hand and the pressure helped ease some of the tenseness that had started to build in her shoulders. She smiled at him and his mouth turned up just a little.

The Professor cleared his throat. "Last night at least one spell was detected at the magical preserve observation station." He shifted in his seat and gave them both a good long stare.

Hermione had forgotten about last night with everything else that had happened. She glanced worriedly towards Draco, but he didn't look back.

The Professor continued, "You were the only ones there at the time."

Hermione squeezed Draco's hand, unsure what to say. He, on the other hand, sat up straight and said flatly, "It was me."

She opened her mouth to argue but Draco's grip crushed her hand.

The Professor's eyebrows slid up. "You are aware that you agreed to abide by their rules in order to use that facility which included no magic beyond potion making?"

"Yes, sir," Draco said.

Hermione shifted uncomfortably, suddenly hot under the Professor's stare. She pushed her sleeve up and then glanced down to see a very obvious hand print now exposed on her wrist. She quickly shoved down her jacket but, when she looked up, the Professor was staring at her wrist.

"What, exactly," he asked, looking between them and pausing at Draco's black eye, "happened last night?"

"Erm..." Hermione hedged.

"I attacked her," Draco said blandly.

"Draco!" Hermione hissed.

His mouth was pulled into a thin line when he looked at her. "I was asleep but I still attacked you." He turned back towards the Professor. "I nearly strangled her and then insisted that I fix it despite the rules."

The Professor looked at Hermione and asked, "Is this true?"

"Yes," she said. "However, I-"

Draco's foot stomped on her toes- so hard that it hurt even through her boots. She didn't look at him but did pause to swallow a yelp. Then her ring grew hot and she glanced down to see the words: _Need only one culprit._

"However?" Professor Spinder prompted.

Hermione sighed, sure Draco would probably be offended by her bleeding Gryffindor heart's impulse to jump in and take the blame with him. She had done something like what he had just done in her first year for Harry and Ron and would have been insulted if they hadn't taken it. "I don't want people to hear this and assume he hasn't changed," Hermione finished lamely. Still, she couldn't help saying, "Can't I take the blame and-"

"No," Draco growled and Professor Spinder cleared his throat.

"No, that won't be necessary," the Professor said calmly. "As long as your other classmates are willing to allow Draco to work on the project without being on the preserve, we will not need to inform anyone else of what happened. On that topic, Draco would you stay just a little longer to talk about your prospects at this school? Hermione, you may leave."

Draco's face shut down.

"Draco?" she asked. Hesitantly, she scooted towards the edge of her seat and then checked his face for any sign of what he was thinking.

He closed his eyes and signed before opening them and giving her a twitch of his mouth that might have been an attempt at a smile. "It's fine, Hermione." He patted her knee gently before clasping his hands in front of him and looking away. "Just go to class."

She stood, pausing as she tried to figure out what to do to comfort him. In the end, she gently brushed her fingers along his shoulder and left him to face down the Professor by himself.

Why was all this happening? It seemed that once Draco was finally trying to leave his past behind, it slithered back into his life and tried to pull him back down again. This time it was at least partially her fault, too. If only she hadn't had a potions problem, that boy wouldn't have fallen and his mother wouldn't have gone on a witch hunt. (Or wizard hunt, as the case was.) If only Ron hadn't decided to open his big fat mouth and blab to the reporters. If only… Hermione sighed.

…

After the next lecture, which Hermione was only able to half listen to anyway, Daryn asked her to help with some potion prep for their group project. They both followed the spiraling staircase to the school's top floor.

The whole floor was one big green room with several large skylights that allowed the brilliant beams of a crisp winter sun to drench the thick foliage surrounding them. Hermione took in a deep breath of the moist earthy smell of growing things and couldn't help smiling. It was a welcome relief from the still frozen world outside. She inched off her jacket, hung it on her arm, and then ran her fingers softly over a Wiggentree's spindly branches. If Hermione knew that this was the room they could have been using to brew their potion instead of the magical creature preserve, she would have fought harder to brew at school. Probably. Draco had been convincing. Her shoulders slumped. If she knew that it would somehow get another tally on his record, she would have flat out refused no matter what cute face Draco tried to make to convince her.

Daryn sat down on one of the benches lining the path through the green house and she followed suit. He pulled out a cauldron that had just barely fit in his backpack and then started pulling ingredients out of it. "The add-in potion for the seventh stage doesn't have to be brewed in moonlight until it is added to the base potion," Daryn explained.

Hermione nodded. She appreciated that Daryn helped as much as he could with the project even with his busy evening musical schedule. She placed his copy of the brewing instructions in a position so that they both could see it and started dicing the shrivelfig. This part of the potion needed more shrivelfig than she thought one potions shop should or could carry but Daryn had found enough somehow.

They worked in companionable silence for awhile, occasionally murmuring to each other to make sure the were still on the same page or for an ingredient or tool. They both reached for the mortar at the same time, hands brushing briefly. They smiled at each other and Hermione gestured for him to take it.

"I'll finish up dicing the shrivelfig first," she said.

He nodded and pulled the mortar towards him.

It was so strange. This reminded her of brewing with Draco- the comfortable ease between them- but there were no sparks when they touched and it wasn't just that. There had been sparks with Ron and it still hadn't been the same. She stared hard at her shrivelfigs as she diced them but barely saw them as she though. It was the same because of friendship- she really cherished her friendships with Draco, Daryn, and Ron for that matter- but what was the extra thing that had made her agree to a pinning gift from Draco of all people? Was this just another daft decision made by hormones like she suspected at least part of her relationship with Ron had been? She shook her head and used the back of her knife to scrape diced shrivelfig into a bowl she transfigured out of one of her quills. No. She didn't think so. Really hoped not. If she had felt this way about Draco while he was still his old self in Hogwarts then it would have been a daft decision made by hormones. It felt like now they understood what the other was struggling with and want they wanted. It felt like Draco cared about her and did his best to care for her. That, combined with the sparks of attraction, maybe that was it? Relationships were so much harder to decipher than potions and runes. She sighed and reached to tuck her hair behind her ear.

"Hermione." Daryn's voice was sharp and stern.

She looked up to see his face clouded by a dark emotion and froze at the sudden change of mood. She followed his gaze over to her arm, where her jumper had ridden up to expose several finger marks. She dropped her arm and used her other hand to pull down the sleeve. "Nothing," she said hurriedly. Why hadn't she thought to remove them yet?

Daryn set down his pestle and reached his hand out towards her, his fingers motioning for her to give him her hand. "Is that what you mean by 'a little bit caustic'?" he asked gently.

Hermione recognized the words from when she had been defending Draco earlier that morning. "No, it's not! He didn't do it on purpose."

Daryn's mouth pulled deeper into a frown but his words were still soft. "Is that what he told you?"

She let her head fall briefly. Daryn was misunderstanding the situation but she could see why. She took a deep breath and cast a stasis spell on the potion before readying herself to try to explain. "Look, Draco isn't going to be happy I'm telling you this," she started and then paused to point her wand at her bruises so she could finally remove them but Daryn reached across the table and grabbed her wand-hand.

She looked at him in surprise and he quickly dropped her hand. "Sorry, but please don't do that yet."

She paused, looked from the bruises and up to Daryn. He didn't want her to erase the evidence. She sighed. "You read the article?"

Daryn nodded.

"You read about what Draco did and who he was associated with?"

Again, Daryn nodded. "And what he did to you." His eyes trailed over her arm again.

She unconsciously rubbed the scar on her forearm.

"At that school," Daryn said as he still stared at her arms. "What happened between you? Did it happen like that Ron person said it did?"

She wanted the shrivelfigs back so that she at least had something to do with her hands. She clasped them in front of her and squeezed. "We were in the same year since we were eleven but we didn't interact for most of it. Mostly he would just throw insults at me and my friends. He was really caught up in blood purity and would call me a Mudblood."

Daryn's quick intake of air was barely audible. "Draco did?"

"Can't really see him doing that now, can you?" she said but it came out more of a question than she had meant it to. Maybe she just wanted someone else to agree that he had changed and to tell her she wasn't making a mistake by entering into a relationship with him.

"No." Daryn's voice was thoughtful. "Not really. I can't see him doing anything that was in the article."

Hermione had come up with reasons for how Draco had behaved when they were growing up. At least part of it was an inferiority complex a mile wide that had come with growing up with a father like he had had. However, those reasons sounded more like excuses when she was trying to explain his behavior. He had done bad things now he didn't. Wasn't that all that mattered? Almost. That and the fact that "Draco doesn't think that way anymore. There are some Muggles he helped even before he started coming to school and encountered the peer-pressure against pureblood pride."

Daryn cocked his head to the side. "It sounds like it did a lot more than throw insults when you got older. How do you get past that sort of thing?"

Hermione shrugged. It had never felt personal. "If there was anybody that he targeted, it was Harry Potter. I mostly got the backlash as one of his friends and in general for being a muggleborn Gryffindor." In that light, it also made sense why Harry was so adamantly against trying to see any good in Draco.

"Griff-in-door?" Daryn tried out the word and Hermione realized how foreign it must sound to him.

"Gryffindor. One of the Houses in Hogwarts. We were separated into four different groups and went to classes together and competed against the other groups and such. Draco was a Slytherin and there was a built in rivalry between Gryffindor and Slytherin before either of us started school."

Daryn nodded slowly. "So Draco used this to bully Gryffindors?"

"It predisposed us against each other and Draco bullied nearly everyone for something. He had talent for finding a person's insecurities and throwing it in their face." Now that she thought about it, that insight into a person's insecurities was probably how he could now be so gentle sometimes.

"So now you are just used to it?" Daryn asked slowly, holding her gaze for a few moments, his eyebrows pulled together. "Is that how you are dating him despite how he treated you and is still treating you?"

Anger flashed in her and she glared at Daryn. "He isn't treating me like that anymore," she bit out. "If he ever treated me like he used to, I would transform him into a ferret and sell him to the parents of the snottiest, brattiest kid I could find."

Daryn blinked.

Hermione held her arm up. "This is from when Draco attacked me in his sleep."

Daryn's eyebrows both went up.

"He was dreaming I was being attacked again and was trying to defend me. You should have seen his face when he realized what he had done..." she trailed off as she remembered that face. It had looked too much like the face he had had on right before he had shut down and sent her out of Professor Spinder's office. A defeated sort of look.

Daryn tilted his head for a moment before patting her hand and leaning back in his chair. "I'm not going to say I understand it, but, like I told Shandra, I've never seen him hurt you or anyone else." He gestured towards her arm. "I think a combined Aufero Mortuus Sanguis and Sana Arteriae would work best, though you might only need the first."

Hermione smiled in relief and used the first spell he had suggested. Her arm was a little sore but the fingerprints were gone.

They started up the brewing process again but Hermione's hand jerked as she slid the diced shrivelfig in and she remembered something else.

Daryn started the wand turns but he watched her, waiting.

"I had to use a spell to wake Draco up and then he used a spell to heal me and he took the blame for both and he can't go back to the preserve."

At first they wouldn't technically need two people per shift but the later stages were going to be so complicated it would be near impossible to complete them by herself. Hermione dropped her head into her hands.

"He attacked you at the potions lab?" Daryn asked and then continued after her nod. "And this place is booked solid for the rest of the semester." He pulled his wand out of the potion and then set a timer. He tilted his head to the side and then sighed. "Barry's uncle is part of a muggle-band but could probably be my stand-in for the last few weeks of the semester. That way I could be your lab partner. Besides, I need to focus a little more on my school work anyway," he said the last part dryly.

"Are you sure?" Hermione asked hesitantly. Daryn had slowly been pulling away from them as his band continued to have more success and, in turn, more gigs and expectations. "We can find another way. I don't want to ask you to give your music up just because we were stupid."

Daryn laughed and shook his head. "It's just a couple weeks, Hermione. Not the end of the world."

…

The next morning Draco didn't meet them for class.

"Good," Shandra said, crossing her arms and tilting her head up. "At least now he is too ashamed to show his face."

Hermione glared darkly at Shandra. She was worried that was exactly it.

"Or," Daryn cut in mildly. "He might have decided to go skiing. I heard the powder is perfect in Highmount right now." Daryn squeezed Hermione's hand and leaned in close to whisper to her, "He probably just needs some time. Like Shandra." Shandra hadn't come back for afternoon classes yesterday.

"Ahhh," John groaned dramatically as he slumped down against his desk. "Don't torture me. I want to go skiing," he told the flat surface.

Daryn smiled slightly. "At least tomorrow is the weekend?"

John perked up again. "And I know exactly what I'm doing with it! Who is with me?"

"Gig," Daryn explained with a shrug.

Shandra studied her nails. "Same."

John turned his hopeful eyes on Hermione.

"Sorry, John. Draco and I are going to a Sikh festival together."

John nodded. "Nice. What kinda festival is it?"

Hermione frowned and then realized his mistake. "No, a Sikh festival. As in the religion of Sikhism."

John's eyebrows came down in slight confusion. "Huh. Well, I'm sure it will still be sick," he said with a smile and a thumbs up.

She couldn't help smiling back. At least... she thought they were still going. She needed to find out what was happening with Draco.

She sent a note through her ring. _Where are you?_

There was a long pause and then her ring grew hot and that same message appeared on it. Either the ring was malfunctioning or Draco was messing with her. She decided to act on the assumption it was the latter. _Perfecting my on-time skills, s_he answered.

_I'm perfecting my cooking skills._

Hermione frowned down at his answer. Was he talking about making laddu with Harjeet? _Isn't that tonight?_

_For you. Pay attention to class._

Her frown deepened even more. What was Draco thinking, skipping out on class today after doing the same thing yesterday? Their classes moved quickly, and even a few days would result in serious time and effort to catch up and there really wasn't any extra time as they came upon another midterm season. Yet he still had the audacity to tell her to pay attention to class? She bit her lip angrily. She thought he had decided to own up to and face down his mistakes. What was he doing now? Now that he had his past catching up to him, was he going to turn tail and run? Maybe she really had been seeing a Draco that wasn't there. She brushed her finger over the ring, following the curve of the dragon's head and snout. She wasn't sure how to reply or even how to react. She still cared about Draco. She knew that much. However, she wasn't sure if she could trust in him if he could make an about-face so fast. It left her feeling betrayed somewhere deep where she had believed in him and especially in the new him. She covered the ring with her other hand and forced herself to listen to the lecture.


	50. In which there might be tears and onions

The second the last class was done for the day, Hermione threw her parchment and quill into her bag, made a beeline for the floo points, and floo-ed to WiNY. She had already looked up Harjeet and Samir's restaurant and it was a scant few blocks from WiNY and the church they held the AA meetings in. However, even that short walk had nearly frozen her by the time she had found the restaurant and hurried inside.

She was immediately greeted with warm air that wafted the spicy and also sweet pastry scents of the kitchen out towards her. It seemed small, but that may have been because the front entrance crowded with statues and plants and large paintings. The wallpaper was a busy dark red pattern and the walls were covered in rugs and heavy fabric curtains. The physical warmth combined with the warm tones of the room was enough to make Hermione want to curl up in one of the booths and just doze off for awhile. Last night's sleep hadn't been the greatest she had ever gotten, with all her worries about Draco circling around and then diving off into memories like the media debacles surrounding the Triwizard Tournament during fourth year. Even when she had finally fallen asleep, she had had nightmares about Draco and what might happen to him now that his past had caught up to him.

Harjeet was dressed in a sky blue tunic and loose pants that were both embroidered with bright magenta flowers. She greeted Hermione with a smile and welcomed her inside. "Ah, you have come earlier than we planned as well."

Hermione hesitated as she pulled off her coat. "Sorry, is this an inconvenience?"

Harjeet shook her head. "No, I've just been having Draco help with food prep so that when I come back Samir will be able to act as host without Amar being overwhelmed in the back.

The thought of Draco chopping vegetables made Hermione smirk.

They both wound through the low lit tables until they came to the kitchen and its glaring florescent lighting against the bright metal counters.

"I'll join you both once the lunch rush is finished," Harjeet said, patting Hermione's back. "Maybe you two will have a chance to talk about why Draco is so gloomy."

Samir, who was working over a large skillet and several pots, smiled at Harjeet over his shoulder.

Draco looked up from his cutting board and glared Harjeet's way. "Maybe I just wanted to cut class," he groused.

Harjeet shrugged. "I'll see you two in an hour or so."

Draco rolled his eyes and nodded before turning to look at Hermione. He gave her a playful smirk. "Want to see my cooking skills?" He twirled the knife in his hand and Hermione couldn't help wondering how many cuts he had gotten before he had perfected that. Then the annoyance of him standing nonchalantly in the kitchen while he cowardly ditched his future overshadowed anything else.

She curled her hands into fists and breathed in carefully, trying not to throw the words at him that were crashing around her head. Hadn't she just finished saying that he didn't run away from things or something like that when she was defending him? Yet, the second he encountered some trouble at school, he turned tail and ran.

The smirk on Draco's face slid off and he stared back solemnly, his jaw twitching a little.

At the silence, Samir turned from his stovetop and gave them both a quick glance over before turning back to his pots. "So, it is a lover's tiff that has got you moping all over my kitchen. Take out the trash and sort out whatever this is in the back alleyway."

"The trash is barely half-full," Draco stated, not taking his solemn eyes off of Hermione.

"And I want your useless ass out of my kitchen so you'll stop crying over my vegetables."

Hermione's eyes widened and Draco scowled, glaring daggers at Samir's back.

"It was those bloody onions and you know it!"

Hermione couldn't help a faint giggle and Draco glared at her too before spinning sharply and hefting a black bag out of the industrial sized rubbish bin. He stalked off towards the hallway located just behind Amar doing the dishes in a huge sink. "Our onions never make me cry," Amar said and Draco flipped him a two-fingered salute.

"Yeah, yeah, your posh British insults don't do nothing to me."

Posh they were not, but Hermione held her tongue as Draco pushed a door and let in a gust of freezing wind. She hurried out to follow him.

The few rays of sun from the high noon sun that actually reached all the way into the narrow alleyway in the back of the restaurant did nothing to warm it, and the chill immediately seeped into Hermione.

Face mostly in shadows, Draco set down the rubbish bag and pulled on the strings to tie off the top. Shivering, Hermione subtly cast a warming spell around the two of them.

He glanced up at her before tugging at the knot he had just made. "Thanks."

The silence grew between them and Hermione couldn't help the feeling of betrayal that still burned in her. Where was the person that she thought she had seen Draco change into? Was he just going to start running again? Where was the proud man that had cajoled her into trying to take control of her life? Why wasn't he taking control of his?

"Why," she finally asked. "didn't you go to school?"

He kicked the bag and sighed, folding his arms before he looked up at her with a blank face. "Because I can't be a Healer anymore."

She walked up to him and shoved a finger into his chest. "Why? Because some prejudiced girl decided to taunt you in school?"

Draco met her gaze as he reached up and held her hand gingerly. She couldn't help the warmness that rushed over her at his gentle touch. "No, Hermione. Professor Spinder told me I can't treat patients because of what I've done."

"They are kicking you out because of the healing spell?" Hermione asked angrily but then saw Draco's small shake of his head. "No, because of what you've done." Done during the war was unsaid but hanging between them. She squeezed his hand. "You were not convicted of anything in court and you were coerced into it. You should still be able to legally practice. We'll find a way."

He dropped her hand and gave a small shake of his head. "I'm not going to run away or blame anyone anymore. I'll take the consequences for my actions." He turned from her and picked up the rubbish bag, half-dragging it towards the dumpster against the wall.

"But you don't have to be a martyr."

He paused at the dumpster, hand on the lid, his head slanted towards her, but not all the way.

"Sometimes courage is to keep going even though there doesn't seem to be much hope for it to work out."

He didn't say anything but he didn't turn away either.

"Let me keep looking just for a little bit."

He lifted the lid and swung the rubbish bin into it then shifted so he was looking at her again. His arms were folded and his lips were draw out into a thin line of reluctance.

"Please," Hermione asked, and then realized how much it was for her as it was for him. "Please don't leave me yet." She ducked her head. She hadn't realized how much she had been counting on him being there as her strength until it threatened to leave her. She was selfish.

Head still down, she heard Draco's steps draw closer and then felt his arms wrap around her back and pull her head down onto his shoulder. "I'll stay until the end of the term," he told her. "If nothing has changed I will move on. Samir could always use the help."

Hermione made a small noise of protest but didn't try to break out of his arms. She leaned her head into the crook of his neck and closed her eyes, savoring his warmth and the smell of his skin, before she let out a breath. Draco wouldn't be happy to be part of the kitchen staff for long. She had seen his passion when he was working with potions. To be taken from that would break something in him. She wasn't sure if there were enough unbroken parts of him to be able to survive it again.

Or, at least, his new self wouldn't survive. He would probably fall into old habits and his old self. Her hands tightened around his waist as resolve crept into her. She would try to save Draco from this and save him from his destruction just as he had tried to do for her. She just prayed he would let her and that he wanted to be that person she thought she saw in him.

"Come on," Draco said gently into her hair. "We should go back before they start making up wild stories about what we are doing."

Hermione chuckled and it was part weariness but also part true amusement. Despite her worries, she still couldn't help be affected by him. Shyly, she took his hand and he lead her back into the restaurant.

They entered and took turns washing their hands at a small sink next to Amar's. He ran an eye over both of them and then said, "Your hair is not nearly wild enough for you two to have made-up properly."

Hermione froze in wiping her hands on a paper towel and curled it up to throw at Amar's face.

Draco beat her to it by leaning in very close to Amar and whispering, "You shove it about Hermione or I will tell Samir exactly what you and Chelsea from the coffee shop are doing on your breaks."

Amar jerked back. "It's my breaks. I can do whatever I want!"

Draco raised an eyebrow. "In your Uncle's restaurant?"

Amar glared and Hermione grabbed Draco by the elbow and steered him past Amar before anything happened.

It turned out that there were more vegetables that needed to be chopped. Amar gave her the box of carrots and then rather maliciously banged the box of onions next to Draco.

Draco glanced down. "You've got to be kidding me."

Amar's grin was sly. "You did such a good job last time, even with all the tears in your eyes."

Draco moved to flip him off when Samir barked, "Both of you, back to work. I don't pay you to horse around."

"You're not paying me at all," Draco quipped.

Samir turned and pointed his spatula at Draco. "If you are in my kitchen you work. If you don't then-" he motioned with the spatula across his neck.

Draco waved a hand in acknowledgement before grabbing his knife. "Yeah, yeah. Right away, Boss chef."

"Head-chef, idiot," Amar chuckled. Samir's spatula turned on Amar, who immediately turned around, muttering, "Yes, Head-chef."

Later, when Hermione had gotten through at least a pound or so of carrots, Samir leaned over her shoulder.

"You've got it too," he said. "Sharp knife strokes, no wasted movement. When I saw Draco's chopping I thought he might be a chef but then I tasted his cooking."

"Hey!" Draco said indignantly, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. "My khichdi tasted fine!"

Samir chuckled. "It was passable but not enough to let you man my stove."

Draco turned back to his onions, muttering about stuck up sou-chefs and their bloody stove-complexes.

Samir turned back to Hermione and retrieved one of her bowls of carrots. "So, how do you both have this affinity to chopping vegetables?"

"Oh, we both had to do it a lot at the boarding school we grew up in."

"They forced you to help cook?" Amar guessed as Samir returned to the stove-top with her carrots.

Hermione smiled and shrugged, unfortunately, lying with the truth had become second nature to her as she had re-immersed herself into the Muggle world. "How about you? Where did you learn to cook?"

Amar shrugged back. "I helped my mata back home. Samir taught me the rest when I came to America. I'll help until I get a job with computers. I'm studying hardware at night."

"Hardware?"

"Amar has this notion that computers are going to take over the world," Samir said gruffly.

"I've already built my own computer though getting the motherboard to match up with the right sockets was a bit stupid. Should have gone the other way around," Amar said eagerly.

"I'll admit I'm rather in the dark about all of that," Hermione said.

Amar nodded sagely. "Draco is completely old school too. When I showed him my computer, you'd think he had never seen one before!"

"I still don't see the point of the bloody things," Draco mumbled, savagely chopping onions.

"Okay, chatterboxes," Samir interupted. "Amar you are on the stove and Draco on dish-duty."

"Finally!" Draco grumbled pulling up his shirt to once again rub at his eyes. When moving away from the onions, he had turned towards her, and so she finally saw the full affect of him in an apron when she wasn't distracted. She had been right, even if it wasn't a waiter's apron, he looked good in it. Especially when he tugged his shirt down and looked at her.

She took a deep breath in and bit her lip. This attraction was completely irrational! It was just an apron.

Meeting her eyes, he raised an eyebrow. "What?"

Should she tell him? Wasn't that the sort of thing that people did in a relationship, compliment each other and such? However, this was Draco Malfoy. Didn't he already have too big of an ego? She didn't exactly want to inflate it. She sighed.

"Okay, you are scaring me now."

Amar had been drying his hands as he watched the exchange. "Draco, you idiot, she is checking you out."

Draco's eyes jerked from Amar back to Hermione and he smirked before stalking towards her.

Her heart rate jumped and she spun around to face her cutting board as she tried to calm her heart. Now she definitely couldn't tell him. It would feel like some sort of defeat.

He stood behind her and tucked her hair over her opposite shoulder so her neck was exposed. He leaned in so his breath ghosted over her skin. "That true?" he asked. "Does the Hermione Granger think Draco Malfoy is fit?"

She couldn't help rolling her eyes. "Really, Draco?"

He chuckled and his warm breath sent goose pimples down her neck. He traced his fingers along her skin as he returned her hair back to its usual spot and that was too much. As he turned away, Hermione turned and grabbed him by the front of his apron. "You tease!" she hissed up at him, her nose nearly jamming into his chin.

"As Samir says, if you can't stand the heat then stay out of the kitchen," Draco said softly but with a smirk starting on his face.

"Well, if you can't stand the heat, don't start the fire," she whispered back as her grip tightened on the apron. She barely kept her voice even as the closeness of Draco sent her heart into overdrive. When things like this happened between them it was hard to remember she was worried about him. To even have something like this between them testified to how much he had changed and made her doubts seem small even if she couldn't shake them. Especially when he stared at her so intently.

Draco tilted his head to the side. "What sort of fire am I supposed to have started?"

Slightly mesmerized, Hermione tilted her head as well so that his breath ghosted on her nose. It felt like her chest was being squeezed tighter and tighter. Why was a little meaningless flirting nearly driving her out of her mind? She skimmed her fingers along his chin, his five o'clock shadow scratching her until she found a good grip and tilted his face down so that they were a little more on eye level. Something she hadn't thought about was it also brought their lips to nearly the same level too. She sucked her breath in. "Wh-what fire haven't you started?"

She saw his eyes crinkle but they were too close for her to see if his mouth was smiling although she was hyper-aware of each breath he took as it brushed her skin. "Should I take that as a dare?" he asked, eyes slipping down and fingers catching her hand still on his chin. Then he jerked as something flew towards them and caught it with his other hand.

Caught up in the flirting, Hermione took several seconds before she realized Draco was holding a spice container that Samir had apparently thrown at them.

"I've got enough heat in this kitchen without you two making eyes at each other," Samir said and gestured at them with the spatula.

They stepped apart and Hermione said, "Sorry, Samir."

He nodded and turned away again.

Draco threw the tumeric container into the air and deftly caught it again. "So, turned on by me using my 'seeker-thing' again?" he asked quietly behind Samir's back.

She rolled her eyes and grabbed the tumeric from him. "Are you ever going to let me live that down?"

He smirked. "Not likely. It is a rare thing to catch the Hermione Granger so in-eloquent."

She sighed in exasperation but couldn't help returning a small smirk of her own. She really really hoped she was right about him.

…

A/N: Thank you to my lovely beta, Fleurdelys21, for helping me polish this chapter and also thank you guys for your comments and involvement in this story! xxx Sam


	51. In which there are ladles and laddu

Hermione had gotten through the rest of the box of onions before Harjeet returned. Being smarter than Draco, Hermione had subtly cast a spell to protect her eyes from the onions and so she was not the least teary-eyed when Harjeet entered the kitchen.

Samir pulled his skillet off the stove and gently slapping the back of Draco and Amar's heads. "Behave, you two."

"Hey," Amar said, holding the back of his head with the hand he wasn't using to stir his pot. "What about her?"

Draco snorted. "She's Hermione Granger."

Hermione raised an eyebrow and mouthed 'really'?

"She wasn't the one starting the trouble, Amar."

Amar rolled his eyes but it was lost on Samir, who had already turned to leave.

Harjeet pulled out a large bowl and connected it with a mixing attachment.

"Draco, please finish those dishes. Amar, start up the fryer," Harjeet said, pulling down flours and spices from the cabinets. "Hermione, would you start pouring things into the bowl as I give them to you."

The next several minutes were a flurry of activity as Harjeet nearly glided around the kitchen, measuring things, pulling odd utensils from their racks and directing them all to do one thing or another. It was a very different method than Samir used but still quite effective. Hermione admired the grace with which Harjeet took over the kitchen and how, with barely a word, she sent Amar or Draco off for one task or another. How often had Draco come back here for them to be so comfortable with each other?  
Harjeet returned to Hermione who had been designated to slowly add water until the dough became the consistency of a thin pancake batter. Harjeet nodded in satisfaction (to the relief of Hermione) and then called Draco over.

She handed Hermione a ladle with holes in it and then held an identical ladle over the fryer. With another ladle she poured some of the batter onto the first ladle. To Hermione's surprise, the batter did not immediately run through the holes, but sat in the ladle until Harjeet gave it a tap on the pot and several drops of batter fell from the ladle and hissed in the oil. Harjeet continued to tap the ladle until most of the batter had dropped as tiny balls into the fryer. "The only way to make laddu," Harjeet explained, "is to have a boondi ladle." Then, when the dough had started to turn from white-yellow to golden-brown, Harjeet pulled the fryer-basket out of the oil and dumped the fried dough into a waiting bowl lined with paper towels. "We will do this with all the boondi batter," she explained, handing Draco the boondi ladle. "Any questions?"

Draco and Hermione looked at each other and Draco shrugged. "It seems pretty straight forward, Harjeet."

Harjeet nodded. "I'll help Amar prepare the dishes until you two are almost done."

Harjeet left and Hermione and Draco shared another look over their boondi ladles as they tried to figure out where to start. It had seemed simple enough when Harjeet had done it but…

Hermione pointed at the fryer. "Hold yours over there and I'll pour some into it."

Draco followed her advice but then she poured too much and it splashed in chunks into the fryer and they both groaned. As that piece of dough fried, Hermione dunked her ladle straight into the batter but that slopped it everywhere as she rushed it into the oil. When she finally got the ladle to the fryer, none of the batter would come out.

She bit her lip and glanced worriedly at Draco. He set down his own ladle and slid next to her so his bicep pressed against the outside of her arm as he gently held part of her hand and wrist in his grip. "Just a little firmer," he said softly into her ear and she couldn't help the shudder from his voice and body heat at her back. She wasn't sure he was doing it on purpose this time but this was driving her breathing up.

Distracted, she was a little startled when his grip pulled her hand down to tap the ladle hard against the pot. The batter fell in nice little drops like they had when Harjeet had done it. Hermione turned her head up to smile at Draco and found herself for the second time in the space of an hour close enough that she could have kissed him. She gasped, her chest tightening, and she turned away quickly to look down at the batter again, feeling her ears warm.

Draco chuckled behind her but returned to manning his own ladle. After a couple batches, they silently fell into a pattern where Draco would empty the fryers onto the waiting paper towels while Hermione carefully filled each of their ladles full again with the batter. During these exchanges, Draco took every advantage of letting his fingers slide along her wrists or leaning down to whisper something in her ear. Hermione, remembering that things had only escalated when she tried to take control earlier, focused on keeping her blushing minimal.

In between Draco's flirting, the kitchen was mostly silent except the sizzling of oil and gentle clacks of metal from utensils and pots. The smells of this kitchen were different than the more English ones of her family's kitchen but that was what it reminded her of. The silence was comfortable as everyone worked around each other, careful of hot plates or full bowls. Harjeet whisked by, checking over their shoulders at their progression.

She gave them both a smile. "Good. Good," she said as she looked over the batches of boondi. "Cook them a little longer, just a tiny bit firmer and it will be perfect."

Hermione smiled back as Harjeet swept away again and decided it felt like family. Like Sunday mornings when her family would work together to make a full English breakfast before church. They hadn't done it recently as the family traditions had mostly fell apart now that she wasn't part of their lives as regularly but she could remember that feeling and that was how it felt now.

Harjeet was bent over a pot on the stove, stirring and occasionally lifting up the ladle to watch the contents drip down. Hermione smiled fondly. Bless these dear people who made her feel so at ease among them even though they had barely met a few times before. Bless them for taking care of Draco and giving him this safe place.

Draco turned to give her his empty boondi ladle when he caught her expression. "What?"

Hermione took his ladle and shook her head. "These are good people," she finally said. "I can see how they helped you change."

He looked over his shoulder and smiled at Harjeet, who was still watching her pot carefully, before turning back to Hermione. "I owe them everything."

Hermione cocked her head in curiosity.

He saw it and shrugged. "They are the reason I'm not a drunk mess. They showed me what life was like if I believed in something bigger than myself."

She remembered him during the prayer at Thanksgiving. "You are religious?"

"I've adopted Sikhism." He accepted the full ladle she handed to him and then turned away as if he hadn't just dropped a bombshell on her.

She stepped back to the fryer next to him and started tapping the ladle again, her eyes still on Draco. "How did that happen? When did it happen? Do you go to the… the Sikh temple with Harjeet's family?"

"It's a Gurdwara and yes, most weeks."

She noticed he didn't answer her first question. "Draco, how did you adopt Sikhism?"

He didn't look up from his ladle but his lips were pressed together. "It's a long story."

"But a good one," Amar supplied from the stovetop.

They were all interrupted as a loud whirring noise filled the kitchen from Harjeet's food processor. "Amar, if Draco wants to keep the story to himself, you should respect that," she said.

Amar raised an eyebrow at Draco. "So you haven't told your girlfriend yet? Afraid what she might think?"

"Might think about what?" Hermione finally asked. If they were trying to kill her with curiosity it was half-way working.

Draco yanked their baskets out of the fryer and roughly dumped the fried dough out and then slammed them back into the fryer. "Thanks, Amar," Draco snapped. "Really helped me out there."

"What would you be afraid of me finding out?" Hermione asked, glancing down at his left arm, which he kept covered even in the heat of the kitchen.

He followed the movement and then grunted. Turning his eyes away from her. "You know how I told you I was arrested?"

Hermione nodded even though he couldn't see her.

"It was because I attacked Samir."

"What? But you said he bailed you out."

Draco didn't say anything and Hermione filled the boondi ladles with the last of the batter. Draco shrugged and started tapping his ladle again, not looking back at her.

Amar sighed. "You know Draco was a drunk, right?" he asked, placing a plate of food out for the waiter to retrieve.

Hermione glanced at Draco, who rolled his eyes. "Why else would she had been at that AA meeting?"  
"Amar, don't-" Harjeet started but Draco cut her off.

"No, it's fine. Amar can tell it."

"Draco was a drunk," Amar repeated, glancing over meaningfully at Hermione. "A mean drunk."

Hermione wasn't surprised.

"One time he had really gone off the deep end. He broke a table and was screaming nonsense at the sky. It was scaring the costumers so Samir went out to talk to him." Hermione felt her heart sink in anticipation. "When Samir did start talking to him, Draco turned and threw Samir into the street."

Hermione gasped.

"He was side-swiped by a car," Harjeet supplied as she carefully started collecting the fried dough into one large bowl now that most of it had cooled. "Samir only had a broken collarbone and some bruises."

"Only," Draco muttered mockingly, jerking out the last of the boondi dough from the fryer.

Draco turned off the fryer and Amar continued. "Draco ran after Samir and a police officer who had seen the whole thing went after him, thinking he was going to attack Samir again."

"You didn't attack the police officer, did you?" Hermione asked. Draco wouldn't be familiar with Muggle law enforcement.

Draco shook his head. "Samir told me not to."

Hermione raised an eyebrow but there was another whir from the food-processor, which, Hermione realized, Harjeet had put some of the fried boondi into. It took several minutes for Harjeet to process about half of the fried batter and during those minutes Hermione wondered how Draco had gone from nearly killing Samir to becoming friends.

"Start pouring these bowls into the sugar syrup on the stove," Harjeet said handing a bowl of the fried boondi to Hermione.

She accepted the bowl but paused, waiting for Harjeet to look up at her again. "What happened after Draco went to the police station?"

"Samir did not find out about it until he came from the hospital to the station fill out a statement about what happened. He chose to drop the charges."

"Right after Draco shoved him in the street?"

Harjeet's smile was fond and a little bit sly. "Well, not without some conditions."

"He brought in a lawyer," Draco said with pride in his voice. "Made me sign a contract about repaying the bail money if I skipped bail or didn't come to AA meetings or… a lot of things, actually."

Hermione turned to see a smirk on Draco's face. Of course the Slytherin in him appreciated it but why didn't he just break the contract and pay the money? She wasn't sure of Draco's financial situation but she was sure he could have done that, especially if he really had wanted to drink again. Hermione glanced at him again, considering.

"I went to AA meetings but they kept talking about a higher power and so I finally asked Samir about his. After several months I decided to adopt Sikhism." He shrugged as if it was simple. Which, of course, it wasn't. It was like telling how to get from A to B and then saying that the subsequent jump through all the letters to H were elementary.

"And that is how Samir managed to get the plague of our restaurant to start harassing us in our kitchen instead of as a customer," Amar concluded.

That statement only made Draco's smirk widen even if there was something a little painful behind it.

Harjeet poured the boondi and syrup mixture out into the bowls again after mixing it thoroughly. It was a lot of dough. If it had been cookie dough it probably would have made eight dozen batches or so.

"All that is left to do is form it into balls," Harjeet told them, demonstrating with a quick couple movements until she had a small speckled ball in her hands that she placed on a platter.

Hermione picked it up easily enough but Draco's seemed destined to become boxes instead of spheres.

After squishing the dough into yet another lumpy block, Draco set it down by Hermione's growing number of varying sized balls and then let out a gusty sigh.

Harjeet leaned over to see Draco's contribution and then laughed.

He rubbed his forehead with the back of his hand and sent her a humorless smile. "You can fix mine if you want to."

With a quick roll in her hands, the block became a ball.

He followed the motion and then closed his eyes. "Maybe I'll leave this to you two ladies." He wiped his hands on one of the cloths lying next to him and turned away. "I'm just messing it up anyway."

Hermione watched him leave and thought the whole scene a bit melodramatic. It was a dessert.

After wiping her own hands, Harjeet took a step after him. She placed a hand on Draco's shoulder and turned him towards her.

He turned but his eyes were on the ground.

She placed her hand on Draco's jaw and tilted his face up so that he met her eyes. Although Hermione had just done something very similar, this had a different tone to it. Gentle and a little motherly even though Harjeet couldn't have been much more than five years their senior. "Remember," Harjeet said. "'Oh my soul, abide with God, the destroyer of all pain.'" The way she said it made Hermione suspect it was scripture. Harjeet released her hand and tapped his chest. "Yours and Samir's."

His mouth was still flat but Draco stared intently back at Harjeet. "Yes. I remember. 'The True Guru becomes merciful and then all pains and sins are cut.'"

She nodded. "I wouldn't care what shape you make them, Draco."

His eyes slid down to the ground again. "Thank you, Harjeet."

She gently patted his arm.

Draco returned to their work, making many more lumpy blocks until they slowly began to become balls.

The sky was dark by the time Hermione and Draco left and she pulled her jacket tight against her, wishing there had been a moment she could have used a warming spell before they left. Draco was silent as they walked, hands buried deep in his pockets and head tilted up towards the smog-clouded sky where a few stars still sparkled through.

She wondered what he was thinking. He had found a place where he had once again hurt people but they had cared for him anyway. Redeemed him. Maybe she didn't need to worry about him as much as she thought she did. If he had Harjeet and Samir and their faith maybe he wouldn't crumble back into alcoholism like she half-worried. Maybe she just needed to worry about the pain from the empty space he would leave in her life. Could she call him a coward for leaving when there weren't options? No but they didn't know that. It might be late here but she could use her floo maps to jump back to the West Coast for a few hours in a library before it closed there. (What was this about libraries closing at silly hours like nine at night?) Then she would know if there were options and if she had to fortify her heart for him leaving her.

"Draco?" Hermione asked and he looked down, raising an eyebrow.

She reached out her gloved hand and he took it, squeezing her fingers. She smiled up at him and his eyes softened before tilting back up to the sky.

She wished she could stay with him and stare at whatever he saw up in the heavens but she had been invited to the Gurdwara tomorrow and needed to get in as much studying as she could before she had to sleep. Reluctantly she let his hand go when they arrived at the floo and then made the jumps it would take to get to the West Coast.


	52. The Gurdwara

Hermione stumbled into the restaurant exactly at the time they had all agreed to meet. She hadn't had much energy to dress up but had put some mascara she almost never used and had braided her hair so it would be flat enough to wear the shawl Harjeet was lending her. Other than that, she had followed Harjeet's advice and had worn some jeans and a nice blouse that matched the shawl.

Her research last night had been promising and she had left the California library with a lighter heart but one of the floos she took home was part of a potions shop she had frequented fairly often to buy her regular potions. She stepped out and grabbed her usual potion and was already handing it to the cashier before she thought it through. She stepped back and brushed a piece of her frizzy hair out of her face.

"Oh, sorry," she muttered. "I don't take these anymore… habit." She shrugged. "They are actually a tad addicting."

The cashier folded his burly arms over a pot-belly. "Addicting? It's magic, not opium."

Hermione had been trying to escape unobtrusively but her head snapped up at the last comment. She stepped closer and jabbed her finger into the counter as she said, "Just because it hasn't been labeled an addictive substance yet doesn't mean it isn't harming someone's life." She straightened, tugging on the jacket she knew she would need for the subsequent jumps. "Maybe you need a brain beyond what some government corporation tells you."

She left then. She didn't need an argument; she needed to get away from the potion she wanted even though she knew it was bad. She also needed sleep.

However, instead of sleeping, she spent the first two hours tossing in bed alternatively worrying about Draco's career and fantasizing about going back and getting a potion so all this worry would stop. She finally remembered that she had other ways to manage her anxiety and went through the extensive meditations and eventually fell asleep. She may have gotten five hours of sleep in if she was lucky and that was only because she had skipped every morning ritual she had in favor of flooing straight to WiNY.

Things hadn't been this rough lately and arrivaing bleary-eyed at something she was hoping to enjoy just added a little more resolve to Hermione's desire to come to terms with whatever issues she had from the war so she would stop doing this.

Stifling a yawn, she nursed her cup of tea she had bought next door. Around her, Harjeet and Samir rushed around the kitchen doing things that Hermione couldn't quite grasp in her morning stupor.

"Where's Draco?" Hermione mumbled to Harjeet when she slowed enough for Hermione to catch her.

"Hm?" Harjeet stopped and turned to Hermione. "Oh. He went to get a relation of his." Hermione's heart stopped for a second, imagining Lucius stepping through the kitchen door. "A little boy," Harjeet continued.

Hermione's heart started again. "Ari," she supplied in a sigh of relief.

Harjeet nodded. "He says you two have met."

Hermione agreed and then yawned again. "Sorry," she mumbled.

Harjeet patted Hermione's shoulder. "Draco did say you were a tad of a night-owl."

The back door slammed open and Hermione jumped, maneuvering herself slightly in front of Harjeet, while her hand went to a hidden pocket.

Draco stomped through the hallway into the kitchen and Hermione eased back into her normal stance.

"Draco? What happened?" Harjeet asked, stepping forward.

"Where is Ari?" Hermione added.

Draco glared at both of them before deflating. "He isn't coming." Looking at the ground, he sneered, "His father won't let him." He ignored the rest of their questions and didn't meet their eyes. Instead, he interrupted, "Don't you have something I should carry?"

Harjeet sighed and gestured towards two large pastry boxes sitting on the kitchen counter. "You can help Samir carry one of the laddu boxes."

None of them had a car and so they took the subway to the Gurdwara. It was mostly a straight shot, so they hunkered down in a corner and waited for their stop.

Hermione sat by the window and used Draco's bulk to block her hand as she cast Luna's spell to help block out the crowd. She would have never used it on herself if she had been alone, but with Draco there, even if he was sitting in a stony silence at the moment, she felt safe enough. In fact, she dozed off several times, her head bobbing back or to the side. She had just been jerked awake again by her head rolling off at an uncomfortable angle, when she felt a hand press against her head and force it down until it was resting on Draco's shoulder.

"You are giving me whiplash watching you," he mumbled.

Hermione smiled but drifted off again before she thought of an answer.

She woke up to Draco poking the tip of her nose. She brushed aside his hand and then rubbed at the side of her mouth to check for drool.

"You weren't being an idiot last night and studying for exams that are two month away, were you?" She could feel his voice rumble through his firm and rather bony shoulder.

She groaned and sat up. "I was researching you."

His eyebrow raised and his mouth morphed into a sly smile. "I didn't know you were the stalking type."

She rolled her eyes and punched his shoulder gently. "What would be the point? Your closet seems to shove all your skeletons out without me lifting a finger."

His face fell, and he glared out the window.

Hermione bit her lip, trying to come up with a way to fix what she just said, but Samir leaned towards them and waved a hand. "Come on, you flirts, this is our stop."

From then on, conversation stopped anyway. Even at eight o'clock on a Sunday morning, the subway stops were something that needed complete focus to survive, especially with two fragile pastry boxes full of laddu and a Hermione still given to panicking in crowded areas.

The Gurdwara itself was an unassuming brick building with no outward adornments or anything that even indicated what it was. Hermione followed the rest of the group into the entrance way where there were several groups of people sitting at tables and chatting over paper plates. Besides not being of Indian decent, Hermione and Draco stood out as the only ones in jeans and Hermione was happy Harjeet had let her borrow her scarf because it allowed Hermione to feel like she blended in at least a little with all the bright scarves of the other women. Draco was wearing a gold bandanna that had looked a little seedy out on the street, like he was trying to imitate the gangster style and failing spectacularly by wearing a button up shirt. However, now that everyone around them had their head covered, it didn't look that weird. The gold actually complemented the deep maroon shirt. Draco walked off to another table a little ways off there where other were arranging fresh fruit and other desserts Hermione didn't recognize. She observed the smallish entry way and decided there weren't nearly as many people as she had expected, given how much laddu Harjeet had had them make.

"Are we early?" she asked Draco when he came back from putting down the pastry box for Harjeet to arrange.

"Yeah. Come on." He grabbed Hermione's arm and pulled her towards a smaller room off to the side. "We need to take off our shoes."

Having been warned ahead of time, Hermione had worn some Vans that were easy to slip off her feet. The smaller room was basically a closet full of cubby holes for shoes. She pushed hers into the same one as Draco over his black dress shoes. He wore socks of different shades of gray and Hermione wondered whether she should comment on it. He still seemed in such a bad mood.

She nervously rearranged the shawl over her head. It kept wanting to slip down the back of her hair and down around her shoulders. "Why are we early, Draco?"

Draco finally looked her in the eyes since they left the subway and shrugged. "Harjeet had to get the laddu out for people to eat ahead of time and I figured you would want to be early enough to get a seat close to the door." He stepped up out of the shoe room and returned to Samir and Harjeet's side before Hermione could reply or even thank him. When she followed, Draco was speaking to another man with Samir.

"Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguruji ki fateh," the man said.

"Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguruji ki fateh," Draco said back with painful slowness.

The other man nodded. "Tuhaadaa kee haal hai?"

"Mai Theeke hai." Draco answered, this time speaking with more assurance. "Tuse kiva?"

"Mai Theeke hai," the other man answered, nodding and smiling.

Hermione looked between all of them in bewilderment. "You speak Punjab, Draco?"

Draco glanced at her and nodded slightly. "A little. This is my Punjabi teacher, Balvinder."

"Oh," Hermione said and turned and smiled as she greeted the man.

He nodded back. "Draco is a quick study," Balvinder said with a stronger Indian accent than Amar had. Harjeet and Samir didn't have one at all. "But he lacks the finesse. He speak Punjabi like it is French."

Draco colored slightly at that. "French is my second language. Pardonnez-moi si je parle avec un son romantique."

Hermione, whose French was barely passable, snorted. "Sound of romance? I bet the poor instructor wanted to silenci- duck tape your mouth after the first day."

Draco's face was still a little dull but he smirked a little at that. "I know that's not what you want to do with my mouth."

Hermione couldn't help a fiery blush that warmed her whole face. "Must you, Draco? I'll make sure he knows which tape is the strongest."

The rest of the conversations she didn't participate in much as they were mostly about these people's lives: whose children were going to college or how a business was faring and when the next social event was planned. Hermione picked up a plate and filled it with fruit and several of the dessert-looking dishes, including Harjeet's laddu, which was a little like a churro- soft and sweet but still chewy. That was the thing about being in awkward social situations that had food. Food was an easy thing to turn to instead of actual conversation. She emptied her plate without quite realizing it until she reached for another laddu that wasn't there.

When the trickle of people entering turned into a steady stream, Harjeet gently led Hermione towards the hallway that gave way to a bigger room from which music was coming.

As she walked past Draco he put out a hand and fished with the other hand in his jeans pocket. "Here." He handed her a crumpled five dollar American bill.

A little surprised, she took it and continued to follow Harjeet out. She knew it was meant to be a donation. She had told Draco earlier that she didn't have any small American bills. When Hermione first heard she was going to be coming, she had done some reading but information about Sikhs in general had been sparse and she had had to resort to grilling Draco for what information she could get.

As she followed Harjeet down the long aislethat separated the men from women, she noticed that nearly all the women wore the same tunic and loose pants as Harjeet but in all sorts of bright colors and beautiful embroidered patterns. Harjeet had told Hermione they were called a kurta and salwar. There were some dressed similarly as Hermione in jeans and a nice blouse, which made her a little more comfortable. The men were a little more varied. Some wore traditional kurtas in subdued tans or whites but there were also those in Western suits and even a few who looked like they had come from their blue-collar job and were wearing a gold bandanna like Draco did.

At the front there was what looked like a throne covered by a canopy of rich cloth and gold fringes. She had been told that the book that sat on the throne was the Guru Granth Sahib, the Sikh book of scripture that was treated with the reverence of being the Head of the religion. Hermione followed Harjeet and waited nervously as Harjeet bowed before the Guru Granth Sahib and place her donation in the box. Hermione had been told she didn't have to bow, which was good because it would have been too close to being against some of her beliefs. She inclined her head respectfully and placed her rolled up five dollars into the wood box before turning to join Harjeet again.

Although the rather large room was starting to fill up, it was mostly along the edges of the room where people could rest their backs against the wall. That meant there still was a spot towards the back and along the aisle that was open for Harjeet and Hermione to sit cross-legged. Harjeet shared greetings with a woman holding an infant who stared at them with large brown eyes. The woman lovingly adjusting a mini version of the gold bandanna wrapped around his head and returned to murmuring the hymn to the child as if it were a lullaby.

The room gradually filled up and Hermione followed when the congregation stood and waited until after people were bowing and joined them as they sat down again. There must have been cues for when these were but she couldn't figure out what they were. Occasionally, Harjeet would bend over and explain in English what the hymn was saying.

"Paramaesar thae bhuliaa viaapan sabhae rog. Kaam krodh kaaeiaa ko gaalai, jio kanchan sohaagaa taalai. Fareedhaa burae dhaa bhalaa kar gusaa man n hataae. Dhaehee rog n lagee palai sabh kish paae," the man in front said in a sing-song voice.

"This part loosely means when we forget the Transcendent Lord, we bring illness to our lives, but if we answer evil with goodness and do not fill our minds with anger then we will be free of these illnesses and receive everything good," Harjeet whispered. "Draco always loved this part of the Kirtan when he understood what it meant.

Hermione glanced over to Draco who sat across the aisle a couple people ahead of them. She could still see the side of his face and it did look like he was mouthing the words. Draco had been around people who had always seemed angry and had also seemed to answer any good done to him with evil. Maybe he saw that as the source of the problems he had developed since then? If that understanding had worked the changes she saw in him now, she would have to agree.

Lost in her musings, she was a little hypnotized by the singers' voices and the thrum of the drums and was startled as everyone stood around her again. She quickly stood up and saw that they were taking the Guru Granth Sahib out and the children followed it out in a parade. Hermione had to smile at that, especially at one girl who had a tutu as bright a pink as the scarf pulled over her braids. Those same children came back out and handed out napkins while other children followed and scooped something out of a metal bowl and placed it in the napkin.

"Kara Parshad," Harjeet explained while the children made their way towards them. "It is a blessing from the Guru."

Hermione nodded and reached out her napkin in acceptance of the blessing. It looked like coarse cookie dough and she pinched off a piece with her right hand and ate it like she saw Harjeet do. It wasn't as sweet as cookie dough but it had a pleasant nutty flavor.

When everyone had received the Kara Parshad, people wandered slowly out of the room. The quiet chatter rumbling around them reminded Hermione of when she had gone to church with her parents. Everyone followed some stairs down into a room as equally big as the one above with long strips of cloth running along the floor. The people who had already gone through the line had sat down facing these clothes and had set their plastic trays laden with food on the cloth. The line passed by the opening of a kitchen similar to a soup kitchen and their group received their own plates before joining the growing number of people on the floor. The food was relatively plain with just enough spice to make it good. There was a tangy yogurt-like dish, several bean dishes, fried flatbread, and a salad. Hermione, who had only eaten the desserts that morning, quickly dug into her food.

When she had sopped the last of her meal up with the fried bread, Hermione leaned close to Draco sitting across from her and asked, "What happened with Ari? Didn't he want to come?"

Draco's eyes snapped up at her and he glared. "I didn't get to ask him, seeing as his father decided that I wasn't to associate with him anymore."

"What? Why?" Hermione asked but then paused as she remembered the newspaper article and how worried Draco had been about purebloods reading it. She looked up at him and he nodded.

"He decided I'm not respectful enough for his son and now Ari is going to become a good-for-nothing jerk like me."

"Draco, Ari isn't-"

Abruptly, Draco stood, cutting her off. He thanked Harjeet and Samir and, with a nod to Hermione, left the room.

As Hermione watched him leave she remembered what he said about Ari being the reason he was sober. Maybe he thought the only redemption for himself was saving Ari from a similar fate? What would Draco do now that he thought his one shot at redemption was lost?

She abruptly stood up and then, muttering her apologies, quickly exited the room. Draco wasn't in the entryway and, when she pulled on her Vans and sped out the door, he wasn't in either sight out there either. Frustrated, she returned her shoes to the now empty cubby-hole and made her way back to Samir and Harjeet.

"If Draco wanted to drink, where would he go?" she asked them without introduction.

Harjeet and Samir shared a concerned glance.

"He always came from the block east of us," Samir answered. "Where the street is full of pubs."

"Draco said that making sure Ari didn't go down the same path as him was the reason he went sober and now Ari's father won't let Draco near him."

Samir sighed heavily. "It is unwise to use that sort of reason for sobriety as it rests upon the changeable."

Hermione nodded and hoped that Draco had found other reasons for sobriety. She thanked Harjeet and Samir again and then speed-walked out of the Gurdwara.

* * *

Much gratitude to the readers on WP and FF who helped me check the accuracy of language/religion/culture of these last few chapters! I've only know a few Sikh IRL and tried my best for an accurate representation but please let me know if anything is amiss. Also sorry for butchering french as well but Draco isn't supposed to be good at either of the languages so...?

-Sam


	53. In which there is a pub and confessions

There were too many people on the street. Why were so many people in a pub district this early in the afternoon? Why were they out at all? Hermione shied away from a group of scantily dressed teenagers- no, they must be young twenties if they were here. Why was Draco making her come here? He better not be here. No, he better be here so she could find him and… Strangle him? Hug him? What did that man have in that huge bag and was he looking at her? He was walking past. One glance over her shoulder and he was already past her. There were too many pubs. There were too many people in pubs, especially this early. Would he have picked the Mexican or the grill bar? That lady just brushed past her. Hermione didn't feel any spells. Would she feel a spell? No, she was okay. Pub. Which pub would he go into? She was going to kill him. He better not be dead. Was he drunk? Would he hate himself if he got drunk? What should she do if he was? Kill him. Probably.

None of the pubs looked like places Draco would go. Especially the old Draco just looking for a place to get drunk. Hermione was getting to the point where she was pretty sure she was going to have to turn around and start combing each pub individually when she saw a wooden sign that pointed down a set of unlit stairs. Slytherins were more comfortable underground because of living in dungeons, right? It looked like somewhere to hide, at least. Hermione was sure that was a draw for him. She followed the arrow.

Out of the afternoon sun, walking into the pub was like stepping into a twilight zone where time didn't seem to matter. There was an old telly playing the sports channel in the corner, the smell of cigarettes clung to the room even though there was no visible smoke and there was the distinctive clink of pool balls coming from the other room. There weren't any other women in the room and it felt like any of the men who were sober enough to pay attention were paying attention to her.

"You want something, sweetheart?" the bartender called, not moving towards her. She stuck her chin out and instantly decided she hated this place. The bartender, still wiping his glass, stared at her expectantly.

Hermione ignored him and scanned the occupants of the room. There were few, which suited Hermione just fine, and none of them looked like Draco except one man slumped in the corner, hiding from as little light as there was. Something heavy pressed against her insides. He couldn't have gotten drunk that quickly, could he? They were courting and yet he had run straight to alcohol.

She walked over to the man-that-was-possibly-Draco who, now that she was close enough to see, was wearing a purple shirt. She paused just out of arms reach.

"Draco?"

The man groaned, but it sounded like a Draco groan.

She inched forward, poked him in the shoulder, and cautiously backed up again.

He grunted and twisted his face in his arms towards her. He squinted up at her. "Hermi- the hell." He buried his face into his arms again.

She blinked once at Draco and then turned on the barkeeper. "It can't be two in the afternoon and you gave him all that alcohol? Are you trying to let him kill himself?"

The barkeeper put the glass down with a hard clink and pointed a finger at her. "Now listen, bitch, I didden give him nothing so keep your prissy mouth shut."

"You didn't give him alcohol? Then why is he like this?" Hermione asked, gesturing towards the prone Draco, and feeling panic inching up in her again.

The man scratched his five o'clock shadow and sneered at her. "Why don't you ask him, princess?"

She looked down at Draco but he still had his head buried in his arms. She poked his shoulder and, when he didn't respond, she poked him harder. "Draco, why are you like this?"

"I think… I put a hang-over curse on the entrance."

"You think?" Hermione asked a little sharply but could feel the tension in her chest relaxing.

He wriggled his wand that Hermione could barely see under the counter. "The magic was keyed to me and the curse was my own signature."

She raised an eyebrow. "Yes, I also go around leaving cursed booby-traps for myself and then forgetting about them."

Draco snorted into his arm. "I must have obliviated myself to forget my last defense against intoxication." He peeked out over his arm before saying dryly, "Rather clever."

"And dangerous," Hermione answered. She tugged on his arm. "Come on, I hate this place."

He started to push himself up with his hands and then slumped down with a groan, covering his mouth. "I made it too strong." He stifled a gag. "I hate myself."

She shook her head and then slipped his arm around her shoulder. "Just keep everything in until we get out of here."

"What? No babying like you did for the Boy-who-can't-die and his sidekick?"

"Just stand up. You're too heavy for me to carry."

He slumped a little against her as he used the other arm to push himself up. He was several inches taller than her and so his shoulder and chest pressed against the side of her face rather than her shoulder. She was using both hands to steady Draco so she simply glared at the barkeeper before walking out with a stride similar to a drunken stagger as she tried to counter Draco's weight.

After they managed to navigate the stairs, Hermione leaned against the wall and panted, feeling overly hot in her winter jacket despite the small snow flurries that were biting against her cheeks. "Where should we go?" Hermione asked between breaths. "Your flat?" They needed to talk.

"Ha. No," Draco answered, his face resting against her head.

What? She twisted to try to see his face.

He chuckled darkly. "Hermione, Hermione. It is definitely against courting rules to be in my flat alone with me."

Oh. "Since when did you follow rules?"

He sighed heavily and every movement of his sparkled along her scalp as her hair moved too. "Being alone with you invites a sort of danger I'd rather not test my will to fight."

"Oh." Now her cheeks were as warm as the rest of her. "Not your flat, then," she agreed.

"There's a coffee shop near Samir's. We could stay there until you stop worrying about me."

She rolled her eyes and zipped her jacket open a little to let in some of the cold. "Take more of your weight this time, you'd think you were half-giant by how heavy you are."

Draco snorted and then positioned himself so he was between Hermione and the road. He leaned against her a little and his breath brushed her ear as he spoke. "It's all muscle. Part of my seeker-thing."

She thought about dropping him right then and there.

...

It was the same coffee shop that Hermione had gotten her tea from that morning and they chose a corner booth, Draco letting her take the spot that would let her watch the room. They sat in silence as Hermione waited for him to say something. He didn't.

She took a deep breath. "Are you going to explain why you stormed out on Harjeet and Samir and then went out with the intent to get drunk?"

He raised an eyebrow then stared down at his tea.

"I want to know if this is a pattern that will continue." Would he run away every time something bad happened? Could she trust him if he kept turning to-

"Just like how you turn to a potions bottle?"

She jerked. It had been over a month since she had touched a potion. One very torturous month.

"I've lost any chance to help Ari. I can't be a healer. You don't trust me. If the whole point of being sober is gone, why shouldn't I get drunk?"

"Why don't you think I trust you, Draco?" she asked, scanning her memories for anything that would explain this. "I'm dating you, aren't I?"

He shrugged. "And I can feel you measuring every move I make," he said, staring over her shoulder. "Ever since you agreed to being courted and that stupid newspaper came out."

It was true that ever since he had skipped school, she had wondered how much of the old Draco was there. He had noticed?

"Its like we're back to that stupid deal we made on the YWC rooftop." His eyes turned to her and they were dull. "So, what's your verdict?"

No. She didn't want to hurt him. How had she not noticed how much this was hurting him? She leaned close to him. "Draco, I trust you."

He raised an eyebrow in skepticism before looking back down at his tea. That look cut right to the parts of her that knew she wasn't fully telling the truth. She couldn't quite trust him completely. Did it matter, though? She scooted forward towards him. No. It didn't matter. She wanted to prove it to him. To convince him that she cared about him. To convince herself she didn't need anything else. The only person she had kissed was Ron and their first kiss had been extremely spontaneous in the middle of a battle. Here, she was fighting through her anxiety for every inch closer to him.

She slid her fingers along the outside of his face where his hairline ended. His eyes flicked up to hers, eyebrows pulling together. "Please believe me," she told him. Told herself.

His eyes widened and dipped down to her mouth. She brought her mouth even closer, waiting for him to move one way or the other. Closing his eyes, he tilted his head to close the impossibly small gap between them. Their lips brushed lightly, thrilling and painful.

After a moment, Draco's lips pressed a little harder against hers, his hands snaking up her arms until they pulled at her shoulder blades to press them closer together. It was such an impossible sensation: the harsh wanting in her lips and the sinking in her heart. Shouldn't this have fixed it? Instead it felt like it was fracturing something in her. She pressed harder into the kiss.

Somewhere in all of this, his arms had moved from the back of her shoulders to the front and he shoved her away from him. She had shifted onto her knees to get closer to him and so the push sent her off of her knees sideways and into the table. She gasped as her ribs hit the edge and then sat back to try to untangle her legs.

Draco's head was in his hands, not even looking at her. "I don't need your pity," he growled at the table.

Hermione scoffed as she finally got her legs on the ground again. "What makes you think that was pity?"

He looked up and narrowed his eyes. "It was too ill-timed to be anything else."

She pushed herself up, trying not to hunch over her ribs, and shrugged. Maybe it had been pity. She didn't want to say it out loud, but she was sort of glad that Draco had broken the kiss. She didn't want to start another relationship based on an impulse to fix a broken boy or because of outside expectations. "I trust you, Draco, but I think you are talking about trusting you at a completely different level."

"And do you?"

"I don't know. Not yet." She clenched her hands. "Are you okay with that? Are you going to be okay until we get there?"

He stared at her and traced his bottom lip with a finger. "Will we ever get there?"

"I think so." She remembered Samir's words. "But you can't base your sobriety on whether we will or won't."

He raised both eyebrows. "You going to tell me how much I've got to live for? Sounds a bit like a break-up speech," he said dryly.

She leaned forward, grabbed him by the shoulders, and shook him. "No, I'm going to tell you how much worth you have to be treating yourself this way."

He had stiffened when she grabbed his shoulders and then he knocked one of her hands away. "Even when I can't help Ari? Or anyone else?" The last part was muttered.

She let her hands fall to her sides. "Well… you certainly should try to fix what you can but you can't be obsessed with making your good deeds outweigh your past mistakes on some cosmic scale." She shook her head. "It will never even out. As Christians, we believe that is why Jesus came down and died on the cross to save us from our sins."

Draco rested his chin on a hand. "Maybe that's what that means. 'The True Guru becomes merciful and then all pains and sins are cut.' When you choose the Transcendent Lord's path then your past mistakes are left behind."

She relaxed when she saw him relax and then saw an opportunity to ask something she had been wondering. "Why did you adopt Sikhism?"

He watched the afternoon rush of people for a moment before saying anything. "At first it was just because Samir and Harjeet were good people. Then Samir started explaining things to me. For some things, I wanted them to be true. Other things, they were just better explanations for things that I had already figured out for myself."

"Like what?" Hermione couldn't help but asking when he paused for too long.

Draco smirked at her. "When I first was in that pub, I had this revelation when I was getting completely smashed. All those completely worthless muggles getting drunk next to me, I was just as useless as them. Everyone following the Dark Lord, they were trying to run from that by forcing an arbitrary value system."

Hermione made a small voice of discomfort. She didn't exactly agree and was still uncomfortable with mentions of Voldemort.

Seeing her reaction, he lifted a shoulder. "Well, then I learned about how Sikhs say everyone is equal. I agreed with that. They took it farther than me and said everyone has value." He stared into the distance. "Maybe… maybe I could see that. If Ari has value to me then maybe I was… am like that to someone."

Smiling at his halting speech, she reached out for his hand.

He looked down at her hand, and wrapped it with both of his. "I don't have to tell you that you have value, do I? Only an idiot like me could miss something like that."

She squeezed his hand and gave a watery chuckle. There was a tear streaming down her cheek. She reached up to brush it away but Draco's hand got there first and gently caught it, sliding his thumb along the tear's track and brushing gently underneath her eye. She cupped his hand with her own.

"I'm glad you finally agree," she said a little hoarsely. "We both have value." How strange that him saying that relieved something inside of her. Was she still fighting against those prejudices she met in Hogwarts that she had never completely shook off?

He smiled a small slightly broken smile.

She moved to get a little closer but pain in her ribs caused her to wince.

"What?" Draco sounded alarmed.

She touched the offending spot once and then waved it away. "I just hit my side."

He shifted and gently pulled her up against him so her head was resting on his chest. She snuggled up against him, it was strange how just being in contact with him was so comforting and thrilling. His hand wrapped around her back and gently rubbed the spot on her side she had touched.

"Sorry," he murmured.

"Already forgiven," she mumbled back as her body finally remembered the tiredness of that morning now that the excitement was over. Well, one kind of excitement. It felt a little dangerous to have Draco's hand resting where her ribs curved down into the start of her hips.

They sat there for a while, their breathing slowly becoming synchronized in the rises and falls, and Hermione not really thinking of anything except those breaths. She couldn't remember the last time she had been this at peace without a potion.

Finally, Draco spoke. "Tell me about your research on me."

"Hmm?" Hermione had to pull herself into the world again. After sorting through the files in her head, she pulled this one out. "Oh, well there wasn't very much about this sort of thing in the magical world so I mostly used Muggle cases," she started as a preamble. Then, with Draco occasionally making encouraging noises, Hermione explained the case she would make to whoever said Draco couldn't practice as a healer. He hadn't been convicted of anything, anything he had done had been under duress, and none of it had had to do with the healer's art. This felt nice too, to be able to explain all her thoughts and which books had helped her figure out what. Ron had always just wanted her to get to the point. Somewhere in all this, she had ended up playing with the buttons on Draco's shirt. At the end of it she paused, circling her finger along the outside of a button.

"That was a lot of research," Draco said when he realized she was done. "Th- thank you, Hermione."

"So?" What did he think? Was he going to leave? Did he still want to be a healer?

He sighed, and her head lifted up with his chest. "I think they would have to let me practice with your arguments."

Her heart expanded a little and she started to smile.

"But everyone knows me, thanks to that paper. "The only place I would be able to work would be some backwards town with backwards American wizards because they are the only ones who would be desperate enough to hire me."

Hermione frowned. Prejudice certainly worked strongly either way in the Wizarding community.

"Sleeping is not allowed here," someone said in a snide tone.

Hermione jerked up, ignoring the pain in her side.

The barista had her hands on her ample hips and was glaring at both of them.

"We weren't sleeping," Hermione snapped.

The barista waved her hand. "That's what it looked like."

"Chelsea," Draco said, leaning forward. "You going to judge us for something like this?"

The barista, Chelsea, twisted her mouth in derision. "Get a room, Draco, and get out of here. Your tea is finished."

When Chelsea left, Hermione turned on Draco, who shrugged lazily. "Amar must have told her about what I said to him."

She vaguely remembered him saying something when they had come back from the back alley of the restaurant… had it been about a Chelsea?

"I caught them snogging in the back right before Amar's shift started. I was mostly joking. Amar just seemed so uptight about it."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "It is rather hard to know when you are joking, especially if they don't know you that well."

"Then what would you say to snogging in the back until Chelsea walks in on us?"

"I would say, please tell me you are joking."

Draco snorted and picked up both their empty cups. "Come on, let's get out of here before Chelsea makes any more accusations."

* * *

Again, big shout out to Rajbir Kaur for helping me with these last chapters (and to the ever faithful Fleurdelys21).


	54. In which old things are brought up again

Draco dropped Hermione off at the floo point and then left to walk back to his own apartment. Once he was out the door, she realized she was still wearing his scarf. She hurried out of the shop, looking down both ways of the snow-swept pavement. He wasn't there. She sighed, her breath coming out in a fog against the cold air. She would have to return it tomorrow at school. Tucking the scarf tighter around her neck, she inhaled deeply, storing away his warm scent.

There was a very British curse from around the side of the building, surprising her. Hermione peeked her head around the corner and watched as Draco slammed his fist into the wall. It came away bloody and he cradled it against himself for a moment before he flinched and cocked his fist back for another punch.

"Draco!"

He paused at her voice, the pain-filled anger freezing on his face for several seconds before he could shake it off and replace it with a dead-eyed mask. That wasn't much better in Hermione's opinion.

"Draco, what happened?"

He let his hand fall to his side but his fingers were still working open and shut.

Hadn't they just talked all of this out? Why was he so upset? She reached out towards him and he froze, neither stepping away from her or leaning towards her. "Draco?" When he didn't react she continued to step forward until she could ghost her hand above his cheek. His eyes slid closed, one eyelid shifting shut just a little faster than the other.

Her bare hand finally made contact with his skin. Her fingers were starting to hurt from the cold but it was nothing to the ice of his face. The second she made contact he flinched away but she wasn't sure whether it was due to the cold or something else.

She moved her finger under his chin and tilted his face towards hers. "Please. Tell me whats wrong."

He finally opened his eyes again, his mouth was pulled in a thin line. "I'm a bloody hypocrite and a coward, that's what." His eyes slid away from her as he said it.

She reached out and cupped his wounded hand in hers, stroking his thumb where there wasn't any blood. She shushed him. "That's in the past."

Shaking his head a little, his fingers tightened. "No, Hermione. I've been spouting the wisdom of Sikhism and sobriety and the second things are hard for me I turn around and go straight back to everything I had denounced."

She shook her head. "That's a hyperbole and you know it."

He smirked a sad ghost of his smile but didn't say anything.

"Draco, I'm not going to leave you the second you show you aren't perfect. I know that already. You can't change your past anymore so all I care about is what you want right now. If it is to keep climbing out of this, then I'm here with you. Just like you've been helping me climb out of my own hole."

He sighed but still didn't look at her.

"Don't you get it?" Her fingers squeezed his hard as she tried to find a way to make him understand. To feel what she was feeling. "I care about you. A lot. I'm not looking for an excuse to leave you. I'm looking for an excuse to stay." What a strange sensation that was. It was so very close to what had happened with Ron that it scared her a little. She had always been trying to convince herself to stay with him. But with Ron, it had always been because she had felt pressured from the outside. Here she cared about him and the main barrier was her expectation for perfection. From him and from herself. She knew that. Knew that he felt that expectation from her. It wasn't something she could help. But she was willing to ignore that part of her. Fight it. Because maybe there were some things that were better than perfect.

His eyes finally found hers again. "I guess if there is anyone who could understand where I'm at at this point it would be you."

She held her breath waiting for him to continue.

He brought up his free hand and traced her hairline down to her ear, drinking in the sight. "But if I hate myself so much right now, why don't you?"

"Because I believe you when you say this isn't where you want to be."

He took a step forward so there wasn't any space between them anymore. Instead of using his fingers, his lips were now at the edge of her hair. "Its not," he whispered, sounding lost and heartbroken.

"And I know that this isn't where you'll stay."

"No?" His tone was a little mocking now.

She ignored it. "And because as much as I like you for who you want to be, I also really really like who you are right now."

His hand was very stiff under hers. The blood was hardening but she wasn't sure if it was because it was coagulating or freezing.

"Really?"

"You were right. The seeker thing is hard to resist," Hermione said with a straight face.

He snorted and both of his arms reached around to crush her against him. She felt her back crack a few times and her arms were being pressed against her sides with an uncomfortable pressure. She tried to take a deep breath but didn't have enough space. She let him hug her a little longer despite this and when he finally seemed to be thinking about easing up she gasped, "Draco, too much seeker thing."

He immediately released her and stepped back with a true smile spreading across his face.

She took a deep breath in before he stepped in to pull her back into a hug, much gentler this time, cradling the back of her head with his hand so that it was pressed against his shoulder.

She shivered and burrowed herself into his jacket, trying to drink in his happiness. After awhile, Hermione wasn't sure if her ears were there anymore or had frozen and fallen off and she knew she had to disrupt this, as much as she was loathe to. She started shifting in his arms and Draco's hands gripped tightly onto her shoulders.

She looked up to see him looking off into the distance, the frown getting worse on his face.

"Draco… stop thinking."

He blinked and looked down at her, this time perfectly switching to an easy smirk. Still, she knew what was under that facade.

She sighed. He needed to stop overthinking, but that was exactly what he was going to do if he went home and had all that time to himself. It was what she would do, at least. "We need to fix your hand and make sure you don't have a boxer's fracture. We can go to my pla-"

"Hermione," Draco cut in quickly. "We can't-"

"I'll convince Luna to come home. It's Sunday anyway."

He paused, considered it, and then finally nodded.

…

Luna had been taking afternoon tea at Rolf's but agreed to return shortly afterwards. She met them in WiNY and they all flooed back to the girls' apartment.

Draco awkwardly sat at the edge of the love-seat as the girls bustled around hanging up jackets and putting away purses and the like. On the kitchen table Luna's owl had left that day's paper, which featured another unflattering headliner about Draco and his possible relationship with Hermione. She flipped it over quickly.

"How was Rolf's, Luna?" she asked.

Luna perked up. "Rolf's grandfather, Newt Scamander, was visiting and he believes my theory about dabberblimps!"

"You mean the author of that bleeding-heart magical creature textbook?" Draco asked from the love-seat.

Hermione raised an eyebrow in his direction but Luna put her hands on her hips and said, "My father loves that book more than pudding and used to read from it to me every night."

Draco might have said something along the lines of 'well that explains a few things' but it was too soft for Hermione to be sure. She sent him a dirty look anyway.

At first the conversation was mainly Hermione and Luna catching up on each other's lives with Draco making his usual sarcastic commentary. Hermione was too used to this to do much more than roll her eyes. Then, once they became restless, Hermione pulled out her textbooks. With them scattered across the kitchen table, she and Draco spent an hour or two with their heads bent over the books, arguing about spell origins and situations for this spell or that one. Luna would occasionally pipe in but mainly had her head stuck in the most recent publication of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.

However, it soon became late. Their conversations slowed and Hermione watched Draco's eyelids sink heavier over his eyes. He kept glancing at the fireplace. Hermione still didn't want him to leave. She had seen the far off stares he had when the conversations had lulled and she was sure that meant he was still caught up in his self-defeating thoughts. Sure, he would probably have been fine by himself but she didn't want him to have to be. She wanted him near her. Was that selfish? She decided to be selfish.

"Luna do you know any good movies that came out on VHS recently?" she asked.

Luna looked up from her book. "Hmm… Rolf and I rented a few movies if you'd like to watch one of them." Luna stood up and picked a few thin DVD cases from the TV stand. Hermione was still skeptical about this whole DVD thing. "There is this one about a lawyer who solved a case with her knowledge of hair products. It was very informative of Muggle law practices."

Draco made a 'please save me' look at Hermione.

"Maybe something else..." Hermione responded.

Luna blinked, unoffended. "Then there is this one about a girl and her pet alien and another about a team of multiracial athletes."

They chose the football movie which Hermione regretted as it made her cry. However, her tears went unnoticed as Draco was transfixed by the TV. The second half of the movie his eyes didn't leave the screen and he didn't touch the take-out they had ordered.

"Is that really what happened then?" he asked, Hermione guessed, in reference to the racism that had been portrayed on screen.

"And worse," she responded.

Draco bit his lip and stared off into space for several long moments before saying, "I guess Wizards are just as bad as Muggles. But on that subject… how could I get Muggles to play this football with me?"

She rolled her eyes and pulled herself off of the cushions. "What is with you and violent sports? I'll get some blankets. Was the couch comfortable enough last time?"

He pushed himself up onto the edge of the couch they had been sharing. "Is Luna going to be here in the morning?"

Hermione looked to Luna who rubbed her eyes and yawned. "I don't have to be at work until after Hermione usually leaves for school."

Hermione nodded and left for the linens closet.

It was odd how comforting it was to have Draco in the next room. Even so, she still made sure to set up her wards this time, especially the ones that muffled the sounds coming from her room. She wondered if they should just eat the left over take out or if she should actually bother pulling out their breakfast foods. Her worries were small with Draco safely sleeping on the couch, and it only took her a little over half an hour to fall asleep.

…

The first thing Hermione heard was swearing. Lots of it and at high volumes. She jolted out of bed and grabbed for her wand.

The second thing she realized was that her wards were going off. It wasn't her 'big gun' wards so that meant the intruders weren't actively attacking them… yet. Judging by the words Draco was screaming, it might be a very imminent thing. Hermione rushed out her room, wand at the ready.

Two men had their wands pointed at Draco, who hovered at the edge of the couch. Upon seeing her, Draco gestured towards her and yelled. "Well, ask her, you bloody idiots!"

One of the men turned towards her and Hermione gasped. "Ron? Harry?"

They turned at their names. It really was them. They stood in half-crouched positions, hovering over Draco. One would glance at her and then the other, neither of them willing to completely give up watching Draco. Harry's hair was wild even by his standards and Ron's robes were crinkled to the point that it was hard to find a spot that didn't need an iron.

"Hermione? What is Malfoy doing in your living room?" Harry asked as he stared down the man in question.

"Harry won't let me hex him yet. Tell him I can hex Malfoy, okay Mione?" Ron chimed in.

Hermione shook her head. "Ron, stopping pointing that wand. Draco is here by my invitation."

Ron's wand slowly lowered but he was still sharing death glares with Draco.

Hermione let out an exasperated sigh. "Ron, lower your wand or I will take it from you."

Ron dropped his wand but turned to her with imploring hands. "But, Hermione, it's Malfoy and he is in your flat!"

"Because I want him here!" Hermione all but yelled. "Now both of you tell me why you look like you haven't bathed in days and have somehow traveled across almost half the globe to arrive in my apartment in the middle of the night unannounced?"

Harry and Ron shared a glance before turning back to her.

"It's Auror business, Hermione," Harry said.

She raised an eyebrow.

Harry glanced behind him at Draco, still perched behind them, and then raised both of his eyebrows.

"Fine. Harry and Ron, come explain what this is about. Draco, please stay on the couch until we figure this out."

Draco tilted his head and made an annoyed noise. However, at a pleading expression from her, he leaned back into the couch. "As you wish, Hermione."

She smiled gratefully and then all but pushed her two friends into her bedroom. Behind her friends' backs she mouthed 'thank you' and Draco gave her a lazy smile back that warmed her up. She regretfully turned her back on him and entered her room.

Once the door had closed, both of them spoke at once.

"You let him call you Hermione?"

"Why the bloody hell is Malfoy here?"

Hermione sighed and gestured for them to sit on her bed while she paced.

After a few moments, Harry asked, "Well?"

She stopped pacing at stared at him. "Well, what, Harry? You still haven't explained why you two were in my living room."

"Ah." Harry looked down at his hands, examining the palms and knuckles, before he finally said, "Well, that's because we followed the snakeheads here."

She had been expecting something but that didn't stop her throat from closing up a little at the news. "How? Where? Why?" she asked.

"We finally caught up to them in Morocco. One of the members of the pureblood family resisted enough to distract the snakeheads while we put a tracker on them but now the girl from that family is dead. The magical tracker she allowed us to place is now in New York. We won't be able to figure out where exactly in New York until it stops moving."

Hermione leaned against her wall and then slid down so she was sitting on the ground. "They killed someone?" she asked.

Harry nodded gravely. "She struggled when they tried to use her as a hostage and then when we took advantage of the distraction, they retaliated by killing her."

She took a deep breath. "It didn't sound that bad on the phone."

"Each time they move on to a new family, their tactics increase in ruthlessness and their spells grow darker. We've got several people in the hospital with curses on them we have yet to lift. This was the first death but it is clear they have no qualms about using Unforgiveables now."

Hermione let her head fall into her hands. "What do they want? Have you figured out any patterns?"

Ron sat up. "They only approach blood traitors now. Probably figured out purebloods wouldn't take em. At first, when we'd show up they'd just tuck tail and go south, attacking the nearest 'blood traitor' till we caught up. Harry is right, though. They are getting more aggressive."

Harry nodded. "They were sticking around longer and longer and then they weren't running at all when they saw the Aurors. We figured it was going to lead to a face off between us and them but now they've broken their pattern."

"Now we have to figure out why the bloody Snakeheads haven't gone south to Algeria or something," Ron said. "Hermione, we need to know who they would see as blood traitors."

Harry looked at Hermione hopefully but she merely sighed and pushed herself up onto her feet to pace again. "Ron, this place isn't like that. They don't value pureblood here like they do in England." She ran a hand through her hair and realized her hair was probably achieving Einstein-levels of frizziness. She patted it a little and then decided she didn't care. "There is Rolf and the Scamander family I suppose. Though they are still caught up in all the weird pureblood traditions."

"Would the snakeheads consider them blood traitors?" Harry asked.

Hermione shrugged. "I don't see any reasons why they might."

Ron's stomach growled loudly and they all looked at it.

"Hungry?" she asked.

Harry nodded and Ron said, "Thank Merlin. I've been starving for days! Tell me you've got a roast and gravy."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Ron, you are talking about two busy women who have no time to spend in the kitchen."

When they exited her room, Draco was already sitting at the kitchen table with Luna, sharing an ice cream cake she had bought recently.

"Luna?" Hermione asked hesitantly. "You're up?"

Luna plucked a cherry from Draco's slice and bit into it. "It was rather hard to sleep once all the excitement started. Besides, someone had to keep Draco company eating the pudding." She popped the rest of the cherry into her mouth. "Good morning, Harry, Ron. Or is it still night? You two seem to be apt at making unconventional entrances."

While she was distracted, Draco scooped his spoon through her frosting and stuck it in his mouth. Harry and Ron greeted Luna sheepishly while still glaring at Draco.

Hermione frowned. "Right. Who wants take-out?"

Once they had a plate of whatever they took a fancy to at… whatever time it was now, Hermione started up the conversation. "Luna, do you think that the snakeheads would consider the Scamanders blood traitors?"

Luna tapped another cherry against her lips. "Hmm… the Scamanders are very traditional when it comes to many traditions and to many that appears as adherence to blood related bigotry that the snakeheads seem to idealize. It is hard to understand the thinking of an extremist like that, though." Her eyes slid over to Draco. "Maybe Draco would know?" she asked innocently.

The rest of the table looked to Draco who glared at them from half-lidded eyes. He pulled his cup of tea towards him and then shrugged. "Luna would definitely be considered a blood traitor so by fraternizing with her that might extend to Rolf Scamander."

"Don't you spend a lot of time with Rolf's family?" Hermione asked as she dished some chow mein into a bowl. If she didn't get any now she wouldn't get any ever, knowing Harry and especially Ron.

Draco shook his head. "It's still a stretch."

Ron set down the carton of fried rice that he had commandeered. "So you've got a better idea?" he asked agressively.

Draco took in Ron's stance with a slow blink and then shrugged one shoulder lazily. "There are few other pureblood families still here. The Blacks, Averys and Rosiers have branches out here but none of them could be considered blood traitors by any stretch."

Harry nodded his head. "Then we'll assume it is the Scamanders and set camp there. Luna, will you go ahead to warn them?"

Luna bobbed her head and disappeared into the fireplace shortly thereafter. Then everyone got up and started making preparations for when they would make the floo trip as well. Everyone but Draco. In between him picking up the cartons and dishes, Hermione caught some very dirty looks shared between him her two friends. Even if the snakeheads didn't target the Scamanders that night, Hermione was worried she was still going to have a war on her hands.


	55. In which there is a Newt

Hermione already had her purse packed with the essentials and was deciding if anything she had stored in her cupboards was worth bringing with them. She had stored food just in case anything happened or she was trapped in her home but most of it didn't seem like the things that Harry, Ron, or Draco (for that matter) would be willing to eat. Canned sardines, while nutritious, were not a high demand food staple.

As she stared at her shelves, she listened for the beginning of a scuffle out in the living room. Harry and Ron and changed their opinions about Draco very little and Draco, while definitely a better man than he had been, had already proved that he would not forego barbed insults if provoked. Harry seemed okay with just dark glares but Ron seemed to be unable to not say any of the mean-spirited things that popped into his head. As well, Draco seemed unable to not to point out the idiocy in Ron's statements. There had already been a couple exchanges of words that only had stopped short of physical violence because Hermione had stepped into the middle of it.

In fact, given how the night had been going, the silence was scaring Hermione a little. She gave up on the canned food and went out into the living room. Ron and Harry were there, organizing the equipment they had brought and abandoned once they had seen Draco there. Speaking of Draco, he was no where to be found. Hermione scanned the living room again, checking for his shoes sticking out from underneath the couch. Still nothing.

"Where is Draco?" she asked.

Ron and Harry looked at each other. Harry shook his head and muttered something under his breath.

"Well?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips.

"He went that way," Ron said, pointing down the hallway. "Hiding, probably. The coward."

Hermione pressed her lips together and followed the hallway down to Luna's room.

"Better to just leave him alone, Herms." Ron's voice echoed down the hallway.

She ignored him. It was unlikely that Draco went into Luna's room and, given the fact that Harry and Ron wouldn't have let Draco near Hermione's bedroom, that only left the spare bedroom. She knocked and then entered into the room always magicked to be dark.

Although she was transitioning from the poorly lit hallway, this room was even darker and Hermione was night blind for several seconds. She hadn't told Luna, but she hated this room for that exact reason. She had not come back since she had used the spell that made it so dark.

There was a shuffling off to her left.

"Draco?" she asked very quietly, hoping it was, indeed, Draco.

"Seems like this is the only room to get a little quiet here," he said.

"Just watch for the fish tanks on the floor."

"Yeah," Draco said dryly. "I, unfortunately, discovered that already."

"Oh dear." She couldn't quite hide the laughter in her voice. She was beginning to make out the edges of furniture and so moved towards Draco. "Did you both survive?"

"Everything but my shoe. I don't think it will ever be the same and we'll have to give it a funeral."

Hermione snorted.

"A very proper funeral for they have served me well and didn't deserve to meet their end in a dirty fish tank while I hid from my girlfriend's overprotective friends."

She sighed. "Sorry about them. I'm sure once they see how much you have changed they will come around. And it isn't dirty, it's just full of algae."

He made a noncommittal hum. "I don't think my shoe is going to feel better knowing it's demise was by algae."

"Really, they aren't so bad once you get used to them."

"If you can get used to imbeciles," Draco muttered back. "Unless you were talking about the algae. Which I might have an easier time adjusting to."

"Can't you play nice?" Hermione pleaded, searching through the air with her hand to try to find him.

He grabbed her hand, pulling her forward by it. "I am playing nice."

She felt along his chest with her freehand to get her bearings and then tucked herself under his arm. "I know you are trying. Thank you for that at least."

"What else could I do?" Draco asked with a sigh, turning so that he enveloped her with both arms in a tight hug.

They stood there, Draco slightly swaying them and Harry and Ron's noises drowned out by the fountain Luna had installed somewhere in the room. Some of the stress of the night started to slip off of her.

"Do we have to go back?" she asked, holding hard onto the back of his shirt. "We could just stay here."

Draco chuckled. "Forever?"

"Humans can survive off of algae."

"I can't," he said, but his hands tightened on her arms. "Besides, how long do you think we have before Boy-Wonder barges in here?"

"Really? Well, actually, it would probably be Ron."

"We'll be okay," he said a little more gently. "We'll have a head start on the snakeheads and those idiots have finally been reunited to the brain of their trio."

"I'm sure that was supposed to be comforting..."

He pulled her a little closer. "You'll be fine. Potter will rally all his little loyal Aurors and it will be gone before you can blink."

"Hmm..." In her experience, it never worked that way.

There was a flash of green light out in the hallway still visible even through the darkening spell. Hermione stiffened against Draco. "Already?" she whispered as her wards went off. Draco squeezed her arms once more before stepping back.

There were exclamations from the other room, but Hermione couldn't understand them. She palmed her wand. How had the snakeheads found them so quickly? Had they reversed the tracking spell? That would take some amazing magic. She started making her way to the door, feeling Draco follow her. He uttered a muffled curse and then there was some sloshing of water. He really didn't have luck with the fish tanks.

They paused at the edge of the door, leaning only far enough into the hallway so that they were no longer affected by the darkness spell.

"Hey! Ow, ow. Stop hitting me!" Harry was saying.

Hermione glanced over to Draco who shrugged. Why would they hit him when they had wands?

Harry continued, "Just think about this: it was an Auror mission. Hey, again with the hitting, your boyfriend is not a punching bag!"

Draco's eyes widened. "The she-weasel?" he mouthed.

Hermione raised her eyebrow. "Maybe?" she whispered back, not bothering to correct him.

"Yeah, why would we bring you with us on an Auror mission? You're being a stupid girl."

Hermione quickly drew a breath in with anger at Ron's comment.

"I'm being stupid? You have no room to talk, Ron. You've chased every girl on my team even when every single one of them makes you look like a wuss. Seriously, do you ever get a clue?"

Now certain of their newest intruder, Hermione inched her way along the hallway.

"You poisoned them against me!" Ron whinged.

Hermione cleared her throat as she entered the living room and everyone looked at her. Ginny still had one of her fists on Harry's chest and Harry's hands were on her arms, probably trying to hold her at arm's length. Ron was near them, arms folded.

"Hermione!" Ginny said, pulling away from Harry a little. "Tell them they should have brought me!"

Hermione looked between Ginny's distraught face and Harry and Ron's grimaces. "Ginny, they've got a point. This is an Auror mission."

"You're not an Auror but you're already being dragged into this," Ginny said, hands on her hips and her face growing red.

"I'm involved in the case."

"Yeah, 'involved.'" Ginny used air quotes. "You're only involved in this as much as I am and yet you weren't asked to sit on the sidelines..." she trailed off and stared over Hermione's shoulder.

Hermione could feel Draco's body heat behind her and she stood a little taller.

"Bloody hell!" Ginny yelled, pointing at Draco. "What is he doing here?"

Hermione sighed, rubbing her forehead. "I invited him over."

Ginny made a disgusted face. "Why?"

Hermione opened her mouth and then closed it, pressing her lips together. There were too many variables here. Harry and Ron were leaning in to watch the fireworks, maybe even waiting to add a couple of their own, and Draco was just a fuse waiting to catch a stray spark. Hermione crossed the room and looped her arm into Ginny's. "Come here." Hermione led her across the rest of the room and around the corner into the kitchen.

Once out of ear shot, Hermione whispered, "You are being unreasonable with your expectations of Harry."

Ginny glared.

Hermione groaned internally. "Are you trying to corner Harry into a bad spot? I know you are still smarting from him leaving you at Hogwarts while he hunted horcruxes but this is not the same thing and you know it. There is no logical reason why you should be involved in this case."

Ginny stomped her foot. "I'm the only one who knows enough about the purebloods to help understand the snakeheads!"

"What about Ron or Draco?"

"Ron never payed attention to any of that and Harry will never listen to Malfoy. I don't get why you are trusting him at all. Really, are you that stupid?"

Ignoring the comment about Draco, the rest made sense in a sideways, desperate sort of way. Hermione could understand Ginny wanting to come and be involved, even if it was just because Harry didn't think she should be involved. However, Hermione fervently wished Ginny had stayed home. It was already complicated enough with the two boys and Draco. She didn't need to throw in whatever weird relationship dynamics Ginny and Harry had yet to figure out. That being said, what was done was done. Ginny was here now and if she was sent home, Hermione had the feeling that it would just widen the gap between her and Harry. Ginny did have a point. If they were going to pull Hermione on this case then they left themselves wide open to pull on other people. Ginny really wasn't that much of a stretch when everything was looked at from that angle.

Of course, that was ignoring a whole lot of other angles, but that was always how they worked anyway, wasn't it? Hermione took a deep breath and then gave Ginny a look. "Will you be okay if things get ugly?"

Ginny turned a hard look on her and then raised an eyebrow.

Hermione didn't need a prompt to think of all the instances where Ginny had been able to do just that, up to and including the Hogwarts Battle. Hermione would have given the same look to anyone asking her that question. "Fine, stupid question. Just don't get killed or Harry will never forgive himself."

With Hermione on her side, Harry didn't fight Ginny as hard on staying and helping. Once it was announced that Draco was coming, Harry's arguments were lost in both his and Ron's vehemence that Draco not join them in any form. Hermione, of course, ignored them.

...

Even in the middle of the night, the Scamander's home was light and cheery- the rooms full of white walls and decorated with light greens and blues. That wasn't to say it wasn't a little intimidating. The main light sources were huge chandeliers that hung from ceilings with ornate trimming. When they were graciously met by Rolf's father and grandfather, they were invited to sit on vintage sofas near an equally ornate fireplace. All of the Scamanders were well dressed, despite the late hour, making Hermione feel a little common and scruffy still in the sweats that served as her sleep wear.

Once the whole party had settled on the furniture, Rolf's father started to make introductions, but Rolf's grandfather, Newt, waved them away.

"It's almost five in the morning, Dirk, no need to stand on ceremony here. Besides," -Newt cast an eye over the group and smiled crookedly, a light glinting in his eyes- "most of us know each other by reputation at the very least."

Dirk made an uncomfortable noise, tugging at the dress robe that made Hermione understand where Rolf got his taste for odd patterns that looked several decades old. Maybe they were hand-me-downs or whatever the upper crust called hand-me-downs. Heirlooms?

Newt was dressed in a muggle overcoat in a rather violent shade of pink. He used his cane to push himself into a straighter sitting position and observed his son with amusement. "Fine." He quirked his head and took in the room at large. "Celebrities of England, this is my son and grandson. My son has taken more to the banking of magical monies but my grandson has followed in my footsteps and is already starting an illustrious career as an Magizoologist."

Rolf made an uncomfortable cough and Luna squeezed his hand, smiling proudly at him. Hermione wasn't quite sure what she had been expecting as Rolf's heritage but he was an odd mix of his father's stuffiness and grandfather's strangeness. Maybe all Magizoologists were strange. The only ones Hermione had met were sitting in this room.

At Newt's announcement, Draco leaned over to Hermione's ear and asked dryly, "Celebrities?" She turned and shushed him. Newt might seem a little peculiar, but she didn't want to stand out as being rude to someone as spectacular as the champion of magical beasts she had used as a model for some of her own crusades.

However, it was too late and they had caught the attention of Newt. He gave them another odd look that appeared to be a mix of amusement and befuddlement. It appeared to be a look he often had, judging by the deep wrinkle lines in his face. "Ah, Draco Malfoy. Yes, becoming a bit of celebrity in your own right. Big fan of your recent exposés, especially the ones with the lovely Hermione Granger."

Hermione could feel her cheeks heating up and Draco cursed under his breath.

Dirk cleared his throat. "Yes, thank you, father. Now, Harry Potter. Harry, if I may." He followed this with a self-deprecating smile. "I understand you have some rather important information to share with my- the Scamander household?"

Harry took his cue and explained the snakehead situation. Hermione, having heard and rehashed this already and starting to feel the effects of the late night catching up with her, leaned against Draco. She slipped in and out of a half sleep until Harry finished with, "and we haven't been able to determine the target, but you seem like the most likely because of your association with Luna."

Dirk gave his father a look, shaking his head. "While we appreciate your concern, Harry, it seems like rather flimsy evidence to be going on."

Newt leaned over and patted his rheumatoid-mangled-hand on Dirk's leg before turning to Harry. "What he means to say, Mr. Potter, is you are welcome to stay the night and then pick our brains when we have had enough sleep to be of actual use."

Dirk hmphed and his son looked embarrassed. Rolf quickly added, "all of you are welcome. We can transfigure some beds or whatever is needed strategically."

It was quickly decided that the most efficient option would be to stay the night at the Scamanders and plot the next morning. Dirk left to make preparations and left his father behind as he had fallen asleep during their conversation, his curly white hair falling into his face as his head lolled a little.

Hermione squinted at something green poking out of his pink coat. "Is that... a bowtruckle?" she asked.

Luna smiled and wiggled her fingers at the little stick-like creature. "Yes, the runts grow overly-attached to their caretakers."

The bowtruckle made squeaky noises at Luna, who said, "You _are _small for a full grown bowtruckle." It made more noises and then crawled across Newt's sleeve so that it was closer to Luna. She tipped her head to the side. "Hmm... I do agree that Newt is pretty special."

Rolf, who had been watching this exchange, said, "Bowtruckle noises don't translate into human language."

Luna smiled a little and stretched her finger out to the bowtruckle. It paused at the end of Newt's sleeve and examined Luna's finger closely. Finally, it reached out a tentative limb, testing the new surface, before slowly climbing onto Luna's hand.

"There," she said. "Hello again, friend."

It squeaked at her.

She threw a sly smile over at Rolf. "Well, he isn't the type to indulge in conversations like his grandfather."

Rolf pushed his glasses up his nose and gave a huff in response.

Luna giggled.

"Well, it seems Luna has found her people," Ron muttered.

Harry smiled. "I'm glad."

"People might be the wrong word, Ron. Though I suppose it is a rather broad term if it includes you," Ginny snapped at Ron, who had wormed his way in between Ginny and Harry on the equivalent of a love seat. It was a tight fit.

Hermione watched all of this through half-lidded eyes and then snuggled deeper into Draco's shoulder.

"And Hermione, stop with all this mushy-romantic stuff with Malfoy, it is seriously making me want to gag!" Ginny said, glaring in their direction.

"You are just jealous," Draco said, pulling Hermione closer to him.

By that time Hermione didn't really care about trying to control the fall out and so let the comment stand.

"Oh?" Ginny said, leaning forward. "You must be dreaming if anyone but the clinically insane would want to be near you."

Hermione couldn't help the flinch those words elicited. Draco squeezed her shoulder.

"I'd say the same to you, Weasley, but we've already established that Harry's mental capabilities are... questionable."

"Don't bring me into this," Harry muttered, but he slumped back into the couch.

"Besides we all know that this shrew-ness is just because of dealing with your cock-blocking brother," Draco said snidely.

"Really, Draco," Rolf coughed just as Ginny lurched to her feet.

"Oi!" Ron said, starting to get up too but Harry dragged him back down, using the momentum to lever himself up to grab onto Ginny's arm. "Ginny," he warned.

"Yes, Ginny," Draco mocked, pulling Hermione farther on top of him until she was practically in his lap. "Having a hard time dealing with the inadequacies you feel seeing what a true power-couple looks like?"

"Draco," Hermione murmured. "Please."

"You are all really increasing the Nargle and Pokuele population in here," Luna muttered sorrowfully.

Draco looked down at Hermione and brushed a piece of hair out of her face. "Yeah, okay."

It was that moment that Dirk chose to return and the tension in the room eased considerably as he starting instructing people to different parts of the stately room. The men would be situated in the front room and the women would be back towards the kitchen (and away from Rolf's room, Dirk was quick to point out).

As everyone separated, Draco lingered next to Hermione. He slipped his hand through her hair so that it pressed against her neck and back of her head. "It's going to be okay, Hermione," he whispered.

She looked up and nodded with a smile.

"Come on, love birds," Ginny said from the hallway.

Draco gave her a two-fingered salute and then leaned down to kiss Hermione's forehead. She responded by giving a quick kiss to his jaw line, the day old stubble zinging along her lips. He smiled down at her before leaving to follow the rest of the men. She watched him go before turning to go after Ginny.

...

A/N

Crazy there are less than ten chapters left until the end. I'd love to hear what you think of the new story elements! What do you think of old man Newt?

Love, Sam


	56. In which they stay the night

When Hermione joined the other girls, Luna had somehow found a thunderbird chick (or maybe it had found her) and they were both curled up on an engorgio-ed sofa. A soft nasally snore was coming from their direction but Hermione couldn't tell whether it was the chick or Luna.

Ginny was sitting cross-legged on another sofa, a pillow hugged to her stomach. "So," she said, staring at Hermione with shrewd eyes. "You've got some explaining to do."

Hermione slumped down onto her own bed that was transfigured from a chair. It was surprisingly comfortable. Whoever had spelled it was skilled. She turned her head and pressed her face against the soft pillow and thought about pretending that she hadn't heard the question. However, after a few seconds, the guilt of ignoring Ginny drove Hermione to roll over and face her.

"So," Hermione prompted, steeling herself.

Ginny leaned forward, resting her elbows on the pillow, and then squinted her eyes. "You? Malfoy? What is going on?"

Hermione sighed, her fatigue setting in heavy against her. "I don't have to explain anything."

"But he seems to... truly like you?"

"Hmm."

"It's got to be some kind of trap. Why are you going along with it? How can you stand him?"

Hermione pulled the pillow over her ears and muttered into the cushion. "As much as I want to have a heart to heart about Draco's personal growth and our relationship and all of that… can you please let me sleep?"

When there was no reply, Hermione drifted off to sleep only to be quickly interrupted by Ginny saying, "Even if he has changed, he is still Malfoy. Can he ever change enough?"

Hermione rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. As tired as she was, she still wanted Ginny to understand if she was genuinely trying to understand. "I still hated him when we first met. I insulted him most times I saw him and it took I a while but I finally realized he wasn't going to insult me back."

"Ever?" Ginny asked.

"Well, he made fun of my studying or my hair. Things Ron and Harry have been doing since Hogwarts. He never said mudblood and was pissed when someone else started to call me that."

"Really?" Ginny didn't sound convinced but she did sound a little curious. That was a good start, Hermione supposed.

"Really. The more I saw of him, the more I realized that he wasn't the old Draco."

"Yeah, but not hating him and letting him flirt with you like that are two different things."

"We're dating." Hermione said flatly, stomach a little tight as she waited for Ginny's response.

There were a couple moments of silence before Ginny said very loudly, "What?"

Hermione sat up quickly. "Shhh!"

Luna shifted over and the thunderbird stretched a wing over her leg. The rest of the house was silent.

Ginny turned back to Hermione. "Okay, I understand not wanting to date my brother. He's a git sometimes. But Malfoy? That's ten times worse!"

Hermione shook her head. "As I said, I don't have to explain myself to you. How about you give him a chance? Decide once you've seen what he's like now."

"You're completely nuts, Hermione. There's nothing that can change my mind on that."

Hermione shook her head and then curled up on her bed again, her back to Ginny. "Yes, well, goodnight."

"Yeah, night, nutter."

Hermione couldn't have been asleep for more than an hour or two when she was jerked wide awake by a nightmare of the skinheads invading the Scamanders' home and almost everyone dying in the resulting skirmish.

She lay in bed waiting for her heart to calm as she repeatedly reminded herself that it had just been a nightmare and none of it had actually had happened. The sectumseptra that split open Ron's arm in her dream had looked just like when he had splinched it, blood rushing out from the many arteries that had been severed. He had been dead before she reached him, skin cold. She had lost Draco among the black robes of the skineaters, who all had masks that looked too similar to the deatheaters. She had been afraid to look for him, unsure if she would stumble across his dead body or find him by recognizing his hair underneath a mask. She blamed Ginny and their ruddy conversation about Draco.

What if the snakeheads had actually been able to track them here? What would happen? It was hard to tell what was just the rustling of feathers or squeaks of the bowtruckle and what might actually be a skinhead sneaking about. She lay still for several more minutes but she still couldn't tell. Right now it would have been nice to have a dreamless sleep or at least a little something for anxiety. She wondered if the Scamanders had any and the idea made her little thirst for a potion increase.

Sighing, Hermione got up and wandered to the back of the house to check for breaks in the wards. Would it really be that bad if she took a potion right now? She needed her energy to deal with the threat when it came, not to go wandering the halls uselessly in the early morning hours.

Would it be just one? A little part of her asked. Once she allowed herself one, it would be so easy to justify the next one and even easier the next one. How long were they going to be waiting for the snakeheads? What happened if it took weeks for the confrontation to come? If each night she justified taking a potion because of her anxiety, then she would have no magic when the time came that she actually needed it.

No, she couldn't take anything. She wouldn't.

Deciding so definitely helped ease the intensity of her wanting, but it was still there. She set it aside. She could ignore this just as she had learned to ignore the teeth of hunger that clawed at her stomach while they were on the run. It wasn't any different, even if it felt like it.

Checking the wards was a much bigger feat than when she had done it at her own apartment. There it had a been a few minutes or maybe a little more if she had decided to check them again. Here, the challenge of a huge home and not knowing her way around both compounded to make it take at least an hour before she found her way back to where Luna and Ginny were sleeping. However, by that time, sleep had completely fled her. Hermione found her way back to the dining room and watched as the sky turned from black to an ever brighter progression towards dawn.

The Scamanders and Draco were right. The skinheads weren't going to come here. The skinheads would have had to come to the States for something big and attention grabbing. Something must have happened over here that would have drawn their attention. Most likely in the papers.

What had been in the papers lately? She hadn't noticed anything past Draco's multiple appearances amid speculations about being involved with her. A muggleborn.

Hermione was tempted to hit her head. Maybe it wasn't that attention grabbing on this side of pond but it certainly would be on the other side.

The skinheads were after Draco. She was completely daft. They all were.

Hermione had to fight to breath as panic started filling up her chest. She hugged her knees to her chest and rocked back and forth. What could they do? How could she convince Harry and Ron to try to keep Draco safe?

"What's wrong?"

Hermione jumped off of her chair and was halfway across the room before she realized that the voice had been Draco's.

She stopped and turned towards him, pocketing her wand. "Draco! Don't sneak up on me."

He sat down at the table she had been at and placed two cups of tea on the table. "Didn't mean to. Come sit."

"They're coming after you."

He frowned at her as she slowly walked back to the table.

"The snakeheads are going to try to kill you," she said.

Draco's face froze for a few seconds before he shrugged. "I'm not that big of a deal. Besides, how would they even know I was a blood traitor or where to find me?"

"The newspapers."

He raised an eyebrow and took a sip of his tea. "That accused me of being a deatheater, not the other way around."

Had he not read the other articles? They were hard to miss, being on the front page. Hermione started to have a suspicion. "But there were the others." His facial expression didn't change so she continued, "The ones speculating about a relationship between me and you." What they had between them was still so tentative that just bringing it up charged the air between them. She was still unsure of how he may react to a public announcement of their potential relationship.

He swore.

Hermione winced a little.

"I didn't want my relationship to be first announced in the gossip papers," he groaned. "Mother is going to be furious."

Hermione winced again. Had he planned to announce their relationship at all, then? She had thought this courting thing meant he had been serious about... everything. "Is she going to be angry about our relationship, then?"

Draco had been staring off into space, rubbing his chin. "Hmm?" he said and then blinked. "Oh, no. No," he emphasized the last 'no' and reached up to grab her hand. "She has known since Christmas, I promise."

"Christmas?" Hermione asked and sat down. That was longer that she herself had known.

He nodded. "It's the most she has reacted to anything for awhile now."

Hermione bit her lip and Draco reached out, pressing a finger against her lip and putting pressure until it slipped out from underneath her front teeth. Hermione gulped and her cheeks burned. How could he do those sorts of things so casually? She still didn't understand.

"Don't do that," he whispered softly, his finger still on her bottom lip. "It's a good thing she cares. I had to argue quite a bit so that she wouldn't come here with her daft notions and scare you off. I wasn't sure at that point if we would even be possible."

"Is that when you got the rings?" she asked, looking down at the one she still had on her right hand, unable to look while his fingers lingered on her face.

His hand left her lips and pushed the extra mug towards her. "How much sleep did you get?"

She shook her head. "Maybe a couple hours. You?"

He shrugged and picked up his mug. "A little more than that."

They both sipped their tea and watched as dawn gave way to sunrise.

Soon there were noises in the kitchen, and they both looked up to see that they were being joined by a very old woman in an elegant floral dressing gown. She had a tea tray floating in front of her with her wand and leaned heavily on a cane with her other hand.

Draco stood up and caught the tray from the air and placed it gently on the dining table in front of where the old woman stood.

"You must be Mrs. Scamander," Draco said, taking her hand in his and bowing over it. "I'm Draco Malfoy. Thank you for your hospitality to all of us even at the extremely early hour we chose to intrude upon it."

The woman nodded her head in return and then tucked some of her steel gray bob behind her ear. "Mr. Malfoy. We would love to have you and your friends here, even though the circumstances are unfortunate."

It was still so strange to see Draco interacting in this formal manner and Hermione found herself smiling. At least, she was until Mrs. Scamander turned to look at her.

"Ah, Miss Granger."

Hermione still had her cup of tea in her hands and her legs drawn up underneath her. She quickly placed the tea on the table and as untangled her legs, Draco pulled the chair out to give her room to stand up.

Once she was facing Mrs. Scamander, she didn't know what to do. She wasn't supposed to kiss it like Draco had, was she. "Erm…" She pulled up her jumper so she could shake hands but Draco pushed her head forward.

"Just bend your head a little," Draco muttered at her, his face reddening.

"Oh!" Hermione turned towards the old woman again and curtsied a little. "Mrs. Scamander. Thank you for your hospitality."

Draco groaned a little and the woman, who had been rather solemn faced up to that point, had a smile slowly grow across her face.

"Oh, I did it wrong again?" Hermione muttered, biting her lip.

"No matter, we aren't much for those sorts of formalities," Mrs. Scamander said, gesturing towards the table. "Please, tell me what I missed. The two Scamander men decided in their chauvinistic chivalry that we women wouldn't be included in late night scheming."

Hermione brightened at that speech and decided she rather liked this Mrs. Scamander. "There wasn't much scheming, actually. I only realized this morning that the probable target is Draco" -she gestured towards him just as he was starting to drink some tea and he looked awkwardly up- "and not your household as we originally thought."

So Hermione explained the whole situation again, pausing when Mrs. Scamander went to get scones and clotted cream. "My husband never lost the taste for it," she explained as she brought them out and Hermione silently blessed the zany old man for it.

Just as they were finishing up with the explanations and the scones, there were more sounds in the kitchen. It turned out it was Ron and Harry who had been up for a few hours plotting Auror logistics. Awkward introductions were skipped because they blew ignorantly through it straight into business talk. Hermione was a little relieved. These pureblood traditions were nothing but awkward. Harry and Ron were brought up to speed on what Mrs. Scamander knew and added a few things that had been missed.

"I do believe that Hermione's conclusion is correct," Mrs. Scamander said at the end of it and Harry and Ron looked at each other.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Scamander, what conclusion?" Harry asked.

"Why, that Draco is the focus of this terrorist group. I would try to liaison with Auror Yarbrough and not Holley. Auror Holley wasn't very good at collaboration when I was still working there a few years back."

Harry did a double take of the old woman. "You were an Auror?"

"One of the best," Newt said as he limped into the room.

She looked over her shoulder and smiled up at him. "I've saved you some clotted cream."

He squeezed her hand and sat down next to her, drawing towards him the plate she had made. "Did I hear you had figured out why these rogue wizards are here?"

"They probably are after Draco due to his pureblood and being considered a 'blood traitor' by dating me," Hermione said.

Newt nodded as he spread cream over his scone but Ron made a strangled noise. "Dating?" Ron asked. He stared from Hermione to Draco and back. "You meant something different than, you know, dating, right Mione?"

Hermione smiled a little but it was mostly to hide her wince. "No, Ronald. I meant dating dating."

Ron stared at Hermione and a big blob of jam rolled down his knife and plopped on the table. He didn't seem to notice. He just continued to ogle her. Hermione sighed and turned away. Harry had his arms crossed and his mouth was pulled into a thin line but he didn't say anything. Draco had sat back and was watching everything with a lazy smirk. Any minute now he was going to open his mouth and make some provocative comment that wouldn't help anything. She kicked him under the table.

"Don't," she hissed at him.

He raised an eyebrow but his smirk deepened. He leaned in very close to her and whispered. "Don't what?"

She turned to look him and her cheek pressed against his jaw and nose, his breath trailing down her neck. "You know exactly what," she huffed, trying to lean back to break the contact and actually be able to look at him straight on.

Instead, he followed her so that their cheeks were still hovering against each others', his stubble prickling as it grazed her. "What, enjoying having you as my girlfriend?"

She shivered at the unfamiliar label. "That's not what you were doing," she hissed, barely audible as his ear was inches away.

She couldn't see his face but he chuckled against her throat. "Are you sure? You must know it brings me joy to torture your dunderheaded sidekicks."

When she looked up, the whole table was staring at her. She straightened up and tried to clear her throat. "So… boyfriend. I mean, Draco is my boyfriend. Yes, so, that means" -the rest of the sentence sobered her immediately- "he is the target."

The table was silent. Harry's jaw was clenched and Ron was shaking his head.

"You really think it's Malfoy?" Ron asked.

Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Mr. Weasley," Newt said, wringing his gnarled hands in front of him a few times. "If I may? Looking at the facts, especially in the newspapers and general sentiments..." he trailed off and gazed at his hands absently. "Yes, if you look at these, it would appear as the most logical assumption, particularly since we did not have a solid logical reasoning behind any of the other theories."

Mrs. Scamander patted his shoulder and smiled.

He gave her look that was halfway between startled and loving. Hermione wondered if he always looked half-startled.

Harry sighed. "Well, if that is the case then we need someone with you, Hermione, to make sure you are safe when you both go to school." Harry didn't quite look at Draco and then asked, "Is your address public knowledge?"

Draco leaned back in his chair and smirked again.

Hermione, worried he was going to draw it out, jumped in to answer, "I don't even know where it is."

Everyone's gaze embarrassed her again and especially Harry's sigh of relief.

"It doesn't matter," she quickly jumped in to say. "He isn't going to stay there unless one of us goes with him."

"No, they aren't," Draco said just as Ron yelped, "Not me!"

"Right," she said. "So it's settled?"

"Yes," Harry answered, smiling a little smugly. "Your protection will be Ginny. She'll be coming with both of you to school today."

Hermione yawned. School. Why didn't it stop when important things were happening? She never could absorb the information like she wanted to with so many other things going on. "Fine, we take Ginny and Draco stays with us until the snakehead issue blows over."

Harry grimaced but nodded.


	57. In which there is a Weasley and a Malfoy

Hermione explained Ginny's presence by saying she was a cousin visiting from England. This worked until John actually got a good look at her after the first class.

"Your cousin is Ginny Weasley?" John said loudly, causing several of the other students to look back at them. He leaned over Hermione and grabbed Ginny's hand in a firm grip. "Wow. Can I get an autograph? Are you coming back? I could bring a jersey or something for you to sign. I've got all the merchandise. Sweatshirt, pants, socks. Big fan."

Ginny shook his hand with a bemused smile playing on her face. She looked over at Hermione and mouthed, "Pants?"

Hermione glared back and whispered, "Drop it."

Ginny's smirk grew and she turned back to John.

"You know her?" Daryn asked, leaning forward to get a good look at Ginny.

"Uh, yeah. She's the Holyhead Harpies' chaser? Excellent single-handed broom navigation and her feints are legendary!"

Daryn nodded and then yawned. "Sorry, I'm sure it's really impressive. I'm not much into sports," he apologized.

Ginny smiled at Daryn as well and then addressed John. "Of course I can sign something for you. You sure you wouldn't want it to be something more interesting... like your pants?" She followed this with a flirtatious grin.

"Um, I mean, sure," John stumbled. "But it's a little weird, don't you think? Usually it's the shirt that people sign."

Ginny's grin only widened at John's response and her eyes flicked towards Hermione. "Oh... sometimes I get that request from very eager fans."

"Shut it, Ginny," Hermione groaned.

John cocked his head and looked between the two of them. "I feel like I'm missing something here."

At that, Ginny bent over her desk and started giggling.

Draco cleared his throat and Hermione looked over to see some of that devilish humor in his eyes too. He completely ignored her frantic gesture to shut up. "When British hear pants they think what's left after you take off your trousers," he informed John with a flat tone belied by the smirk pulling at the edge of his mouth.

John's eyes went wide.

"She was joking!" Hermione said rather loudly. "She has got an awful sense of humor."

"I'd say it was a rather wicked one," Draco said, flashing Ginny a thumbs up.

Ginny looked surprised and then gave him a tentative smile.

The upside of that conversation was that everyone got distracted from questions about why Hermione might lie about Ginny's identity or why she was there in the first place. Moreover, the tension that Hermione had been dreading between Ginny and Draco never reached the levels she had thought were unavoidable. During the rest of the school day they mostly ignored each other but when they did interact it was with cautious politeness. In fact, there was more tension between Draco and Shandra than Draco and Ginny. Shandra had taken to completely ignoring Draco or referring to him as if he wasn't present. Everyone else was quick to point out how immature she was being, but Draco had started a habit of leaving when they were in the decision-making part of their group project conversations. She had just finished one of these strained conversations when she turned to see Draco and Ginny talking in low tones. However, when they saw her watching, they immediately stopped.

"You don't need to stop because of me," Hermione offered but neither of them choose to finish their discussion. She rolled her eyes. "Fine. I need to pick up some supplies that Harry asked for. Ginny, could you continue your guard duty and escort Draco home?"

Ginny snorted and Draco grumbled something under his breath before asking, "And what about you?"

Hermione waved his concern away. "The snakeheads aren't worried about muggleborns. Just blood traitors." She couldn't help saying the last bit a little dramatically.

Ginny gave a theatrical gasp. "Hermione, how could you? Asking me to interact with scum like a blood traitor?"

Draco raised an eyebrow. "Said the blood traitor."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Good. And now that that is settled..." She waved at them before they could start another argument, and left for the floo.

...

She arrived at the Scamanders' with both arms loaded down by bags, having bought a little more than what was probably strictly necessary. As she exited the fireplace, she was met with raised voices coming from the kitchen that sounded like Draco, Harry, and Ron. Hermione sighed, not sure what else she had been expecting. She readjusted the bags for a better grip and then went to confront her friends.

"... can't be interested in a ferret," Ron said.

"Oh, and being a nursemaid to a slobbering idiot is better?" Draco responded.

Hermione halted just out of sight and wondered if she should interrupt this conversation.

"At least she wouldn't be dead," Harry joined in. "After she's betrayed to your deatheater friends."

"Ex-deatheater," Draco said, mostly under his breath, and continued, "you do have enough brain cells to remember they are after me, right?"

"And who says you won't give her up to them to save your own skin?" Harry asked. "You were rather good at that, as I recall."

"And you were always good at recklessly putting all your friends in danger to put yourself in the spotlight."

"I did not!"

"Oh, that sting, Potter?"

"I'll show you what would sting, Malfoy." Ron jumped into the conversation again.

At that point, Hermione decided to intervene. She walked into the kitchen, and hefted the bags a little higher up on her arms. "Would you boys help me with these?" she asked, walking right between Draco and the other two. She tried not to look back or show any nervousness about the situation and instead slid the supplies onto the side of the kitchen table that wasn't full of maps and tactical planning supplies.

Draco immediately followed and then Harry and Ron returned to the other side of the table, subtly claiming territory for their Auror planning.

Now the two sides were ignoring each other and all of their attention was on Hermione. She cleared her throat and straightened. "Harry, Ron, I've bought the supplies you asked for to develop more attuned sensors to find the moving tracker. Draco, I brought things for our potions final. Would you come help me prepare that?"

"Mione, why can't you let him do that himself? We need you here," Ron said.

Hermione gave him a stern glare without actually addressing his question and lightly led Draco out of the room.

As Draco helped her unpack the potion supplies, his eyes were hooded and unfocused and only responded to her questions with monosyllables.

Having little patience for Draco's sullenness and Harry and Ron's rants that seemed to preclude and follow any useful information, Hermione decided to leave the oppressive atmosphere of the Scamanders' home. Daryn had mentioned that Ari had been missing her since she hadn't visited the YWC lately. She decided that she would spend the evening there.

However, even though she had left the drama behind her, she couldn't stop being preoccupied with it. Seeing her friends should have been a good thing but instead she couldn't help wishing that they had never come. Of course, that would have meant that they wouldn't have realized someone was after Draco until it would probably have been too late.

She stepped out of the floo into the YWC, still preoccupied with her musings, and was surprised to have someone push into her space.

"How dare you let him come here, you knowing everything!"

Hermione looked up to be confronted by an unfamiliar woman in a halter top that might have worked on someone twenty years younger. She looked around, trying to get context for this woman assaulting her.

The secretary, still sporting her tie-over-a-tank-top look, simply shrugged, giving her a half-apologetic look.

"You put my son in danger!" the woman continued to rant, shoving her newsboy cap to glare straight into Hermione's eyes. "How dare you, being hailed as some savior for the European Wizards, pull off a stunt like this!"

The accusation stung, especially when she remembered the little boy who had dangled in her arms over several stories of open air. However, that hadn't been Draco's fault. She returned the woman's glare unflinchingly. "And, as the savior of the European Wizards," Hermione answered quietly. "Do you think I would let someone who I thought was dangerous enter a facility for children?"

"Well, obviously you did," the woman blustered, coming close enough to invade Hermione's personal space.

Hermione again managed to take this unflinchingly even as guilt threatened to choke her from the inside. However, anything that this woman was upset about had been because of Hermione, not Draco. She raised her chin, able to channel her righteous indignation that everyone and everything seemed intent on tearing Draco down. "Right, I forgot about helping him sneak in and assisting him in slaughtering all the muggleborn children," she hissed.

"Hermione!" the secretary protested and the unknown woman's eyes flashed.

Hermione glanced over at Lori and remembered that this was a children's facility and, from an outsider's perspective, a man with death-eater connections shouldn't have been allowed to work with them. She turned back to the mother and was again met with burning hatred.

Hermione straightened, and returned the stare. "I understand your concerns. But did he hurt any of the children? Did he bully them or show any prejudice? No, he did not. He saved one, instead. So maybe he shouldn't have been working here but he isn't anymore. Do you think dragging him through the dirt and accusing him of being near Satan himself actually did anything productive?"

"The way those rags carried on, it sounded like you were some kind of saint! That's the last time I'm believing foreign newspapers," the woman huffed and pushed past her.

Hermione let the woman brush past, turning to watch as she flooed away. Hermione ran her hands through her hair, feeling drained. Why didn't it feel like they could catch a break lately? Finally she raised her head and smiled at the secretary. "Hey, Lori."

She smiled back. "Long time no see. What's up?"

Hermione shrugged as she signed in, seeing no reason to inform her of the very long list of things that happened since the last time she had attended the club.

"Draco came and explained what happened after he apparated you to the hospital," Lori confided. "He was pretty freaked. It must have been pretty bad."

Hermione shrugged. "I lost a lot of blood and wasn't being coherent. I think that would be concerning for most people."

"Yeah, but Draco isn't most people," Lori said slyly. "It kind of freaks you out more when you are head over heels in love with them."

Startled, Hermione dropped the pen. Without checking Lori's reaction, Hermione ducked down to grab it from the ground. She stayed there just a little longer to let the raised heat in her cheeks dissipate.

Lori leaned over the desk and grinned. "Well?"

Hermione stood quickly and lifted her chin. "Well, what?"

"He is in love with you!" Lori said excitedly. "Oh my gosh! That newspaper was right? You've got to be kidding me."

Hermione quickly placed her hands over Lori's mouth and looked around. "Please be quiet!"

Lori's eyes widened and she peeled back one of Hermione's hands. "You're in love with him too, aren't you?"

Hermione groaned and let her head drop forward a little.

"Have you guys made out yet?"

Startled, Hermione pulled her hands back. "Erm... well. Not exactly... not that you really need to know."

Lori's grin widened, if that was possible. "Then get on that!"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "The next time I see him I will trap him against the wall and then... make out, especially if it is in your vicinity."

She had already turned and started down the hallway when Lori's response reached her, "Good! You'd better tell me when it happens!"

Safely around the corner, she let out a slow breath. Sure, there were times where she had been pretty certain he wanted to kiss her and once when she had been almost sure that he was going to. Of course, there was the disaster of a kiss when she had tried to initiate it. Then, when they finally seemed to make peace between them, Harry and the others had showed up. Since then, they barely had any time together that wasn't overshadowed by one crisis or another. She gently touched a finger to her lips. So the only kiss they had shared had just been painful for both of them. She squeezed her bottom lip between thumb and forefinger, wishing it was different. Were they ever going to find a moment when something wasn't getting in their way?

She shook away these melancholic thoughts and took in the big room where most of the children were if there weren't outside activities. A young woman in a ruffley shirt waved her over. "Hey, I need to check on the kids making snowmen. Would you be cool staying with them?" She made a broad gesture to encompass the other children.

"Of course," Hermione agreed, and after the other volunteer was gone, she turned in a slow circle and saw that most of the children were engrossed in wizarding games she wasn't familiar with. With no literal or figurative fires to put out, she headed over to Ari, whom she had recognized during her sweep of the room. She changed the chair next to him from pink to its typical black and then sat down.

He looked up solemnly from underneath his messy black hair and then returned to his assignment. "Draco is in trouble, isn't he?"

She nodded. "It's not too bad, but they won't let him back to the YWC."

"My father won't let him visit anymore."

"Yes..." she looked down and rubbed her forehead. "Well. The bad stuff he'd done before was published in the newspaper. Your father wasn't very happy about that."

Ari nodded, scratching out an equation.

"You miss him?" -he didn't respond except to pause in writing- "He misses you. He is so angry that he isn't allowed to see you."

Ari looked up, his eyes shining. "Are you sure? He hasn't even sent me an owl! Why would he do that if he cared?"

She thought for a moment and then asked, "Would your father let you get an owl from him?"

His shoulders slumped and he shook his head. He rubbed his eyes and went back to the equation.

"You want me to send him a message? I'm not as fast as an owl but your father can't stop me, as long as he doesn't know about it."

Ari pulled out a blank piece of parchment and then stared at it.

"You could tell him was has happened since the last time you saw him."

He gave a dejected little shrug. "I'm still doing well in my classes. A friend let me watch a muggle show with them." He brightened a little as he mentioned it. "They used the bad guy's phone to hunt him down."

"Oh? How did they do that?"

"They didn't explain a lot but they used different places to collect the phone signal and with that they were able to tri-angle-late the position."

"Huh, that's actually pretty interesting," Hermione said. "I suppose they needed three signals and that's why it was called triangulating?" She thought for a moment. "That makes sense."

"Why does it make sense?" Ari asked, head cocked a little.

"We're trying to find a bad guy but he is moving around too much. If we had three signals it would be easier to find him when the signal becomes weak."

Ari narrowed his eyes. "Okay," he said in a tone that probably implied that Hermione had been speaking utter nonsense.

"You write to Draco and explain the Muggle story line to him too." She stood up and patted his shoulder. "I'm going to check on everyone else."

She wandered again through the room, making sure none of the children needed help with homework or their games. She was almost done when she noticed a pudgy boy sitting in one of the corners, sneaking glances at her.

It was the boy who nearly died the last time she was here. She froze and had a very strong impulse to bolt for the door. She really didn't want to confront this poor kid and thus confront a rather painful memory of her shortcomings. Instead, she took a deep breath and reminded herself that discomfort would be temporary and running away from things had been what had gotten that boy in that bind anyways.

She slowly approached him, waiting for any signs that the boy didn't want to see her. However, once she was close enough, he looked up and smiled.

Her heart broke and such a sweet expression. She smiled back and sat next to him on one of the small chairs. "How are you doing?"

He shrugged shyly.

"Did you get hurt when you fell?"

The boy shook his head. "Draco caught me with his magic! It was like landing on the back of a jellyfish, it was soft and cushy and I didn't get hurt at all! The Club nurse treated my scratches and we didn't even have to go the hospital."

Hermione smiled encouragingly. "I'm really glad to hear that. I'm sorry I haven't visited you before this."

"Lori said you got really hurt and had to go to the hospital. Are you finally better?"

Guilt made her heart even heavier. She had been so caught up in her own problems, she had barely spared a thought for this little boy. "Yes, thank you."

"Did Draco fix you? Lori said he is going to be a healer and fix people with magic."

Hermione could hear the hero-worship in the kid's voice. She smiled. "He did fix me with magic before we went to the hospital. He will make a greater healer, won't he?" However, that was the problem, wasn't it? He would make a great healer and he made a great mentor for these little boys. Yet, the world didn't work that way. "Draco can't come back, though. He has to focus on being a healer now." She would make sure of it.

The boy nodded his head, looking resigned. "Yeah, Mom said she would make sure he never came back."

Hermione patted the boy's shoulder. "Sorry," she said, saying so little but meaning so much.

...

By the time that she got back from the YWC, almost everyone was already in bed. So she waited until morning to explain her new plan. She was able to convince Harry and Ron of trying this method of triangulation until she brought up the problem of reproducing the signature of the tracker for the other two devices.

"This actually might be addressed by using a potion," Draco said when she paused for breath. "If you let me look at how it's designed I might be able to make something that could clone the signatures."

Hermione brightened and looked over to Harry and Ron.

"It's bad enough you are making us live under the same roof as the ferret," Ron moaned.

"We aren't putting our best asset in his hands," Harry agreed.

"He is the one we are trying to protect." Hermione put her hands on her hips. "Do you really think that he is going to tamper with it?"

"It hasn't been proven he is the target." Harry crossed his arms. "We still don't know if we can trust him."

"This is the best lead we've gotten since you showed up," Hermione said in annoyance. "We are going to waste it because you are being paranoid. Ginny will watch him the whole time he is with the tracker and you both go off and do whatever Auror things Aurors do when not harassing the victims."

"Ginny?" Harry said with disgust. "She can't be alone with Malfoy!"

Ginny, who had been calming eating her toast, sat it down on her plate and turned to glare at Harry. "I think it's a fabulous idea, Hermione."

Hermione relaxed a little, happy Ginny seemed to be still softening towards Draco.

Draco shrugged and smirked a little. "Yes, it's a fabulous idea, Hermione," he echoed in mimicry.

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Of course you think it's a fabulous idea, Malfoy. You get to spend time with the fabulous Chaser Weasley. You got some pants you want me to sign?"

When Ginny had the audacity to add a wink to the end of that speech, Harry started sputtering and the verbal volleys picked up again between Harry, Ron, and Draco. Hermione closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead, thinking that having Ginny and Draco on the same side wasn't the boon she originally thought it was.

...

As always props to my angel of a beta, Fleurdelys21, who makes sure my jokes make sense and my grammar isn't horrendous and, well, magics everything better XD

Love, Sam


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